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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27120388">Stages: A Series of Short Stories</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/peanutbutterandchelly/pseuds/peanutbutterandchelly'>peanutbutterandchelly</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Stages [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Midnight Poppy Land (Webcomic)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Honeymoon, Marriage, One Shot Collection, Opening Up, Romance, Sex, Smut, Stages of Relationships, Trust</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 18:09:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>134,560</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27120388</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/peanutbutterandchelly/pseuds/peanutbutterandchelly</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of "Stages" short stories inspired by reader suggestions.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tora/Poppy, Tora/Poppy Wilkes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Stages [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1961800</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>425</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>417</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Adjust</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Tora and Poppy navigate through the adjustments of moving in together.</p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p><p>---</p><p>HI HEY THERE I'M BACK AND I MISSED YOU ALL SO MUCH. </p><p>I'm so so excited to finally be uploading this! I absolutely loved reading through all of your suggestions for one-shot ideas and it's my goal to bring as many of them to life as I can, whether that means writing an entire segment based on one idea or combining several to create one piece. </p><p>I wanted to give credit to a few people for this first work:</p><p>Zoety and GeekGoddess for their suggestions/comments regarding this particular scenario,<br/>BegoniaRex, my best friend Gaby and my husband Travis for beta-reading and offering their insight.</p><p>I hope you all enjoy this collection! </p><p>Thank you for reading and being here for another installment of this series; I can't say how thrilled I am that you're not tired of it yet LOL</p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Oh, when I first met you<br/>
There were things I'd been through<br/>
That I would never tell</p><p>But it was almost as if<br/>
You already knew my language<br/>
‘Cause you'd been there yourself</p><p>Oh, I'm still falling<br/>
Oh, don't make me return”<br/>
-Gavin DeGraw, “Spell It Out”</p><p>---</p><p>When Tora stepped through the door of their one-bedroom apartment, it dawned on him that it was the first time he and Poppy were living together by <em>choice.</em></p><p>Tora had loved Poppy’s apartment; after all, it was the place that witnessed their first dinner together, their first kiss, the place that revealed to him all his tiny girlfriend’s inner strength and bravery. Though, as warm and happy as it made him feel, it was never truly his <em>home.</em> </p><p>When he’d temporarily taken up residence at that apartment, it wasn’t <em>happily</em> or because they were taking the next step in their relationship; it was due to an outside threat, a direct circumstance of the life that Tora led. </p><p>Kane, he felt, had eventually rendered him choiceless when it came to defending Poppy. In the end, the only thing that made sense, that made her <em>safe</em> was to stay there with her. </p><p>Between Gyu’s watchful eyes and Tora’s instincts and training, Poppy’s apartment, once her quiet, cozy home, had become a target, a fortress, impenetrable and while secure, it lacked any of its previous warmth. </p><p>And Tora, while he knew he was more than just a guest to Poppy, felt anxious, <em>guilty,</em> a constant six foot three reminder of the danger he’d brought down on her. </p><p>It was never anything Poppy had done or said to make him feel that way; it was him, the seeds of self-loathing and shame that Vincent planted, that Tora then spent years nurturing.</p><p>Christ, it’d taken him ages to get over that feeling, like he wasn’t just lurking and taking up space in her house. </p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched as his brain was then painted with images of the second apartment they’d ever shared; it wasn’t a home, but a means to an end, another direct circumstance of his lifestyle. That apartment felt much like the first: a target, a fortress, impenetrable. </p><p>Of course, being issued by the temporary witness protection program they’d been enrolled in, Tora expected nothing less. It wasn’t <em>meant</em> to feel like home; its sole purpose was to serve as a shelter to survive in until the trials were over and the death threats ceased. </p><p><em>True</em> homes were not decorated with security cameras and cluttered piles of paperwork from a criminal trial you were involved in. Bodyguards did not make proper lawn ornaments and armed chauffeurs were hardly who you wanted driving you to the gas station in the middle of the night because you ran out of menstrual pads. </p><p>Fuck, he <em>hated</em> that apartment; it felt too similar, too close to the one he’d lived in when he met Poppy. It was drab, bare and under a constant dark cloud of paranoia and dread. This cloud often opened up and left raindrops on Poppy’s cheeks as she broke down under the intensity of it all. </p><p>As if they weren’t under enough stress already, that fucking apartment stirred up long dormant, <em>horrible</em> memories; they resurfaced as night terrors that left him thrashing in his sleep, waking in a panic and scaring the <em>shit</em> out of Poppy.</p><p>The fifth night he woke up swinging and covered in a sheen of sweat beside her, Tora rose out of bed and moved into the living room, where he curled up in front of the door. Never mind that the property was dotted with security guards; they couldn’t protect her like he could. Nobody was getting past him. <em>This</em> was the only way to keep her safe, from intruders, clan retaliation, Vincent. </p><p>From himself.</p><p>Countless times Poppy had tried to convince him to come back and sleep beside her, but her efforts were fruitless; she always returned to a bed that remained empty.</p><p>Tora missed her desperately, the curves of her body pressed against him, the soft, sweet sounds she made while she rested, the way she woke up reaching for him. It killed him knowing that she was just down the hall, but he was smart enough to recognize that he needed to keep his distance from her. He’d become unpredictable, dangerous, <em>another</em> threat to her safety and he couldn’t risk hurting her even more. </p><p>The day that Tora couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept in the bed was the same day the trials came to an end. While it was a consolation that Vincent had been sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole, Tora’s momentary relief was shattered by the realization that they weren’t out of the woods yet. </p><p>Clan retaliation was still an ever present, lurking fear that Lane did her best to squash. She assigned officers to twenty-four hour patrol of their neighborhood and even dispatched some undercover men to Ares Street; they were to keep their eyes and ears open for any plans of revenge toward Tora, Poppy and their friends. </p><p>Over the next three months, two assassination attempts were thwarted and once it was determined who was behind them, Vincent Balthuman was stripped of all contact to the outside world. During this time, Tora caught bouts of fitful sleep between the sofa and the living room floor, his dreams plagued by images of Vincent appearing at their door like a vengeful vampire, determined to suck the very life out of Poppy. Poppy, bleeding out on the dirty, concrete floor of a warehouse. </p><p>It took several meetings with Lane and deep discussions with his girlfriend and Quincey before Tora felt those shadows begin to recede into the depths of his mind. The evening he finally felt comfortable enough to share a bed with her again, Poppy pounced on him. He made love to her twice that night and afterwards, he slept dreamlessly, long and heavy into the next morning. </p><p>And now? Now that they were in a tiny apartment with both of their names on the lease, surrounded by Poppy’s paintings of owls, plants and the beach, sharing a bed that they bought <em>together,</em> Tora awoke in the mornings fully rested, his arms wrapped around the only thing that mattered.</p><p>---</p><p>“Tora? Can you hand me the ginger, please?” </p><p>Tora looked down at the tiny woman beside him. “Why? Can’t reach it?” he smirked at her. </p><p>Poppy’s hands stilled over the mug of hot tea she was preparing and she scowled up at him playfully. “I can so reach it! But your big body is in the way and you’re closer to the cabinet.”</p><p>Tora laughed at her. Since they’d moved into their new apartment a few weeks ago, she’d been feistier than ever. He chalked her sudden lighthearted teasing up to relief, to their newfound freedom. No more security systems, bodyguards, death threats. This was <em>theirs,</em> the life they chose to live together.</p><p>“Sure, lemme just stop doin’ the dishes, dry my hands off and grab it for ya, my queen,” he chuckled as he reached for the hand towel and bowed in her direction. </p><p>Poppy smiled at him, her eyes glittering with mirth. “Bless you, noble squire,” she giggled. “Oh, speaking of that, I saw an ad at the grocery store for a Renaissance Fair next month. It’s in a town about an hour away and I thought it would be fun…”</p><p>Tora tuned her out as he opened the cabinet door; he had yet to prepare a meal for them in the new place and this was the first time he’d even peered inside. His eyes widened as he took in the sight of the army of herbs and spices: they were tucked into neat, uniformed rows, all the labels facing outward. And were they… <em>alphabetized?</em></p><p>“Uh, Bobby? Ya alphabetized our food?” Tora asked as he plucked the ginger from its place beside the garlic powder. </p><p>“Oh, um, yeah. I did it at my first apartment, too. I just like to organize things and…” A blush colored her cheeks as she took notice of him smirking at her. “Oh, would you stop looking at me like that?!” she shrieked. “It makes everything easier to find and we can see when we’re running low on something. Yes, I’m a nerd, so sue me,” she finished under her breath. </p><p>“Pfft, yer fuckin’ adorable,” he laughed and kissed the top of her head as he passed the ginger to her. “Whatever makes ya happy.”</p><p>She narrowed her eyes and then sprinkled the yellow powder into the mug. She grabbed a spoon from the utensil drawer and looked up at him one more time as she stirred her green tea. </p><p>Tora flashed her a wide smile. She turned her back on him then and he heard her mutter something about <em>”obscene</em> dimples” before she disappeared around the corner.</p><p>She was a goddamn nerd all right; the cutest one he’d ever seen. </p><p>He finished scrubbing and rinsing the last two bowls before setting them carefully in the drying rack. He toweled off his hands and then picked up the bottle of ground ginger she’d left out on the counter. Without looking, he plunked it back into the cabinet before joining her in the other room.</p><p>---</p><p>“God damnit, Ronzo, I told ya to watch yer fuckin’ six,” Tora growled as he stabbed his fingers down on the game controller. </p><p>“Bro, I <em>was-“</em></p><p>Before Gyu said another word, an enemy player swiveled out from behind a broken stone archway and shot Tora’s character to death. </p><p>“Fuckin’ camper!” Tora yelled as he threw the controller down on the hard wood floor. </p><p>“Bro, he wasn’t camping,” Gyu said. “He literally just ran over here-”</p><p>“Playin’ with a bucket of cunts,” Tora seethed. “God damn Noah’s ark couldn’t carry you fucks.”</p><p>Gyu and Tora’s work friend Avery howled with laughter as Tora continued to spew a string of curses and insults at them. He finally picked up the controller and selected the rematch option from the main menu. “All right, we’re gonna do this again,” he said. “And when I say watch yer <em>fuckin’ six-“</em></p><p>“Um, Tora?” Poppy’s voice drifted out from the couch behind him. </p><p>“Yeah, Bobby?” he asked. </p><p>“Hey, Pops!” Gyu and Avery called out over the tv. </p><p>“They can hear me?” Poppy asked. </p><p>“Yeah, I’m just wearin’ the mic around my neck.”</p><p>“Oh. Hi, guys!” she called back to his friends. “Tora, do you think you can make it so all the sound goes through your headset?” she asked. “I just have a lot to work to do and I’m trying to focus.”</p><p>He turned around to look at her and she gestured toward the pile of papers and notebooks that littered their round coffee table. </p><p>“Sorry, sweetheart. Don’t like havin’ the headset on. It’s noise cancellin’ and I like to be able ta hear what’s goin’ on around me.” It was how he’d always played at his apartment; when he’d been in the clan, there were too many risks involved with shutting down <em>any</em> of his senses to his surroundings. He was free now, he understood this, but he wanted to be able to hear Poppy if she needed him. </p><p>“Tora, my notes on this manuscript are due tomorrow. Can’t you please just wear it for tonight? Or pick the game back up when I’m finished?” she asked on a sigh. </p><p>He frowned. He was trying to unwind with his friends after a long day at work. Surely she could understand that. “Why don’tcha take it into the kitchen? Table’s bigger in there, anyway,” he reasoned. </p><p>“It’s an open floor plan,” she bit out. “I can still <em>hear</em> you in there.”</p><p>“Poppy, this is Gyu’s only night off during the week,” Tora shot back. “Ya know we play on Wednesdays.”</p><p>She shoved herself off the couch then, sending random papers fluttering to the floor. “Fine, <em>fine,”</em> she hissed. “I’ll just pick up all of my things and work in the bedroom, even though I was in here <em>first.”</em></p><p>Tora watched in silence as she collected the loose paper and journals off the coffee table. She stormed into their bedroom and slammed the door shut behind her. </p><p>After a moment, Gyu’s soft voice floated through the speaker. “Uh, bro, everything okay?”</p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched. What the fuck was her problem? She’d never had an issue with him playing video games before. Of course, he’d never really played any around her until recently. </p><p>At the witness protection apartment, he’d done little to entertain himself; his mind was so consumed by the trial and everything that could go wrong, he was afraid of what might happen if he afforded himself even the slightest bit of distraction. His nights had consisted of curling up with Poppy on the couch, meetings with their lawyers and phone conversations with Lane.</p><p>They’d never been given the opportunity to have this particular problem before; there were far other important things going on at that time. </p><p><em>This</em> was supposed to be the easy part; they’d already been through hell and come out the other side. Now was the time for happiness, relaxation, making decisions and planning their life together. </p><p>So why did this suddenly feel like… the opposite of that?</p><p>“Bro?” Gyu asked again. </p><p>Tora’s head snapped up. “Uh, yeah. Yeah. We’re fine. Everythin’ will be fine.”</p><p>---</p><p><em>”Ow!</em> Son of a fudge biscuit!”</p><p>At the sound of Poppy’s voice, Tora was out of bed in a flash and darted across the hall into the dark bathroom. He snapped the light on and saw her sprawled out on the tiled floor, clutching at her ankle. </p><p>“S’matter, Bobby? Ya hurt?” he asked as he crouched down beside her. He took her leg in his hands and lightly squeezed at her knee, her ankle. She winced as he applied pressure to the spot she’d been favoring. </p><p>“Ah, just a bit,” she said. “I got up to pee and my foot got caught in your clothes.” She pointed at the shirt and jeans he’d tossed on the floor after his shower earlier that evening. “I tripped and I must’ve rolled my ankle.”</p><p>“Here, Bobby, let’s make sure ya can stand on it,” he said and gently helped haul her to her feet. </p><p>“Why do you always have to throw your clothes on the fudging floor?” she asked, her tone suddenly low and accusing. “The hamper is right there!”</p><p>Anger flared in Tora’s temples and burned behind his eyes. Seriously, she wanted to fight at two in the fucking morning? “Well, why was the damn light off in here?” he hissed. “If ya could see what you were doin’, maybe you wouldn’t have tripped.”</p><p>“I don’t like to turn the light on in the middle of the night,” she grumbled as she steadied herself on both feet. “It wakes me up and I have a hard time going back to sleep.”</p><p>Tora sighed. Of all the reasons she’d ever fallen, this had to take the fucking cake. “Turn the light on from now on,” he told her. “Then ya won’t fuckin’ hurt yerself.”</p><p>“Or here’s an idea: maybe put your dirty clothes in the hamper where they’re out of the way? You can throw them a couple more inches in that direction, can’t you?” she spat.</p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched.</p><p>
  <em>This was supposed to be the easy part.</em>
</p><p>She turned around then and slowly huffed away from him, limping as she did. </p><p>“Poppy, get back here. We need to get some ice on that ankle,” he called after her. </p><p>“I’m fine!” she yelled from their bedroom. </p><p>He sighed.</p><p>Sure, she’d probably be fine. </p><p>But… would <em>they?</em><br/>
---</p><p>“So I was chatting with one of the baristas at that little coffee shop on the corner,” Poppy said as she hovered over their kitchen stove. “Do you remember that break-in from a couple of days ago?”</p><p>Tora leaned against the counter beside her and crossed his arms over his chest. It was only all he’d been fucking thinking about: how he would stop an intruder and how he would protect her no matter the cost. </p><p>“Mmmhmm,” he replied. </p><p>“Well, it turns out there was another one not too far from here,” she continued. “No one was home when it happened, thank goodness. But it’s still scary. Apparently they got away with a laptop and a flat screen tv. Nothing that can’t be replaced. Not like what Ka-“</p><p>Poppy paused and shot him a wide-eyed look. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-“</p><p>Tora sighed. “S’fine, Bobby,” he told her. “We don’t ever hafta worry about him again. And you don’t have to worry about these stupid fucks runnin’ around right now, either. Yer the most important thing in my life and ya know I’ll keep you safe, right?”</p><p>A smile immediately warmed her face. “I know, Tora. But you don’t have to…“ she trailed off as she opened the spice cabinet and poked her head inside. </p><p>“S’matter?” Tora asked after a handful of silent seconds. </p><p>“Well, it’s just… I wish you’d put things back where they belonged,” she sighed at him as she shuffled things around. </p><p>“I worked really hard to organize this kitchen for us and I’m the one who usually cooks, so it’s nice to have everything where I need it. Look… we don’t have enough garlic powder to finish dinner.” </p><p>She set the near empty bottle down on the counter. “I didn’t know that because it was shoved behind the paprika.”</p><p>Tora pinched the bridge of his nose. </p><p>
  <em>This was supposed to be the easy part.</em>
</p><p>And here he was, just constantly fucking things up.</p><p>“Shit… I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’ll try to be better,” he said and stepped around her so he was standing in front of the cabinet. </p><p><em>“Better?”</em> she asked softly as he began to pull all the spices down from their shelves. “Tora…”</p><p>“I’ll fix it, Bobby. I promise I’m gonna fix it.”</p><p>That night, after tossing and turning, Tora woke from his first night terror in months. When he did, he was pinning Poppy to their bed with one fist cocked back.</p><p>---</p><p>“Tora?” </p><p>Poppy’s soft voice roused him from the living room floor. He opened his bleary eyes and looked up at her. </p><p>“Please come back to bed,” she quietly pleaded. “It’s going to be okay. We’ll figure this out.”</p><p>“Can’t,” he gruffed out. “Gotta keep ya safe.”</p><p>He didn’t trust himself enough to be around her while he slept; the night terrors were far too frequent and unpredictable.</p><p>“You can’t keep doing this,” she whimpered in the dark. “The police caught that thief weeks ago…”</p><p>“Not worried 'bout him,” he muttered and rolled away from her to face the door.</p><p>---</p><p>Tora awoke to Poppy’s tiny hand rubbing his arm. </p><p>“Tora?” </p><p>Over the next two weeks it had become a routine; he would pass out in front of the living room door and at some point during the night, Poppy would emerge from their bedroom and try to persuade him to come sleep beside her. </p><p>Every night, Tora refused. </p><p>Not until he was better.</p><p>“Mmm?” he murmured and rolled over to face her. </p><p>”Please come back to bed,” she said brokenly. “I <em>miss</em> you.”</p><p>“Can’t,” he replied. </p><p>“We’re supposed to be moving forward,” Poppy cried. “Tora, we- we can’t do this anymore.”</p><p>His eyes shot open as her words triggered something in his head, his heart. </p><p>Sharp, flickering images of her sitting on the floor of his old apartment, tears pouring down her face.</p><p>
  <em>”I love you and I’m sorry, but I can’t live like this anymore.”</em>
</p><p>A bubble too big for his chest pressed painfully into his ribs and began to squeeze its way up his throat.</p><p>“What?” he choked out as he met her tearful gaze. “We can’t… you sayin’ it’s over?”</p><p>He’d been anticipating it for weeks, but fuck, it still hurt as much as that first time. Although, unlike the last time, there were things he’d actually have to <em>do</em> now: find a new place to live, get back on his own cell phone plan… return the engagement ring.</p><p>This was it. This would be the thing that killed him. </p><p>Poppy’s eyebrows furrowed then and her mouth set in a stern line. “What? Over?”  she asked and then laid herself down beside him. She took his face in her hands and forced him to look at her. “Tora, we’re not <em>over,”</em> she hissed. “Not by a long shot.”</p><p>They… weren’t?</p><p>“But I keep fuckin' up,” he whispered. “I’m trying ta be better, but-“</p><p>“You keep saying that, but Tora, you’re <em>perfect</em> for me,” she said and offered him a small smile.</p><p>“But the video games and my clothes on the floor, the spice cabinet…” he trailed off.</p><p>“Stupid couple stuff. Tora, <em>everyone</em> has those fights with their partner,” she said and ran her fingers through his hair. “We’re finally living together on our own terms and as happy as we both are about it, it’s not always going to be perfect. We’re going to argue and get annoyed until we adjust and figure each other out. But we <em>will</em> figure it out. It’ll take more than your stinky clothes on the bathroom floor to drive me away,” she teased. </p><p>Tora didn’t smile. “But what about the night terrors? Bobby, if I hurt you... I’ll never be able ta forgive myself.”</p><p>Her eyes softened and her hand paused in his hair. “Well, maybe we have to accept that some things we can’t figure out, just the two of us. Maybe we should consider talking to someone. We’ve been through a lot and it might help.”</p><p>“Ya mean like a shrink?” he scoffed. </p><p>She narrowed her eyes at him. “A professional who specializes in post-traumatic stress disorder,” she said. “I went to a therapist for a couple of years after my dad passed away. She really did help. I don’t think I’d be where I am today without her.”</p><p>Tora considered this for a moment. Poppy was the strongest person he knew and if even <em>she</em> turned to someone else for support, then maybe he could too. </p><p>Shit, if he thought about it, he’d already sort of been counseled through his night terrors in that second apartment; between discussions with Poppy, Quincey and Lane, it had been enough to chase the demons away. They weren’t professionals, but they had listened to his concerns, <em>understood</em> him. </p><p>He could talk to someone again.</p><p>After all, he didn’t want to keep doing this either and the last thing he was going to do was lose Poppy over it. </p><p>“Okay,” he finally agreed after mulling it over for a few moments more. “I’ll get somethin’ set up.”</p><p>Poppy smiled brightly at him. “Good. I want you to feel better and I’ll admit… I miss having a tiger in my bed.”</p><p>He chuckled at her and leaned in for a kiss, which she eagerly accepted. </p><p>“I’m sorry, Poppylan. I’ll be better ‘bout wearin’ the headset,” he told her. “I’ll toss my stinky clothes in the hamper and I’ll make sure the spices stay in formation, accordin’ to their ranks.”</p><p>Poppy giggled. “It’s not all on you. I’m sorry too. I can be pretty… particular about the way things are done. I know how much you enjoy your time with your friends, so I’ll work in the bedroom on Wednesday nights. I’ll buy a nightlight for the bathroom. I appreciate it, Tora, but please remember that you’re the best. I couldn’t ask for anyone better than <em>you.”</em></p><p>He smiled at her, feeling lighter than he had in weeks. Stupid couple stuff. He could fix his annoying habits; he could put his damn laundry away and respect her weird kitchen quirks. The other shit would take longer to fix and she was willing to walk through it all with him. </p><p>There was no one better than her either. </p><p>And he would figure out a way to show her. </p><p>“So… will you come to bed?” she asked, her eyes shining brightly in the darkness. </p><p>His heart sank. He’d had violent dreams every night that week and he didn’t want to push his luck. He couldn’t risk hurting her, even if she trusted him not to or would be understanding if he did. </p><p>“Much as I miss ya, dunno if I can just yet,” he admitted. </p><p>“Is this about the break-ins?” she asked. “Because we can have a security system installed or we can get a dog…”</p><p>“Nah, s’not that,” he assured her. The last thing he wanted was another apartment with a security system, to feel locked down again. <em>Maybe</em> he’d install one camera for the front door and they could talk about getting a dog.</p><p>“Hmmm. Okay. Well, is there room down here for two?” she asked. </p><p>“Bobby-“</p><p>“Okay, okay. I understand,” she said and pressed a kiss to his lips before standing. “I love you, Tora. And I’m not going anywhere.” She bit her lip. “Okay, well, that’s not true. I’m going down the hall to go to bed right now but… you know what I mean.”</p><p>He laughed at her. Such a fucking goof. </p><p>“I love ya too, sweetheart. Good night.”</p><p>---</p><p>Three days later, Tora had an appointment scheduled with a therapist and a recipe for ramen that he was determined not to screw up. </p><p>He could be domestic and pull his weight. </p><p>To prove how much she meant to him, there wasn’t much he <em>wouldn’t</em> do.</p><p>He could handle one fucking dinner. </p><p>Tora hovered over the stove and adjusted the heat knob as he tossed two eggs into a pot of boiling water. He set a timer for six minutes and then pulled out the garlic and ginger powder. He poured beef stock into a second pot and once it began to boil, he tossed the noodles in. </p><p>Some recipes had said to cook them in stock, so he did. That was <em>before</em> he saw other recipes that stated it was better to boil them separately in water, so the noodles didn’t turn out gummy. </p><p>Well fuck, which way was the right way?</p><p>Tora tried not to linger too long on it; he’d already dumped them in the stock and that’s where they would stay. Poppy would be home from her yoga class in less than fifteen minutes and he didn’t have time to backpedal now. </p><p>The timer for the eggs went off, so he collected them from their pot and plunked them into a glass of ice water to finish soft-boiling. He set another timer for five minutes and continued with the next step.</p><p>He moved on to dicing mushrooms and carrots and threw them into the pot with the noodles- <em>he was supposed to do that, right?</em>- and then he browned a handful of steak cutlets until they were medium rare. </p><p>Fuck, he hoped she liked this. </p><p>Timer went off. Peel and slice the eggs, set cooked meat to the side. Tora glanced at the recipe again. </p><p>
  <em>Remove veggies and add noodles to boiling stock for four minutes.</em>
</p><p>His eyes widened.</p><p>Fuck. Fuck. FUCK. </p><p>The vegetables went in first? Separately?</p><p>The noodles only boiled for four fucking minutes?</p><p>He glanced at the clock on the microwave. They’d been in that stock for over ten minutes by now. He’d overcooked them and now the noodles, the goddamn foundation of the dish was <em>ruined.</em> The good parts: the eggs, the beef, the veggies, would all be tainted by <em>this,</em> the one thing he’d done wrong. </p><p>He shot another look at the clock. Poppy was going to be home any minute and she was going to <em>hate</em> this. </p><p>Just add it to the list of things he managed to fuck up. </p><p>“Fuck it,” he said out loud and quickly assembled the ramen bowls the way the recipe described. In the end, it wasn’t terrible; it at least looked like the picture online. </p><p>Probably didn’t taste near as good, though. </p><p>The sound of the front door unlocking reached his ears, followed by Poppy exclaiming. “Oh, something smells amazing!” </p><p>His jaw clenched as she bounced into the kitchen in a pink t-shirt and polka dot leggings. She propped herself up on her tiptoes to plant a kiss on his lips and then her gaze fell to the bowls on the counter. </p><p>“You… you cooked dinner?” she asked, her mouth stretching into a smile. </p><p>“Yeah, but don’t get too excited,” he mumbled and lowered his gaze to the floor. “I over-“</p><p>Poppy wasn’t listening to him.</p><p>She turned away and rummaged through their utensil drawer before pulling out two sets of chopsticks. She set one down on the counter and shoveled the other into one of the bowls. She lifted a hearty bite to her mouth, chewed thoughtfully and sighed. </p><p>Fucking <em>sighed.</em></p><p>“Mmm. Oh my gosh, Tora, this is so good!”</p><p>His head snapped up. </p><p>The fuck? How was it good? Weren’t the noodles fucking mush?</p><p>Tora squinted at her as he picked up the other pair of chopsticks and dipped them into the bowl. He brought them to his mouth and chewed. Yup, mushy and kind of spongey. A fucking disaster. </p><p>“What are ya talkin’ ‘bout, Poppy?” he asked. “The noodles are-“</p><p>“Just one part of it. Don’t think about that, take another bite,” she urged him. </p><p>He did. </p><p>This time he didn’t focus on the noodles, but the flavor, the texture of the vegetables, the tenderness of the beef. Hints of the garlic and ginger that he’d found so easily in the cabinet. </p><p>Tora’s eyebrows rose.</p><p>Fuck, it actually wasn’t bad. He hadn’t screwed it up after all.</p><p>“See?” she asked as she lifted another bite to her mouth. “I love it. Thank you.”</p><p>He smiled widely at her. “Anytime, sweetheart.”</p><p>They chatted about their days while they continued to pull at their ramen and when they were finished, Tora began to run water in the sink to clean up. </p><p>“Just what do you think you’re doing?” Poppy asked with her hands on her hips. </p><p>He blinked at her. “Doin’ the dishes, like I do every night.”</p><p>“Um, you cooked dinner. Go sit your cute butt down and relax. I’ll clean the dishes.”</p><p>Pfft. Always so feisty. </p><p>“No use in arguin’ with ya, is there?” he chuckled. </p><p>She shook her head and grinned. “Not at all.”</p><p>---</p><p>Later that night, after they’d played video games together and lounged on the couch, Poppy yawned and stretched beside him. </p><p>“I think I’m ready for bed.” She stood and held out a hand to him. “Are you coming?” she asked hopefully. </p><p>Tora ran his fingers through his hair. He hadn’t had any bad dreams for a couple of nights now, not since their talk. And Poppy trusted him, enough to eat the first dinner he’d ever made for her, enough to sleep beside her in their bed. </p><p>He could do this. </p><p>Tora looked up at her and smiled as he curled his hand around hers.</p><p>“Try’n stop me.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Callum</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Our favorite couple adopts a dog and it's not at all what Tora expects.</p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>HAPPY MPL DAY!!!!!</p><p>I thought I'd throw a fluffy one shot out there to make up for the first angsty one that I posted lol. I hope you guys get a kick out of it! I absolutely loved writing it for you. </p><p>I wanted to give a few people credit for this second chapter:<br/>S.Meiji for the suggestion of Tora and Poppy adopting a dog, BegoniaRex and my husband Travis for beta reading and<br/>my best friend, beta reader and fellow puppy gusher, Gaby. She's the one who made the suggestion for the breed Tora and Poppy end up with! </p><p>I'm still piecing together the outline for the next one shot, so it might be a bit before I'm ready to update again, but be assured it's coming! </p><p>Thank you all for reading and always being there &lt;3</p><p>Love you all and see you soon, </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Tonight I'll dream, while I’m in bed<br/>
When silly thoughts go through my head<br/>
About the bugs and alphabet<br/>
And when I wake tomorrow, I'll bet<br/>
That you and I will walk together again</p><p>I can tell that we are going to be friends<br/>
Yes, I can tell that we are going to be friends”<br/>
-The White Stripes, “We’re Going to Be Friends”</p><p>---</p><p>“What about this guy?” Poppy asked and pointed into the chain-linked kennel. </p><p>Tora looked into the cage at a large-sized dog hulking in the corner; he was short-haired and brown, had long drooping jowls and a pair of eyes that matched Tora’s, both in color and intensity. When he made eye contact with the brute, the dog bristled and the dark fur around his neck flared out.</p><p>Hmmpf. There was something about this particular canine that he didn’t trust. </p><p>Silvie, the young, blonde shelter volunteer who had been helping them, sidled up next to Poppy. “Oh, this is Maximus. He’s a Labrador-mastiff mix. We think he’s about seven years old, he’s only been here for a month and-“</p><p>Tora tuned her out as he quietly walked up to the kennel door and angled his body sideways, in a neutral position. As soon as Tora took a step in Maximus’ direction, the dog growled and charged at the door, barking aggressively. </p><p>Poppy jumped back and Silvie winced as she looked to his tiny girlfriend and then up at Tora. “Um, yeah, we think he was abused and not socialized properly when he was young.”</p><p>Tora frowned at this; he understood that anger and distrust all too well. It was what made good attack and guard dogs. And while he felt sorry for Maximus, shit, he felt sorry for <em>all</em> the mutts locked up in cages here, it wasn’t something Tora was too eager to revisit. </p><p>“Dunno ‘bout this one, sweetheart,” he said as he stepped back from the cage with his hands in his pockets. “He’d definitely keep us safe, but don’t think he’d be much of a cuddler. I know that’s somethin’ ya were hopin’ for.”</p><p>Poppy’s shoulders slumped as she gazed at the lab mastiff, who had retreated into the cage corner. “Yeah, you’re right,” she said sadly. “I just want to take them all home, you know?”</p><p>“I know you do. Ya got a big heart,” he told her as they followed Silvie down to the next kennel. “What’d ya think about Roman? He was a big guy and seemed sweet enough.”</p><p>Poppy scrunched her nose up at Tora. “Um, he was a little <em>too</em> sweet.”</p><p>Tora barked out a laugh as he thought back to their earlier encounter with the big, dopey Rottweiler. At Tora’s insistence, they’d taken him into a private room for a proper visit. He wanted a dog that looked intimidating but was also sweet and big enough to handle Poppy’s affection and his own roughhousing.</p><p>The Rottweiler had immediately bounded over to Tora and jumped happily at him, then made a beeline for Poppy. Roman knocked her down to the concrete floor, gripped her thigh and proceeded to enthusiastically hump her leg. </p><p>“Yeah, he really liked ya, Bobby. Can’t blame him.” Tora chuckled as she swatted playfully at his chest. </p><p>When they came to a stop in front of the next kennel door, Poppy let out a squeal. “Oh my gosh, Tora, <em>look!”</em></p><p>When Tora peered inside, he didn’t see a dog curled up in a bed but a damn teddy bear. Christ, was the little thing even real? Its fur was slightly wavy and the color of caramel. Two round dark eyes peered out from beneath a shock of hair and as the dog waddled toward them, Tora estimated it couldn’t be more than five or six pounds. </p><p>This wasn’t a damn dog; it was a fucking chicken nugget with legs. </p><p>Poppy immediately collapsed to the ground and poked her fingers through the chain links. The puppy eagerly licked and nipped at her hand and wagged its fluffy tail. Poppy looked up at Tora and laughed, then turned her attention back to the little rugrat. </p><p>Tora crossed his arms over his chest. </p><p>Oh, absolutely fucking not. </p><p>“This is Malcolm, he’s a three-month old Cavapoo. He also happens to be my favorite little guy here,” Silvie giggled as she watched him interact with Poppy. “If I didn’t already have three dogs, he would have come home with me.”</p><p>“Sorry, what did you say his name was? Callum?” his tiny girlfriend asked, completely transfixed on the puppy in front of her. </p><p>“Oh, it’s Malcolm,” Silvie said. “Martha, one of the other volunteers here, named him. But… I kind of like Callum better. You know it means ‘dove’?” </p><p><em>”Dove?</em> Oh, Callum is perfect for a little dove like you,” Poppy cooed at the pup. </p><p>Poppy looked up pointedly at Tora and he rolled his eyes. She was <em>not</em> already naming the damn thing.</p><p>“Poppylan, we agreed we wanted a dog that could keep us safe. That thing couldn’t fight a damn <em>mouse</em> off-“ </p><p>“How did he even end up here?” Poppy cut him off, turning to Silvie. </p><p>“Well, we found him on the street, just a few blocks away,” the blonde woman explained. “No tags or collar, no chip. We don’t know for <em>sure</em> where he came from, but Martha believes the previous owners were friends of her neighbor. They think he was a Christmas puppy they got annoyed with and just dumped him on the side of the road.”</p><p>“How can people be so fudging cruel?” Poppy gasped again and gazed up at Tora, her eyes wide. </p><p>Tora’s eyebrows lifted to his forehead. People actually did that shit? Brought a puppy into their home and then just kicked it to the curb when they got tired of it?</p><p>He briefly found himself wondering how long this puppy had been on the streets, looking for its family and fending for itself.</p><p>He remembered those days all too well. </p><p>“Tora, can we-“</p><p>“No. Absolutely not,” he told her. “We agreed on a big dog-“</p><p>“But can’t we take him into the visiting room?” she begged. “Just to give him a break from this cage he’s in?”</p><p>
  <em>Somebody please let me out soon. I wanna go to the beach too…</em>
</p><p>Tora sighed deeply. </p><p>“Fine, Bobby. But we’re not takin’ him home.”</p><p>Ten minutes later they were sitting across from each other in the tiny visiting room. Tora leaned back into his chair as he watched Poppy play with the pup on her lap. It’s little tail just didn’t stop <em>moving</em>, it yipped and it bit at her fingers like they were damn snacks. </p><p>Christ, he hated it. </p><p>A few moments later, the pup curled up on Poppy’s thighs. As she ran her palms over its fur, its dark eyes grew heavy and then closed completely. </p><p>Hmmpf. Little shit was comfortable enough to pass out with his girlfriend’s hands in its hair. Tora knew <em>that</em> feeling, too. </p><p>Poppy angled her head to peer down at the pup. “Did he fall asleep?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Tora said as he eyed the little hairball on her lap. “Ya ready to go? Silvie said there’s still another row of dogs we haven’t seen yet.”</p><p>“I don’t think I <em>need</em> to see them,” Poppy murmured, her eyes brimming with tears. “I just feel like Callum… belongs with us. I want <em>him,</em> Tora.”</p><p>Tora stood from the chair and once again crossed his arms over his chest. “Poppy, ya just want him ‘cuz he’s cute and small.” As those words left his mouth, he smirked internally at them. </p><p>The same could be said about him and his tiny girlfriend. </p><p>“That’s not true!” she protested quietly, so as to not wake the sleeping puppy. “I want to make sure he’s raised in a good home. If he’s with us, I know he’ll be.” She sniffled. </p><p>“What if he ends up with another family that just gets tired of him in three months because he chews or he’s not potty trained or…or-“</p><p>He sighed deeply. “Poppy-“</p><p>“He’s just a helpless little baby,” she whimpered. “I don’t want him to end up back on the streets. He <em>needs</em> us.”</p><p>Tora placed his hands on his hips and glared down at Poppy. Her forehead was creased with worry lines and a single tear worked its way down her cheek. </p><p>Shit. She really cared about this pup. If only someone like Poppy had been around when he was five years old. </p><p>Fuck.</p><p>“Fine. Fuckin’ <em>fine.</em> I’ll let Silvie know yer wantin’ to take this fluffy lil’ asshole home.”</p><p>Poppy’s face broke into a smile and she blinked at him with doe-eyed excitement. “Really?! Oh my gosh, thank you so much! I know he’ll be a good dog for us-“</p><p>“S’yer dog,” he told her. “Ain’t what I ordered.”</p><p>She laughed. “You’re going to learn to love him, you’ll see.”</p><p>“Hmmpf. Don’t hold ya breath, sweetheart.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>3.5 Months Old</strong>
</p><p>When Tora walked into their apartment two weeks later, he was pleasantly overwhelmed with the hearty smell of Poppy’s spaghetti. Aside from her animal rice balls, it was his favorite thing she made.</p><p>“Smells good, sweetheart,” he called out as he shrugged off his coat and hung it on the wall hook. It’d been a particularly long day at work and he was excited to sit down, fill his stomach with a homecooked meal and play some video games with Gyu and Avery. </p><p>“Oh, um, good,” Poppy hollered back. “I made it with extra beef this time and I bought that French bread you like so much to make garlic-“</p><p>Tora half-listened as he toed out of his new white shoes. When he glanced down, he noticed that his high-top black Converse were not sitting in their usual spot next to the welcome mat. </p><p>The hell?</p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched as he was hit with a heart-stopping realization. </p><p>
  <em>Fucking Christ, not again.</em>
</p><p>He stormed into the kitchen where Poppy was pouring noodles into a large pot of boiling water. “Where is he?” Tora asked through gritted teeth. </p><p>Poppy peered sheepishly at him over her shoulder. “Um, in the corner playing.” She pointed to a vacant spot near the pantry where a small, stuffed monkey lay. “Oh, shoot. At least he <em>was.</em> D- did you hear what I said about the garlic bread?” she asked and blinked her big eyes at him.  </p><p>“Oh, I heard ya all right,” Tora said. “That lil’ fucker ate my shoes <em>again</em> and you think ya can bribe me with my favorite dinner?”</p><p>Poppy cast her gaze back to the stove. “Um… nope.”</p><p>“Nice try, sweetheart. Now where the fuck is that <em>punk chicken?”</em> he growled.</p><p>“I honestly don’t know. He was right behind me and…”</p><p>Over the noise of the oven fan and boiling water, Tora heard the unmistakable sound of clattering coming from the other room. </p><p>Oh, that little shit was <em>dead.</em></p><p>He tore into the living room, knowing exactly where he’d find Callum. Halfway under the tv stand, ass and tail sticking straight in the air. </p><p>“Tora?” Poppy called out from somewhere behind him. </p><p>Tora dove toward the pup and scooped his hand beneath him. He pulled the little chicken out gently and removed the electrical cord he knew would be in Callum’s mouth. Once he’d freed it of the dog’s needle-like teeth, Tora plopped him onto his back on the wood floor. He pinned him down with one giant palm and used his other hand to point directly into the pup’s face. </p><p>“Listen up, you lil’ asshole,” he rumbled as Callum gazed up at him with his big, brown eyes. “Yer done eatin’ my kicks, ya understand me? If it weren’t fer that nice lady in there, I’d make a new pair of fluffy fuckin’ shoes outta ya.”</p><p>Callum lifted his ears and cocked his head at the large man above him. </p><p>“And as for chewin’ on these cords and wires, yer gonna hurt yourself, you lil’ idiot. Ya know what happens if you get hurt? That nice lady will be heartbroken and I’ll be <em>damned</em> if I’m gonna let you upset h-“</p><p>Tora’s eyes flickered down as he felt Callum’s tail wagging wildly against the side of his hand. </p><p>Pfft. </p><p>Goddamn little shit.</p><p>“Yer not takin’ me serious at all, are ya?” he asked the Cavapoo. Callum continued staring and his tail continued thumping against the hard wood floor.</p><p>Tora sighed and lifted his hand from the dog’s belly. “Go on, punk. Get outta here.”</p><p>Poppy giggled from beside the couch as Callum clumsily made his way over to her. She scooped him up in her arms and planted a kiss on top of his head. </p><p>“That big old tiger’s not so scary, is he?” she cooed at the pup. Then she turned to Tora. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t even hear him leave the room. I’ll be better about keeping an eye on him, I promise.”</p><p>“Just don’t want him gettin’ hurt,” Tora told her. His shoes and electrical cords could be replaced without batting an eye. That little dog couldn’t. </p><p>“I’ll figure out a way to mount those wires to the wall, get ‘em out of his reach.”</p><p>“And I’ll do some more research on how to keep him from chewing.” Poppy sighed as she pulled one of her braids from Callum’s mouth. “I read that puppies go through a teething stage like babies do, but I’m not sure what age that stops.”</p><p>“Great. Can’t wait for our kids ta be chewin’ on my fuckin’ shoes,” Tora murmured. </p><p>When he looked up, Poppy was gazing down at him with a small smile. </p><p><em>”Our</em> kids?” she breathed. “You… you want kids?”</p><p>Shit, he didn’t think he’d said it <em>that</em> loud.</p><p>Tora could feel heat rising to his cheeks. “Not if they’re anythin’ like that lil’ demon,” he said and pointed at the wiggly bundle of fluff and teeth in her arms. </p><p>Poppy giggled. “You like him, admit it.”</p><p>“Pfft. Not in a million years, sweetheart.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>5 Months Old</strong>
</p><p>“Bobby, ya seen my long-sleeved green shirt?” Tora called out to her from the bedroom. He’d already dug through both sides of the closet twice and it was nowhere to be found.</p><p>“I will only tell you if you refer to it by its proper name,” she shouted back from the living room. </p><p>God damnit. </p><p>“Christ woman, are ya <em>ever</em> goin’ to let that go?”</p><p>“Never!”</p><p>He smirked. “Fine. Have ya seen my goddamn sexy strip teaser shirt?”</p><p>If there was one thing he ever hoped to live down, it would be the moment he whipped off that stupid shirt in the middle of Quincey’s party. </p><p>Poppy cackled from the other room. “Much better! The last time I saw it, it was in the dirty clothes. In the mesh hamper.”</p><p>That’s right. He’d worn it on his jog the other day. </p><p>Tora stripped out of his guard uniform and into a pair of gray sweatpants. He slipped on a black tank top instead, picked up his work clothes and headed toward the bathroom. As he flicked on the light to dump his clothes in the hamper, he saw that it was toppled over on its side and what few garments were in it were now strewn across the tiled floor. </p><p>That little fucking <em>punk.</em></p><p>As he righted the hamper and stooped to pick up the assaulted clothes, he realized his favorite green shirt was not among them. </p><p>Tora made his way downstairs and crossed his arms at Poppy who was perched on the couch with her nose buried in a book. </p><p>“Where’s the boy?” he asked her. </p><p>She looked up at him, her big brown eyes barely peeking over the pages. “Why? What did he do this time?”</p><p>“S’got somethin’ that belongs ta me.”</p><p>“Well, I’m sure if you ask him nicely, he’ll tell you right where it is,” she giggled. </p><p>Tora continued staring at her, saying nothing.</p><p>“He’s in his kennel taking a nap.”</p><p>Tora made his way over to the kennel in the corner of the room. Sure enough Callum was curled up in a stupid, little ball on his dinosaur blanket. Poking out from under Callum’s wavy golden fur was a piece of green fabric. </p><p>“I knew it, I fuckin’ <em>knew</em> it,” Tora said as he stooped down and carefully lifted the little chicken out of the cage. He reached in and yanked his shirt from Callum’s makeshift nest. </p><p>“God damnit, why does he keep doin’ this?” Tora growled as he shook it out. “The rate he’s goin’, I’m gonna be naked.”</p><p>“Like that’s such a bad thing?” Poppy said and giggled again when Tora rolled his eyes at her. “Oh, come on. He likes how you smell. Your clothes remind him of you, so he wants them close. It’s adorable if you ask me.”</p><p>Poppy laid her book down and called to Callum, who bounded over to her. “You’re so cute, Cal. And you know it, don’t you?” she asked as she lifted him from the floor onto her lap. “Stealing your dad’s clothes and-“</p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched. <em>”Ain’t</em> that thing’s dad,” he said. </p><p>As Poppy continued to babble to the gremlin, Tora threw another glance into the kennel. Probably had more of his shit buried in there. He was pulling out the blanket and dog bed when a flash of pink caught his eye. </p><p>
  <em>No.</em>
</p><p>“God damnit!” Tora shouted and plucked a lacy pair of Poppy’s underwear from the kennel floor. They were stretched out and frayed from where they’d been chewed. </p><p>Fucking panty raiding little piece of shit.</p><p>“Ugh, I wondered where those went,” Poppy said as she scratched the little criminal right between his ears. “That’s the first time he’s done that. I guess we’ll have to keep the bathroom door closed from now on.”</p><p>“Fuck, Poppy, I <em>liked</em> these,” Tora groaned and threw them on the floor. </p><p>“Oh, please. Like <em>you’ve</em> never ripped a pair of my underwear in your life.”</p><p>“S’different,” he grumbled to himself.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>8 Months Old</strong>
</p><p>Friday night, Poppy mentioned she had a craving for chocolate milk and donuts and while Tora didn’t really do anything with sugar, he’d do anything for her. </p><p>Saturday morning, after he snuck out to buy her a nauseatingly sweet breakfast, he walked into the apartment and was greeted by an excited, barking bundle of golden fur. </p><p>“’Sup, punk,” Tora smiled at Callum as he slipped off his shoes. </p><p>They were getting along better now that the chicken had stopped gnawing on Tora’s shoes, but more than that, Callum had taken to barking and rushing to the door any time they had a visitor. While he wouldn’t intimidate anyone who stepped over the threshold, Tora appreciated the dog’s newfound habit of alerting them. </p><p>He’d also barked when Tora had tested the carbon monoxide alarm last week. At first, Poppy attempted to calm and quiet him, but Tora thought it was better not to. “What if we’re asleep and don’t hear it go off?” he asked her. “Think the boy is on ta somethin’.” Tora set it off a couple more times and they immediately praised him as he barked and shrieked at the shrill sound. </p><p><em>Finally</em> the dog was doing something aside from destroying shit and hogging his clothes. </p><p>With Callum hot on his heels, Tora made his way into the kitchen where Poppy was on a video call with Quincey. When she turned and saw Tora, her face broke into a bright smile. </p><p>“There you are! Where did you take off to?” she asked as she tilted her head up for a kiss. </p><p>Tora lowered his head and quickly pressed his lips to hers, painfully aware that Quincey was watching. </p><p>“Got ya breakfast,” he told her and held up the grocery bag. </p><p>She peered inside and squealed as she pulled out the box of donuts and half gallon of chocolate milk. “Whoa, thank you so much! Here, talk to your brother while I get plates and napkins.”</p><p>Before Tora could object, Poppy passed him her phone and began rummaging through cabinets. </p><p>“Morning, booboo!” Quincey chirped and fluttered his eyelashes at him. “Do I get a smooch, too?”</p><p>“Christ sakes, it’s too early for this shit,” he said but couldn’t help the smirk that stretched across his face. Now that they lived a couple of hours away from his brother, Tora missed seeing him.</p><p>“It’s never too early for looooove,” Quincey sang out. “So tell me everything. How’s work? How’s life as a fur dad? Poppy had Callum on with me earlier and my nephew is the cutest thing I’ve <em>ever</em> se-“</p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched. “Ain’t the punk chicken’s dad,” he grit out. “Poppy ain’t his mom and ya certainly ain’t his <em>uncle,</em> Quince.”</p><p>“Oh, Uncle Quince, I like it!” the blonde man laughed. “And you keep telling yourself that, Tiger Boy. Pops was just saying how protective you are of him…”</p><p>“Just tryin’ ta keep him alive, princess. Same as when I was workin’ for ya,” Tora said as he felt heat rising to his cheeks. </p><p>But… it was more than that, wasn’t it? He wanted to keep Quincey safe because he cared about his brother. And the little dog wasn’t the <em>worst</em> thing that ever happened to him…</p><p>“Mmmhmm, I’m sure that’s all it is. Put Poppy back on the phone, will you? I forgot what a grumpy tiger you are in the mornings,” Quincey smirked. </p><p>“Gladly,” Tora shot back and then asked, “We’re still on for visitin’ you next weekend, right?”</p><p>“As long as you bring my little nephew. I have gifts for him!”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes. Of <em>course</em> he did.</p><p><em>”Fine,”</em> he bit out and handed the phone back to Poppy, who was balancing a sprinkled donut on a plate. </p><p>“I’m gonna go for a quick run before it gets too hot out,” Tora said and gave her bottom a squeeze as he moved past her. </p><p>“Oh my gosh, Tora!” she jumped and blushed as Quincey cackled away on the phone. “Um, why don’t you take Callum with you?” she asked as she collected herself. “Burn off some of that puppy energy.”</p><p>Tora groaned. That would demote his morning run to a <em>walk</em> or a slight jog at best. Plus, the little shit attracted even more unwanted attention. Callum was a chick magnet and Tora <em>hated</em> it.</p><p>“It’s been awhile since you’ve taken him,” Poppy pressed. “Come on, you know he loves it.”</p><p>God damnit. </p><p><em>”Fine,”</em> he bit out again. “Get him hooked up in his harness and I’ll take him.”</p><p>“Okay!” she exclaimed and ran to collect the dog. “Cal, wanna go for walkies with your dad?”</p><p>“Ain’t his dad!” Tora yelled after her.</p><p>---</p><p>“C’mon, let’s keep movin’,” Tora gruffed at the leashed chicken. “Ya don’t have to sniff and piss on every lil’ thing we pass.”</p><p>Callum trotted happily at Tora’s heels for a couple of feet and then stopped to inspect a leaf on the gravel trail. </p><p>Tora sighed. </p><p>Fucking Christ. </p><p>He’d taken him to Tora’s favorite park; it was equipped with a playground, but also ball fields and a tree-lined walking trail that wound around the backside of the soccer fields. </p><p>The trail was utilized heavily by the local high school’s cross country team and the board had paid for the construction of wooden balance beams and hurdles; they dotted the trail every few hundred feet or so and sometimes Tora used them when he was in the mood for a more strenuous cardio workout. </p><p>They were slowly approaching a row of low-set balance beams; the tops of them barely reached eight inches off the ground. Callum was big enough now, maybe he could train him to leap over them. </p><p>“Let’s bulk you up a lil’ bit, punk chicken,” Tora said to his furry companion and led him over to the wood planks. Tora stooped to get the dog’s attention and Callum pranced over to him. </p><p>Tora tapped at the top of the first board. “Come here, check it out.” Callum sniffed at the plank, then Tora’s hand and licked his fingers. </p><p>He sighed. </p><p>This might take awhile. </p><p>A few minutes later, Callum <em>finally</em> had both of his front feet perched on the board. </p><p>“Good boy, come on. Just fuckin’ jump over it,” Tora said and tugged gently at the leash to urge him forward. </p><p>Callum pulled his back feet up and propelled himself forward over the board, landing on the soft ground. </p><p>
  <em>”Yes,</em> good boy! C’mon, do the next one,” Tora pointed at the second wood plank that stood just a couple of feet from the first. 
</p><p>
Callum inspected it heavily and then ducked under it.
</p><p>
“Seriously? God damnit, ya just did it. Come out from under there.”
</p><p>
As Tora stooped to collect the dog from the ground, Callum bolted forward and dove under the remaining five balance beams. Tora wasn’t expecting it and as the dog tugged further under the boards, the leash slipped from his hand.
</p><p>
Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.
</p><p>
Tora stood to his full height quickly and readied himself to take off in a full-on sprint after him. When he spun around, Callum was sitting on the ground beside the last beam, gazing up at Tora with a cocked head as if to say, <em>”You presented me with a problem and I solved it.”</em>
</p><p>
Smart ass little dog.
</p><p>
Tora chuckled as he trotted over to the chicken and picked up the leash. “Ya lil’ shit, you scared the hell outta me.”
</p><p>
“Oh my god, is that your dog?” a feminine voice squealed from behind him.
</p><p>
Tora rolled his eyes.
</p><p>
When women approached him walking Callum, it was seemingly because they wanted to pet the little hairball at the end of the leash; after a few minutes though, they made their true intentions known by asking for his number or running their hand along his arm.
</p><p>
Some backed down more easily than others; usually all he had to do was mention Poppy and they would say something like, “Well, your girlfriend has good taste,” before walking away from him.
</p><p>
Others were not put off at the mention of his committed relationship and wouldn’t stop until he gave them his number. He would punch the number of the diner into their phones and send them on their way.
</p><p>
His jaw clenched. Tora wasn’t certain yet how this encounter was going to play out.
</p><p>
“S’my girlfriend’s,” he grit out at the young woman as she sidled up next to him.
</p><p>
“She’s so cute!” she cried. “Can I pet her?”
</p><p>
“Ya can pet <em>him,”</em> Tora replied.
</p><p>
“Oh. Okay, him.”
</p><p>
The blonde stooped down and ran her fingers over Callum’s curls; the dog sniffed furiously at her hands and licked at her. The woman giggled.
</p><p>
“He must smell my dogs,” she told Tora as she gazed at him over her shoulder. “My husband and I have two male Huskies.”
</p><p>
Cool. She had a husband. Maybe she really <em>did</em> just want to pet Callum.
</p><p>
Tora nodded as she continued to play with the chicken.
</p><p>
“So… girlfriend, huh?” the woman asked after a moment and flipped her hair back. “Is it serious?”
</p><p>
He scoffed at her.
</p><p>
 Jesus Christ.
</p><p>
“More serious than yer marriage, apparently,” Tora ground out.
</p><p>
The woman chuckled at him and stood. “How boring. Why don’t you give me your number? I can show you a fun time and you can take a break from your <em>serious</em> girlfriend...”
</p><p>
Tora shook his head. “No thanks. Best you keep walkin’.”
</p><p>
“Oh, come on. Just give me your number,” the woman insisted and Tora watched as Callum sniffed madly at her shoes. Probably smelled her male dogs on them, which meant he just might…
</p><p>
“I told ya no. Now <em>go.”</em>
</p><p>
Callum hiked his leg up and Tora grinned.
</p><p>
Before the blonde woman could say another word, Callum got into position and pissed all over one of her Nike shoes.
</p><p>
Tora barked with laughter as the woman shrieked and violently shook her foot.
</p><p>
“You think this is <em>funny?”</em> the woman screamed at him.
</p><p>
“Fuckin’ hilarious,” Tora managed to choke out.
</p><p>
She huffed in disbelief and spat a few more choice words at Tora before turning and stomping down the opposite side of the trail.
</p><p>
When Tora’s breath returned, he crouched to the ground and gestured for Callum, who hustled over to him, tail wagging wildly.
</p><p>
“Good job, buddy,” Tora chuckled and held his hands palm-facing out in front of him. “High five.”
</p><p>
Just as Poppy had trained him, Callum jumped up on his hind legs and clapped his front paws against Tora’s palms.
</p><p>
---
</p><p>
<strong>1 Year Old</strong>
</p><p>
Sunday evening, Poppy went to bed around 6:30 with a migraine and had taken Callum with her. After Tora made sure she was tucked in and had everything she needed, he walked back downstairs, unsure what to do with himself.
</p><p>
He wasn’t used to having quiet evenings alone and he didn't know if he liked it or not.
</p><p>
He decided to toss together a big chef salad for dinner; he made sure to load it up with extra ham and turkey before grabbing a can of strawberry juice and carrying it all into the living room.
</p><p>
He set his dinner up on a tv tray and clicked through some titles on Netflix before finally settling on a thriller that Poppy refused to watch; “too creepy,” in her little hamster opinion.
</p><p>
About five minutes into the movie, Tora heard scratching at the bedroom door upstairs. Probably the boy needing to go outside.
</p><p>
Tora walked up the stairs and down the hall, where he cracked the door open. Callum gazed up at him, his wagging tail a blur behind him.
</p><p>
“C’mon, let her sleep,” he whispered. “I’ll take ya outside.”
</p><p>
At the sound of his favorite word, Callum bolted out the door and down the hall. Tora led him around the yard in front of their building and after he’d done his business, he brought him back in. No sooner had he let him off the leash, the chicken made a beeline for the couch.
</p><p>
“Ahhh, get away from my food, ya lil’ shit,” Tora said sternly and sat down on the cushion beside Callum. “Don’tcha wanna go cuddle with Poppy? Ya’d probably make her feel better.”
</p><p>
The dog responded by circling a couple of times and then plopping himself down beside Tora, pressing hard against his hip.
</p><p>
Tora chuckled. “Fine. Boy’s night, I get it.”
</p><p>
He picked up his fork and resumed eating his salad. A soft whine came from Tora’s side and he glanced down at the dog, who was staring at him expectantly.
</p><p>
“Y’know she doesn’t like ya to have table scraps,” Tora told him. “Yer tryin’ ta get me in trouble.”
</p><p>
Callum glanced up at his face as he spoke and then back to the lunchmeat on Tora’s fork.
</p><p>
He sighed. “Christ, Cal. Fine.”
</p><p>
He picked up a piece of diced ham and passed it to Callum, who chomped on it happily.
</p><p>
Tora chuckled. “Yer as bad as Poppy, you know that? I can’t fuckin’ say no to ya.”
</p><p>
He reasoned it was probably why he liked the little guy so much.
</p><p>
He ate the rest of his salad, making sure to leave a small pile of ham and turkey bits for Cal. Tora leaned back into the cushions and Callum took the opportunity to hop up and splay himself across Tora’s thighs.
</p><p>
“Pfft. Sure, make yerself at home,” Tora said and ran his fingers through Cal’s soft, thick fur. He continued to hand him pieces of lunchmeat and smiled as the dog accepted them eagerly.
</p><p>
“Eat up while ya can,” Tora told him. “Just don’t tell yer mom.”
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Contains chapter spoiler: </p><p>Biggest shout out goes to my eight year old beagle/dachshund mix, Bentley. Callum's behavior is heavily inspired by the shenanigans my dog has gotten into throughout all of our years together. The tv stand scene? Absolutely happened LOL. To this day, that dog thinks it's funny when I yell at him for getting into stuff, I swear. I wouldn't trade that little doofus for anything &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Collide - Part One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy is experiencing stress and finds relief in a way she doesn't expect. </p><p>Told from Poppy's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'M BACK! </p><p>Sorry for the gap in updates! This is my first time writing from Poppy's POV in over a month and I missed her SO. MUCH. Turns out our girl has LOTS to say, so I hope you don't mind this being a two-shot lol. </p><p>I wanted to give credit to a few people for this installment:</p><p>RaquelSousa, JFlorez0426, GeekGoddess and Foxesinboxes for their suggestions/comments regarding this particular scenario,<br/>BegoniaRex, my best friend Gaby and my husband Travis for beta-reading and offering their insight.</p><p>Also a big shoutout to Gaby for the song choice; she is a lyrical wizard! </p><p>I'm hoping to have the next chapter up tomorrow or Saturday at the latest! </p><p>As always, thank you all for reading and being here; enjoy!</p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Floating on the water, ever changing picture<br/>
Hours out from land<br/>
In tune with all our dreams”<br/>
-Deftones, “Sextape”</p><p>---</p><p>“I apologize for the misunderstanding, Mr. Kondo,” Poppy said into the phone she had balanced between her neck and shoulder. “I didn’t mean that particular passage needed to be omitted completely; I just believe that it would help the chapter flow better if it was moved to the beginning. It contains quite a bit of details that would foreshadow upcoming-“</p><p>She sighed internally as her most recent client cut her off again. Initially, she had been excited to work with Michael Kondo. He was a new name in the world of romance novelists but showed great promise and determination. </p><p>Over the weeks Poppy had collaborated with him, he also showed his true colors. </p><p>He was easily offended and overly sensitive, to a point where he requested Poppy use an ink other than red to make notes on his manuscripts; according to him, red “made him angry.” It seemed a myriad of other things made him angry as well, including Poppy’s general advice and feedback as an editor.</p><p>A minor suggestion she’d made about the order of his paragraphs had turned into <em>this,</em> Mr. Kondo yelling at her as she hovered over the stove to prepare dinner for herself and her fiancé. </p><p><em>Oh, go back to self-publishing your fudging e-books on Amazon!</em> she wanted to scream at him, but instead took a deep, quiet breath and slowly released it. If her history of phone calls with her latest client told her anything, it was that he would rant for another minute, threaten to find another publisher and then hang up on her. </p><p>By this time next week, he would have forgotten this conversation and would speak to her respectfully until she inevitably said or did something else to set him off. </p><p>And people said <em>Quincey</em> had diva issues. </p><p>Poppy smiled to herself as her thoughts turned to the man who would soon be her brother-in-law. After the raging success of his pirate romance novel, he’d immediately called her with an “Okay, honey, what’s next?” </p><p>A few weeks after, she’d received an email from a business investor named Mr. Lam, who wished to recruit Q. B. Noyouko to finish the novel his wife had begun before she lost her battle with cancer. Poppy in particular had been incredibly moved by this proposal and after several meetings and late-night brainstorming sessions with Quincey, the contract had been signed and the project was underway. </p><p>Quincey had also recruited himself as Poppy’s wedding planner, which both excited her and made her nervous. Excited because this meant that the days until she could call Tora her husband were becoming fewer and fewer and nervous because with Quincey in charge, you never knew what you were going to get. </p><p>“I’m going to call Guildhouse Publishing today,” Mr. Kondo barked at her, drawing Poppy from her thoughts. “I’ll get someone on the damn phone who actually listens to me and knows what they’re doing.”</p><p>With a click, the line went dead. </p><p>Poppy sighed as she set her phone on the countertop. She really wished Mr. Kondo would make good on that threat one day.</p><p>Over the next several minutes, as Poppy stirred spaghetti sauce in her favorite flowery pot, a succession of text messages came through her phone, dinging rapid fire, one after another. </p><p>She closed her eyes and sighed again before setting down the wooden spoon and opening each of the messages in the order that she received them. </p><p>The first was from Quincey; it contained a photo of him with a giant angel sculpture carved completely from ice. He was gazing up at the angel’s face lovingly and puckering his lips at her. </p><p>
  <em>What do you think of her honey? I think she’ll be perfect as the centerpiece for the chocolate and cheese fondue station at the reception :) xoxo</em>
</p><p>Poppy scrunched her nose. Did he forget that they were having a beach wedding? In the middle of June?</p><p><em>I don’t know about that, Quincey,</em> she typed. <em>Won’t she melt all over?</em></p><p>The second was from Gil, asking if Mr. Kondo had behaved himself during Poppy’s call with him that day. She typed out a quick text relaying the short-lived conversation she’d had with her client and assured him it was nothing she couldn’t handle. </p><p>The third text was from an unknown number. </p><p>
  <em>Hey Pops, I thought I saw you at a bar in Moonbright last weekend. I wanted to buy you a beer, but you ran away from me before I could :P</em>
</p><p>Hmm. It definitely wasn’t her; she’d been with Tora all weekend and they generally didn’t hang out in bars. They preferred quiet cafes with board games, taking Callum for walks and hiking the trails that wound along Kintsugi Beach. </p><p><em>Not me!</em> she replied. <em>I’m sorry, but who is this? I don’t have your number saved in my phone.</em></p><p>She received a text back from the unknown number almost instantly. </p><p>
  <em>Wow, that hurts. It’s Julri.</em>
</p><p>Something clenched painfully in Poppy’s chest and she dropped the phone on the counter as if it burned her. </p><p>Why on earth was he reaching out to her? After all this time, she hadn’t given him a second thought and now here he was, <em>forcing</em> her to. She hated the idea that his number was even sitting in her phone right now; it was too close, tearing a hole in the life she had built with Tora.</p><p>At this thought, Poppy plucked the phone from the counter and deleted the conversation thread. As much as she didn’t want to, she would tell Tora about it when he got home from work. </p><p>She’d learned once already that no good came from keeping secrets from each other. </p><p>As she slid her phone into her back pocket, it dinged again, alerting her to two new messages. She would check them later. Right now, she didn’t have the mental bandwidth to continue with <em>any</em> of those conversations. </p><p>A few moments went by and just as Poppy had dumped the spaghetti noodles into a pot of boiling water, she heard the gentle <em>click clack</em> of doggy nails on the tiled floor.</p><p> “Over here, Callie!” she called for him and laughed when one side of his sweet face appeared around the kitchen island. “What are you doing, silly boy? Are you excited for your dad to get h-“</p><p>She stopped as Callum trotted over to her, a pair of her chewed up underwear swaying in his mouth. They were her favorite ones, black and lacy. They made her feel sexy, confident and she knew Tora loved how she looked in them. </p><p>And now they were ruined, all because she’d forgotten to close the bathroom door where they kept the dirty clothes hamper. </p><p><em>”Great,”</em> she moaned. “Thank you so much for that. Can I have those, please?” She pulled her panties from the Cavapoo’s mouth and lobbed them into the trash. </p><p>Poppy buried her face in her hands and sighed. Good <em>grief,</em> it had been a long day and all she wanted to do was eat dinner with Tora and then snuggle on the couch. Maybe they could make out a little while some movie they’d seen dozens of times played quietly in the background. </p><p>It sounded so… <em>nice.</em> Relaxing.</p><p>Poppy planned their quiet evening in her head as she turned the sauce down to a simmer and strained the noodles. Moments later, Tora walked in from work and at the sound of the door unlocking, Callum skittered across the kitchen floor and into the other room, where he barked enthusiastically. </p><p>“Hey, Pops!” Tora called out to her from the living room and then greeted Callum with a “I see ya, punk chicken. How was yer day, boy?”</p><p>“Oh, <em>his</em> day was great,” Poppy called out and rolled her eyes. “I forgot to close the bathroom door, so he had an afternoon snack in the form of my underwear.”</p><p>Tora grumbled as he moved into the kitchen, Callum trailing after him. “Little shit,” he said. “How many pairs does that make now?”</p><p>“Umm, three this month?” </p><p>“Hmmpf. Well, at this rate, ya might as well just stop wearin’ ‘em,” Tora said and smirked at her. “I know I won’t mind.”</p><p>Poppy blushed and swatted playfully at him as he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. “Of course you wouldn’t, you old perv.”</p><p>Tora planted a kiss on top of her head before moving to the cabinet beside her. He brought down two plates and out of the corner of her eye, she saw him staring at her. </p><p>“What?” she asked. </p><p>“Ya got that look,” Tora told her and propped himself against the counter. “When yer worried about somethin’, ya get these lines between your eyebrows.” He leaned over and gently tapped the area in question. “What’s wrong?”</p><p>Poppy blew a piece of hair out of her eyes. Sometimes she hated how perceptive her fiancé was; over the course of their relationship, it had become increasingly difficult to pretend things away when she wanted to. And while she had planned on telling him about Julri, she didn’t necessarily feel like it right <em>now.</em> </p><p>Not after the day she’d had. </p><p>She sighed. “It’s nothing, really. I just had kind of a crazy afternoon and… you remember Julri? My ex?”</p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched. “Mmmhmm.”</p><p>“Well, he texted me today out of <em>nowhere</em> and it just really threw me off.”</p><p>For a moment, Tora said nothing and the longer the silence stretched out between them, the more Poppy’s stomach curled in on itself.</p><p>“What’d he say?” he finally asked.</p><p>“At first, I didn’t know it was him. I don’t have his number saved. He thought he saw me at a bar in Moonbright last weekend and I told him it wasn’t me. When I asked the person who they were, he said it was Julri and I immediately stopped texting him.”</p><p>Tora was quiet for another moment. “Do ya still have the number he texted ya from?”</p><p>“Um, no,” she replied. “I hated how it even <em>looked</em> in my phone, so I deleted the messages.”</p><p>He nodded slowly. “Well, if he texts ya again, we’ll block his number, okay?” He turned his back on her then and began retrieving forks from the utensil drawer. </p><p>Poppy blinked. That was it? </p><p>“So… you’re not mad?” she asked him slowly. </p><p>Tora turned his head to look at her. “At you?”</p><p>She bit her lip. “Well… yeah.”</p><p>Julri would have been.</p><p>Ugh, why was she even having thoughts like <em>that?</em> Hearing from him after all this time must have rattled her more than she realized. That, combined with the verbal beating she’d taken from Mr. Kondo, had left her flustered and doubting things she shouldn’t. </p><p>Gosh, she couldn’t <em>wait</em> to cuddle up with Tora on the couch. She really needed it.</p><p>“Why would I be mad at ya?” Tora asked. “S’not yer fault. I’m angry with <em>him,</em> for reachin’ out and upsettin’ ya, but that’s it.”</p><p>Of <em>course</em> that was it. Tora wasn’t Julri. </p><p>He was better.</p><p>---</p><p>After dinner, Tora cleaned the dishes and Poppy sunk into their plushy couch with a book. Just a few more minutes and she would be pressed against his large, warm body, his arms would be wrapped around her and she could forget the outside world existed, if only for a little while. </p><p>A handful of moments later, Tora walked into the room and threw her a smile. She beamed up at him as she closed her book and set it to the side. She scoot across the cushions to make room for him and watched as he flipped on the tv. </p><p>Instead of then joining her on the sofa, he pulled his gaming chair up in front of the television and clicked on the Playstation. </p><p>Poppy’s heart sank as the voices of Gyu and Tora’s coworker Avery came over the speakers.</p><p>What the fudge was he doing? Why did he have to play tonight, of all nights? Gyu had one evening off during the week, so Wednesdays were the only days they played…</p><p>It <em>was</em> Wednesday. </p><p>Shoot.</p><p>She’d been so drained, so busy and stressed over planning their wedding, working with multiple clients and with Julri texting her, the anniversary of her father’s death coming up… she hadn’t even realized half the week had already passed her by. </p><p>Poppy’s lip trembled as this wave of realization and disappointment washed over her. She knew if she asked Tora to comfort her tonight, he would. He’d hop right off that game and hold her tight, for as long as she needed. </p><p>But just as she’d been looking forward to relaxing with him, he must have also been looking forward to playing games and chatting with his friends. Tora would never admit it out loud, but she knew he missed Gyu. </p><p>She missed her friends, too. </p><p>Poppy inhaled around a sob and stood from the couch, not wanting him to see her cry. She didn’t want to burden him with this right now. Not while he was enjoying himself.</p><p>As she moved across the floor to their bedroom, Tora called out to her. </p><p>“Everythin’ all right, Bobby?”</p><p>Fudging perceptive jerk. </p><p>She cleared her throat and didn’t turn around to face him; she knew she’d break down as soon as she took one look into his eyes. </p><p>“Um, yeah. I’m gonna go lay down,” she said lamely. “I have a bit of a headache… I think I’m just tired.”</p><p>“Okay, sweetheart. You need anythin’?”</p><p>“No, I’m- I’m fine. Have fun.”</p><p>As soon as she closed herself in their room, she shed her clothes and slipped into bed, where she cried quietly until she fell asleep.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Two and a Half Weeks Later</strong>
</p><p>Saturday morning, Poppy laid on her right side in their bed and was roused awake by Tora’s hand between her legs. </p><p>She hummed quietly as the fogginess of sleep left her and was replaced by ripples of pleasure as he rubbed at her over her underwear. </p><p>His fingers toyed at the waistband of her panties as he pressed hot kisses to the pale column of her throat. “I wanna have lazy mornin’ sex,” he rasped into her ear. </p><p>She nodded breathlessly and with a low rumble, he tugged her underwear down her legs and then curled his hand over her waist to trail his fingertips against her damp slit. He teased at her until she began to squirm and then he dipped one finger inside of her.</p><p>Poppy cried out at the feeling; it had been too long since they’d done this. In fact, if she thought about it, it had been three weeks today since they’d last had sex, which was so <em>unusual</em> for them. </p><p>Between the stress of the wedding, working and Tora struggling in his therapy sessions, she’d been so worried, panicked, her edges frayed, that by the end of the day, she was drained of any and all energy. </p><p>Several times over the past few weeks, right after dinner, she’d collapse into a heavy sleep on the couch, only waking when Tora gently touched her and urged her to come to bed with him. In that time, he never pushed her for sex or blamed her for the fact that they weren’t having any. </p><p>This was the first time he’d been forward with her in three weeks and she was grateful; they both needed it. </p><p>Tora slipped a second finger inside her and she moaned as she arched into the warm, brick wall that was his upper body. He kissed and nipped at her shoulder, the place where it met her neck, her throat, the shell of her ear. She rocked her hips back into his, where she could feel his erection nudging into her lower back. </p><p>Spurred on by her movements, he growled and pumped his hand feverishly in and out of her until she was panting for breath. </p><p><em>”Please,”</em> she gasped. </p><p>Tora quickly withdrew his fingers and then she felt the head of his cock lining up with her center. He pushed into her with ease and they both cried out at the sensation of being joined again. </p><p>It had been <em>too</em> long. </p><p>Tora gripped at her hip as he began thrusting into her from behind and Poppy groaned; it felt so good to be full of him. He continued to pump into her, building a wild, frantic rhythm and his hand traced over the curves of her side and then gripped her shoulder. He pulled her upper body into him and lowered his mouth to her ear. </p><p>“You feel so good,” he moaned. <em>”Fuck,</em> I missed ya, Bobby.”</p><p>In the moment, her throat was too busy humming and moaning to form words, but she’d been longing for this too. Desperately. She’d missed the closeness, connection and comfort that only his body could provide. </p><p>She <em>missed</em> him, missed <em>this.</em></p><p>Between the constant wedding emails to Quincey, the work meetings…</p><p>Shoot. Did she have a meeting today? No, no, that was Monday afternoon. This was only Saturday. </p><p>
  <em>Get your head on straight, Pops. Don’t let the days blur together on you.</em>
</p><p>So what <em>did</em> she have to do today? Answer a few emails, call Quincey and try to talk him out of the ice sculpture for the hundredth time, take Callum for a walk, catch up on some laundry and head to the store to buy groceries for dinner. Or maybe they could just order in tonight; she was so <em>tired</em> of running around and didn’t really want to-</p><p>Suddenly, the pleasant pressure between her legs eased and Tora’s tentative voice was in her ear, practically a whisper. “Um, Poppy? Are you enjoyin’ this?” he asked. </p><p>Huh? When <em>didn’t</em> she? </p><p>“Um, yes? I missed this too,” she assured him. “Why?”</p><p>“Well, uh, ya dried up on me,” he said and raked a hand through his hair. “I didn’t hurt ya, did I?”</p><p><em>What?</em> </p><p>That had never happened before. </p><p>“No, you didn’t hurt me. Are you su-“ Her words died in her throat as he began to remove himself from her; she could feel it, the chafing dryness, the resistance, even as he pulled out. </p><p>Her eyes widened and tears immediately filled them.  </p><p>
  <em>What was wrong with her?</em>
</p><p>“I- I’m sorry,” she croaked out. “I don’t know what happened. I <em>was</em> enjoying it and then… I- I just don’t know.” </p><p>It wasn’t his fault; he’d done everything right and she was as attracted to him as the day she met him. No, this was <em>her</em> fault, her and her stupid body that couldn’t just do what it was supposed to do. It could <em>worry,</em> it could panic, it could cry perfectly fine. But it couldn’t keep her wet enough to enjoy sex with the man she loved. </p><p>Right now, in this moment, she’d never felt more like a failure or less like a woman in her life.</p><p>“Don’t be sorry, sweetheart, s’okay,” he told her and as he placed his hand back on her shoulder to angle her body towards him, she began to sob. </p><p>“It’s not, it’s <em>not</em> okay,” she sputtered and cried hard into his bare chest. “I’m not okay. I can’t do this and I should be able to! Why? <em>Why</em> can’t I do this?”</p><p>“’Cuz yer already doin’ too much,” Tora murmured and squeezed her into a hug. “Here, roll over on yer stomach.”</p><p>Poppy sniffled and laid still against him for a moment before finally turning over. Once she was settled on her belly, she felt the mattress dip and shift as Tora pushed himself up to straddle her hips.</p><p>“What are you-“ she began to ask, lifting her head to turn around and look at him, but Tora promptly cut her off. </p><p>“Head down, Bobby,” he told her. “Just relax.”</p><p>Poppy crossed her arms beneath her pillow and laid her head down on it. A moment later, she felt Tora’s large hands splay across her shoulder blades and she sighed contentedly as he began to knead them with his fingers and then his knuckles.</p><p>Whoever was responsible for sending this god of a man to her… she wanted to bake them a fudging pie. </p><p>Poppy’s eyes slipped closed as Tora’s fingers continued their ministrations over the expanse of her back and shoulders. They eventually found a tight, bumpy knot just below the base of her neck and massaged at it gently. </p><p>She grimaced as he applied more pressure to it. Tora must have sensed her tense up, as he paused for a moment and said, “Sorry, Bobby. I’m tryin’ ta work this knot out. It might be a lil’ painful when it breaks up, but you’ll feel better afterwards, promise.”</p><p>After several seconds, there was an uncomfortable <em>pop</em> and release as the knot broke under her skin. She sighed as his fingers moved to rub the muscles around it. He was right, it <em>did</em> feel better.</p><p>“I hate seein’ ya so stressed out, sweetheart,” he murmured as his hands continued to skim over her. “You got a lot goin’ on and it’s startin’ ta catch up with ya. Why don’tcha take today and do somethin’ that you wanna do?”</p><p>“Like what?” she mumbled. It sounded nice, but not realistic at the moment. There were too many errands, too many-</p><p>“I dunno, whatever girly shit ya like,” Tora chuckled. “Go into the city and get ya nails done or go shopping for books or art supplies. Visit that new bakery… ”</p><p>“I wish I could,” she sighed. “But I have to call Quincey, walk Callum, do laundry, go get groceries…”</p><p>“All shit I can handle,” he told her. “’Sides, if ya go, you can take <em>her.”</em></p><p>At this, Poppy’s eyes widened and she peeped over her shoulder at him. “R-really? All day?”</p><p>Tora smirked. “’Course. S’been awhile since ya drove her.”</p><p>It had. She really didn’t have much cause to leave the house recently. She worked from home, which eliminated any sort of commute and if they went anywhere, it was usually together and Tora drove while she played the part of DJ from the passenger seat. </p><p>“But what will you do?” she asked. </p><p>“I’ll hang out here with the boy and I’ll take the beater or grab a cab when I run errands. Don’t worry about me; ya been doin’ enough of that lately. Just <em>go</em> and enjoy yerself.”</p><p>---</p><p>An hour later, Poppy was giggling and zooming down the highway in Tora’s red Subaru WRX.</p><p>Never mind the seat was pushed forward as far as it would go and completely ignore the fact that it was lifted all the way up and she <em>still</em> needed a cushion to sit on in order to see over the steering wheel. </p><p>This was the freest she’d felt in weeks, booster seat be darned.</p><p>Poppy cranked the volume of the pop song that was currently playing on the radio and merged into the exit lane for the small, historic city of Adare. Once she entered the city limits, she cruised down the main strip and into the downtown area until she was met with the metropolitan’s cobblestone square. </p><p>It was the hub and heart of Adare and her favorite place to visit when she ventured into the city; it hosted a fall festival and Christmas market every year and was home to several small shops and cafes. </p><p>Her favorite café, one that she and Tora frequented was Java Nobody’s, a cozy little building nestled in the east corner of the square. It had a large brick fireplace, old, overstuffed armchairs and several shelves stacked full of board games. </p><p>The coffee shop was well-known for its handcrafted recipe of blueberry coffee, which was one of Poppy’s favorite drinks on their menu. Maybe she would treat herself to one today.</p><p>Poppy parked the Subaru in front of what would be her first stop of the day: Komorebi Salon. She’d made sure to call ahead and booked an appointment for that morning, so when she walked in through the pink painted doors, they were already expecting her. </p><p>A young woman named Hina was her nail technician and Poppy liked her right away; she was outgoing, fun and had a pixie blue haircut and nose ring. She reminded her of Erdene and Poppy was immediately comforted by this; she missed her friend. </p><p>As soon as Poppy placed her hands in Hina’s to be filed and shaped, Hina shrieked as she zeroed in on Poppy’s engagement ring. </p><p>They chattered about the engagement excitedly, which led to Poppy pulling out her phone and showing Hina the picture of her and Tora that they’d taken at their last trip to Kintsugi Beach. </p><p>Poppy blushed when Hina squealed and goofily fanned herself at the sight of her six foot three fiancé. “Oh my god, Poppy, he’s no snack, he’s the whole <em>meal!</em> Woo, you go, girl! So when’s the wedding?”</p><p>They chatted easily as Hina painted Poppy’s nails; she opted for a terra cotta color for the fall and then asked Hina if she could add black tiger stripes across her ring fingers. She knew Tora would get a kick out of that. </p><p>When her manicure was finished, Poppy paid, left a tip for Hina and took one of her business cards. Before Poppy walked out the door, Hina wrapped her in an enthusiastic hug. “Congratulations, girl! Call me if you want a manicure for the big day and I’ll give you a friend discount. I have <em>tons</em> of ideas for cute, bridal designs.”</p><p>“I will!” Poppy beamed at her. “Thank you!”</p><p>Her next stop was a paper goods store, where she picked up cherry blossom notebooks, packs of pink sticky pads, sparkly gel pens and took her time perusing through their wedding stationary. </p><p>While she enjoyed her conversations with Quincey about the wedding, it was nice to seek out some inspiration and ideas of her own. She snapped a few pictures of her favorite designs, jotted down prices and then paid for her goodies before heading to the bookstore, the art supply shop, a vintage clothing store and then her last stop before going home, Java Nobody’s. </p><p>She ordered a blueberry coffee for herself and a plain chai tea for Tora. The tea might be lukewarm by the time she got it home to him, but he could always heat it up. He would appreciate it regardless; it was just the way he was. </p><p>Poppy placed both beverages in the sports car’s cupholders and buckled herself in before pulling away from the curb. She cruised down the street to the first four-way intersection after exiting the square and stopped at the sign. </p><p>She then accelerated forward and made it halfway across when a white Volkswagen Jetta ran the stop sign on her left and smashed into the bumper and taillight of Tora’s Subaru.</p><p>---</p><p>Poppy jolted to the side in the driver’s seat, her heartbeat thundering in her ears. She crumpled against the steering wheel as she slowly took stock of what just happened. </p><p>She’d never been in an accident before, but she had a pretty good idea of what to do. </p><p>Okay, she wasn’t injured; at the most, she might have minor whiplash later on. She could probably still drive the car home, as the damage was contained to the rear corner. Next thing was to let Tora know. With shaking hands, she pulled her cell phone from her purse and quickly typed a message to him. </p><p>
  <em>Got into a fender bender, but don’t worry, I’m okay. Going to call police to make a report.</em>
</p><p>He responded almost immediately.</p><p>
  <em>where are you</em>
</p><p>She glanced up and squinted at the road signs. </p><p>
  <em>At the intersection of Jefferson and Pyne, right outside of Adare City Square.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>on my way</em>
</p><p>At this, she smiled slightly. Of <em>course</em> he was; anything to make sure she was safe. </p><p>Okay, so she wasn’t hurt, the Subaru could be repaired. Tora knew and was on his way. Now it was time to get out of the car, check on the other person, call the police and exchange insurance information.</p><p>Poppy flipped on the caution lights as she slid out of the driver’s side of the car and then heard the door of the Volkswagen slam shut as the other person did the same. Phone in hand, she approached them carefully and then her head snapped up as her ears were assaulted by the one voice she hoped she’d never hear again. </p><p>“Pops?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I am shamelessly blaming BegoniaRex for the idea to split this into two chapters (I mean, she told me I could, so I'm gonna!)</p><p>I want absolutely ZERO credit for that cliffhanger LOL</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Collide - Part Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy is experiencing stress and finds relief in a way she doesn't expect.</p><p>Told from Poppy's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well, lucky for you guys that 1) I managed to finish the second part of this today and 2) I have no self control, so here you go, two updates in one day! </p><p>I wanted to give credit to a few people for this installment:</p><p>RaquelSousa, JFlorez0426, GeekGoddess and Foxesinboxes for their suggestions/comments regarding this particular scenario,<br/>BegoniaRex, my best friend Gaby and my husband Travis for beta-reading and offering their insight.</p><p>Also a big shoutout to Gaby for the song choice; she is a lyrical wizard!</p><p>**Fun fact: this two-shot is officially the longest standalone piece of MPL fanfic I've ever written, clocking in at over 7,700 words!**</p><p>As always, thank you all for reading and being here; enjoy!</p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“The ocean takes me in to watch you shake it<br/>
Watch you wave your powers<br/>
Tempt with hours of pleasure<br/>
Take me one more time<br/>
Take me one more wave<br/>
Take me for one last ride<br/>
I'm out of my head</p><p>Tonight, tonight<br/>
Tonight, tonight<br/>
The sound of the waves collide<br/>
The sound of the waves collide<br/>
The sound of the waves collide<br/>
Tonight we ride”<br/>
-Deftones, “Sextape”</p><p>---</p><p>Poppy’s stomach turned over and her heart clenched painfully in her chest. Of all people in this world to literally run into her, why did it have to be <em>him?</em></p><p>Julri advanced on her with one hand held high, like he was greeting her at the airport instead of approaching her after the accident he caused. </p><p>Un-fudging-believable.</p><p>Poppy noted that he still looked very much the same, except he didn’t have a red-lipped girl wrapped around him this time. Julri’s dark hair was still cropped short and he was wearing a dark pink graphic shirt that advertised the name of some fake beach, a pair of distressed jeans and beige Sperry boat shoes. </p><p>No high-top Converse or fancy, name-brand kicks here. </p><p>“How’ve you been?” he asked as they met in the middle of the intersection. </p><p>Seriously? He wanted to make small talk <em>now?</em> It was the last thing on her mind; all she wanted to do was get this taken care of and go home to Tora and Callum. </p><p>“Um, pretty great,” she finally said. “Until this happened.” She gestured at her fiance’s damaged car. </p><p>Julri chuckled a little louder than Poppy thought necessary. “Ha, yeah. I was actually just on my way to Levi’s place; he lives here now. You remember Levi?”</p><p>Poppy shook her head. She didn’t remember and it must have slipped his own memory that he was too <em>embarrassed</em> to introduce her to most of his friends. Now, she could care less. </p><p>“Oh come on, I know you’ve met Levi. Sandy blonde hair, always swooped to the side? Glasses? He was dating Clarice? Anyway, they’re engaged now and his bachelor party is tonight. It’s been a long time since I’ve been up this way… I’m not too familiar with the streets here and-“</p><p>“But you’re familiar with stop signs, right?” she cut him off, a little surprised at her own daring. Tora’s honesty must have rubbed off on her at some point. </p><p>Julri scoffed at her, but she didn’t care. She’d had enough of this; they needed to call the police and get this over with so they’d stop blocking traffic and she could go home. </p><p>Poppy brought her phone up and began to search online for the local police department’s number.</p><p>“That the phone you don’t have my number saved in?” Julri asked, his voice low. </p><p>Oh, cheese and rice, <em>really?</em></p><p>“Yeah, yeah it is,” she said without looking up at him. “And I’m going to use it to call the police now. We’ll need to exchange insurance information too, so you might want to get that out.”</p><p>“Oh, come on, Pops, do we really need to involve the cops?” he asked, his tone lighter now. “I don’t want to get a ticket or have my rates go up on top of everything else. Why don’t you get an estimate on the damage and let me know what it costs? I can Venmo you the money.”</p><p>So they could stay in <em>further</em> contact with each other? Or so he could weasel his way out of paying? He wasn’t walking all over her <em>this</em> time.</p><p>“Yeah, I’d rather call the police,” she murmured as she located the station’s main line on their website.</p><p>“Don’t you trust me, Pops?”</p><p>At this question, her head shot up and she glared at him. “After what you did to me?” she hissed. “Hell <em>no</em> I don’t trust you, Julri. Who would?”</p><p>“Is this about Mimi? Because if it is, I’m not seeing her anymore. She didn’t mean that much to me and-“</p><p>“Oh, it’s about so much more than her,” Poppy shot back. “I don’t even know where to begin, so I won’t. I’m going to make this call now and…”</p><p>Julri continued to try to convince Poppy not to dial the cops and the longer he prodded, the angrier she became. Several minutes passed as they stood arguing in the street until finally, an orange taxi cab pulled up on the curb behind Julri and Tora stepped out of it. </p><p>---</p><p>Tora said nothing to the smaller man as he walked past him and made a beeline for Poppy. He came to stand in front of her and his large body blocked her view of Julri behind him.</p><p>He cupped her face in his warm, calloused hands as he softly asked, “Ya okay, Bobby?”</p><p>She smiled up at him. “Yeah, yeah, I’m okay. But um, your car’s not.”</p><p>“Don’t give a shit about that,” Tora told her as he looked down into her eyes. “Cars can be fixed. Just as long as yer sa-“</p><p>“Um, hey, buddy?” Julri’s voice spoke out. “If you don’t mind, we’re kind of in the middle of something. It’s really none of your business, so…”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes as he turned around to face Poppy’s ex-boyfriend, who was now standing directly behind them. Before Tora could say a word, Poppy planted herself beside him and said, “Actually, Julri, Tora’s my fiancé and that’s his car, which makes it his business.”</p><p><em>”Fiance?”</em> Julri shrieked at the same moment Tora said, “That’s fuckin’ Julri?”</p><p>“Uh huh,” she said, answering both men at once and then looked up at Tora. “Julri ran a stop sign and clipped the back end of the Subaru-“</p><p>“Wait, wait, wait,” Julri said, his hands gesturing wildly in front of him. “Did you say Tora? As in the thug from those mafia trials? <em>That</em> Tora? Pops, what the hell? He’s… he’s <em>killed</em> people.”</p><p>Poppy grit her teeth as she felt Tora’s body stiffen beside her. She reached out and put a hand on his arm; it was trembling. </p><p>Of <em>course</em> that’s all Julri would see when he looked at him. In the time she’d known him, he’d never done anything but take people at face value. Poppy the Gullible Little Girl. Mimi the Easy Lay. </p><p>Tora the Criminal.</p><p>
  <em>Red.</em>
</p><p>“If you’d actually been paying <em>attention</em> to those trials,” Poppy spat as she removed her hand from Tora and took a step toward Julri, “then you’d know he had no choice; it was kill or be killed. Tora has more kindness in one of his <em>fingernails</em> than you do in your whole-“</p><p>Julri wasn’t listening to her. “I can’t <em>believe</em> this,” he told her, his eyes wide. “I leave you alone for over three years and look! <em>Look</em> what happens. I should have reached out to you sooner. Pops, he’s going to get you killed. Or kill you himself. How stupid are you?”</p><p>
  <em>Red.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Red.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Red.</em>
</p><p>Tora tread behind her silently as Poppy made another advance on Julri. <em>”Excuse me?”</em> she hissed, her hands clenching at her sides.</p><p>“You heard me!” Julri cried indignantly. “I seriously can’t believe this! I can’t <em>believe</em> you dumped me and then shacked up with a <em>murderer…”</em></p><p>
  <em>RED.</em>
</p><p>All Poppy saw was red as her right hand began balling itself into a fist, her fingers curling and clenching tightly into her palm, thumb tucked over them, just like her dad taught her. Poppy’s arm cocked backward, then her fist slammed forward and landed square on Julri’s nose with a satisfying <em>crunch.</em></p><p>---</p><p>When Poppy came back to herself, her chest was heaving as she stood over Julri, who was clutching at his face and writhing in pain on the empty street. His stupid pink shirt was now decorated with drops of blood that was spilling from his nose.</p><p>“I think you broke my nose!” he cried out from behind his hands. </p><p>“You broke my fiance’s car!” she shrieked down at him as she panted for breath. </p><p>“I’m going to call the cops!” Julri yelled. “I’m gonna press charges-“</p><p>“Oh, <em>now</em> you want to call the police?!” Poppy yelled back. “You have <em>got</em> to be kidd-“</p><p>Poppy stopped midsentence as Tora’s hand gently curled around her arm. “No one’s callin’ the cops,” he said evenly as he released her and then crouched down closely beside Julri. “Ya know how I know that?”</p><p>Julri slowly shook his head, eyes wide. </p><p>“’Cuz yer right about me. I’m a murderer. And ya know if you go to the police, I’m gonna come after you, your friends, Mimi, ya whole fuckin’ <em>family.”</em></p><p>“O-okay, no police. Got it,” Julri mumbled, his eyes as big as Poppy had ever seen them. </p><p>“Smart man,” Tora said. “Now, s’there anythin’ ya want to say ta Poppy?”</p><p>“W-what?” </p><p>“C’mon, yer the reason we’re all here right now. Gotta be <em>somethin’</em> ya wanna tell her.”</p><p>“Uh, s- sorry. I’m sorry, Poppy,” Julri sputtered. </p><p>Poppy’s own eyes widened at his words and a surge of adrenaline flooded her chest. In the entire time they dated, he’d <em>never</em> told her he was sorry, or if he had, it wasn’t a true apology. The words <em>“I’m sorry”</em> were usually followed by a <em>but:</em> <em>“but I don’t see why you should be unhappy”</em> or <em>“but it makes me disappointed to know I hurt your feelings.”</em></p><p>Never mind that Tora had intimidated the words out of Julri’s mouth; he’d said them and this time, there was no spinning it back around on her. </p><p>I’m sorry, Poppy. <em>Period.</em></p><p>The punch had felt great, gratifying but this… she’d be riding <em>this</em> high for days. </p><p>Seemingly satisfied, Tora nodded and stood, grabbing Poppy’s hand as he turned and stalked back toward the Subaru. </p><p>Poppy’s eyebrows knit together as she stumbled in Tora’s fevered wake. “What about the car?” Poppy asked loudly, the adrenaline leaking into her mouth and increasing the volume of her words. “We need to get his insurance inf-“</p><p>“Don’t care,” Tora gruffed out as they approached the passenger side of the vehicle. He wrenched the door open for her wordlessly. </p><p>“Don’t care?” she asked. “But he should <em>pay</em> for what-“</p><p>“Car can be fixed. Don’t care about the money,” he rasped out. “Ya know what I <em>do</em> care about right now?”</p><p>Poppy shook her head as a wet heat began to pool between her legs. His tone, his hooded eyes. Was he…?</p><p>“Right now I wanna get ya home so I can fuck ya, <em>hard.”</em></p><p>Poppy’s eyes lowered to just south of his waist, where his erection was prominent and straining against his dark jeans. She reached out and lightly pressed a palm to the bulge in his pants.</p><p>“Poppylan,” he hissed, <em>”get in the car.”</em></p><p>---</p><p>As soon as Poppy closed the front door behind her, Tora was hoisting her up and pinning her into it. He wound her legs around his waist and shifted her body until his cock was digging into her center, each thrust sending delicious tremors rippling through her.  </p><p>“W-where’s Cal?” she asked, not wanting them to be interrupted. </p><p>“Bedroom kennel,” he replied.</p><p>Relieved, Poppy’s eyes squeezed shut and she moaned as he kissed her hard on the mouth, his teeth catching her bottom lip as he pulled away. </p><p>“Yer a lil’ fuckin’ badass, ya know that?” he rasped into her ear. </p><p>She meant to say something, anything, but he was grinding her so <em>hard</em> into the door, her entire body was buzzing so <em>intensely</em> with need that all she could do was let out a noise that sounded halfway between a giggle and a sigh. </p><p>Tora kissed her with a hungry intensity, his lips humming against hers and then he pulled away only to wrench her blouse over her head. His mouth captured hers again as he pinched at the metal hooks of her bra; then her breasts were bare and pressing freely into his shirt. </p><p>As his teeth nipped down the line of her throat, Tora’s hands scrabbled down to cup her rear and he crushed even harder into her core; she cried out once and then again, the friction driving her mindless with pleasure.</p><p><em>”Fuck,</em> Bobby,” he moaned. “You can do <em>whatever</em> ya want ta me.”</p><p>At this, Poppy’s eyes shot open. She knew what she wanted and if he was offering, she was going to take it.</p><p>“L-living room,” she said breathlessly and immediately he was pulling her from the door, carrying her through the kitchen and setting her on the carpeted floor. </p><p>“Where do ya want me?” he asked, his eyes blazing fiery gold. </p><p>“On the floor,” she pointed. “Clothes off, on your back.”</p><p>A deep, rumbly chuckle left Tora’s mouth as he tugged his shirt over his head and flung it to the side. He stripped himself of the rest of his clothes, then stretched out in front of the coffee table and gazed at her expectantly. </p><p>Arousal boiled in her belly at the sight of him naked and completely at her mercy. She quickly shrugged out of her pants and underwear and stooped to the floor, where she crawled towards him on all fours, her eyes locked on his. She moved past his legs and his waist until she was in line with his shoulders. </p><p>With a hitched breath, she threw one leg over his neck and straddled his head between her legs. </p><p>“Fuck <em>yes,</em>” Tora groaned from beneath her and without hesitation, he sealed his mouth over her sex.</p><p>Poppy cried out and arched her back as his tongue slicked against her. She rolled her pelvis relentlessly over his face and his hands grasped at her bottom to pull her closer to him. </p><p>She didn’t do it often, but absolutely <em>nothing</em> made her feel sexier than riding his face, taking pleasure from him and having complete control over the rhythm, the movement and speed. </p><p>Control. </p><p>The thing Tora always offered to her so freely, something he constantly reminded her that she deserved. The rein he had plucked from Julri’s grasp and placed into her own. The way he had let her handle her ex-boyfriend, without stepping in or trying to hold her back. </p><p>With Tora, she could express herself without consequence and she was going to take advantage of that now. </p><p>Poppy fiercely undulated her hips over his mouth, then clenched a shock of his dark hair in her hand and pushed his head forward, urging him to go deeper. He obliged eagerly on a low moan and thrust his tongue inside of her, pumping in and out the way he knew she liked. </p><p>She threw her head back in ecstasy as he continued to ravage her with his mouth, his tongue darting between her wet tunnel and her clit. Tora hooked his arms around her legs and used them to spread her thighs further apart, granting himself easier access. </p><p>Poppy grasped at his hands and used them to anchor herself to his mouth as she pressed harder against him, mewling and sobbing as he stroked her closer and closer to oblivion. She was almost there, she was so <em>close</em> and then he sucked her clit into his mouth.  </p><p>Tears streamed from her eyes and the room fell away as Poppy shattered wildly around his face. Her whole body rocked forward and her thighs shuddered against his cheeks. </p><p>When she came back to herself, she looked down at Tora peering up at her between her legs. His eyebrows quirked as their eyes met and he smirked. </p><p>“Yer fuckin’ hot,” he rasped, his lips glistening with her. </p><p>And she wasn’t done yet. </p><p>Once she’d regained control over her limbs, Poppy lifted herself from Tora just enough to ease down his shoulders, then his chest and abs. She settled herself below his waist and took his hard length into her hand.</p><p>Tora’s head snapped back and he let out a groan as she worked her fist over his cock. She watched as his hands clenched at his sides and then smiled when his hips bucked up against the rhythm she was building. </p><p>Without saying a word, she hovered over him and sunk herself down onto his length. </p><p>Tora cried out as she slid down inch by inch until she reached his hilt. His hands flew to her hips, his fingers gripping her tightly as she began to move. </p><p>Poppy splayed her palms across his chest as she sped up, panting and desperate to make him come. She pulled herself nearly completely off his length, hovering at his head, before she plunged back down around him. </p><p>He let out a deep, guttural moan, so she did it again and <em>again,</em> her own pleasure building back up as she took in the look in his eyes as he watched her move on top of him, the feeling of him filling her completely, the way his body shivered beneath her.</p><p>Knowing she had this effect on him, this large, six foot three man, was <em>intoxicating.</em></p><p>She was moving so quick and panting so hard that for a moment, she forgot how to breathe. That sparkly pressure was building quickly in her loins and she felt close to combusting. Poppy stroked herself over him a couple more times and then she exploded, bursts of black and yellow pulsing behind her eyes. </p><p>Once she’d ridden out the last of her orgasm, she felt Tora’s grip on her hips tighten. He held her in place as he chased his own climax and then she felt his cock pulse as he emptied himself inside of her. </p><p>Boneless and sated, Poppy slid off Tora and rested at his side. He wrapped his arm around her and she laid her head in the crook of his arm, noting that he was as breathless as she was. </p><p>They laid there in silence for a string of moments before he finally turned his head and looked down at her. </p><p>“That good for ya, Bobby?” he panted.</p><p>Poppy could feel his semen slowly beginning to slide out of her and she clamped her legs tightly together; she loved being on the pill but hated the cleanup. She’d do it in a minute. </p><p>Right now, she wanted to bask in this and all that Tora had just done for her, what he’d given her. </p><p>“Yeah,” she breathed and lifted herself up to press a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you. I needed that.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Yay for victory smut!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Peerless Paramour</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy drags Tora to a Renaissance Fair. </p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p><p>** Fun fact: "peerless paramour" is a term of endearment from the Middle Ages. It means "one who has my unbeatable affection" ** :) :)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi, guys! I'm so so sorry about the gap between updates. I wasn't feeling well for about a week and then had a covid scare, but all is well. My tests were negative and I'm back at 100% :) </p><p>---</p><p>So this piece is not particularly inspired by reader suggestions, but my own experience at my local Ren Fair this past October. I was chatting with BegoniaRex about my idea for a Ren Fair story and funnily enough, she was already plotting one of her own! </p><p>I wouldn't say it's a collaboration in the traditional sense, as we didn't work on ONE story together, but we were with each other every step of the way on these pieces, whether it be beta reading, sharing inspiration for costumes, etc. I chat with her every day and I'm so grateful for her friendship! This one is for BegoniaRex and I hope you all enjoy! </p><p>You can find her Ren Fair story here: https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/67194862?show_comments=true&amp;view_full_work=false#comment_361968424</p><p>---</p><p>I also want to give credit (as always) to my best friend Gaby and my husband Travis for beta reading and sharing their own insight and opinions. They're the best people :) </p><p>---</p><p>I will also say that the timeline for these one-shots is a bit all over the place LOL. So for clarity, this one takes place before the proposal and before Callum. Poppy and Tora are freshly moved into their new apartment and Tora is struggling in his therapy sessions. </p><p>Thank you all so much for reading! I'm loving expanding on the Stages universe and am thrilled that so many of you are here for it :) </p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“She's cunning as a fox<br/>
Clever as a crow<br/>
Solid as a rock<br/>
She is stubborn as a stone<br/>
She's a hardheaded woman<br/>
And the best one that I know<br/>
And I love her”<br/>
-Passenger, “And I Love Her”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <em>”No.”</em>
</p><p>“Oh, come on, <em>please,</em> Tora?” Poppy begged. “We’ll have more fun if we dress up for it!”</p><p>Tora sighed. </p><p><em>It</em> was the Renaissance Fair that was held every year at the Galad Fairgrounds, thirty minutes south of Adare City. Though Tora had heard the phrase before, he still wasn’t exactly sure what took place at the festival. All he knew was that it was in an uncontrolled open area and endless crowds of people attended, decked out in weird costumes while they clutched bottomless beer steins. </p><p>He could think of better ways to spend a Saturday off. </p><p>But then Poppy asked if they could go (he <em>knew</em> how much she loved history and mythology, after all) and he’d gotten so wrapped up in her excitement, her puffed out cheeks and her big brown eyes that he’d been powerless to say no. </p><p>But like <em>fuck</em> was he walking around and sweating all day in a goddamn suit of armor. </p><p>“No,” he said again. </p><p>Laptop balanced on her legs and a cup of hot tea in one hand, Poppy leaned into him on the sofa and clicked on an image of a man in a brightly colored outfit with puffy sleeves, a frilly collar and a hat with a giant feather poking out of it. </p><p>“You can dress as a bard,” she said, clearly intent on ignoring him. “Oh, you could bring your guitar and play for-“</p><p>“Absolutely fucking not.”</p><p>Poppy huffed at him. “I’ve never heard you play,” she pouted. </p><p>“Ya ain’t missin’ out on anything,” he told her.</p><p>Poppy heaved a defeated sigh and then clicked on a photo of a bearded man in layers of leather, metal and… was that a <em>skirt?</em></p><p>“You would look so <em>good</em> in this studded leath-“</p><p>“Pops, I don’t wanna be uncomfortable and sweatin’ my ass off all day. Did ya see the weather for next weekend? S’posed ta get up into the high 80’s on Saturday,” Tora told her. </p><p>Poppy’s face fell a bit. “Really? That’s kind of weird for October.” She looked thoughtful for a moment and then turned back to him. “Okay, I see your point. I don’t want to be uncomfortable dressed in layers either. And since it’s outdoors, I don’t know what their… <em>bathroom</em> situation will be like.”</p><p>Tora’s eyebrows quirked up hopefully. “So, that mean we’re not gonna dress up?”</p><p>Poppy smirked up at him. “You know there’s costumes that don’t involve armor? Let’s look at some of those.”</p><p>Tora groaned as she scrolled through images of men dressed in more long-sleeved frilly blouses and pants that fit them a little too snugly in certain areas. </p><p>“What about this one?” she asked. </p><p>Tora peered over to look at the photo she’d brought up on the screen. A man about his size and build was wearing a deep olive green, almost brown shirt that fell just below his waist. It had a deep v-neck with adjustable laces and it was loose-fitting, with sleeves that tapered and tied at the wrists.  A black belt was draped casually around his midsection, along with a medieval looking leather pouch. </p><p>The black pants were also loose and tapered at the ankles, not unlike the skinny jeans Tora often wore. </p><p>It wasn’t the <em>worst</em> costume he’d seen. </p><p>“Do you like it?” Poppy asked after a moment. “You could wear your black combat boots with it. They’re already pretty broken in and that way you wouldn’t get blisters from walking around in new shoes.”</p><p>He chuckled to himself. That was his Bobby, ever the practical one-</p><p>Tora’s thoughts were lost as he zeroed in on another photo on the computer screen; a shorter, bustier woman wearing a dark pink corset patterned with a yellow rose design. Black laces tied it together in the front and it was paired with a low-cut white blouse. Instantly Tora found himself imagining the outfit hugging Poppy’s curves and how damn <em>good</em> she’d be able to fill it out…</p><p>Fuck it. He’d dress up, but he was getting something out of this, too. </p><p>“Fine, go ahead and buy that outfit,” Tora told her. </p><p>Poppy grinned widely and began bouncing up and down on the cushion beside him. </p><p>“R-really?” she squealed. </p><p>Tora smiled and gently took the mug full of tea from her so she didn’t spill it all over the couch.</p><p>“Yeah, Bobby. But-“</p><p>Immediately Poppy’s movements stopped and she glared over at him. </p><p>“Ugh, I should’ve known! There’s always a <em>but</em> with you!”</p><p>“Pfft. Damn right there is.”</p><p>“Okay, what do you want, you big thug?”</p><p>Tora smirked. “I’ll dress up for ya if you wear <em>that”</em>- he tapped at the image of the woman wearing the pink corset- “for <em>me.”</em></p><p>On either side of her ponytail, Tora saw red spreading over the tips of Poppy’s ears. </p><p><em>”Seriously?”</em> she mumbled, her gaze locked on the corset and blouse. </p><p>“Yup. S’either that or I go in sweatpants, sweetheart.”</p><p>A string of silence hung heavy in the air between them. Finally, after a moment of contemplation, Poppy perked up.</p><p>“Okay. Deal,” she said as she turned the laptop away from him and pulled her credit card from her purse.</p><p>Hmmpf. That was easier than he’d thought.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Saturday</strong>
</p><p>“Hey, Tora?” Poppy called out from the bathroom. “Would you please come help me with this corset?”</p><p>Fuck <em>yes</em> he would. </p><p>Tora hightailed it up the stairs and noted with appreciation as he moved that the costume he’d picked out was lightweight and comfortable, probably even more comfortable than his own form-fitting street clothes would’ve been. At least these wouldn’t be plastered to his skin if he got too warm. </p><p>When Tora turned the corner into the bathroom, he was met with the sight of Poppy’s backside; she was wearing slim fitting black pants and a pair of little black boots she already owned. Her tiny hands were holding aside the long braid she’d tied her hair into, exposing the lacing on the back of the corset. </p><p>Tora frowned as he stepped forward and took the fabric laces into his hands. “Thought ya needed help with the front,” he grumbled as he began working. </p><p>Poppy angled herself away from the mirror. “Um, nope, I got that part taken care of already,” she said in a higher pitched voice than he was used to. What was up with her? Even the back of her neck was turning red; well, what he could <em>see</em> of the back of her neck, anyway. The collar rode up pretty high and-</p><p>Tora’s hands froze mid-tie. </p><p>She <em>didn’t.</em></p><p>“Turn around,” he told her. </p><p>“Um, what? I already took care of the front…” she trailed off quietly. </p><p>“Bobby, <em>turn around.”</em></p><p>She did, slowly, and revealed to him the dark pink corset he’d chosen… layered over a high-necked, white blouse with flowing sleeves. </p><p>That sneaky little <em>shit.</em> Where was the damn cleavage he’d been promised?</p><p>“This ain’t the outfit we agreed on,” Tora said firmly, his eyes glaring down at her. </p><p>“Huh? Yes, it is. This is the corset that you picked out,” Poppy said, shifting her brown gaze from his. </p><p>“Yeah, it’s the same corset, but I didn’t pick out this turtleneck,” he said, rubbing the lacy collar in question between two fingers. </p><p>Poppy huffed out a breath as she looked up at him. “I know, I’m sorry. It’s just… I didn’t want to be uncomfortable, either. I didn’t like the idea of… <em>hanging out</em> all day and people staring at me.”</p><p>Tora’s shoulders dropped.</p><p>Well, shit. </p><p>He didn’t even think of <em>that.</em></p><p>Tora was so excited to see her in something racy and different from her norm that he didn’t even give any mind to the other sets of eyes that would be on her. Of course, people were going to look at her regardless; she was gorgeous and he often caught them throwing Poppy sideways glances when they went out.</p><p>It was practically a guarantee that she’d be checked out at the fair, but at least this way she’d be covered up to her comfort level. </p><p>Besides, he understood all too well not wanting to be stared at. </p><p>Tora sighed and gestured for her to turn back around. “Sorry, Bobby,” he said as he continued lacing her up. “Wasn’t thinkin’. I was just excited ta see ya in somethin’ like that.”</p><p>Poppy giggled. “Well, I mean, I’m keeping it, Tora,” she said and peeped at him over her shoulder. “I’ll wear it for you like <em>that</em> later, if you want.”</p><p>At this, heat rose to the top of Tora’s cheeks. He liked the idea of being the only one she wore it for in <em>that</em> way. </p><p>He cleared his throat as he wound the last of the laces into a small bow. “You better,” he smirked and winked at her in the mirror. Poppy blushed scarlet and dropped the braid down her back. </p><p>Tora admired her for another moment: the way the black pants gripped her curvy hips, the emphasis the corset put on her plump breasts. Even without cleavage showing, she still looked sexy as hell. </p><p>He was going to have a hard time keeping his hands off her today. </p><p>Tora gave her ass an appreciative squeeze, which earned him a playful swat on the arm. “C’mon, sweetheart. If we don’t get goin’ to the fair now, I might not let ya leave.”</p><p>---</p><p>If Tora had known that the fairgrounds were out in the middle of fucking nowhere, and the only parking available was in a large, overgrown, dusty, <em>hilly</em> field, he would’ve driven the fucking beater. </p><p>“Better be able to get outta this fuckin’ pit,” he grumbled to himself as he and Poppy exited his low-riding Subaru. </p><p>Poppy rounded the car and took his hand as she chattered excitedly about the brochure of events she’d pulled up online. They walked for what felt like two miles, down a winding dirt path dotted with trees, then a gravel walkway that led into a wooded area. </p><p>Finally, they reached the entrance: a large, brightly colored banner was tied between two trees with the words <em>“Welcome to Adare Renaissance Festival”</em> scrawled across it in medieval font. Poppy was practically bouncing in her boots as she approached one of three women who were accepting admission tickets. </p><p>The woman was short and stout, draped in a multilayered dress and an eyepatch strapped across one eye. “’Ello there, lil’ love!” she chirped in an obnoxiously false Cockney accent. “’Ow many of ya are there?”</p><p>Jesus Christ, this was his worst fucking nightmare. </p><p>Poppy, meanwhile, gaped at the woman with wide eyes, a bright smile plastered across her glowing face. “Just two of us!” she squealed and handed the woman their tickets. She scanned them quickly, handed Poppy a map of the grounds and then beckoned the two of them inside. </p><p>“Fank you! Enjoy the festivul!” the woman called after them and Poppy waved before taking Tora’s hand once again. </p><p>His little nerd held out the map in her other hand and studied it intently. While she did that, Tora took a moment to absorb his surroundings. </p><p>They were in the woods, definitely in the woods. Dozens of colored flag banners were strung between every pair of trees and there were dirt paths covered in dried leaves that led to several booths: a palm reader, a pair of women who were selling flower crowns and several vendors serving an assortment of food, including turkey drumsticks, mozzarella sticks, toasted ravioli and corn dogs. </p><p>Pfft. Since when were ravioli and corn dogs considered a feast of the Middle Ages?</p><p>Throngs of people passed by on either side of he and Poppy and his eyebrows rose as he looked at them: knights decked out in full plated armor, ladies in shimmering floor length gowns and a colorful group of superheroes Tora immediately recognized as the Avengers. </p><p>The hell?</p><p>Tora looked to his right, where a tall post had several hand-painted wood signs nailed to it, advertising the different directions to a petting zoo, a mermaid cove and Magic the Live Unicorn. </p><p>For fuck’s sake. </p><p>“Where we headin’ first?” he asked, silently begging her not to say anything about the unicorn.</p><p>“Hmmm,” she hummed and tapped her finger thoughtfully against her mouth. “Oh, can we go to the petting zoo first? It’s right over there” -she pointed to their left- “and it’s put on by a local animal sanctuary. It says here that you can…” Poppy trailed off, her eyes growing wide. </p><p>“Ya can what?”</p><p>“You. Can. Hold. An. Owl. For. Ten. Dollars,” she breathed. “Holy fudge! Do you mind if we do that first?” she asked, bouncing her weight from one foot to the other. “I’ve always wanted to hold an owl and it’s only ten dollars. The money is donated directly to the sanctuary and…”</p><p>Tora chuckled as he gazed down at the little brown eyed ball of excitement next to him. He knew how much she liked owls; she painted them often enough and had recently bought an owl wall hanging from a local thrift store. It was currently displayed in their dining room, prominently and proudly. </p><p>They would absolutely do that first and he’d take as many pictures of her holding the damn bird as she wanted. </p><p>“’Course we can,” he told her. “But we better get in line now, it looks pretty crowded.”</p><p>Poppy peered over at the rapidly growing line of people and her shoulders slumped a bit. “Yeah, that’s a long line. And it doesn’t look like it’s moving very fast. Um, I don’t want you to get bored, so maybe we can just come back later, after it’s calmed down?”</p><p>“Ain’t gonna get bored, sweetheart,” he said as he eyed a group of people passing by them; they were dressed as pirates, but also… cats? Each man and woman had a large pair of fuzzy ears secured to their three-pointed hats and long, fluffy tails swinging from their rears. Tora squinted in confusion at them as they traipsed by. </p><p>Christ, there was clearly a <em>lot</em> to see and they’d only just gotten here.</p><p>“But if ya wanna come back later, we can,” he told her. </p><p>“Yeah, let’s just do that,” she said defeatedly. “We can go check out that booth of leather goods?”</p><p>“Lead the way.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Holy shit,” Tora said as the craftsman unsheathed a sword from a leather holster and handed it to Tora. </p><p>It was considered a long sword, the man told him, and he had carved the ornate handle from exotic bloodwood. The length of the blade was half the size of his tiny girlfriend, who stood beside him watching with rounded eyes. </p><p>“Whatcha think, Bobby?” he asked her as he gently handled the blade. “Should I get it?”</p><p>Poppy’s face scrunched up. “Tora, what are you going to do with a sword?”</p><p>“Scare the shit outta anyone who breaks into our house.” </p><p>“Um, no.”</p><p>“Think about it, sweetheart. Everyone’s expectin’ ya to have a gun,” he told her. “The last thing they’ll ‘spect is ta be confronted by a dude in his boxers chargin’ at ‘em with a sword.”</p><p>The craftsman barked out a laugh as Poppy vehemently shook her head no. </p><p>“He’s got a point, little lady,” he said.</p><p>Poppy rolled her eyes and stepped away from them, pretending to be fascinated by a rack of men’s leather belts. </p><p>Tora chuckled as he handed the sword back to its seller and thanked him for bringing it out to show him. He stepped across the booth to the small table Poppy was now hovering over, which displayed leather bound journals and satchels. As he came to stand beside her, something swinging from a hanging rack above them caught his eye and his mouth turned up at the corners.  </p><p>“Hey Bobby, think these would look nice on ya,” he said as he plucked one of the items from its hanger. </p><p>“Hmmm?” she asked as she gazed up at him. Her eyes fell on the pair of leather, fur-lined handcuffs dangling from his hand and she blushed bright red.</p><p>“Oh my god, Tora!” she yelped as she quickly glanced around the booth at the other patrons. “Put them back!”</p><p>Tora pouted playfully as he slid them back on the hanging rack. “Am I not allowed ta have <em>any</em> fun today?” he asked. </p><p>“Y-yes, yes you are, just stop doing it at my expense!” she shrieked. </p><p>Pfft, yeah. As if <em>that</em> was ever going to happen. </p><p>---</p><p>After they left the leather goods booth, Tora and Poppy meandered through the mermaid cove, where he snapped photos of Poppy talking elatedly with Melody the Mermaid, who stayed in character the entire time. </p><p>When they left the cove, a dirt path curving to the left led them to a booth for axe-throwing, which Tora was instantly intrigued by. </p><p>“Fuckin’ badass,” he said. “Wanna try that out, Bobby?”</p><p>“Um, no thanks.”</p><p>“Aw, c’mon, why not?”</p><p>“You know how clumsy I am,” she blushed. “And besides, I have the upper body strength of a toddler. I wouldn’t be able to make it stick. But I’ll wait for you if you want to give it a try?”</p><p>“Ya don’t gotta be the Hulk to make it stick,” Tora told her. “Look, there’s a little kid doin’ it.”</p><p>Poppy sighed as she brought her wallet out of her pocket. “Okay, I’ll do it. How much is it?”</p><p>The wait was short and when they stepped up to the table, Poppy paid ten dollars for them each to throw an axe five times. Tora selected one of the heavier, more ornate axes while Poppy chose a smaller hatchet. </p><p>They each took turns hurling their weaponry at the large, splintered wood boards at the back of the booth. Tora’s stuck every time, getting closer and closer to the bullseye, while Poppy’s continued to bounce off and land on the ground. </p><p>“See? I told you I couldn’t do it,” she grumbled as she retrieved her axe for the final throw. </p><p>“Well, Pops, yer throwin’ it one-handed,” Tora told her. “Now, c’mere, stand in front of me. Why don’tcha try it with two hands? It might be easier for ya.”</p><p>Tora coached her gently, righting her stance and loosening her grip on the axe. He put her directly in line with the bullseye and told her to throw it whenever she was ready.</p><p>Poppy heaved the axe over her head and they both watched as it sunk into the very bottom righthand corner of the board. </p><p>Tora bit back a laugh as his tiny girlfriend jumped up and down with glee. “Did you see that? I did it!”</p><p>He held his fist out and she bumped it with her own. </p><p>“Good job, shorty.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Oh my gosh, Tora, look at all the fudge!” Poppy squealed as she bounded up to a booth titled “Whiskey Chocolate Co.”</p><p>“Pops, it’s 10:30 in the mornin’,” Tora called after her. He wasn’t sure why he said it; it’s not like her sweet tooth operated on a schedule. </p><p>As he walked up behind her, he overheard her asking for a sample of orange vanilla fudge infused with bourbon. The server nocked off a small piece of the orange chocolate and handed it over to Poppy, who took a bite and sighed deeply. </p><p>“Mmm. You have to try this,” she said and held it up to his mouth. </p><p>Tora crossed his arms over his chest. “Don’t drink.”</p><p>Poppy giggled. “Tora-“</p><p>“Sir,” the server said, “we have other fudge that isn’t infused with alcohol. Peanut butter, caramel, hazelnut…”</p><p>“Don’t do anythin’ sweet,” he told the red-haired woman and gazed down at Poppy, who was happily chewing on the rest of her sample. “But she can get whatever she wants.”</p><p>Poppy sampled a couple more pieces and decided to build her own truffle box. “I get to pick any ten,” she told Tora. “We can split it! What flavors do you want?”</p><p>“Don’t want any, Bobby. Get whatever ya like.”</p><p>Poppy eyed him carefully before turning to the woman behind the counter. “I’ll take two of the orange vanilla bourbon, two of the birthday cake, one tiramisu and five of the strawberry, please,” she said with a wink up at Tora.</p><p>He smiled down at her. “Thanks, kid.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Aren’t you going to eat your fudge?” Poppy asked as she polished off her second birthday cake truffle.</p><p>“Uh, maybe after lunch,” he told her as he glanced over at a group of people sauntering toward them on the dirt roadway. Darth Vader, followed by a posse of Stormtroopers. </p><p>The fuck?</p><p>“What’s the goddamn theme?” Tora asked after they passed. </p><p>Poppy giggled and shrugged. “I don’t know, fun? I saw Neo from The Matrix earlier. Oh! And when you went to the bathroom, I saw King Arthur and his knights from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. One guy had a bloody stuffed rabbit attached to his neck.”</p><p>Tora grinned as he led Poppy to the booth where they were serving giant turkey drumsticks. “Okay, <em>that’s</em> pretty fuckin’ funny. Ya want one of these, Pops?” he asked as they joined the line. </p><p>Poppy nodded. “Yes, please. I don’t think you can truly say you’ve been to the Renaissance Fair if you don’t eat a drumstick.”</p><p>“That’s my girl.”</p><p>Tora ordered two bottles of water and two turkey drumsticks, one plain for him and one smothered in sweet barbeque sauce for Poppy. They found a small tree a few feet from the crowds of people and plopped themselves down in the shade to eat their lunch. He handed Poppy her drumstick and watched as she used both of her tiny hands to hold it while she took a giant bite. </p><p>“Whatcha think?” he laughed as she pulled the leg of meat away from her mouth. The tip of her nose and her lips were covered in sauce. </p><p>“I think I’m making a mess,” Poppy giggled and wiped at her face with a napkin. As she scrubbed, Tora took a moment to check her out, her curvy hips and her large bust that was accentuated by that sexy, flowered corset. The… giant glob of barbeque sauce on her white blouse, dribbled over the swell of her breast. </p><p>“Uh, Bobby, ya got a lil’ somethin’ on your shirt,” he said. Before she could glance down, he had taken one of his own napkins and began to wipe it away. </p><p>“Oh, thank you,” she said. Tora swabbed at the spot vigorously; he’d succeeded in rubbing the sauce into the white fabric and making it less noticeable but he was enjoying himself, damnit.  </p><p>Tora continued to rub the napkin across her shirt and then dipped his hand a little lower, beneath the fabric of the corset. When she didn’t react, he did it again, slipping his fingers down further until they brushed across her nipple. </p><p>“Oh my god, Tora!” Poppy squealed and swatted at his arm. When he glanced up at her face, it was pinched tightly and blushing bright red. </p><p>Tora laughed as he removed his hand from her. “Think I got it.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Okay, we still have an hour until the jousting tournament,” Poppy said as she skimmed the brochure. “What do you want to do while we wait?”</p><p>Tora glanced around at the surrounding booths: a costume vendor, a woodworking stall, a glass blowing demonstration and nestled beside a metal jeweler’s table was a jester presiding over a standing pull up bar. </p><p>Beside the bar was a sign advertising that the first five people of the day to hold themselves up on the bar for two minutes straight would win $100. </p><p>Pfft. He could do that easy. </p><p>“Gonna hit the gym, Bobby,” he said to her over his shoulder. “C’mon.”</p><p>As Tora approached, the jester cackled wildly at him. “Oooh, think you have what it takes, sire? Not one peasant has claimed victory in this today. You know what they say: the bigger the man, the harder he falls.”</p><p>Tora smirked and shifted his eyes to Poppy, who was giggling and bowing at a large dog whose owners had dressed it up as a king.  </p><p>Well, the jester wasn’t wrong in that. </p><p>---</p><p>“Here, take it,” Tora told Poppy as he tried to hand her the crisp $100 bill. </p><p>“Tora, you won it,” she said and shoved it back at him. “Maybe you can spend it at that leather booth you liked?”</p><p>“Hmm, true,” he said and tucked the bill into his wallet. “Think those handcuffs were only $85.”</p><p>Predictably, Poppy’s head snapped up at him, a blush blazing over her cheeks. “Oh my god, would you cut it out, you big bully?” she grumbled but he could see a smile widening across her face. </p><p>Tora laughed. “How much time ‘til that tournament?”</p><p>“We still have about forty-five minutes,” she said with a quick glance at her phone. “We can head over that way so we can get good seats? I heard it gets pretty crowded.”</p><p>Tora polished off his strawberry truffles as he followed Poppy to the outdoor jousting arena. It was pretty big, maybe 200 feet and the arena floor was covered in cratered sand. A long wooden beam was propped up longways in the middle of the stadium, which was surrounded by metal bleachers and chairs. </p><p>Two large stages sat parallel on either side of the arena; each had a set of three gold gilded thrones perched on them and they were occupied by kings and their queens. Red and black flags waved in the wind on one side, while banners of blue and yellow bordered the opposite. </p><p>A middle-aged man in full plated black armor walked up and down the sand-covered ground, chatting with guests leisurely. A young brunette woman with glasses, dressed in red squire robes, was dragging a long, heavy rope onto one side of the arena. </p><p>“Where ya wanna sit?” Tora asked as they approached the edge of the stadium. </p><p>Before Poppy could answer him, a raspy, British voice came booming out of the speakers that dotted the border of the arena. “Welcome, my lords and ladies! While we wait for our champions to prepare for this afternoon’s joust, we will be holding a tug of war competition on the right end of the field. Squire, wave your hands so that they might see you.”</p><p>The little woman dressed in red waved both hands in the air eagerly. </p><p>“Should you wish to join, simply walk onto the arena and take hold of the rope. The squire will call the competition as she sees fit.”</p><p>Poppy turned to Tora with round eyes. “Wanna go play tug of war?”</p><p>Tora snorted. “What, me on one side and everyone else on the other?”</p><p>She giggled. “No. If we’re going to do this, I want you on <em>my</em> team.”</p><p>“Sure, kid. After you.”</p><p>As Tora and Poppy approached the field, a man with cropped hair, a beard and a blue button-down shirt was swaggering back and forth past the squire. </p><p>“Come on, sweetheart, me and my five friends versus everyone else.” He gestured to the muscular men standing behind him. "We can take ‘em,” he said, staring pointedly at the five or six kids and teenagers clutching the opposite end of the rope. </p><p>“Well, sir, the teams should be divided evenly…”</p><p>“What, you don’t think we can do it? We’re man enough. Unless ya need us to prove it to you,” he said, stumbling closer to the squire. </p><p>Tora told Poppy to stand at the other end of the rope and then moved between the asshole and the young woman. </p><p>“Everythin’ okay?” Tora asked her over his shoulder. </p><p>Asshole stared at him in confusion; his eyes were bright red and he could barely stand on both of his feet. It smelled like the fuckhead had just been showering in alcohol. </p><p>“Um, well,” the squire began, “I was just explaining that the teams should be divided evenly. There are kids on one side and…”</p><p>“Me ‘n my girlfriend’ll be on the kids’ team,” Tora told her as he glared down at Asshole. </p><p>“Yeah, so will we,” another young couple said as they walked up behind the squire. Collectively four or five other people fell into line on the kids’ side. </p><p>Asshole stared past Tora at the growing team. “Now, hold on. That’s not even-“</p><p>“S’matter?” Tora murmured in a low, even tone. “Ain’t ya man enough?”</p><p>Asshole’s eyes tried to focus on Tora as he squinted at him and smirked. “Nah, we can handle it. We’ll call this one the Beards versus the Blouses,” he said and backed away to join his friends at their end of the rope. </p><p>Tora turned and strode to the middle of the rope, where Poppy and the other adults were scattered between the kids. “I’m gonna count ta three and when I do, let go of the rope,” he said and squeezed Poppy’s outstretched hand as he moved past her. “Spread it around.”</p><p>The adults and older kids laughed and nodded at him in agreement. </p><p>Tora stalked to the end of the rope, gripped it tightly between both hands and planted his feet as deeply into the sand as he could. </p><p>The squire counted down the game and the two teams began tugging. The six men were just as strong as they looked and when Tora felt the slightest hint of himself being pulled forward, he began to count. </p><p>“One!”</p><p>Poppy, the other adults and kids joined him on two. </p><p>“Three!” they cried and every one of them let the rope fall away from their hands. Tora smirked as the six men on the other side all flung backwards and landed on their backs like turtles in the sand. Tora’s team and the crowd burst into laughter; even the squire had to stop herself giggling long enough to declare them the victors. </p><p>Once the six drunk men pushed themselves off the ground and stumbled out of the arena, yelling and cursing about cheaters as they went, Tora walked up to Poppy. </p><p>“Wanna play again?” he asked. </p><p>“Yeah, that was fun!” she smiled and then glanced behind her; the adults from their side were exiting the field, leaving only a handful of children grasping the rope. “Um, but I think we lost most of our team.”</p><p>Tora shook his head. “Looks like ya got plenty of people ta me,” he grinned at her. </p><p>Poppy’s mouth stretched into a smile. “So me and the kids versus Mr. Six Foot Three?”</p><p>“S’long as the squire’s okay with it,” he said, gazing at the young woman expectantly. </p><p>“Sure thing,” the squire said. “Places, everyone!”</p><p>Off and on for the next fifteen minutes, Poppy and a group of small children tugged at the rope and cheered as Tora allowed himself to be pulled across the line in the sand. </p><p>---</p><p>“My lords and ladies, thank you for joining us on this festive day!” the voice of the black armored knight bellowed over the speakers. </p><p>He continued to explain the rules of the tournament: the first rider to dismount the other with their lance was the winner, plain and simple. </p><p>The knight then introduced the two competitors: Sir Roderick, a merciless knight who had sailed all the way from Spain to joust in this tournament. His horse wore a flashy red and black caparison that flowed in the wind as Roderick galloped proudly past his onlookers across the stadium from Tora and Poppy. </p><p>The other rider was Lady Reika, a noblewoman from France who had a heart of gold and a fist of iron. Her horse wore shades of blue and yellow, the same as the flags that decorated the bleachers where Poppy and Tora were seated. </p><p>The black armored knight allowed each rider to give a speech and while Reika spoke of her homeland, of justice and fighting to make her father proud, Roderick screamed that he and his people had traveled to this land for “murder” and “bloodshed.” </p><p>At this, Tora’s jaw clenched. Staged jousting tournament or not, he hated the words. </p><p>“So that fuck’s the bad guy,” he murmured to Poppy.</p><p>Poppy nodded. “Mmmhmm, looks like it.”</p><p>“Hope she knocks his ass in the dirt,” Tora said. </p><p>The riders were called to practice in the middle of the field and took turns trying to spear large metal rings that the squires tossed into the air. Finally, the knight announced the first run. </p><p>Reika and Roderick’s horses galloped head on toward each other and there was a loud, metallic <em>clang</em> as the rider’s lances connected with the other’s shields. Reika’s lance splintered into two pieces and Roderick roughly jostled around in his saddle as he flung his shield to the ground. </p><p>Tora’s eyebrows quirked up as their side of the arena cheered loudly for Reika. </p><p>Okay. This was pretty cool. </p><p>Tora and Poppy watched as they jousted for ten more minutes, each rider jabbing at the other with their long staffs and jerking around in their saddles. </p><p>“This is child’s play!” Roderick cried from the back of his horse. “I demand…”</p><p>“’Bloodshed’? Ya think he’s gonna say ‘bloodshed’?” Tora asked Poppy, who snickered quietly. </p><p>“Oh, absolutely.”</p><p>
  <em>”BLOODSHED!”</em>
</p><p>Tora and Poppy howled with laughter as Roderick continued his boisterous speech.</p><p>“I will fight in the name of my people!” Reika cried back from the other side of the arena. </p><p>The black armored knight attempted to talk Roderick down, stating that there was no need for death on a day of festivity. Roderick responded by charging the knight on horseback and slicing at the older man’s arm with his sword. </p><p>Against the sunlight, a thin line of blood spurted from the open “wound.”</p><p>Holy shit. </p><p>“All right, good people! Roderick cannot be pacified by a mere joust,” the knight announced, clutching dramatically at his arm. “If he wants bloodshed, then he shall have it. If you are not abhorred by violence or squeamish at the sight of blood, return at 4:00 for a fight… to the <em>death!”</em></p><p>The crowd cheered wildly and began to disperse as Tora looked down at his girlfriend. </p><p>“Pops, we <em>gotta</em> come back for that.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Looks like we got an hour ta kill,” Tora said as they headed back to the main dirt road. “Whatcha wanna do?”</p><p>“Um, maybe we can just walk around for awhile, check out the other side of the park?” </p><p>“Sure, can I see the map?” he asked. She passed it to him. </p><p>Now, where the hell was that petting zoo?</p><p>As Tora scanned the paper, he felt Poppy nudge him sharply in the side. </p><p>“Ow, what the fuck, Pops?” he groaned. </p><p>“Here comes the king!” she giggled and dipped her body forward in a bow. </p><p>Tora looked in the direction she’d been gesturing and was met with the sight of the same large dog as before, dressed as royalty, being paraded around by his owners. </p><p>“Oh, for fuck’s sake-“</p><p>“Tora, bow!” Poppy snickered. </p><p>He heaved a deep breath and leaned into a dramatic bow, chuckling as he did. He stole a quick glance over at her and Poppy’s big brown eyes shone back at him. </p><p>“Thank you,” she said. </p><p>“Nerd,” he smiled. </p><p>---</p><p>Once Tora located the petting zoo on the map, he led Poppy to its entrance. </p><p>“You still wanna hold that damn owl?” he asked her, but he didn’t need to. She was peering past the line of people to an open space in the crowd; a light-haired man dressed in rugged leather was standing in front of a hand painted mural of birds, balancing a barn owl on a thick, handling glove. </p><p>“Yeah, but look at the li-“</p><p>Tora cut her off by gripping her hand in his and pulling her forward into the roped pathway. “Line ain’t gonna die down, Pops. This is something ya wanna do and I don’t mind waitin’.” </p><p>Poppy squeezed his hand tightly. “Okay.”</p><p>The line moved forward more quickly than before and while they waited, they stooped to pat the other animals they passed in their enclosures: a donkey, a small cow and a pair of pygmy goats. </p><p>Poppy squealed as they approached a larger woman with a ring-tailed lemur curled up on her lap. </p><p>“You can pet him,” the handler told Poppy as she snapped pictures of the lazy little animal. “His name is Lamar.”</p><p>After Poppy petted Lamar the Lemur into a nap, they stepped forward beneath a canopy where a baby kangaroo was poking out of a large, soft fabric bag. Again, Poppy shrieked and the joey’s handler offered her a small handful of treats to feed him. Tora stood silently by, snapping pictures with his phone until she was done. </p><p>When they finally reached the table for payment, Poppy sanitized her hands while Tora fished the $100 bill from his wallet. </p><p>The young brunette volunteer looked up at him with round eyes. “Sir, I’m sorry,” she said, “but I don’t think we can break this…”</p><p>“Don’t want any change,” he replied and held the bill out to her. </p><p>The girl gasped. “But-“</p><p>“Goes toward the animals, don’t it?” he asked. </p><p>“Well, yes...”</p><p>“Keep it.”</p><p>The girl thanked him profusely as she tucked the bill into the cash drawer. She then turned to Poppy and instructed her to stand beside the bird handler. </p><p>The light-haired man held the glove out for Poppy and she slid her tiny hand inside, a bright smile painted across her face as she stared at the tawny-colored owl now perched on her fist. </p><p>Tora tapped his finger over the camera button on his phone in rapid succession, determined to take as many pictures as he could. Hopefully she’d find at least a couple of them frame worthy. </p><p>“Hi, sweet baby!” Poppy said softly to the bird, who cocked its head at her in return. She laughed and with tears in her eyes, she looked up and beamed at Tora, who continued to snap away. </p><p>He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen her so happy. </p><p>She stood there for a minute longer, quietly talking to the bird and giggling as it began to clean itself on her hand. When Poppy swiveled her arm to surrender the bird back to its handler, Tora called out to her. </p><p>“Just a sec,” he told her, his finger still hovering over the camera button. “Lemme get a couple more.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Welcome back, my lords and ladies!” the black armored knight boomed over the speakers of the jousting arena. “Are you prepared for a fight… to the <em>DEATH?!”</em></p><p>From their seats on Lady Reika’s side, Tora and Poppy joined the crowd in cheering wildly. </p><p>The knight once again introduced the two riders, who paraphrased their same speeches from the first showing, presumably for the people who may have missed it. </p><p>As Roderick trotted past their bleachers, Poppy cupped her little hands around her mouth. “Boooo!” she hollered and Tora barked out a laugh as the knight’s head snapped up in her direction, a small smirk tugging its way across his face. </p><p>Oh, that dude was eating this shit up. </p><p>“My people did not cross an ocean for a day of play,” Roderick called out to the throngs of people surrounding the stadium. “We are here and we demand…”</p><p>“Bloodshed?” Poppy asked as she leaned into Tora.</p><p>“Pfft. Definitely bloodshed.”</p><p><em>”BLOODSHED!”</em> Roderick boomed and Poppy giggled madly. Tora slung an arm around her and pressed a kiss to her temple. </p><p>Across the arena, Roderick’s crowd cheered loudly. </p><p>“Well, I was <em>born</em> here,” Lady Reika yelled from the other end of the sand pit. “And my people demand <em>JUSTICE!”</em></p><p>Tora and Poppy whooped as Reika thundered past them on her horse. </p><p><em>“Put him in the ground!”</em> Poppy squealed. A smattering of people around them laughed and Tora’s eyes widened in disbelief as he chuckled at the little woman tucked under his arm. </p><p>Feisty ass little hamster. </p><p>The knight went on to explain the rules: no lances and no helmets, only combat by shield and sword was allowed. The opponents would ride toward each other, swords drawn and the rider who didn’t drop dead from their horse was the winner. </p><p>Tora and Poppy watched as Roderick and Reika galloped to meet and “stab” their swords at each other over the wooden beam in the center of the arena. Their blades met with a sharp, metal <em>clank</em> and both knights remained on their saddles unscathed. </p><p>As the black armored knight began to call a second run, Roderick sprinted forward on his horse and swung at Reika with no warning. Reika leaned backwards on her horse and quickly dismounted to the ground. </p><p>“Roderick, I will not tolerate this!” the knight called out. “You will fight fairly or you will pay with your life!”</p><p><em>Fake.</em> </p><p>It was fucking fake, but Tora found himself holding his breath as Roderick rounded back and charged at the knight, who was advancing on him by foot in the sand. </p><p>The knight removed his sword from its sheath at his waist, but he was too late. With one swift swing, Roderick bore down a killing blow to the knight, who collapsed limply to the ground. </p><p>It was acting, Tora knew that, but it was unnerving to see a live person mimic the actions of a dead one so <em>well.</em></p><p>That fucking Roderick was going to get what was coming to him. </p><p>He <em>had</em> to.</p><p>The crowd screamed in a frenzy as Roderick also dismounted his horse and collected his shield from one of the squires. Fucking coward. </p><p>He advanced quickly on Reika, who blocked his first swings with well-practiced defensive maneuvers. Roderick then used his shield to shove Reika, who wasn’t expecting it and left herself wide open to a jab in her side. </p><p>Tora felt Poppy’s body tense against his own as Reika dropped to her knees, her face tilted toward the sky. He squeezed Poppy tighter against him as Roderick stepped up to Reika and flung his shield to the side, sword held high. </p><p>“May you always remember this as the day a little girl died face down while playing in the dirt!” he screamed.</p><p>Poppy gasped as the man heaved his sword down. It clanked loudly against Reika’s blade as she used one hand to hold it up and block his blow. </p><p>“Reika! Reika! Reika!” the crowd cried as the female knight stood to her feet and charged at Roderick, who was now backing away from her, no shield to hide behind. </p><p>Reika unleashed a flurry of swings with her silver sword and eventually disarmed Roderick. His blade landed on the ground at her feet. She stooped to pick it up and advanced on the other knight, demanding that he get on his knees. </p><p>He dropped to the ground, his head lowered in defeat. </p><p>“Look up at me,” Reika hissed as she approached Roderick from behind. He did and she crossed the two swords in an X across his neck. </p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched. </p><p><em>Fuck.</em> She was going to cut his throat, just like Vi-</p><p>“I’m better than you,” she spat down at the man on his knees before her, “and I want you to live with that.”</p><p>Tora released his breath as Reika dropped the blades to the ground, turned and walked away from Roderick, who was still slumped over in the dirt. </p><p>
  <em>Justice.</em>
</p><p>Justice, not violence, was the answer. </p><p>The crowd went wild.</p><p>---</p><p>“Whew, I’m pooped,” Poppy said sleepily as they lowered themselves into Tora’s Subaru. “That was a lot of walking.”</p><p>“Maybe for a shorty like you,” Tora smirked as he buckled himself in. </p><p>Poppy swatted playfully at his arm. “Can it, you big thug.” </p><p>As he pulled away from the dirt lot, Poppy reached across the console for his hand and squeezed it tight.</p><p>“Thanks for going with me today,” she said softly to him. “I know it’s not really your thing, but I had a lot of fun.”</p><p>“Pfft, don’t have ta thank me, sweetheart,” he replied. “I had fun, too. ‘Sides, I like seein’ ya happy.”</p><p>“Yeah?” she beamed at him from the passenger seat. </p><p>“Yeah,” he said. “So when’s the next one?”</p><p>“Oh, not until next fall,” she replied. “It goes on once a year, from September to October.”</p><p>“’Kay, good.” He smiled over at her. “Plenty of time to work on our costumes.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Our First Christmas - Part One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>****SPOILER ALERT: there are references to a fast pass episode in this chapter****</p><p>Poppy and Tora celebrate their first official Christmas together. </p><p>Told from Poppy and Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm baaaack! I hope you enjoy this next segment of the Stages series; once again, it ended up being super long, so I decided to expand it into a two-shot lol. I'm sure you guys won't mind :) </p><p>I wanted to give credit to a few people for this first work:</p><p>BegoniaRex, Tayleb87 and GeekGoddess for their suggestions/comments regarding this particular scenario,<br/>BegoniaRex, and my husband Travis for beta-reading and offering their insight,<br/>and my best friend Gaby for the song suggestion; she is a lyrical genius!</p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You know it ain't easy<br/>
For these thoughts here to leave me<br/>
There are no words to describe it<br/>
In French or in English<br/>
'Cause diamonds they fade<br/>
And flowers they bloom<br/>
And I'm telling you”<br/>
-Citizen Cope, “Sideways”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>December 2nd</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora</em>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Do I really hafta?” Tora groaned to the little woman seated on the floor beside him. </p><p>“Yes, Tora,” the muffled voice of Poppy said from the depths of the box she’d dragged out from their storage unit. “This is our first official Christmas together and I want you to go pick out your own decorations to put up. I already have mine.”</p><p><em>Their first Christmas.</em> </p><p>They’d been dating for three years now, but this was the first Christmas that wasn’t overshadowed by the looming circumstances of Tora’s previous life. This year, they wouldn’t be dealing with the fall out of Poppy’s abduction or the discovery of Goliath’s notebook. This year, they wouldn’t be holed up in a witness protection apartment, eating cold take out on an uncomfortable sofa. </p><p>No, this year was their first. This year, they could hang decorations, dress their Cavapoo puppy in holiday sweaters, give each other gifts wrapped in brightly colored paper. Have everyone over for a family dinner. </p><p>This was their first Christmas together. </p><p>This was Tora’s first Christmas <em>ever.</em></p><p>From what he understood, it was supposed to be a time for celebrating, relaxing and spending time with the ones they loved. This was supposed to be the easy part, but Tora had never been more fucking terrified.</p><p>“Ah- I found it!” she cried as she pulled herself out of the large carton. She triumphantly held up a ceramic angel draped in a blue dress; it was easily a foot tall with large, feathered wings that wound around its body, crossing over each other above the head in a makeshift halo. </p><p>“This is Ishrikhara,” she told Tora. “She protects the ones who have slipped beneath the cracks. It’s a really old Narin legend, have you heard of it?”</p><p>Tora shook his head. </p><p>“My dad told me about it when I was little,” she continued as she ran a finger across the angel’s dress. “We put her on top of our Christmas tree every year as a reminder that everyone had a place in our home for the holidays, no matter where they came from.”</p><p>Hmmpf. He’d never had the chance to meet Poppy’s father and he wondered what the man would have to say about his only daughter shacking up with a reformed mafia thug. </p><p>Would he still have a place in their home, their family, if he’d known?</p><p>“You might want to go shopping soon,” Poppy said as she went back to digging through the box. “This time of year is busy and the stores get picked over pretty quickly.”</p><p>Tora heaved a giant sigh. The last thing he wanted to do on a Saturday morning was shove around in a store filled with people, shopping around for Christmas decorations. Shit, he wasn’t even sure what he was going to be looking for. </p><p>But this was something that clearly meant a lot to his little girlfriend and so he would pull his weight. After the heaviness of the past couple years, there wasn’t much he wouldn’t do to make her smile. </p><p>“Fine,” Tora mumbled and pushed himself from the floor. “Be back soon.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>December 2nd</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Poppy</em>
</p><p>---</p><p>When Tora came stomping into the apartment two hours later, kicking his black boots off, his arms bogged down with plastic shopping bags, grumbling about “stupid fuckin’ people” and “stupid fuckin’ Christmas,” Poppy bit back a laugh. </p><p>Since they’d been together, Tora had become noticeably less grumpy, but he still had his moments. This moment in particular, him barging into the apartment, gruffing out “Here you go, ya lil’ shit,” as he passed her the bags of goodies, he reminded her of the anti-Santa: a crabby, dark-haired clean-shaven man who wanted nothing to do with people, cookies or Christmas. </p><p>“Come here, you old grump,” Poppy said and when he came to stand in front of her, scowling with his arms crossed over his chest, she held out a bundle of Christmas berries above her head. “We’re under the mistletoe, so now you have to give me a kiss.”</p><p>At this, Tora’s eyes softened a bit and he smirked down at her. “Yer the only one who’s under it, Bobby.”</p><p>She puffed out her cheeks at him in annoyance; even after three years together, he never passed up an opportunity to tease her about her size. </p><p>“You hold it up then, Mr. Six Foot Three,” she said sternly. </p><p>His eyes met hers for a moment and then he finally uncrossed his arms and placed one hand on his hip as he plucked the mistletoe from her with the other. He held it above his head as high as he could and smiled as he leaned down toward her. </p><p>Poppy expected a quick peck on the lips, so when Tora’s mouth firmly met hers, his tongue probing for entrance, she gasped in surprise and her eyes fluttered shut. He kissed her with an intensity that left her breathlessly moaning against his lips and when she finally pulled herself away, she was panting a little. </p><p>Tora’s eyes glinted with lust as he smiled widely at her. </p><p>Fudging jerkface <em>tease</em> of a boyfriend. </p><p>“Oh, stop flashing your… your <em>obscene</em> dimples at me,” she huffed and turned her back on him to begin digging through the bags he’d brought home. </p><p>If she was being honest, she was eager to see what Tora had picked out. Over the course of the year, he’d gradually become more comfortable with contributing to the décor of their home and his taste never ceased to surprise her. </p><p>More than once he’d come home with items from their favorite local thrift store, including a metal wall hanging that served as a samurai sword holder, a small, bronzed tortoise figurine and a guitar pick in an antique frame. </p><p>His style certainly clashed with her own, but it was never a question of <em>if</em> they would display his décor pieces, but more a question of <em>why</em> those particular pieces? What made them stand out to him? Always eager for a chance to climb around inside her boyfriend’s mind, she made sure to ask about each one he brought home.</p><p>When she’d asked about the sword mount, he’d shrugged. “It looked cool and I thought we could hang our keys from it.” It now hung beside their door and supported their keys, Callum’s leash and an old bandana that belonged to Goliath. </p><p>When it came to the tortoise, his answer changed over the course of a few days. Initially he’d plopped it on their living room end table and when she mentioned it, Tora said he’d picked it up because it was “little and cute like her.” Eventually, the tortoise migrated to their entry way table, facing the door. </p><p>His reasoning was that he’d been inspired by Poppy’s interest in mythology and old legends, so he’d done a little research about the trinket online. He’d found out it was one of several Feng Shui celestial animals and symbolized support, longevity and protection. </p><p>Poppy had smiled brightly at him when he told her this; he’d said the tortoise reminded him of her, but in her opinion, it was more a symbol of <em>him:</em> hard-shelled and protective on the outside, but beneath it all, he was fragile and such a soft, gentle soul. </p><p>The guitar pick didn’t hold any significant meaning to Tora. It didn’t belong to a particular artist or band that he liked or had even heard of. He’d said he just liked music and proceeded to hang it beside a framed picture of them on their living room wall. </p><p>“I still can’t believe I haven’t heard you play,” she’d said after he mounted it.</p><p>Tora shrugged. “Not much to hear,” he’d told her. “I ain’t that great at it.”</p><p>He’d seemed so insecure and reluctant to play for her that she’d let it go and hadn’t said a word about it since. For her, that framed guitar pick served as a sliver of hope that, while he hadn’t yet, maybe one day he would be comfortable enough to create music around her.</p><p>The first bag Poppy rifled through was filled with nothing but shiny, rainbow-colored garland. Literally piles and piles of the stuff. When she grinned up at him, his eyebrows furrowed together. </p><p>“Didn’t know what color ya’d want,” he mumbled. “That one had all of ‘em.”</p><p>“I appreciate it, Tora, but this was supposed to be about what <em>you</em> wanted,” she told him. He’d told her a couple of weeks ago that this was his first time celebrating Christmas and since then, she was determined that he be involved in every aspect of it. </p><p>“It looked… pretty to me,” he said quietly. “But I can take it back if ya don’t like it.”</p><p>“No! No, it’s perfect,” she assured him. “If you like it, then so do I.”</p><p>Poppy moved to the second bag, which was filled with boxes of rainbow-colored Christmas lights. She looked up at him and smiled again. </p><p>“Matched the garland,” he mumbled. </p><p>“I’m glad you bought these,” she told him earnestly. “I got my lights on clearance a couple of years ago and they’re just plain, boring white ones. These are way more fun.”</p><p>Poppy rummaged around in the final bag that, from what she could see, was filled with handfuls of ornaments. She reached in to pluck one out and shrieked as her fingers brushed against something rubbery and covered in <em>hair.</em> </p><p>“Oh my gosh, what is that?!” she cried and dropped it on the carpet. </p><p>She took a look at the offending thing on the floor and realized it was a rubber spider about the size of her hand; it was covered in hair, had two beady red eyes and was attached to an elastic ring meant for hanging. </p><p>Once the initial wave of disgust rolled away from her, Poppy gazed up at Tora, who was fighting back a smile. </p><p>“Tora, why-“</p><p>He shrugged. “It was in the clearance bin. Thought it was an ornament.”</p><p>At this, Poppy stifled a giggle. “Okay, but you know how much spiders freak me out!”</p><p>“Yeah,” he smirked at her. “Sorry, Bobby, thought it’d be funny. Here, I’ll throw it away.” </p><p>It <em>was</em> funny. </p><p>He stooped to pick the spider up, but Poppy was closer to the floor and snatched it out from under his hand.</p><p>“Nuh-uh, it’s going on the tree now,” she said and plunked it down on the coffee table.  </p><p>“Pfft, whatever you say, kid,” Tora replied as he squatted down beside her on the floor. </p><p>She brought out ornament after ornament: green and red dinosaurs, some generic Santas and snowmen, a set of sparkly orange chicken nuggets, their dipping sauces and one in particular that gripped Poppy’s attention. </p><p>At first glance, it was a simple, round white ornament with a slot in the middle for a picture. When she peered more closely at it, she noticed the words “Our First Christmas” arched over the photo border and below it, a pair of baby footprints. </p><p>Poppy’s eyes widened as she glanced sideways at Tora. </p><p>“Um… this one is cute,” she said quietly. </p><p>“Well, ya keep sayin’ it’s our first Christmas and it’s important to ya,” he said, his eyebrows quirking up at her. “Thought we could put our picture in it.”</p><p>“It is important,” she murmured. Her boyfriend truly was the sweetest man in the entire world. </p><p>“Did you know this is meant for new parents and… their baby?” she asked and pointed to the impressions of tiny feet.</p><p>Tora squinted at them and then ran a hand through his hair. “Huh, didn’t see that before,” he admitted sheepishly. “Well, ya can put a picture of the punk chicken in there until…” He trailed off quietly.</p><p>“Until?” Poppy breathed. </p><p>A dusting of pink colored Tora’s cheeks. “Until we have a person shorter than you runnin’ around here.”</p><p>Poppy’s heart thundered hard in her chest. They hadn’t even seriously discussed marriage, let alone having children. Because Tora had such an untraditional, dysfunctional background, it seemed that it might be out of the realm of possibility for them. Was it something he would ever want? </p><p>She wasn’t sure. </p><p><em>She</em> wanted it all with him but understood if he might not ever feel ready to have a family. Living through what Tora had, she imagined she would have doubts too. It wouldn’t be the end of the world if it was just the two of them for the rest of their lives. She didn’t need a ring or a child to feel secure in their relationship; she knew they loved each other and neither of them were going anywhere.</p><p>But Tora’s soft admission changed things. This… was the best early Christmas present she could have asked for. </p><p>“You… you want kids? With me?” she asked, tears brimming in her eyes. </p><p>“I know we haven’t talked about it, but yeah, I do,” he said. “Been thinkin’ about it for awhile now. Never thought I’d live to see 30 or be able to have a life with someone like ya. And now that I got it…”</p><p>His gaze was liquid gold as it met hers. </p><p>“At first, I didn’t think I had any business wantin’ to be a dad. Never knew mine, so what the hell do I know about raisin’ kids?” he said. “But… I want the chance to be a good one.”</p><p>“Can’t guarantee I won’t be complete shit at it. I’ll need a <em>lot</em> of help,” he chuckled dryly. “If I’m bein’ honest, I’m fuckin’ <em>terrified</em> of disappointing our kids. I’d never wanna let ‘em down. But I want this. I wanna try… if it’s somethin’ you want, too.”</p><p>Thin tracks of tears rolled down Poppy’s cheeks. She wanted to speak, but the words were lodged behind the lump that was swelling in her throat. </p><p>“Bobby?” Tora asked after a moment. “Whatcha think?”</p><p>She swallowed hard and smiled at him. “You’re worried about disappointing our kids?” she asked. </p><p>He nodded slowly. </p><p>“Then I think you’re <em>already</em> a good dad, Tora,” she said and pressed a kiss to his lips. “And I wouldn’t want to have kids with <em>anyone else.”</em></p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>December 24th</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora</em>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Well?” Poppy squealed, her face bright red from excitement. “What do you think?!”</p><p>Tora stared down at the three thick sweaters his girlfriend had splayed across their bed. The first was tiny, like it was made to fit an infant. It was bright green with a fuzzy white collar and the words “SANTA’S FAVORITE” were stitched across the back. The “O” in the word ‘favorite’ was replaced with a paw print. </p><p>Tora smirked. </p><p>She fucking would. </p><p>The second was dark red and across the front was layers of chubby little hamsters stacked into the shape of a Christmas tree. They all wore Santa hats and some were drinking milk, some munched on cookies and the rest were sleeping next to wrapped presents. </p><p>Pfft. Cute. </p><p>The last one was the largest. It was red and blue, dotted with white snowflakes and the image of a green, roaring T-Rex was emblazoned across the front. He was wearing a Santa hat and standing in a snow drift, where the words “CRASHING THROUGH THE SNOW” were stitched in bold, angry letters. </p><p>Fucking <em>badass.</em></p><p>“I like ‘em, Bobby. ’Specially the fuckin’ T-Rex,” he grinned as he held it out in front of him. </p><p>“Oh! You still haven’t seen the best part,” she said and fidgeted with the hem of the sweater. He heard a soft <em>click</em> as her fingers found purchase and then the snowflakes on the front lit up, blinking in random patterns of green, red, yellow and blue. </p><p>Tora snorted. </p><p>Jesus Christ. </p><p>“I thought the three of us could wear them tomorrow,” she said. “It’s just not Christmas if you don’t have on an ugly sweater.”</p><p>It wasn’t like he could argue; she was the one with all the experience in that area.</p><p>“Whatever ya say, kid.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Oh my god!” Quincey shrieked as he gazed down at the green sweater Tora was gently pulling from Callum’s tiny body. “My nephew and I match!”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes. </p><p>Quincey had come into town a day earlier than the rest of the family to celebrate. He’d booked a hotel room in town that morning, then headed straight over to their apartment to day drink, watch Christmas movies and eat dinner. </p><p>He’d come bursting through the front door with bags full of presents and ingredients to make mimosas and spiked eggnog.</p><p>Once the blonde man caught sight of Callum rushing up to greet him, Quincey had squealed and shoved all the bags into Tora’s arms. He’d then proceeded to drop to all fours on the carpet and cooed at the puppy before finally drawing himself back up to his full height to say hello to Tora.</p><p>Quincey never did anything small and Christmas was no exception. He’d walked in wearing a red Santa hat and green sweater decorated with layers of garland and small, shiny Christmas bulbs. This was apparently holiday outfit one of three that he’d brought with him. </p><p>Fucking Christ. </p><p>“Ain’t your nephew, Quince,” Tora said, carefully wiping at Callum’s wet feet with a towel. “And ya don’t match. <em>He’s</em> not shedding green fuckin’ trimmings everywhere he goes.”</p><p>“Sure, he’s not my nephew, just like <em>you’re</em> not his dad,” Quincey smirked. “You’re more careful and protective of that dog than you <em>ever</em> were with me. And you were my bodyguard!”</p><p>“Just tryin’ ta keep him alive,” Tora mumbled as he released the furry little punk in question.  He watched as Callum waddled off into the kitchen. “He means a lot to Poppy.”</p><p>“Speaking of Poppy,” Quincey said, his tone low as he watched Tora hang Callum’s harness and leash on the metal sword hanger, “are you going to propose tomorrow?”</p><p>Tora’s head snapped over to Quincey. “What? No. That’s the stupidest fuckin’ thing I ever heard of.” No <em>way</em> was he going to ask Poppy to marry him in front of her entire family. He’d barely summoned the courage to ask Quincey to go ring shopping with him.  </p><p>“Oh, come on, it would be so cute!” Quincey gushed as they moved into the living room. “You could slip the ring around Callum’s collar and have him run over to her. Or you could put the ring inside a piece of cake! Or…”</p><p>“I already got a plan, Quince,” Tora told him. “Gonna do it when we go to the beach this summer.”</p><p>His brother gasped. “How romantic! I <em>knew</em> all that beta reading you did for me would rub off on you eventually! You’re welcome.”</p><p>Tora sighed. If there was one thing Quincey didn’t do, it was change. His hand itched to thump his brother on the head, but his therapist had advised him against that kind of contact. </p><p>
  <em>If you’re experiencing feelings of annoyance or anger, try using your words to express them, Tora. Not your body.</em>
</p><p>“Came up with it on my own,” Tora bit out. “Ain’t the Neanderthal ya like to think I am.”</p><p>Quincey smiled. “I’m just teasing, honey,” he said and patted Tora’s arm. “You know how proud I am of you, right?”</p><p>Tora raked a hand through his long hair. “Yeah, yeah, yeah.”</p><p>“I mean it. You’ve come a long way and it makes me happy to know that you’re happy.”</p><p>Tora nodded once at his brother, the itch in his hand gone. “Thanks, Quince.”</p><p>"Sooo... if you're not giving Poppy the ring for Christmas, what did you get her?" Quincey asked. </p><p>Tora quietly rattled off the list of things he'd collected for her over the last couple of months: professionally framed pictures of her holding the owl at the Renaissance Fair, one of the pink leather-bound journals she'd been eyeing at the festival, a gift card to her favorite greenhouse and a small stuffed dog that looked identical to Callum. </p><p>He purposely left out the last gift he'd prepared for Poppy. It was a present that was meant only for her and hadn't required any money, just his time. </p><p>"Well, it sounds like your first Christmas is going to be a good one, Tiger Boy," Quincey grinned at him. </p><p>Fuck, he hoped so.</p><p>---</p><p>After dinner, Tora and Poppy stretched out on the couch while Quincey curled up in their recliner with Callum. She and Quincey had picked through every Christmas movie she owned before settling on <em>Elf</em> and <em>It’s a Wonderful Life.</em> The first made Poppy and Quincey laugh until they cried and the second left them weeping over their mugs of spiked eggnog. </p><p><em>Elf</em> was kind of dumb, in Tora’s opinion, but he found entertainment in the way Poppy laughed periodically and then glanced back at him to see his own reaction. Each time, he smiled lazily at her and rubbed his fingers gently over her side. </p><p>The black and white movie was better; sort of slow moving, but he liked it. Especially the end, where everyone came together to help George Bailey and his family, despite the way George had behaved. Through all the bad he believed he’d done, they saw the good in him. </p><p>As the end credits rolled, Poppy sat up on the sofa and wiped the tears from her eyes. “Do you want to watch another movie, Quincey, or are you ready to call it a night?”</p><p>His brother yawned and stretched in the chair. “I think I’m going to call it a night, honey. I’m beat.”</p><p>The three of them pushed themselves off the furniture and headed toward the door. On the way, Poppy scooped Callum up from the recliner and tucked him into his kennel for the night. </p><p>“Well, we’ll see you tomorrow morning for breakfast, right?” she asked Quincey as he began to slip on his shoes.</p><p>“Yup! I’ll be here with all of the fixings for bloody Mary’s,” the blonde man grinned. “You like pickles, right? Jonathan always garnishes ours with them.”</p><p>Poppy’s eyes grew wide as she let out a gasp. “Oh my gosh, I’m so glad you said something! I almost forgot to put the pickle on the tree.”</p><p>Over Poppy’s head, Tora and Quincey’s eyes met in confusion. </p><p>What the fuck?</p><p>“Okay, I’m definitely sticking around for this,” Quincey said as he toed his shoe off. </p><p>“The hell are ya talkin’ about, Bobby?” Tora asked as she yanked open the entryway closet and stuck her head inside. </p><p>“Oh, come on, you guys have never heard of it?” her muffled voice asked. </p><p><em>“No,”</em> the two men said in unison. </p><p>“It’s an old Christmas tradition, my family does it every ye- aha!” she hollered as she emerged from the mouth of the closet. In one of her hands was a shiny green pickle ornament. </p><p>“So the pickle ornament is the last one you hang on the tree and whoever finds it gets a prize,” she said. “Usually it’s just something small, like candy or stuff from the dollar bin if you have kids playing. We won’t have any here tomorrow, so I bought something a little more adult.”</p><p>Quincey’s eyes shone brightly. “Oooh, how fun! Can I hide the pickle?”</p><p>Tora smirked and stared down at Poppy, whose eyes flickered up at him. She bit her lip. </p><p>“Um, well, if you hide the pickle, then you won’t have a chance to win the prize.”</p><p>“Oh, that’s okay, honey,” Quincey said as he plucked the ornament from her hand. “Watching your two little blonde friends trying to find my pickle will be reward enough.”</p><p>Tora and Poppy snickered quietly as they followed Quincey into the living room. He circled the Christmas tree thoughtfully, tilting his head and staring at it from different angles. “Hmm, where do you think I should put it?” he asked.</p><p>Poppy tucked her head into Tora’s chest and shook with silent laughter as he answered, “Dunno, Quince. There’s plenty of holes; just pick one and stick it in.”</p><p>“Well,” Quincey said, his back to them, “this hole here is too small. They would notice it <em>right</em> away.”</p><p>Poppy snorted against his shirt. </p><p>“And this one is a little big and… kind of loose. I’m afraid the pickle would fall right out of it.”</p><p>Tora bit the inside of his cheek and fought to hold back his own laughter. As Quincey continued to mumble to himself, Tora lowered his head to Poppy’s ear. </p><p>“Hey Bobby, when Quincey leaves, ya wanna play hide the pickle?”</p><p>Her little body racked with giggles as she gazed up at him, her eyes full of tears. “Y-yes,” she managed to wheeze out. </p><p>“Whew, okay, I think I finally found a spot,” Quincey said from behind the tree. “I’m going to stick it in the back, the front is <em>way</em> too crowded.”</p><p>Unable to contain themselves any longer, Tora and Poppy howled with laughter. </p><p>“Wha- what’s so funny, guys?” Quincey asked as his head emerged from behind the branches. “Was it- oh… <em>Oh my god,</em> what did I just touch?! Okay, why do you have a damn <em>spider</em> on your tree?!”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Our First Christmas - Part Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>****SPOILER ALERT: there are references to a fast pass episode in this chapter****</p><p>Poppy and Tora celebrate their first official Christmas together.</p><p>Told from Poppy and Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi everyone! I'm back with the single longest update to the Stages universe EVER. This one clocked in at about 8200 words. I've been sitting on it since Wednesday and as badly as I wanted to post it immediately, I thought maybe it would be a good chaser for the season finale on Friday night (for fast passers, anyway!) </p><p>I wanted to give credit to a few people for this final part of the Christmas arc:</p><p>BegoniaRex, Tayleb87, kkearney, Zoety, TifaEsque and GeekGoddess for their suggestions/comments regarding this particular scenario,<br/>BegoniaRex, and my husband Travis for beta-reading and offering their insight,<br/>and my best friend Gaby for the song suggestion (she is a lyrical genius) and always being down to fangirl with me about Midnight Poppy Land. </p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“That these feelings won't go away<br/>
They've been knockin' me sideways<br/>
They've been knockin' me out lately<br/>
Whenever you come around me<br/>
These feelings won't go away<br/>
They've been knockin' me sideways<br/>
I keep thinking in a moment that<br/>
Time will take them away<br/>
But these feelings won't go away<br/>
These feelings won't go away”<br/>
-Citizen Cope, “Sideways”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>December 25th</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora</em>
</p><p>---</p><p>Tora couldn’t sleep.</p><p>He turned on his right side, then flipped his pillow over and flopped onto his back. He stared at the ceiling and frowned. He couldn’t get comfortable, no matter how hard he tried. Just a couple hours of rest, damnit. That’s all he wanted. </p><p>Instead of focusing on how badly he wanted to sleep and couldn’t, he shifted his thoughts to earlier in the night, when he was relaxed and enjoying himself. As annoying as he could be, it was good to see Quincey again. Even better to tease him. </p><p>They only lived a couple of hours apart, but Tora had been so used to being around him every day for most of his life and it was strange now, only occasionally hearing his tinny voice through a cell phone or seeing his face on a virtual screen. </p><p>After Quincey had left, Tora was in good spirits and scooped Poppy up over his shoulder. He’d carried his tiny, giggling girlfriend up to their bedroom and plopped her down onto the bed, where he’d proceeded to make playful love to her. </p><p>“Safe word’s ‘pickle’, Bobby,” he’d said as he lowered himself over her and they’d dissolved into fits of laughter.  </p><p>Afterwards, when Poppy was curled up against him and he was on the edge of sleep, her soft voice drifted to his ears.</p><p>“Tomorrow is going to be so much fun,” she murmured before sleep took her. “I can’t wait to see everyone. They’ve all told me they’re looking forward to getting to know you better.”</p><p>Tora’s eyes snapped open. </p><p>He was already nervous for what Christmas Day would bring; he’d tripped over himself for weeks making sure his present for Poppy was ready. He still wasn’t confident in his abilities and didn’t know if it would live up to her expectations, but the more he’d practiced, the better he felt about it. </p><p>Still nervous, but better. </p><p>But now, though they were meant to be encouraging, Poppy’s words sent shards of ice cutting through him. </p><p>Tora was no stranger to confrontation or being pushed into a corner. Through the course of his life, he’d been questioned by the likes of Vincent: “Think you’re stronger than me, boy? Think you’re better than the clan?”</p><p>Initially, his answer had been no. But after meeting Poppy and placing his trust in people like Quincey, Gyu and Lane, he realized how wrong he’d been. </p><p>Tora was then part of a large trial that took place in a small courtroom. He was squeezed into an even smaller witness box and questioned by lawyers: “Tora, is the man who subjected you to this abuse in the courtroom today? Can you please point to him?”</p><p>So effortless, to raise one large hand and point at the monster of his nightmares. </p><p>These moments, though significant, paled in comparison to the questioning he was sure to face from Poppy’s family. </p><p>Tora was fucking <em>terrified.</em></p><p>Aside from that first initial phone call all those years ago, Tora hadn’t spoken to Danae or Mirabelle and he’d only been introduced to Poppy’s granny once; it was over video chat a few months after they’d started dating. It was easier then; they had no idea who he really was or what he was capable of. He was just the man Poppy was dating and he made her happy. </p><p>He could be <em>anyone.</em></p><p>It was different now. Because the Balthuman trials had been broadcast nationwide, they knew about his associations with the mafia. What if they asked him about it? About what he’d done? What if they didn’t trust him with Poppy? </p><p>What if they convinced her that she deserved better than him? </p><p>It wasn’t like he would argue with that one. It couldn’t be easy, loving someone like him.</p><p>Like him.</p><p>
  <em>What if they didn’t like him?</em>
</p><p>Tora slammed his eyes closed against the torrent of dark thoughts raging inside his head. He squeezed Poppy closer to him and forced himself to focus on the sound of her peaceful breathing, the steady rise and fall of her warm body against his. </p><p>Eventually, rest found him. </p><p>He wasn’t sure what time it was when he jolted upright in the bed, swinging at no one in the air, his bare chest heaving and covered in sweat. Ragged breaths tore in and out of his mouth as he slowly took in his surroundings; he was in their apartment, the bedroom he shared with Poppy, who was somehow still asleep, even after his violent movements. </p><p>Tora had been somewhere much worse only moments before. </p><p>
  <em>A dirty warehouse. Bright white lights boring down from metal rafters. Poppy bound to a chair mere feet away from him, her eyes sitting too wide in her tear-stained face. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Before her stood her granny, Eleanor, but she had Vincent’s ice-cold blue eyes. In her hand was a thin, retractable silver blade, his former boss’s weapon of choice. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>An angry sneer slashed across Eleanor’s face as she regarded Tora beside her. “Think you have what it takes to make her happy, boy?” she rasped. “Think you deserve her after what you’ve done?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora wanted to speak but, no words. His tongue wouldn’t work. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Eleanor turned to Poppy. “I’d rather you be dead than with someone like him.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora couldn’t move his feet; they were cemented to the ground. Eleanor stepped forward and pressed the blade to one side of Poppy’s throat. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Poppy screamed. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He swung his arms, but couldn’t stop her from…</em>
</p><p>Tora winced as the image of Poppy’s lifeless body repeated like a broken record in his mind. </p><p>He had to get away from her, had to get up. </p><p>Had to keep her safe. </p><p>That was how he’d ended up on the living room floor, tossing and turning in front of the door, flipping his pillow over and flopping onto his back. </p><p>He sighed as he heard the soft, yipping sounds of Callum dreaming in his kennel. Tora had slid so silently into the living room that the little punk had never woken up. Now he was over there, kicking and talking shit in his sleep. </p><p>Rubbing it in Tora’s face. </p><p>Damn, what he wouldn’t give to sleep as well as a dog. </p><p>Irritated, he shifted onto his left side and in an attempt to drown Callum out, he drew a corner of the king-sized quilt over his ear. It didn’t completely silence the noises the pup was making but muffled them to a tolerable volume. </p><p>Tora had nearly drifted off when a rainbow of faded lights began pulsing against his eyelids. </p><p>His eyes flew open. </p><p>The entire Christmas tree was aglow, from top to bottom, each strand of lights blinking at him cheerfully, mockingly. The damn things were <em>supposed</em> to be on a timer during the day and then set to shut down for eight hours every night. Maybe Poppy had fucked with the settings or Quincey bumped something during his pickle fiasco. </p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched as he stared at the wall of flashing lights before him and then he swallowed hard as his gaze lifted to Ishrikhara on her perch at the top of the tree. </p><p>The lights danced around her, reds, greens, blues and yellows; at every change of color, the features of her small, ceramic face lit up. Shadows cast across her cheeks and framed her eyes to the point where, if he looked close enough at her, she was staring directly at him. Watching. Evaluating. </p><p>Judging. </p><p>
  <em>She protects the ones who have slipped beneath the cracks.</em>
</p><p>Fuck, he was <em>still</em> slipping. With every therapy session, every night terror, he fell further. </p><p>Poppy didn’t deserve a fallen angel. She deserved a man who was solid, strong and could stand on both of his feet. </p><p>Her family would certainly think so. </p><p>A lump formed in his throat as he ripped the blanket from his body and stalked over to the tree. He ripped the cord from the wall and when he settled onto the floor once more, he turned his back on that stupid fucking angel and willed himself to find sleep. </p><p>---</p><p>
  <em>Warm.</em>
</p><p>Tora was so warm. </p><p>He opened his eyes to Callum staring at him from his kennel, tail wagging expectantly. The room was lit with the dusty rose gold of sunrise filtering in through the balcony door and when he turned over to check the time on his phone, he felt a small arm wrap around his waist. </p><p>Poppy yawned from her place beside him on the floor and smiled when his eyes found hers. </p><p>“Good morning, handsome,” she said softly. “Merry Christmas.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>December 25th</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Poppy</em>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Okay,” Poppy said to Tora as she brought two steaming mugs of vanilla chai tea over to the couch, “I have to grab your last present from the bedroom. Be right back!”</p><p>She quickly scampered up the stairs and into their room, where she immediately dropped to all fours and dug for the long, awkward box under their bed. She’d wrapped it the same way she had the first painting she’d ever given to him, all those years ago: brown kraft paper and shiny, pink baker’s twine. </p><p>Poppy moved sideways down the hall, gripping the oblong box in both hands. She saw Tora’s eyes widen as she made her way down the stairs, careful not to step too suddenly. When her feet hit the carpeted floor of the living room, she pivoted and was met with Tora standing directly in front of her, trying to remove the box from her grasp. </p><p>“Shoulda told me ya were bringing this big ass box down,” he told her. “I would’ve carried it for ya.”</p><p>“No, no, it’s fine, go sit down,” she said, nodding her head in the direction of the patch of carpet in front of the Christmas tree; she squinted in confusion as she realized it wasn’t lit up like it should’ve been. “I’ve got it! It’s not too heavy, just awkward.”</p><p>Tora sighed and raised his hands in defeat before retreating to sit in front of the tree. She didn’t want him to have an opportunity to hold his gift and guess what it was until the last possible second. </p><p>She set the box down in front of Tora, who was sitting cross legged on the floor, his back to the tree. Poppy circled around to its backside and saw that the power cord had been pulled from the outlet. Maybe Quincey had bumped it when he’d been hiding his pickle?</p><p>Poppy smirked at the thought as she plugged the tree back in and was rewarded with a twinkling wall of lights. She plopped herself down in front of Tora and blew at her mug of tea, admiring the way the Christmas lights colorfully backlit the silhouette of her boyfriend. </p><p>Her heart thudded hard in her chest at the thought that she was celebrating his first Christmas with him; it was a rite of passage that she didn’t take lightly. She’d taken special care in selecting his presents and pushed back quite a bit of money to afford the gift in the long box. One gift had cost her no money at all; just her time and the memories they made together. </p><p>She hoped he liked everything. </p><p>“So,” Tora said after she’d settled herself on the floor, “ya wanna go first?”</p><p>“No, <em>you</em> first,” she said adamantly and gestured at his pile of gifts. </p><p>He smirked. “Whatever ya say, kid.”</p><p>Tora reached for the long box and balanced it over his crossed knees. Callum, already dressed in his green Christmas sweater, waddled over curiously and began tugging at the long, pink string dangling from the package. </p><p>“Get outta here, ya little punk,” he smirked at the puppy. “This is mine. Yer presents are under the tree.”</p><p>Poppy giggled as she leaned forward and scooped the Cavapoo into her arms. Callum wriggled against Poppy and once he freed himself, he charged into the kitchen. A moment later, the high-pitched squeaking of a chew toy broke through the air and Poppy laughed. </p><p>“Hopefully that keeps him occupied for a little while. Now go on, open it! Chop chop, on the double,” she said, clapping her hands at Tora eagerly. </p><p>He chuckled and pulled the baker’s twine away from the box gently, then slowly began to tear at the paper. </p><p>Poppy screamed internally. Did this man have to be so purposeful in <em>everything</em> he did? The anticipation was killing her, but she willed herself not to say a word. This was a special day for him and he deserved to navigate through it the way he wanted. </p><p>After what felt like ten years, Tora finally lifted the lid from the box. </p><p>“Holy shit,” he breathed and turned his gaze up to her, golden eyes large and round. </p><p>She smiled. “Go ahead, take it out.”</p><p>He carefully lifted the sword from its box and stood to his full height, both large hands wrapped around the bloodwood handle as he pointed the long blade to the sky. </p><p>In that moment, Poppy was overcome with the vision of how strong and fierce he looked. Not a modern-day superhero, but a warrior of Old Narin. He highly resembled pictures of those she’d seen in her history books, anyway. </p><p>She’d always thought him otherworldly and this image of him only affirmed it. </p><p>“That’s the one you wanted at the Renaissance Fair, right?” she asked softly. </p><p>“Yeah,” he said, his eyes shining brightly as he studied the blade. “How did ya-“</p><p>“Um, I <em>might</em> have snuck back over to his booth while you were in the restroom,” she giggled. “I asked him for his business card and he offered to let me pay for it in installments. I think he knew how much you liked it.”</p><p>“I do,” he said as he laid the sword on the ground and crouched down in front of her. “I love it.” He gripped her shoulders in his massive hands and pressed a long, tender kiss to her lips. “Thank you.”</p><p>“You’re welcome,” she murmured and leaned in to kiss him one more time. “But that was just your first present. You still have more to open.”</p><p>Tora chuckled as he returned to his spot on the floor. He replaced the sword in its box and slid it to the side. He reached for a small bag next, one she had found at their local dollar store. It had a picture of a chubby hamster printed on it; it was wearing a large Santa hat and throwing the peace sign. </p><p>“Cute,” he smiled and lowered his hand inside.</p><p>Tora sighed and narrowed his eyes as he removed the extra-large t-shirt from the gift bag; it was charcoal gray and the words “FUR DAD” were printed in bold, white lettering across the front. </p><p>Poppy cackled as he folded it up and quickly returned it to the bag. “I’ll wear it,” he grumbled, “but I ain’t that thing’s dad.”</p><p>“Sure, sure, whatever you say,” Poppy laughed. </p><p>Tora leaned forward and grabbed a small box she’d wrapped in zoo print paper. He tore it open gingerly and then popped the top off the box. Inside was a four-inch statue of a white tiger advancing down a stony hill. </p><p>“It’s one of the Feng Shui celestial animals,” she told him as he turned it over in his hands. “Like your tortoise. I printed out its history for you; the papers are in the bottom of the box. You can read them later, if you want.”</p><p>“Fuckin’ <em>badass,”</em> he said and set the tiger on the coffee table, its body facing his. “Thanks, sweetheart.”</p><p>Poppy’s breath halted in her throat as he plucked his last gift from the floor. It was the one she’d poured her heart and soul into, the one he had helped her create without even realizing it. </p><p>Tora gingerly tore the tissue paper from the journal. It was one of her favorites; white leather with watercolor images of blush pink and green succulents screened across it. He flipped it open to the middle and she watched him read through it for a string of silent moments. </p><p>Finally, he looked up at her, his eyes liquid gold. “Is… is this…”</p><p>Tears pricked at her own eyes. “Um, yeah. It’s us.”</p><p>Poppy had started keeping the journal shortly after they moved into the witness protection apartment together. Initially, it had been a way of entertaining herself; because of the extensive safety measures that had been put into place, they weren’t allowed to freely go wherever they pleased or do just <em>anything</em> that they wanted. </p><p>So she’d begun to write. </p><p>One entry every day. </p><p>She wrote about everything they were going to do when the trials were over, because one day they <em>would</em> be over and they would be free. She wrote about going for unsupervised walks in the park, moving into their very own apartment, visiting the beach. </p><p>At some point, she’d realized this journal was no longer just an outlet for her boredom. It was a series of love letters to Tora. </p><p>The next time she sat down to write an entry, she began it with <em>Dear Tora.</em></p><p>Poppy included everything in these letters: the silly games they came up with to pass the time in the apartment. Chasing each other through the bare rooms, playfully wrestling to the ground and then making love wherever they landed. Inside jokes. How much the nights spent curled up with him on the couch meant to her; she never saw them as stifling or boring but comforting, grounding. She knew where he was and he was <em>safe.</em> </p><p>How she felt when he admitted that <em>Pride and Prejudice</em> was his favorite movie. Sneaking out into the living room some nights and watching over him while he slept in front of the door.</p><p>The night he’d finally trusted himself enough to share a bed with her again. He’d made love to her twice and each time had felt like the first. </p><p>Reading out loud to him. Taking care of their plants. Tora tracing words across her bare skin with his fingers and her trying to guess what they were. Never talking about marriage, but never feeling the need to. They would be together no matter what. </p><p>Opening up to him about her father. Tora opening up about his father figure, a man named Joe. </p><p>Moving into their new apartment. Going to the Renaissance Fair. Adopting Callum. Planning their first Christmas. Making the decision to have children. </p><p>It all led up to this moment; she’d written the final entry last night, right before she’d come to sleep beside him on the living room floor. </p><p>He was holding it all right there, her bare heart in his hands. </p><p>Tora was quiet as he continued to slowly flip through the pages he’d helped her write. When he finally looked back up at her, his eyes were shiny with tears. </p><p>He raked a hand through his long, black hair. “I… uh- I dunno what to say. No one’s ever- The… the time we spent together in that apartment? I always saw it as this horrible thing. And you changed it. Ya just gave it <em>back</em> to me."</p><p>Before Poppy could blink, she felt herself being engulfed in a six foot three hug. His arms wound around her back and his legs opened to straddle her lower body. She gripped him tightly as tears fell freely down her cheeks. </p><p>Tora held her there, knotted around her curves and then pulled back to cup his hands around her face. He kissed her once, twice and leaned his forehead into hers. His eyes were the color of warm, melted honey. “Thank you,” he whispered against her mouth. “Thank you. <em>I love you.”</em></p><p>“I love you, too,” she murmured back. 	</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>December 25th</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora</em>
</p><p>---</p><p>Okay. </p><p>How the <em>fuck</em> did you follow the perfect gift?</p><p>Tora gazed down at the small pile of presents beside Poppy, all stuffed in gift bags, because fuck if he knew how to use wrapping paper. They didn’t even <em>mean</em> something to him. Or to her. He’d literally grabbed a handful of them when she’d sent him out shopping that one day and stuffed them into his cart. </p><p>There was a generic Santa, one of kids building an impossibly tall snowman and… what did that one say? He squinted. </p><p><em>Men in Black?</em> </p><p>The fuck?</p><p>Why didn’t he pay more attention?</p><p>She’d been so thoughtful; fucking hamsters and wrapping the sword the way she did his beach painting three years ago. </p><p>There was one present he couldn’t wrap and he hoped it meant everything to her. </p><p>That journal though… a papery collection of their memories, held together by a strong spine. </p><p>Nothing could top that. </p><p>“Okay,” Poppy said, rubbing her hands together, “which one should I open first?”</p><p>“You pick,” he told her. He’d save the best one for last. </p><p>Her big brown eyes roamed over each bagged gift and then she finally reached for the <em>Men in Black</em> one. </p><p>As she took in the sight of the two guys in suits on it, she cackled madly. </p><p>“Oh my gosh, this was one of my favorite movies growing up!” she squeaked out around her giggles. “The aliens were so <em>gross.”</em></p><p>Pfft. He’d never seen it. Especially not as a kid, but he was glad his carelessness in choosing gift bags had brought a smile to her face. </p><p>As though she’d read his mind, she continued. “We’ll have to watch it sometime. It’s pretty funny.”</p><p>He nodded and watched as her tiny hands dove into the bag. </p><p><em>”Oh,”</em> Poppy breathed as she brought out the small stuffed Cavapoo. “It’s our baby!”</p><p>The words <em>”I told ya I ain’t that thing’s dad”</em> balanced on the tip of his tongue, but Tora bit them back. </p><p>As if he was aware that he was being talked about, the little punk wandered over to Poppy’s side and sniffed curiously at his toy counterpart. </p><p>“Look, Cal, it’s you!” she cooed. Callum immediately grabbed at the stuffed animal with his mouth and Poppy laughed before wrenching the toy away. “Um, I said it’s you. It’s not <em>for</em> you, silly.”</p><p>She rocked to the side and plucked a plush avocado toy from the floor. She squeaked it a couple of times to get his attention and then tossed it a few feet away. Callum galloped after it and began attacking it with his prickly little teeth. </p><p>“Hopefully he’ll stay distracted,” she giggled and then clutched the stuffed dog to her chest. “Thank you. I love it.”</p><p>“Welcome,” Tora grinned and slid the other presents toward her. “Still got more to open, sweetheart.”</p><p>Poppy selected the largest bag next and <em>squealed</em> as she pulled out the two framed prints of herself holding the owl at the Renaissance Fair. </p><p>“Oh my gosh, Tora!” she cried as she ran her hands over the glass faces of the photos. She blinked up at him, her eyes glossy with tears. “I love these <em>so much.</em> I can’t wait to hang them!”</p><p>She studied the images for a while longer, then gently set them to the side. She took the last bag into her hands and lifted the pink, leather-bound journal out. </p><p>“Oooh,” she murmured and skimmed her fingers across the cover. </p><p>“Looks like we had the same idea,” she giggled. “This is from the booth at the Ren Fair, right?”</p><p>“Mmmhmm.”</p><p>“I already know <em>exactly</em> what I’m going to write in it,” Poppy said and shifted her body forward to give him a kiss. </p><p>“There’s somethin’ inside, too,” he told her as she sat back. “Should be tucked in the middle.”</p><p>She lifted an eyebrow at him and then eagerly flipped through the journal’s pages. When she found the gift card to her favorite greenhouse nestled against the spine, she held it up triumphantly. </p><p>“Ah, I can’t wait to use this!” she said. “I’ve had my eye on a triostar stromanthe for <em>months.”</em></p><p>Tora chuckled as the complicated name fell easily from her lips. Even after three years, he had yet to reach her level of plant nerdiness. </p><p>Poppy pushed herself forward and crawled on all fours toward him. “This is the best Christmas I’ve ever had, thank you so much.” She placed her tiny hands on his cheeks and pulled him in for a long, slow kiss. “I love you.”</p><p>“Love you too. But… I got one more thing for ya. Couldn’t wrap it,” he told her softly. “Be right back.”</p><p>Tora stood and strode into the entryway of their apartment. He pulled open the storage closet door and lifted his guitar out. It wasn’t the same one he’d had all those years ago. In a fit of anger and hurt, he’d hurled <em>that</em> particular one against the wall and in doing so, smashed the first plant Poppy had ever given him.</p><p>After that, Tora hadn’t wanted to repair it; he didn’t want it hanging around as a reminder of how easily he’d lost his temper and nearly destroyed something so precious. He’d thrown it out and immediately replaced it with a newer acoustic guitar. Different brand, different color, different everything. </p><p>A reminder of how different he wanted to be from the way he was. </p><p>Tora returned to his place on the floor and settled the guitar across his knees. He gripped the neck in one hand. </p><p>“Tora…” Poppy breathed, barely a whisper. </p><p>Shit, now that he was here, sitting in front of her, his fingers hovering over the guitar strings, he was nervous as hell. He’d never played for anyone before; no one had ever asked him to. </p><p>But she did and so he would. </p><p>Tora had lost count of how many times he’d tuned the guitar over the last week. He’d asked Gyu for help looking up video tutorials online for the song he’d chosen and then he’d started practicing at his coworker Avery’s house.</p><p>Over a month of online lessons and playing consistently, his confidence had grown quite a bit. He felt better about chord changes and strumming while singing at the same time. </p><p>But now? Sitting in front of this wide-eyed little hamster, knowing how closely she was going to be listening… Tora could feel sweat breaking out on the back of his neck and his hands were beginning to tremble. </p><p>He swallowed hard. </p><p>He could fucking do this. Maybe not well, but he was going to try. </p><p>Tora had chosen a song he’d heard her play often as she cooked them dinner or lounged in the bathtub. It was one of her favorites and after he’d listened to it a few times, he didn’t think it was that bad. </p><p>It reminded him of her. </p><p>He took a deep breath, released it slowly and began to play. </p><p><em>”You know it ain’t easy,”</em> he sang, fighting to keep his voice from shaking. <em>”For these thoughts here to leave me…”</em></p><p><em>”No words to describe it, in French or in English…”</em> </p><p><em>”’Cause diamonds they fade and flowers they-“</em> </p><p>His finger skipped over one of the strings; the guitar emitted a sharp squeal and he winced. </p><p>“Shit,” he grumbled. </p><p>Tora paused and glanced up at Poppy. Little hamster was bawling her eyes out with her hands clasped tightly together in her lap. </p><p>“Keep going,” she whispered. “Please.”</p><p>He threw her a small smile and picked up where he left off. </p><p>
  <em>”Flowers they bloom and I’m tellin’ you…”</em>
</p><p><em>”That these feelings won’t go away… They’ve been knockin’ me sideways, they’ve been knockin’ me out-</em> fuck <em>-lately… Whenever you come around me…”</em></p><p>Tora made his way through the song, cursing at the little mistakes he made but not letting them give him cause to stop. By the time he’d finished, he felt like he’d run a marathon. He couldn’t catch his breath. </p><p>No sooner had he set the guitar down beside him, his tiny, sobbing girlfriend was throwing herself into his lap. </p><p><em>”Thank you,”</em> she cried into his ear. “It was so beautiful, thank you so much. I love you, I love you, <em>I love you.”</em></p><p>“S’nothin’,” Tora mumbled into her neck, but even as he said it, he knew he was wrong. </p><p>It was everything. </p><p>---</p><p>Quincey was in rare fucking form. </p><p>He’d strolled into their apartment around ten that morning in a red velvet blazer, his arms bogged down with grocery bags filled with ingredients for the bloody Mary’s he’d promised, all of the fixings to make Western omelets and every type of cookie under the sun. </p><p>Quincey took one look at Poppy, Tora and Callum in their Christmas sweaters and emitted the loudest shriek Tora had ever heard come out of his mouth. </p><p>“You’re the cutest little family ever! Okay, well, now I <em>have</em> to go change,” his brother told them matter-of-factly. “This thing is far too formal.”</p><p>He’d emerged from the bathroom two minutes later in a fuzzy, leopard print sweater with the words “MERRY DRUNK I’M CHRISTMAS” stitched on it in large, bubble letters. Quincey fiddled with the hem of the shirt and when he pulled his hand away, the words flashed with bright, dizzying colored lights. </p><p>While Tora had narrowed his eyes, Poppy laughed and praised the blonde man. “Quincey, I love it! Where did you buy it? I saw that Target had a really cute line of Christmas sweaters this ye-“</p><p>“Oh honey, please,” Quincey cut her off with one hand. “You can’t find something this fabulous off the rack. I had it custom made! Jonathan has a matching one.”</p><p>“How’s he doing?” Poppy asked. “You said he was in the Netherlands visiting family, right?”</p><p>“Shoulda gone with him,” Tora said with a smirk.</p><p>Quincey cocked his head at Tora and grinned. “As if I was going to miss out on my big bro’s first Christmas.”</p><p>After they’d finished breakfast, the three of them settled down in front of the tree to exchange gifts. Quincey insisted Callum receive his first and proceeded to dump a pile of toys on the floor, including a leopard print tennis ball and a squeaky, stuffed tiger. Tora scowled while Poppy and his brother laughed. </p><p>When Poppy brought out her gifts for Quincey- a painting of the three of them she’d based off a photo and a framed picture of Quincey cuddling Callum the day he met him- fat tears streamed down his brother’s face and he hugged Poppy for a long time while he blubbered. </p><p>“Thank you, honey,” he cried. “I miss you guys so much and I’ll love seeing your faces every day. Even Tora’s.”</p><p>Tora snorted and after Quincey disentangled himself from Poppy, Tora thrust a gift bag at Quincey. When he pulled out one of the leather-bound journals from the Ren Fair booth and a nice calligraphy pen, Poppy beamed at him. </p><p>“Oh, now we match!” she said to Quincey. “Tora got me a pink journal.”</p><p>“Didn’t have any cheetah spotted ones, sorry,” Tora smirked. </p><p>“Honey, it’s <em>leopard print</em> and don’t be sorry, this is <em>perfect,”</em> he said dreamily and flipped through it. </p><p>“Isn’t it?” Poppy asked as she hovered over the journal. “They’re handmade; look at the stitching here…”</p><p>Tora smiled as he watched them fawn together over the leather book. </p><p>Fucking nerds. </p><p>---</p><p>Quincey booked Poppy an all-inclusive spa day and got her something else he wouldn’t allow Tora to see. Quincey had marched her into their bedroom to gift it to her secretly and when they came out, Poppy’s face was screeching red. </p><p>Before Tora could ask her what the hell was going on, Poppy took a phone call from her granny, probably letting her know she was on her way. </p><p>While she chatted with Eleanor in the kitchen, Tora cornered Quincey in the living room. </p><p>“Quinceton, what did ya do to make Poppylan-“</p><p>Quincey silenced him by shoving an envelope into his large hand.</p><p>“Merry Christmas,” his younger brother said. </p><p>Tora glowered at him a moment, not exactly thrilled for a change of subject, but opened it anyway. He pulled out a flashy Christmas card and inside of it was a business card. </p><p>“Uh… thanks?” Tora said, his eyebrows furrowed together. </p><p>“That is a card for my personal travel agent,” Quincey informed him. “When you and Poppy are ready to take your honeymoon, give them a call. They know to bill it to me.”</p><p>Tora gaped at him. “Quince, s’too much. I haven’t even <em>asked</em> her yet…”</p><p>“No. But you’re <em>going</em> to ask her, she’s <em>going</em> to say yes and you’ll go on your first big trip together worry-free.” Quincey met his eyes. “Wherever you want. It’s on me.”</p><p>Tora swallowed hard as the words on the business card blurred together. He blinked back the tears that were threatening to spill over. </p><p>Since when the fuck did he cry this much?</p><p>“Uh, dunno what to say,” he mumbled, raking a hand through his hair. </p><p>“You don’t have to say anything.”</p><p>“Thank Christ,” Tora said and turned away from him. </p><p><em>”Actually,”</em> Quincey chirped in a singsong voice. “I changed my mind. You can say, ‘I love you, I miss you and you’re magical.’”</p><p>Tora waggled the fingers of his right hand; it was itching to thump his brother again. </p><p>“Fuck you,” Tora grumbled.</p><p>Quincey barked out a laugh. “You know I could have the travel agent book a third ticket for me, right?” </p><p>Tora sighed. “I love you, I miss you and yer magical.”</p><p>Quincey smirked. “Why don’t you tell me something I don’t know?”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes but couldn’t stop the corners of his mouth from tilting upwards. “Thanks, Quincey. I mean it.”</p><p>“You’re welcome. I love you too.”</p><p>---</p><p>For Tora, the apartment had never felt smaller. </p><p>By lunch time, everyone had shown up: Eleanor arrived with Danae and Mirabelle and Gyu had walked through the door shortly after. In the end, it was only an extra five people taking up space in their home; it wasn’t like they were stacked on top of each other, but Tora was having trouble breathing. </p><p>Alice couldn’t make it; she was currently in the hospital recovering from open heart surgery. Tora and Poppy had visited her a couple of days before Christmas and brought her flowers, a box of her favorite hot tea and a framed picture of the two of them. </p><p>The old lady looked fragile as she laid there smiling, hooked up to different monitors, but not fragile enough to hold back from whacking Tora upside the head when he leaned down for an awkward hug. </p><p>Tora sighed. He wished the old bat was here right now; he’d put up with her constant sassing and nagging if it meant she would help him navigate his way through this. </p><p>He was flailing, drowning in this sea of shit he knew nothing about, but he was going to try. </p><p>He’d taken Eleanor’s coat when she’d settled herself inside and bent down to accept a hug from her. He hadn’t been expecting that. </p><p>When Poppy greeted her at the door, the two shorter women had burst into tears, giggling and exclaiming how much they missed each other. Tora had looked on from the hallway; he could see where Poppy got the qualities he loved most about her. </p><p>Danae and Mirabelle were… everything he expected and then some. </p><p>Drinks in hand, they had cornered him in the living room and loudly rehashed the phone call where they’d first spoken to him. They told him awkward stories about Poppy from childhood and at the end of their conversation, they’d <em>vaguely</em> threatened to maim him if he did anything to hurt their friend. </p><p>They were feisty, stubborn, protective women and Tora smiled at the thought. Poppy had definitely picked up a thing or two from them as well. </p><p>As it turned out, Danae and Mirabelle were easier to talk to one on one. </p><p>Tora was sitting on the couch, giving Poppy space to catch up with her grandmother when Danae plopped herself down beside him. </p><p>“So Tora, are you still in…”</p><p>Tora sucked in his breath. How was she going to finish that sentence? </p><p>
  <em>”Are you still involved with the mafia?” “Are you still in touch with people from the clan?”</em>
</p><p>“…private security?” Danae asked. </p><p>Tora’s jaw unclenched as he nodded at her. “Yeah. Work for a company that’s just a few miles up the road.”</p><p>“Oh, great! I don’t know if Pops told you, but my boyfriend, Matt, just recently left the military and is looking for a position in the field. Would you mind if he used you as a reference?”</p><p>Tora offered her a small smile. “Sure, got ya phone? I’ll give you my number.”</p><p>Danae punched it into her phone quickly and then tucked it back into her pocket. “Thank you so much! He was really looking forward to coming here and meeting you in person, but his grandma is sick, so he’s spending the holidays with his family. Poppy’s told us so much about you…”</p><p>Doubt trickled away from Tora as he sat and made light conversation with Poppy’s friend. It was refreshing to be accepted by someone who meant so much to her. </p><p>Danae eventually excused herself to grab some food and Mirabelle soon took her place. She quietly began asking questions about Gyu and Tora snorted. </p><p>“Ya like him or somethin’?” he asked her. </p><p>“Well, yeah. He’s freaking <em>cute.</em> I want to talk to him, but I have no idea where to start. He’s your friend, right? Any ideas?” Mirabelle replied. </p><p>“Uh… he’s sort of a nerd. Likes video games. Maybe lead with that.”</p><p>“Oh my god, <em>perfect.</em> I’m a huge gamer. Thanks, Tora! Wish me luck,” she said. As she pushed herself away from the couch and sauntered over to where Gyu stood, Tora glanced up and noticed Poppy smiling in his direction. </p><p>He grinned back.</p><p>Maybe he could do this after all. </p><p>---</p><p>An hour later, Quincey was several drinks in and complaining that Gyu was a cheater. </p><p>“He found my pickle <em>so fast,”</em> his brother whined. “I just know he moved it up higher so Ellie and the girls didn’t have a chance; they’re so short and they couldn’t reach it.”</p><p>Tora’s eyebrows rose. Since when had Quincey started calling Poppy’s granny “Ellie”?</p><p>Gyu gaped at him. “Did ya ever stop and think that maybe you weren’t the best pickle hider in the world, bro? The most logical place to hide it is the back. You would see it too easily from the front. Ya pickle is small but it ain’t invisible…”</p><p>Tora and Poppy bit back their laughter as Quincey and Gyu continued to argue. Eventually Poppy was able to compose herself and spoke up. </p><p>“Well, the prize is something we can all share,” she told them. “It’s a Rumchata cake I bought from the bakery down the street. We can have it for dessert.”</p><p>This seemed to satisfy both men. Gyu retreated into the living room to play video games with Mirabelle and Quincey took a couple of steps toward Tora, who was leaning into the door frame. </p><p>“The hell ya doin’, Quince?” Tora grumbled as he tried to angle himself away from his brother’s close proximity. </p><p>“We’re under the mistletoe, booboo,” Quincey chirped and pointed at the bundle of Christmas berries hanging above their heads. “Gonna give me a smooch?”</p><p>Tora shoved the younger man away from him. “The fuck outta here, ya drunk.”</p><p>“Whoa, okay, okay,” Quincey said and threw his hands up in surrender. Then he shot Tora a shit-eating grin. <em>“Keep your shirt on,</em> bro.”</p><p>Poppy snorted and high-fived Quincey, who was cackling like a maniac. </p><p>Tora sighed.</p><p>Christ, were they <em>ever</em> going to let that go?</p><p>---</p><p>As usual, Quincey was the life of the party. </p><p>From the doorway, Tora watched with his arms crossed as his younger brother coaxed the four little women into taking tequila shots with him. They all laughed and clinked their glasses together before slamming the alcohol back. Quincey perked up as some obnoxious, bouncy Christmas song came over the radio and he grabbed Eleanor’s hand. </p><p>Eleanor laughed as Quincey proceeded to twirl her in circles and dip her slightly backwards. She patted the blonde man on the cheek and Tora overheard her say to Poppy that “this young man was a hoot.”</p><p>Tora wouldn’t deny it. </p><p>He was fucking jealous and for the first time in awhile, he was craving a goddamn cigarette.</p><p><em>He</em> was the one she should be laughing with and approving of. Tora wasn’t one for dancing or making a spectacle of himself, but he wanted her to have fun with him. Wanted her to trust him. Wanted her to say something nice about him to Poppy. </p><p>Tora had been giving Poppy and her granny a wide berth to catch up and spend time together; it had been months since they’d last seen each other. At some point he wanted to talk to her alone and he’d know when the time was right.</p><p>He just wanted to know what Eleanor thought of him.</p><p>If she’d give him her blessing to marry Poppy.</p><p>It was about that time his tiny girlfriend wandered over to him; her ponytail was disheveled and stray strands of her hair were plastered to her sweaty forehead. Her cheeks were flushed red from the alcohol and her eyes shone brightly at him. </p><p>She tilted her head up at him expectantly. </p><p>“Whatcha want, punk?” Tora smiled and tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear. </p><p>“First, I wanna know if you’re having fun.”</p><p>“Sure. S’nice seein’ everyone again and meetin’ your family and friends. Officially, anyway.”</p><p>“Mmm,” she hummed and leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist. Tora responded in kind and pulled her tightly to his chest. “It seemed like you were getting along with Dani and Bells?”</p><p>“Yeah, they’re nice girls,” he told her. “Haven’t had a chance to talk to yer granny yet. Fuckin’ Quincey’s been hoggin’ her all day.”</p><p>Poppy laughed. “Don’t worry, tiger. You’ll get your turn.”</p><p>She peered up at him then and licked her lips. “Can I get a kiss?” she asked. “We’re under the mistletoe, after all.”</p><p>“Pfft, sure. But <em>only</em> ‘cuz we’re under the mistletoe,” he chuckled and lowered his head to press a kiss to her mouth.</p><p>“I’m gonna go see if Gyu’s fallen in love with Mirabelle yet,” Poppy giggled after they parted. “I’ll be back.”</p><p>Not five minutes after she’d flounced away, her granny took Poppy’s place in front of Tora.</p><p>---</p><p>At first, Eleanor said nothing; she simply gazed up at Tora and smiled. Hesitantly, he smiled back. </p><p>Then, the smile never leaving her face, she raised one hand and tapped her cheek with one finger. </p><p>Pfft. People <em>really</em> liked that mistletoe.</p><p>Awkwardly, eyes wide, Tora stooped down and pressed a quick kiss to the old woman’s cheek. </p><p>“So, Poppy tells me this is your first Christmas celebrating with family,” Eleanor said. “Are you enjoying yourself?”</p><p>Tora cleared his throat. What was it about tiny women that made him so nervous? </p><p>“Uh, yeah. But not as much as Quincey is,” Tora replied, nodding at the blonde man who was currently trying to convince Poppy to climb onto his shoulders. </p><p>Eleanor glanced back and laughed. “Quincey certainly is the life of the party, isn’t he?”</p><p>“He’s somethin’, all right,” Tora grumbled. </p><p>“You know, I used to think that was the most important thing,” she told him. “Smoking, drinking, making sure everyone was having a good time. The usual party shit. It wasn’t until Poppy’s father passed away that I realized life was more precious than just partying it away. I didn’t <em>need</em> to be the center of attention to enjoy what mattered most.”</p><p>“You know what I started doing instead?” Eleanor asked him. </p><p>Tora shook his head. </p><p>“I started looking out for the people I cared about. If they drank too much, they had a place to stay on my couch. If they were hungry, they had my kitchen. If they were hurting, they had my attention, if they wanted it. And if they didn’t, they had my respect for their space.”</p><p>“I know a fellow giver when I see one, Tora,” she continued. “You’ve been giving me time with my granddaughter today, haven’t you? That’s what you’ve been doing, right?”</p><p>He nodded slowly. “Poppy misses ya and I just thought…”</p><p>Eleanor took his large hands in her own small, wrinkled ones. “I appreciate that, Tora. So much. But you know what I appreciate even more? You being here. You saving her <em>life.”</em></p><p>Tora swallowed hard. Had Poppy told her about everything they’d been through? About Kane? She’d never mentioned that she talked to Eleanor about it. He honestly didn’t think she ever would. </p><p>“I’m not sure if he was supposed to say anything… he’s a bit drunk,” Eleanor chuckled. “But Quincey told me what you did for my granddaughter. He didn’t go into great detail, but it was enough for me to know that she wouldn’t be standing here today if it weren’t for you.”</p><p>
  <em>Quincey.</em>
</p><p>Of course. </p><p>“I- uh… I’m sorry she was ever in that position in the first place,” Tora murmured. “If it weren’t for me bein’ in the maf-“</p><p>Eleanor cut him off. “You know, I used to worry about what Poppy would do once I’m gone. Who she was going to lean on, who was going to be there for her. But because of you, <em>I don’t have to worry anymore.</em> I know she’s going to be okay.”</p><p>Tora swiped at a tear forming in the corner of his eye. Fuck, if he cried <em>one</em> more time today…</p><p>“Thank you,” she smiled at him. “You’re a good man.”</p><p>
  <em>A good man.</em>
</p><p>In his life, few people had used those words to describe him. Poppy. Quincey. Gyu. Even Goliath and Lane, in their own ways. </p><p>He was relieved to finally be able to add Eleanor to that list. </p><p>He cleared his throat again. “Well… yer a good granny,” he mumbled and Eleanor barked out a laugh. </p><p>“You don’t have to kiss my ass, hon,” she said. “I already like you.”</p><p>Pfft.</p><p>They were quiet for a few seconds and finally Tora felt those words he’d been holding onto spring free from his mouth. </p><p>“Um, I dunno when I’ll see ya next and I wanted to ask you in person,” he said. He took a deep breath. “I wanna ask Poppylan to marry me. When we go to the beach this summer. Does- is that somethin’ that would be… okay with you?”</p><p>Shit, were those the magic words? Did he ask them right?</p><p>After a moment, Tora realized he must have because Eleanor started crying and tugged him down for a hug. </p><p>---</p><p>Later that night, after Tora made sure Danae, Mirabelle, Eleanor and Gyu had safely gotten into cabs and were on their way back to their hotels, he came inside and put a very tired, drunk Poppy to bed. He set a tall glass of water on her nightstand and as he went to tuck her in, she looped her arms around his neck and tried to entice him with sloppy, open-mouthed kisses. </p><p>“Pops, sweetheart, ya drunk,” he chuckled as he extracted himself from her grip. “We can do that tomorrow, if yer not too hungover.”</p><p>“Mmmkay,” she finally relented. She closed her eyes and turned over onto her side. “I love you,” she breathed. “And Dani loves you. And Bells loves you. And… Granny loves you…”</p><p>She was drunk, but nevertheless it felt good to hear her confirm what he’d been wondering all day. </p><p>“Love you too. Be right back.”</p><p>Tora withdrew a quilt Eleanor had made for Poppy from their bedroom closet and padded downstairs, where Quincey was passed out on the couch with Callum grasped tightly against his chest. </p><p>The Cavapoo whined as Tora approached and he chuckled. “I’ll save ya in just a minute,” he whispered to the puppy. He had half a mind to leave him there as punishment; if that little shit didn’t stop eating his shoes…</p><p>Tora spread the blanket over the blonde man and then gently pulled Callum from Quincey’s grip. Quincey mumbled something incoherent in his sleep and rolled over onto his stomach.</p><p>He took the pup outside to go potty and then tucked him into his kennel for the night. As Tora turned to click off the hallway light, a flash of something blue on the living room floor caught his eye. </p><p>As he peered closer, he realized it was the Christmas angel, lying on her side.</p><p>Tora crossed the room and picked her up. She hadn’t been there before he’d taken Callum outside. </p><p>Maybe Quincey had bumped the tree in his sleep?</p><p>Tora studied the ceramic figure for a moment; she was a foot tall but felt small in his hands. Like he could hold onto her with no problems at all. </p><p>No doubts. </p><p>When his gaze roamed over her face, her painted eyes, he didn’t look away.</p><p>Quietly, so as not to disturb his sleeping brother, Tora stepped toward the Christmas tree and put Ishrikhara back where she belonged.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>**Contains spoiler**</p><p>A special shout out to BegoniaRex for helping me come up with the idea for Poppy's journal to Tora. I definitely teared up while writing that part and I blame her 10,000% :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Heal</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Tora struggles with injuries, old and new.</p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>**WARNING: There is implied child abuse/violence in this chapter**</p><p>Oof, this one took days of contemplating, writing and grappling with my own emotions. Tora angst just does something really special to me lol. I hope you all enjoy this one!</p><p>I wanted to give credit to a few people for this installment:</p><p>BegoniaRex for being a brilliant beta-reader, as well as my own personal counselor while writing this one shot,<br/>my best friend Gaby for giving this Cowardly Lion courage to write this in the way I wanted and<br/>Zoety, GeekGoddess, Fox Fire413 and ItsMeKessy2011924 for their suggestions/comments regarding this particular scenario.</p><p>I highly recommend the song "Your Beating Heart" by Brendan James; it's too perfect for this latest chapter!<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LsJEKR9WAVQ</p><p>I just have to say, as much as I enjoy writing angst, I absolutely cannot WAIT to write the next oneshot; it's one that was highly requested and I hope I do the day justice ;) </p><p>Thank you for still being here; I hope you're all safe, happy and healthy! </p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>Session 1</strong>: <em>”Emotions aren’t something you should squash or try to change, Tora. They are vital sources of information from your psyche. You should listen to them.”</em></p><p>---</p><p>“Um, Tora?” Poppy’s voice drifted across the hall.</p><p>“Yeah, sweetheart?” Tora called from their bedroom. He was wearing his boxers and laying in bed; the tv was on low and he was tapping at a game on his phone, waiting for her to join him.</p><p>“Would you please come here for a second?”</p><p>At this, Tora perked up and paused the game before tossing his phone onto the comforter. He swung his long legs out of bed and padded across the room.</p><p>Normally when Poppy recruited him into the bathroom, it was either for shower sex or to help doctor her up after she’d cut herself shaving. He highly doubted it was the former. She’d already taken a shower; he’d heard the metallic squeak of the lever as she’d turned it off.</p><p>Tora sucked in his breath, fully preparing himself to walk into what looked like a crime scene; it wouldn’t be the first time his clumsy girlfriend had bled all over the tiled floor and probably not the last.</p><p>When he reached the bathroom, the door was closed so he rapped on it softly. “Okay to come in?” he asked.</p><p>“Uh huh.”</p><p>Tora pushed the door open and was met with the sight of his tiny girlfriend wearing nothing but a large, fluffy towel and the color red on her cheeks. Her long, damp hair cascaded down her back and she brushed a few strands out of her eyes as she looked at him.</p><p>“Would you mind grabbing that package of pads for me?” Poppy asked as she pointed to the open door of the top cabinet in the wall. “I can’t reach them.”</p><p>Tora snorted as he stepped into the room. “Ya don’t say, shorty. Why are they all the way up there?”</p><p>“I honestly don’t know! I think I was just unpacking bags from the store the other day and tossed them up there with the cotton balls. There just wasn’t much room in the bottom cabinet and I- okay, stop laughing at me!” she huffed at him.</p><p>“I didn’t want to bother you, I know you were comfy in bed, but I’ve tried everything outside of dragging a dining chair in here. I tried jumping, looping a towel behind it…”</p><p>Tora laughed harder. <em>Jumping.</em> That explained the bright blush on her face.</p><p>“Wanna show me how you were jumpin’, Bobby?” he smirked.</p><p>Poppy scowled up at him and pulled the towel tighter across her chest. “No, you old perv! Will you <em>please</em> just help me so I can get ready for bed?”</p><p>Christ, she was fucking cute.</p><p>“Okay, okay, I’ll grab it for ya,” he chuckled and moved past her to reach into the cabinet. Tora pulled the plastic package down and held it just out of her reach. “But-“</p><p>Poppy rolled her eyes. “Of course. What do you want?”</p><p>Tora lowered his head so it was level with hers and he tapped his lips with two fingers.</p><p>The corners of Poppy’s mouth curled up in a grin. She leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his lips.</p><p>“Thank you,” she said and grabbed the package from his grip. “Now scram, you big thug.”</p><p>The door latched shut behind him and Tora chuckled as he made his way back to bed. He climbed in and instead of picking up his phone to resume his game, he quietly pulled open the drawer of his nightstand and scooped up the pink ring box tucked inside.</p><p>Tora opened it and regarded the ring for a moment; in just a week, he was going to be asking that feisty, bossy, gorgeous, five foot nothing woman if he could help her reach things in the top cabinet for the rest of his life.</p><p>He hoped she’d let him.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Two Weeks Later</strong>
</p><p>“Tora, what the <em>hell</em> do you think you’re doing?”</p><p>From his place on the middle rungs of the ladder, Tora peered down at Poppy. She was glaring up at him with her tiny hands on her hips.</p><p>“What’s it look like I’m doin’?” he huffed back and gestured at the light fixture above his head. “Changing out these fuckin’ dim ass lightbulbs so you can see what the hell you’re doing while ya work.”</p><p>“Uh uh. Get down from there. I can do that myself.”</p><p>“Like I’m gonna let <em>your</em> clumsy ass walk up a ladd-“</p><p>“Unless you forgot, <em>I'm</em> not the one with a broken ankle,” Poppy hissed at him. “Now <em>get. down."</em></p><p>It had only been a few days since he’d had his last one, but <em>Christ</em> what he wouldn’t give for a cigarette. He’d certainly chosen a hell of a time to quit smoking.</p><p>Reluctantly, Tora made his way down the ladder, careful not to put any weight on the foot that was wrapped in a cast. Not that he gave a shit, but he knew if he didn’t, Poppy would have something <em>else</em> to say about it.</p><p>“Ain’t broken,” he mumbled as he landed on the floor and grabbed the crutches she was now holding out to him. “S’a hairline fracture.”</p><p>“Same difference,” Poppy shot back at him. Her large brown eyes that normally regarded him with such kindness were squinted in anger. “Officially broken or not, the doctor told you to keep weight off of it.”</p><p>Tora wedged the crutches under his arms; at six foot three, it had been difficult to find some that fit him properly and eventually they special ordered a pair. Though they were meant for taller adults, they still did very little to make him comfortable.</p><p>Seemed like he was uncomfortable in his own <em>skin</em> nowadays.</p><p>“Christ woman, I’m going fuckin’ <em>nuts</em> not being able to do anything around here,” he grumbled. “Can’t even walk the lil’ punk outside to take a piss.”</p><p>Poppy sighed as she turned her back on him and began to take down the metal ladder. Tora took a step toward her, itching to remove it from her hands and do it himself.</p><p>“Tora, I know it’s hard, but we’ve talked about this,” she told him. “If you listen to what the doctor says and just rest, you’ll heal more quickly.”</p><p>“If you keep pushing yourself, you’re going to make it worse and then surgery might be your only option.” Poppy looked over her shoulder at him. “I don’t want you to have to go through that, so just… let me take care of you, okay?”</p><p>
  <em>Take care of him.</em>
</p><p>Two weeks ago, Tora was reaching into the tallest cabinet in the bathroom to retrieve something for Poppy.</p><p>One week ago, he was giving her a piggyback ride on the beach after getting down on his left knee and asking her to marry him.</p><p>A few days later, he’d fractured the ankle of that same leg on a run through the park and couldn’t even walk up the stairs to take a piss without Poppy rushing to his side to help.</p><p>How the mighty had fallen.</p><p>“I’m going to take this out to the garage and then start dinner,” Poppy told him, tucking the ladder under her arm.</p><p>Tora took another step toward her. “I can-“</p><p>“Ooooh no, you sit,” she said, pointing over the kitchen island and into the living room. “Go make yourself comfortable on the couch. Is there anything you want or need before I start cooking?”</p><p>
  <em>My dignity. My full strength back. To not be a burden on you. To be able to take the boy on a stupid walk. To go back to work. To go to the gym. To be able to pick you up, carry you upstairs to our bedroom and have sex with me on top, so you’re not doing all the work in there, either.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>To make progress in therapy. For these withdrawal headaches to go away. To stop having night terrors.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>To be the kind of man you deserve, one that you know will make a good husband. A good father.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>To be better.</em>
</p><p>Tora sighed and shook his head as he turned his back on her. “Nah. I’m good.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <em>Tora was eight years old.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was in his bedroom at the Balthuman estate, if you could even call it that. “A place where he slept when Vincent wasn’t forcing him through training” was maybe a more accurate description.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Currently, Tora was backed into the corner, his cheek stinging hot and red from the slap Vincent had just delivered. The older, blonde man was hovering over him; Vincent had just ripped a toy Quincey had snuck into Tora’s room from his grasp and was now clutching it to his chest, along with the thin blanket and pillow from Tora’s cot.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Son, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this. Strong men do not play with fucking dinosaurs,” Vincent growled and held out Tora’s favorite electronic T-Rex in front of him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He let it drop to the hard wood floor and Tora watched in horror as Vincent’s fancy shoe came crashing down on top of it. He stomped and stomped and stomped until the toy was unrecognizable, just jagged scraps of plastic and metal on the ground.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Vincent turned his head then and called for Martin to enter the room. “Dispose of these,” Vincent hissed as he passed Tora’s bed dressings to the larger man, “and send him in.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Him” was one of the young boys the clan had rounded up off the street that month, a red-haired boy with freckles and eyes that sat too largely in his face.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Martin spun and left the room, only to return a moment later with the red-haired boy. He thrust the boy inside, stormed out and slammed the door shut behind him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Like a shark, Vincent circled Tora until he came to stand behind him. He placed his hands on his small shoulders and lowered his mouth to Tora’s ear.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Strong men do not try to escape. You remember that, right, Tora?” Vincent asked quietly.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora nodded slowly. After being whipped with a belt, thrown into a dog kennel and starved for two days, Tora hadn’t attempted to leave the estate since.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Good. Tate here hasn’t learned that lesson yet. Martin caught him trying to dig his way out under a fence this morning.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hearing his name, Tate looked up and into Tora’s eyes; they were wide and green and sad. Their gaze stayed connected for a moment longer and then Tate glanced down at the floor.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You’re a good boy, Tora. You know what’s expected of you. What do strong men do, son?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora inhaled deeply through his nose and exhaled slowly. He knew what was coming.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"They fight.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Vincent squeezed Tora’s shoulders. “And what do weak men do?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tate met Tora’s eyes again as Tora answered. “They die.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Show him,” Vincent murmured and removed his hands from Tora.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora stepped toward the boy.</em>
</p><p>Tora jolted upright in bed, his bare chest heaving and coated in sweat. He blinked several times until the image of Tate’s face melted away from his brain and was replaced with the sight of the bedroom he shared with Poppy.</p><p>His tiny fiancé rolled over to face him and as soon as she realized he was sitting upright, gasping for air, she wiggled out from under the covers and crawled into his lap. Poppy placed her small hands on either side of his face and he immediately covered them with his own.</p><p>“You okay?” she whispered, her eyes seeking his.</p><p>“Yeah,” he gasped and wound his arms around her, hugging her close, burying his face in her neck.</p><p>Poppy responded in kind and ran her fingers through his long, tangled hair.</p><p>“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked.</p><p>Tora inhaled the scent of her floral shampoo. Anything, <em>anything</em> to replace the metallic smell of blood that was overwhelming the inside of his nose. It was a memory, a dream, but it still stung and burned as much as the real thing.</p><p>“No,” he finally responded. “I’ll be okay.”</p><p>Tora didn’t sleep for the rest of the night.</p><p>---</p><p><strong>Session 5</strong>:<em>”Tora, the more you focus on the negative, the more negative you will see.”</em></p><p>
  <strong>One Week Later</strong>
</p><p>“Okay, I’m going to head upstairs for a couple of hours to edit this manuscript,” Poppy said as she tossed a light throw blanket over Tora on the couch. “Do you need anything before I go?”</p><p>
  <em>A goddamn motherfucking cigarette.</em>
</p><p>“No,” Tora grumbled. He shifted on the sofa and as he did, something clattered to the floor. He peered over the edge of the cushion. The remote.</p><p>He sighed and as he leaned down to grab it, a tiny hand darted out and snatched it up first.</p><p>“Here you go,” Poppy said and laid it on his lap.</p><p>“Christ, I coulda fuckin’ gotten it, Poppy,” Tora snapped. “My goddamn hands aren’t broken.”</p><p>
  <em>Please, just let me do one thing for myself. It’s one less thing that you have to do.</em>
</p><p>Poppy peered down at him for a moment, the slightest frown stretching across her normally cheerful face.</p><p>Fuck. Why couldn’t he just say what he meant? Since when was it so hard to let her know what he was feeling?</p><p>“Okay, looks like you have everything you need,” she said, seemingly choosing to ignore his comment. She gestured at the makeshift nest she’d prepared for him on the sofa: pillows, a blanket, a large glass of water, a couple of protein bars, the remote, crutches, his phone and charger. The laptop and its charger just within his reach.</p><p>An apology was on the tip of his tongue, but the dull pounding of his head caused it to vibrate and jump back into his throat.</p><p>Fucking withdrawals.</p><p>“I have a meeting with Michael Kondo at one o’clock,” she continued. “We’re having lunch at a little café downtown. It shouldn’t take more than a couple of hours and I’ll have my phone on if you need me. Don’t forget you have your appointment with Julia at one thirty.”</p><p>Poppy scooped Callum up from his current place on the recliner, as well as a couple of his toys. “I’ll take Callum with me so he doesn’t bother you.”</p><p>“Pop-“ Tora started, but she either didn’t hear him or chose to ignore him; she’d already turned her back and was halfway up the stairs.</p><p>His head lulled back onto the arm of the couch and he let out a deep sigh.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck.</em>
</p><p>In his life, he’d been stabbed, beaten, grazed by bullets and would gladly take <em>any</em> of those injuries over a stupid bone fracture.</p><p>At least he’d still been able to do things for himself; he’d been <em>forced</em> to learn how. There was no Poppy to nurse him back to health then and he honestly almost preferred it that way. At least there was no feeling the need to wait on him hand and foot. At least there was no spending most of her time worrying about a six foot three pain in the ass.</p><p>At least she was happy.</p><p>Tora tilted his head up as a cough wrenched out of his mouth and he squinted against the sudden increased aching in his brain. Fuck, he couldn’t wait for the symptoms to stop.</p><p>When he’d decided to quit smoking, it was all for Poppy. She’d never nagged at him to stop, but he knew how worried she was about cancer; her dad had died of it after all. His passing was what caused her granny to finally quit.  </p><p>If Tora could ease any worry for Poppy, he would. One day, he had tossed his last pack of cigarettes out and was determined not to look back.</p><p>What a fucking joke <em>that</em> turned out to be.</p><p>His stubborn ass quit cold turkey; he hadn’t invested in patches or gum. He was convinced he was strong enough to get over this dependency on nicotine without becoming reliant on something else.</p><p>Now here he was: not only holed up on the couch, unable to move freely on his own, but he was snapping at Poppy any time she did… well, anything. Here he’d been trying to relieve her of a burden and in doing so, only added to her existing stress.</p><p>Tora just couldn’t <em>help</em> himself; it seemed like everything pissed him off nowadays. Normally when he was feeling like this, he’d go for a run. When he’d done research online about nicotine withdrawals, one of the suggestions was to get outside and exercise.</p><p>He snorted as he sneered down at the cast on his left leg.</p><p>He’d tried eating better, deep breathing exercises, avoiding caffeine, but nothing seemed to help. He’d always had trouble sleeping thanks to his night terrors, but especially more so now that he’d had his last cigarette. He took small naps during the day but never felt any less tired.</p><p>Talking to his therapist Julia had helped some in the beginning; despite the increased frequency of his night terrors, he’d finally felt he was on the road to true healing. It was good to get out of the house, meet her in her office downtown, vent and get everything off his chest and then go back home to Poppy in a better mood, feeling lighter.</p><p>One of the last things Julia had told him was that he should do something for himself; pick up a hobby, something that made him happy.</p><p>She’d also told him how proud she was of him and the progress he was making. He had really come a long way, she said.</p><p>Then he’d broken his ankle and that ended the in-office visits.</p><p>Poppy worked from home full time and wasn’t always available to drive him to Julia’s office complex. He couldn’t drive himself and taking a cab to every appointment would become expensive, so Julia had introduced him to video call sessions on the computer.</p><p>He fucking <em>hated</em> it.</p><p>Not only was he usually on non-speaking terms with technology, but he couldn’t stand sitting on the couch, revisiting bad memories in the place he was supposed to be his most comfortable, not being able to read Julia’s body language, as the camera only showed her from the shoulders up.</p><p>He just felt so <em>disconnected.</em></p><p>More than once he’d been overwhelmed by the urge to click that little ‘x’ button and watch her image disappear from his screen, his home.</p><p>Christ, sometimes he wanted to so <em>badly</em> but Tora knew if he did that, Julia would become just one more woman in his life that he was disappointing.</p><p>---</p><p>Three hours later, Tora awoke from a nap on the couch. He grimaced as he sat up; the thundering in his head hadn’t ceased with sleep like he’d hoped it would and his right foot was numb and tingly from being tucked beneath his cast.</p><p>And he really, <em>really</em> had to piss.</p><p>For a brief moment, Tora had the passing thought of asking Poppy to help him up the stairs; it probably wasn’t the best idea to try it by himself with a numb right leg and a broken left leg. But he knew she needed to finish editing that manuscript before her meeting with Kondo; Lord knew what he’d have to say if she didn’t. Poppy had only been working with the guy for a month, but he was turning out to be a real prick.</p><p>And the last thing she needed was another man in her life snapping at her.</p><p>Tora wouldn’t bother her.</p><p>He could do this by himself.</p><p>Tora swiveled on the couch cushion and propped his feet on the floor. One hand on the armrest, his weight balanced on the cast, he hoisted himself up and was able to stand without much trouble. He shot a quick glance at the crutches leaning on the arm of the sofa and decided against using them.</p><p>He’d managed to stand all on his own; he could walk on his own, too.</p><p>Tora hobbled across the room, his right foot shrieking pins and needles at him every time he took a step. Fuck it; it wasn’t like it was broken. He just couldn’t… <em>feel</em> it. He paused at the base of the staircase, gripped the railing in his right hand and began his ascent up the wooden steps.</p><p>He was five stairs in when his prickly, sock-clad right foot slipped out from under him. He gripped at the railing and managed to right himself, but not before whacking his fractured ankle off the next step.</p><p><em>"Fuck!"</em> he shouted, his foot aching and his headache thrumming around his eyes.</p><p>Why was this so fucking hard?</p><p>In a handful of seconds, the bedroom door wrenched open and Poppy was darting down the hall toward him. “Tora, oh my god! Are you okay?” she asked, leaning down to inspect his ankle. “Why didn’t you holler for me or send me a text? I could’ve helped you-“</p><p>“Didn’t wanna bother you,” Tora grumbled and reluctantly took the hand she was extending to him.</p><p>Poppy heaved a large sigh. “How many times do I have to tell you you’re <em>not?"</em></p><p>Tora said nothing as he lumbered up the stairs, one hand in Poppy’s and her arm wrapped securely around his waist.</p><p>When they reached the bathroom door, Poppy gripped a handful of his shirt in her fist. “Tora,” she said quietly, stopping him. He turned and looked down at her. “Will you please just tell me what’s going on with you?”</p><p>
  <em>No. Because you won’t want to hear it. It will destroy you like it’s destroyed me and I’ve already caused you enough hurt for a lifetime. You deserve a man who comes home to you in good spirits, who talks to you with nothing but love. There are days I don’t even want to talk to Julia about it, but I do because she doesn’t matter.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She’s safe.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Maybe I should never have proposed to you. Maybe now that you have a ring on your finger, you feel like you have to stay.</em>
</p><p>“This,” Tora said at last, gesturing down at the cast wrapped around his left ankle. “This is what’s goin’ on with me.”</p><p>“But-“</p><p>“Just… enough, Poppy. I’ll be out in a minute,” he told her and shut the door.</p><p>---</p><p>“Tora?”</p><p>Poppy’s soft voice drifted pleasantly over him as he roused from another nap. Her fingers moved gently through his hair and across his cheek.</p><p>She really was the best thing in the world to wake up to.</p><p>“Mmm?”</p><p>“It’s 12:30 and I’m getting ready to leave for my meeting. Is there anything you need before I head out?”</p><p>Tora cracked one eye open to look up at her. “Nah, I’m okay. Have a good meetin’.”</p><p>“Okay. I took Cal potty and he’s sleeping in the living room kennel right now, so he should be fine while I’m gone. I shouldn’t be more than an hour, two tops. You know I wouldn’t be leaving you here alone if Mr. Kondo didn’t <em>insist</em> on meeting in person, right?”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>“Call me if you need anything, okay?”</p><p>“’Kay.”</p><p>She sighed. “Okay. Bye.”</p><p>Poppy turned away from him; he watched her disappear into the kitchen and then a moment later, he heard the front door close behind her.</p><p>A handful of minutes passed and after Tora had fully woken, he sat up in a panic. She didn’t ask for a kiss before she left and he never offered to give her one. That had <em>never</em> happened before.</p><p><em>Beginning of the end,</em> a long dormant voice whispered from some deep, dark corner of his mind.</p><p>No. No. She was coming back. She was just stressed about her meeting; she was going to <em>return</em> from that meeting and she was going to stay.</p><p>Right?</p><p>A dry cough pushed upward from his chest and blew past his mouth; he hacked hard and winced again as his brain thrummed hard inside his skull. He took a healthy drink of water from the glass Poppy set aside for him and ripped open one of the protein bars.</p><p>He chewed on it half-heartedly; his body was telling him he was starving, but he didn’t really have an appetite. It was a strange limbo to be in, craving sustenance but not caring enough to sate it.</p><p>Once he finished his snack, Tora flopped back onto the couch and played a game on his phone until it was time to log onto his video session with Julia. Fuck, he wasn’t ready for this; he already knew what she was going to ask him.</p><p>
  <em>”Tora, what’s one thing you’ve done for yourself in the past week? One thing that made you happy?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Nothing. I was too busy feeling sorry for myself, fighting off every urge to smoke and lashing out at my fiancé who’s been nothing but a goddamned angel to me.”</em>
</p><p>He wouldn’t exactly have the right answer for Julia, but they would definitely have a shit ton to talk about.</p><p>Tora heaved the laptop across his legs and stabbed at the power button.</p><p>Nothing.</p><p>His eyebrows furrowed.</p><p>The hell?</p><p>He checked that the charger was secure in the back of the machine and his gaze then followed the power cord to the outlet.</p><p>Goddamn it, he’d forgotten to plug it in.</p><p>Tora sighed as he angled his body over the armrest and plugged it into the wall. He powered on the laptop and shot a glance at the clock. 1:25. So he might be a little late.</p><p>A couple of minutes later, Tora was opening an internet browser and selecting the bookmarked link for the counseling website. Immediately an error message was displayed across the screen.</p><p>
  <em>NOT CONNECTED TO THE INTERNET</em>
</p><p>What the fuck?</p><p>Tora scooped up his phone; it wasn’t connected either. He’d just paid the fucking wireless bill two days ago and it was on time. He didn’t know anything about this hacker shit and he wasn’t about to call their internet provider; their customer service sucked and he’d be on the phone with them for so long, he’d miss his therapy session anyway.</p><p>He could try calling Gyu, but now that he was working midnight shifts, he was probably still sleeping. He wasn’t going to bother him. Tora peeked at the time on his laptop: 1:32.</p><p>Tora sighed as he recalled Gyu always telling him to try turning off the machine and then back on before anything else, so he did.</p><p>He pulled up the counseling link and received the same error message.</p><p>1:35.</p><p>
  <em>What do strong men do, son?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>They fight.</em>
</p><p>He was tired of fighting.</p><p>In a fit of exhaustion, frustration and rage, Tora threw his laptop and phone onto the ground and heaved himself off the couch. He shoved his crutches under his arms and moved unsteadily into the kitchen. He slipped on a white sneaker and stuffed his wallet in his pocket.</p><p>
  <em>And what do weak men do?</em>
</p><p>He grabbed his house key off the samurai sword holder and angled his way out the front door.</p><p>
  <em>They give in. They escape and leave the house for the one thing they shouldn’t.</em>
</p><p>Crutches gripped tightly under both arms, Tora hobbled three blocks to the nearest gas station, Julia’s words ringing in his ears with every jarring step.</p><p>
  <em>If you’re experiencing feelings of annoyance or anger, try using your words to express them, Tora. Not your body.</em>
</p><p>Oh, he’d use his words, all right. Three words that had been smoldering like dying embers in the back of his mind for days.</p><p>Tora pulled the door of the gas station open and hefted himself up to the counter. The clerk eyed him for a moment and then spoke.</p><p>“How can I help you?”</p><p>Tora pointed behind the middle-aged man.</p><p>“Pack of Marlboros.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <em>Good.</em>
</p><p>Tora felt good.</p><p>At least, physically better than he had the last week or so, anyway.</p><p>He pulled deeply on the cigarette and released the smoke in one steady stream. His heart was racing, his fucking ears were tingling and he felt… <em>happy.</em> More than likely a false sense of happiness, it was just the nicotine doing its thing to his brain, but it was still a welcome feeling.</p><p>Poppy was going to be pissed.</p><p>She’d been so damn proud of him when he told her he wanted to stop smoking; she didn’t want to be the catalyst for it, had never told him to quit, so she’d been thrilled when he came to the decision on his own.</p><p>Then again, maybe Poppy would surprise him and she <em>wouldn't</em> be angry. Maybe she’d support him in this because inevitably it would make him less irritable and more bearable to be around.</p><p>Tora sucked in another fiery breath; the smoke burned his airways and he let out a cough. His head still hurt but the aching dulled with every inhale.</p><p>He peered out over the railing of the balcony as he tugged at his Marlboro, watching the tops of commercial buildings fade in the haze of smoke. His eyes traced the streets below: a young couple holding hands, heading in the direction of the park. A man walking his Labrador down the opposite side of the street. A young mom, pushing her toddler in a stroller.</p><p>His gaze shifted to the other buildings in their apartment complex. The old neighbor lady’s cat stretched out on their own balcony, cleaning itself in the sun. The small, flourishing herb garden the young family on the bottom floor had put out in the spring. A large stack of old pallets with a sign that read <em>Free</em> on the curb in front of Larry’s unit.</p><p>Inhale. Exhale.</p><p>Suddenly, from behind him, the sound of the patio door being shoved open and then the indignant voice of his fiancé.</p><p>“Are you fucking <em>kidding</em> me?” Poppy spat.</p><p>Tora turned his head and looked at her, saying nothing.</p><p>She stomped around him until she was standing between him and the railing. He backed up to give her space and felt himself brush against the side of the building.</p><p>Inhale. Exhale.</p><p>He pushed the smoke away from the direction of her face.</p><p>“Do you have <em>any</em> idea what I’ve just been through?” she asked and wiped at her eyes with the sleeve of her cardigan.</p><p>“What are ya talkin’ about?” he asked and reached a hand out to her. To do what, he didn’t know.</p><p>Poppy shoved his hand away from her. “I’m talking about you skipping your therapy appointment, not telling <em>anyone</em> and then not answering your phone!” she cried.</p><p>“Julia called me after you didn’t log in to your session. She said she tried calling you, but it kept going to voicemail. I’m your emergency contact, so she reached out to me. Then I couldn’t get a hold of you either, I left you here alone and…”</p><p>Poppy glared up at him, her eyes dark with anger. “She was worried about you. <em>I</em> was worried about you. How could you do that? After everything we’ve been through, with… with <em>him</em> and…”</p><p>Tora frowned. He didn’t have to ask who <em>he</em> was.</p><p>“Here I am, running through the front door expecting to find you unconscious or worse,” Poppy yelled. “Instead, I find our laptop busted on the living room floor, your cell phone and you out here <em>smoking on the balcony.”</em></p><p>The tone in her voice, the way she had planted herself in front of him and then backed him into a corner, screaming at him for doing something he enjoyed… it was all too familiar.</p><p>He’d been here before.</p><p>
  <em>Son, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this.</em>
</p><p>In a flash, Poppy’s hand shot out and yanked the pack of Marlboros from his front pants pocket, followed by the lighter. “What are you doing?” she cried. “We’re supposed to be moving forward. Why won’t you talk to me? Why do you have to be so stubborn?!”</p><p>With a loud sob, she threw the pack of cigarettes down onto the wooden floor of the balcony.</p><p>
  <em>Strong men do not play with fucking dinosaurs.</em>
</p><p>Tora’s jaw clenched.</p><p><em>Poppy,</em> he told himself.</p><p>This was Poppy. Not Vincent.</p><p>But the anger was the same and once the words had formed in his aching brain, he was powerless to stop them.</p><p>“Why do ya have to be such a <em>fuckin’ bitch?” </em>he growled.</p><p>Poppy’s mouth dropped open, then settled into a straight line and she took a step back, away from him.</p><p>Regret.</p><p>He’d never felt so much regret in his entire life.</p><p>“Pop-“ he started.</p><p>She cut him off by raising a hand in the air. “Don’t, Tora. Just don’t.”</p><p>She set the lighter down on the bannister. “I’m going to get dinner started,” she said and moved past him into the apartment.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck.</em>
</p><p>Fuck, fuck FUCK.</p><p>She was <em>worried</em> about him and he called her a fucking <em>bitch.</em></p><p>What the hell was wrong with him?</p><p>Tora’s hands balled into fists as he propped himself up against the railing. He didn’t mean a fucking word he said and even more than that, he was an <em>asshole. </em>Christ, she deserved so much better than him.</p><p>Tora yanked the half-finished cigarette from his mouth and threw it to the ground beside the discarded pack. He stomped it out with his shoe and then stooped awkwardly to pick it up. He stuffed it inside the pack and stood, collecting the lighter as he did.</p><p>Tucking his crutches under his arms, he moved inside and slid the patio door shut behind him. Distantly he could hear the clanking of metal pots being moved around and the sound of cabinet doors opening and closing.</p><p>When he reached the kitchen, Poppy was hovering over the stove, lighting a rear burner under a large pot of water. She didn’t look at him and he didn’t say a word as he tossed his last pack of cigarettes into the trash.</p><p>---</p><p>For the next half hour, Tora quietly lounged on the couch and stared at the tv as some episode of <em>Schitt’s Creek</em> played; it was one that made Poppy laugh ridiculously hard every time she saw it.</p><p>How the <em>fuck</em> did he even begin to make this right? He’d already sent Julia a text, apologizing for missing their session. She’d responded that she was simply glad to hear he was okay and she had an opening on Friday afternoon if he’d like to reschedule. He accepted.</p><p>It was going to take more than a few lines of text to make up for what he’d put Poppy through. He wanted to wrap her in his arms and promise it would never happen again. He wanted to tell her how sorry he was.   </p><p>He wanted to tell her… <em>everything.</em></p><p>The smell of Italian seasoned beef and warm marinara sauce drifted into the living room and his heart twisted pleasantly inside his chest. <em>S</em><em>he’d made his favorite dinner.</em> Maybe, if he apologized, she would forgive him.</p><p>“Tora?”</p><p>He looked over at where Poppy stood, straddling the line between the tiled kitchen floor and the living room carpet.</p><p>“Dinner’s ready,” she said.</p><p>---</p><p>With the exception of forks clinking off their plates and the sound of their water glasses being set down on the table top every so often, dinner was quiet. Tora knew what he wanted to say, but when was the right time? When would she be ready to hear it?</p><p>After they finished their meal, Poppy cleared the dishes from the dining table and began running water in the sink. Tora sat quietly for a moment, waiting for her to say something, <em>anything.</em> When she didn’t, he sighed internally and pushed himself out of his chair.</p><p>Using the countertops for balance, he limped up to the sink and stood beside her.</p><p>“Bobby.”</p><p>Poppy looked up at him, her hands pausing over the water.</p><p>“Can I wash the dishes?”</p><p>“No,” she said after a moment and pointed at one of the island barstools behind her. “But you can dry them.”</p><p>Tora smiled and rounded the island. He scooted the stool up to the sink and as he sat down, she handed him a white dishcloth.</p><p>For the next several minutes, she scrubbed pots and plates in soapy water, rinsed them and then passed them off to Tora, who wiped them clean of every drop.</p><p>Inhale.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he said and his chest caved in relief at the words. Poppy turned away from the sink and faced him.</p><p>Exhale.</p><p>Inhale.</p><p>“I’m <em>so fucking sorry.</em> I never meant- I was just so… Fuck, if I ever heard someone talk to ya the way I did, I’d beat the ever living shit outta them. I’d rather break my other goddamn foot than ever be the reason for that look on your face again.”</p><p>She regarded him carefully and then slowly, a tiny smile bloomed across her face. “Well, don’t do that,” she said.</p><p>Exhale.</p><p>At this crack in her resolve, Tora set the dishcloth on the counter and pivoted his body toward her. “Can I hug ya?”</p><p>Poppy nodded and the next thing he knew, she was in his arms.</p><p>Christ, never in a million years did he think that all he needed in this life could fit inside a tiny, five foot nothing woman. She was so small and yet, she was so <em>much.</em></p><p>“I didn’t mean it,” Tora murmured as he buried his face in her hair. “Yer not a bitch. Furthest thing from it. You’re my fuckin’ hero, ya know that?”</p><p>Poppy said nothing but he felt her arms tighten around him.</p><p>In that moment, the dam inside Tora broke.</p><p>“I’ve told ya before that you’re so much stronger’n me,” he said. “Braver, too. I meant it. I’ve been such a pain in the fucking ass the past few weeks and ya just take it all in stride.”</p><p>“Never once did ya complain or tell me off. And here I am, not even able to tell ya what’s really goin’ on inside my head. I’m too fuckin’… <em>ashamed,</em> I guess. You deserve so much better than me, Poppy.”</p><p>
  <em>Ashamed.</em>
</p><p>That was the word.</p><p>Ashamed of the things he’d done. Ashamed to touch her with the hands that had seen so much blood. Ashamed to tell her <em>any</em> of it because of the inevitable day she would wake up and realize she deserved normal, that she could leave.</p><p>And she would.</p><p>Poppy pulled her head away from him then and her large, brown eyes locked onto his. “Saying something out loud doesn’t just make it true, Tora. It makes it something <em>real</em> that we can tackle together.”</p><p>She brushed a strand of hair away from his face. “I can’t help if I don’t know what’s going on inside your head. And I <em>want</em> to know. When you asked me to marry you, I knew what I was saying yes to. Yes to all of you, no matter what. Even those parts that are hard to share. I know you’ve been having a rough time lately, but you’re it for me and you can tell me <em>anything,</em> okay?”</p><p>He nodded.</p><p><em>How?</em> How was this perfect woman his?</p><p>She wanted to know everything about him, about the thoughts going on in his head. And more than that, she deserved to know. Deserved an explanation.</p><p>He’d spent too much of his own life in the dark. It was the last place Poppy belonged.</p><p>For a moment, he didn’t say anything and Poppy eventually returned her attention to the dishes. Finally, Tora cleared his throat.</p><p>“When ya were yellin’ at me on the balcony,” he began, “it reminded me of a… dream I had. Well, maybe not a dream so much as a memory. Of Vincent. And somethin’ he made me do.”</p><p>Poppy paused and turned her head to look at him.</p><p>“He… uh- well, I was eight years old and…” he trailed off, losing the words, his nerve.</p><p>Fuck. Why was this so hard? It wasn’t his fault. He didn’t have a choice, but it didn’t make telling Poppy any less difficult.</p><p>“Tora?”</p><p>He lifted his gaze to hers.</p><p>“Would it be easier if I wasn’t looking at you?”</p><p>
  <em>Yes.</em>
</p><p>“Um, yeah. If that’s okay,” he said.</p><p>She offered him a small smile and locked her eyes onto the dishes in front of her.</p><p>Inhale.</p><p>Exhale.</p><p>“I was eight years old and in my bedroom. Well, wasn’t really so much a bedroom as it was a place I stayed when I wasn’t trainin’. Had a cot and that was it. Anyway, Quincey snuck in this T-Rex toy, he knew it was my favorite and…”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <em>”Tora?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>At the sound of his fiance’s voice, he was roused awake. He immediately shoved himself out of bed, desperate to seek her out.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Would you please come here for a second?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora crossed the hall and gently rapped on the bathroom door. “Okay to come in?” he asked.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Uh huh.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>As he stepped into the room, he was met with the sight of Poppy fully dressed and pointing up at the top cabinet in the wall.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Badump. Badump. Badump.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>What was that sound? Did she hear it, too?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Can you reach that for me?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Sure, shorty,” he chuckled. He stopped in front of the cabinet and as he opened it, he heard the gentle thumping sound again. Louder this time.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>BADUMP. BADUMP. BADUMP.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora looked down at Poppy. “What’s in here, Bobby?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”My heart,” she replied. “Can you reach it?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Her heart? But… she’d given it to him. Why did she want it back?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>As much as it would break his own, he would get it for her.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Anything for her.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora shoved his hand into the cabinet, up to his elbow, his shoulder. The thumping was so loud, it had to be right there, but he couldn’t reach it.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Where was it?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Suddenly, the darkened cabinet went quiet. Her heart had stopped.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora’s eyes widened. “Poppy…” he said and spun around.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She was gone.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Poppy?” he called out, but there was no answer.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Poppylan!”</em>
</p><p>Tora awoke with a gasp, his hands clenched around the sheets in tight fists. He snapped his head to the left, where Poppy’s head was cradled on the pillow next to him, her long hair billowing around her.</p><p>At the sight of her, Tora gulped down a few deep breaths and turned onto his side to face her. He wound one arm around her waist and she stirred beneath his touch.</p><p>“Mmm, Tora?” she mumbled. “You okay?”</p><p>“Y-yeah,” he said and slid his hand beneath the hem of her night shirt. It ventured north and settled in the warm valley between her breasts, where he could feel the soft, firm beating of her heart.</p><p>
  <em>Badump. Badump. Badump.</em>
</p><p>Poppy slipped her hand over his, over her shirt. “Are you sure you’re okay?” she asked, her words clearer this time.</p><p>“Had a bad dream,” he said, trying to sync his breaths with the rhythmic thumping inside her chest.</p><p>“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked as she rubbed her hand along his arm.</p><p>Tora swallowed hard. “You… ya asked me to get your heart out of the top cabinet. You wanted to take it with ya when you left.”</p><p>“I’m right here, Tora,” Poppy told him firmly and gripped his arm tightly in her tiny hand. “I’m not going anywhere. I love you.”</p><p>“I know. I love you too.”</p><p>He settled his head back down on the pillow and after a string of quiet moments, he was asleep, his hand still pressed firmly against her heart.</p><p>---</p><p><strong>Session 9</strong>: <em>"The one thing that can never be taken from you is hope. And as long as you have hope, Tora, things will get better."</em></p><p>
  <em>---</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Good.</em>
</p><p>Tora felt good.</p><p>Better than he’d felt in weeks.</p><p>He pushed his hair off his sweaty forehead. It was the warmest day June had seen so far and his whole body was drenched. He could feel the edges of the nicotine patch peeling away from his skin; he’d have to replace it later.</p><p>Tora collected another screw from his toolbox, lined it up with the mark he’d made on the end of the wooden box and drilled it in.</p><p>Done.</p><p>Tora carefully turned the planter box over in his hands; it was small, barely three feet wide and the perfect size for their balcony. He’d made it completely from scratch and thought Poppy might like it to grow her strawberry plants in this year.</p><p>He ran his large hands over every board face and satisfied that there were no rough edges, he set the box on the balcony floor and whipped out his phone from his pocket. Tora snapped a picture of it, opened a text conversation, selected <em>Julia </em>as the contact and pressed <em>send.</em></p><p>She replied almost instantly.</p><p>
  <em>Tora, it’s beautiful! You’ve accomplished so much and I couldn’t be prouder of you. Poppy will love it!</em>
</p><p>He smirked and tucked his phone away.</p><p>Tora thought back to the last session he’d had with Julia; she’d asked him again what he had done for himself, something that made him happy. Apparently "<em>decided to give nicotine patches a try” </em>and<em> “bought a new video game”</em> weren’t the answers she was looking for.</p><p>Julia urged him to find something creative to fill his time, to help him figure out who he truly was. He’d had so much taken from him and he had the freedom now to do literally anything.</p><p>
  <em>”Creating something of your own can help to heal you, it can build your confidence and give you hope. The one thing that can never be taken from you is hope. And as long as you have hope, Tora, things will get better.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"The question is: what does hope look like for you? I know you’ve said you play the guitar. Is it a song you’ve practiced? Taking care of your houseplants? Cooking? Drawing?”</em>
</p><p>Hope.</p><p>
  <em>Hope had a pulse. It had curves, a five-foot nothing frame. It had big brown eyes and the prettiest smile he’d ever seen. It had a sweet voice, one that laughed, that teased, cried and moaned his name.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hope had warmth, talent, drive. Hope had tiny hands that reached for him, that touched him gently and held him close.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hope had a name.</em>
</p><p>For him, hope was Poppy and the life they’d built together, but he doubted that was what Julia had in mind.</p><p> After that session, Tora logged off the computer and limped out to the balcony.</p><p> Inhale.</p><p> Exhale.</p><p> It was the last place he’d smoked and though he hadn’t touched a cigarette in days, the memory of the comfort the bad habit provided was still there. He could <em>breathe</em> out here.</p><p> Tora knew what hope looked like for him and Poppy.</p><p> But what did it look like for <em>himself?</em></p><p>The moment he’d asked himself that question was the moment his eyes once again settled on the curb in front of Larry’s ground floor apartment; the pile of wooden pallets was still there, stacked under a large sign that read <em>Free.</em></p><p> <em>Free.</em></p><p> He had the freedom to do literally anything.  </p><p>
  <em>Creating something of your own can help to heal you, it can build your confidence and give you hope.</em>
</p><p>Build.</p><p>That day, Tora went downstairs, knocked on Larry’s door and asked if he’d be willing to help him lug the pallets into his and Poppy’s garage. The older man agreed and afterwards, Tora was left with a pile of splintered wood and no power tools.</p><p>While Poppy attended a meeting in the city, he’d hopped into a cab and ventured out to the nearest hardware store. After hobbling around the shop seemingly in circles, unsure of what he was looking for, he was approached by an attendant who helped him select the tools he would need for his project.</p><p>Tora watched every video that Gyu linked to him, read up on the basics of woodworking, smashed his fingers he didn’t know how many fucking times, plucked splinters from the palms of his hands and finally, he’d <em>made</em> something.</p><p>His hands, once weapons and something to be feared, were capable of <em>more.</em></p><p>Tora wiped the sweat off his forehead with the hem of his shirt and clicked the drill off. A part of him wanted to go inside and call out for Poppy so he could give her the planter box. He couldn’t wait to see her face.</p><p>But another part of him, long dormant or maybe entirely new, urged him to head inside quietly, sit down on the couch and bask in what he’d just done, allow himself to keep it for a little longer.</p><p>So he did.</p><p>Tora propped himself up on the sofa and swung the foot wrapped in the walking boot up on the cushions. He plucked the remote from the end table, pointed it at the tv and thinking better of it, dropped it on the carpet.</p><p>“Bobby?”</p><p>“Yeah?” she called from the bedroom.</p><p>“Can ya c’mere for a second?”</p><p>She appeared in front of him moments later in a yellow sundress, her hair tied in two braids. “What’s up?”</p><p>Tora gestured toward the remote on the floor. “Will ya grab that for me? Can’t reach it,” he smirked.</p><p>Poppy’s eyebrows rose as she let out a disbelieving laugh. “Seriously?”</p><p>Tora nodded quickly. “Uh huh.”</p><p>“You’re so weird. And a little lazy,” she said and as she bent over in front of him, he gave her ass a healthy squeeze.</p><p>Poppy yelped in surprise and when she turned around to swat at his hand, he grabbed her and pulled her down on top of him.</p><p>She shifted until she was straddling his hips. As she pressed against him, her nose slowly scrunched up. “Ew, Tora, you’re all sweaty!”</p><p>“Been outside workin’,” he murmured as he trailed his mouth along her jaw.</p><p>At this, Poppy perked up. “Oh? Working? On what?”</p><p>“I’ll show ya in a bit,” he promised. “But yer right, I’m sweaty and I probably stink. Could really use a sponge bath.”</p><p>Poppy giggled and rolled her eyes at him. “Your hands aren’t broken, mister. You don’t need a sponge bath.”</p><p>“Kay, fine. Don’t need one. But I <em>want</em> one.”</p><p>His lips brushed against hers softly at first, then more firmly. Poppy’s hands threaded through his hair and pulled on it slightly. He groaned and ground his hips up into her.</p><p>When she pulled away, she was panting a little.</p><p>“Okay,” she breathed. “You talked me into it.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <em>Tora was in his bedroom at the Balthuman estate, if you could even call it that. He was standing in the center of the room and he was… taller this time. Not a kid, but an adult.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>A man.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora watched as Vincent threw his favorite T-Rex to the floor and stomped it into little, jagged pieces. Martin entered a moment later and escorted Tate inside.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”Strong men do not try to escape. You remember that, right, Tora?” Vincent asked quietly.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora didn’t respond.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>”What do strong men do, son?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"They fight,” Tora replied and advanced on Vincent until he was backed into the corner.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"And... what do weak men do?” Vincent whispered, his eyes wide.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"They end up like you,” Tora said and turned his back on him. He stooped to the floor and collected the remains of the broken toy; somehow his hands managed to pick up every piece, even the smallest ones. And somehow, he was able to put it back together.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tora stood and Tate stared up at him, his green eyes round and curious. Tora handed him the toy and gestured to the open door; Tate shuffled across the floor, clutching the dinosaur to his chest.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Once the boy had cleared the windowless room, Tora stepped out into the hallway and closed the door behind him.</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I am by no means a therapist, but I've gone through extensive counseling in my life for various things. The "session" quotes were found online; these are things that have been said to people by their real-life therapists (the submissions were anonymous, otherwise I would credit them here!) The three I chose to include resonated with me personally and I felt they would for Tora too, while he navigated this rough patch of his life.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Wedding Day - Part One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora get married. </p><p>Told from Poppy and Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Eeeeek, we're finally here! I've been dying to write this day for the longest time. I have several of you to thank for requesting Tora and Poppy's wedding day:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, TifaEsque, Audrey, RaquelSousa, juliabsquared,<br/>Spotlightgirlontherun, Rollie89 and Mackgurl2020. </p><p>A special thank you and shout out goes to BegoniaRex and my best friend Gaby for beta reading, and being so incredibly supportive. To OneandOnlyTako and JaxStarGazer: thank you for being such encouraging, avid readers and the sweetest souls! </p><p>You'll see all four of these ladies pop up in this two-shot :) </p><p>I hope you all enjoy the first part of Tora and Poppy's big day! Thank you so much for still being here. Merry Christmas (to those who celebrate) and happy holidays!</p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p><p>P.S. So as it turns out, I am one of THOSE people and created a mood board for the wedding LOL. I'm a visual person myself and thought you guys might like to see the inspiration behind everyone's looks, the decor, etc. You can find it at the end of this chapter :) </p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I am yours<br/>
Now and always<br/>
Wouldn't dream to be anything more<br/>
You take my breath away every night<br/>
Still can't believe it when you say you’re mine and<br/>
I am yours, I am yours, I am yours”</p><p>-Andy Grammer, “I Am Yours”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Stupid, shitty, goddamn pin from motherfuckin’ <em>hell</em>,” Tora cursed under his breath as he stabbed himself in the finger for the third time. He understood he was supposed to wear the tiger lily boutonniere on his lapel; it was a wedding, after all. <em>His </em>wedding. Poppy had spent several months planning this day for them, putting up with Quincey, picking out these exact flowers.</p><p>All Tora had to do was put them on.</p><p>And he would but… did the pin have to be so fucking <em>small</em>?</p><p>And did his hands have to shake so <em>much</em>?</p><p>After a couple minutes of wrestling with the pin and more than a couple of curse words later, Tora managed to awkwardly fasten the boutonniere to the folded fabric of his navy blue suit jacket. He tugged at the bottom hem of the coat and straightened it against his chest. After a moment’s pause, he sucked in a breath and looked at himself in the hotel mirror.</p><p>His hair was pulled back in its usual half bun, secured with Poppy’s strawberry hair tie. Two weeks ago, he’d wondered what to do with his long, black mop. Would Poppy want him to get it cut before the big day? Have it styled a certain way? When he finally approached her about it, she smiled and told him to wear it however made him comfortable.</p><p>“When we look back at our pictures ten years from now, I want us to look like <em>us</em>,” she said. It was her whole reason for not going on a drastic diet or getting a spray tan, like she said she’d seen so many other women do.</p><p>Even today, the biggest, most important day of their lives, she wanted him just the way he was.</p><p>Tora exhaled deeply as he did up another button on his white shirt and then arranged his hair so it fell like a curtain over the tattoo on his neck. Now that wedding planning was over and they were finally able to start putting money back again, he was going to get the damn thing lasered off.</p><p>He stared at himself in the mirror for awhile longer, unable to believe that the man looking back at him would be married in an hour. Of all the twists and turns his life had taken, no other had been so unexpected or welcomed as Poppylan.</p><p>Tora never thought he’d be in a committed relationship, let alone live to see 30. Now here he was, in a hotel room on the beach, reaching for a tie on his wedding day, all because of a tiny five foot nothing woman.</p><p>With twitching hands, Tora looped the pink tie around his neck. At this moment, he was thankful he’d opted out of being photographed while getting ready. The last thing he needed was another pair of eyes on him while he was trying to figure this shit out. Then again, maybe he could’ve used the help.</p><p>He could <em>not </em>tie the fucking thing.</p><p>Tora yanked the long piece of fabric away from his neck and started again. Fuck, when was the last time he’d even worn a tie? During the trials? For a clan meeting? He’d chosen to never wear one if he could help it; they were too restricting, too formal, which was exactly why Vincent liked them. As if the brand on their necks wasn’t enough, he added insult to injury by making Balthuman men wear dog collars made of imported silk.</p><p>Tora’s hands trembled violently.</p><p><em>Fuck. </em>It was uneven, the knot was lopsided.</p><p>He ripped the tie away from his collar and heaved a deep breath as Poppy’s words echoed in his ears.</p><p><em>"</em> <em>Wear it however you’re comfortable. When we look back at our pictures ten years from now, I want us to look like us.”</em></p><p>Fuck it, he’d go without.</p><p>Tora chucked the tie across the room and moved to sit on the bed, where he slipped on his cognac-colored dress shoes. He fiddled with the set of tiny, red metal poppy cufflinks at his wrists; they’d been a gift from Quincey the night before. He adjusted them until they felt secure and then stood once more.</p><p>He was ready, as ready as he’d ever be.</p><p>Tora pulled out his phone and smirked as he skimmed through the messages in his group chat with Quincey and Gyu: plans for a bachelor party that were abruptly cancelled after Tora threatened to beat their asses and one this morning from Quincey, rubbing it in Gyu’s face that “he was the wedding planner, officiant <em>and </em>the best man. That makes me a triple threat, honey.” Gyu, of course, gave zero shits.</p><p>He scrolled past the group chat and opened his conversation thread with Poppy. The last one she’d sent him had been hours ago, after the wedding rehearsal, when they’d finally parted ways for the night. He’d been unconscious in bed when he received it and then been too distracted and worked up to remember to respond to her when he woke up.</p><p>
  <em>Good night, handsome. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow. I love you.</em>
</p><p>Tora smiled and tapped open a new message.</p><p>
  <em>I lov- </em>
</p><p>Before he finished typing, there was a knock at the door.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Poppy</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Ow, Dene, ow! You’re pulling again!” Poppy shrieked as Erdene lifted the curling iron and then released a newly formed brunette curl.</p><p>The wedding photographer Claudia, a tall, thin woman with long, black dreadlocks piled on top of her head, circled them; the only sounds coming from her were quiet chuckles and the shuttering of her large camera.</p><p>“Poppy, quit talking,” Danae said, pointing a lip liner applicator at Poppy’s mouth. “You’re going to end up looking like the Joker if you don’t stop moving.”</p><p>“Damn, Pops, how are you this tender headed?” Erdene piped up. “I’m barely touching you! Do you act like this when Tiger pulls yo-“</p><p>“Erdene, do <em>not</em> finish that sentence,” Poppy said, glaring up at her best friend in the mirror.</p><p>“<em>Poppylan</em>, what did I just say?” Danae barked, flicking her on the nose with the lip liner pen.</p><p>“Hey! <em>She s</em>tarted it!” Poppy cried, pointing up at the purple haired woman.</p><p>Erdene stuck out her tongue at Poppy in the mirror and then glanced over to the right. “Belle, you’ve been staring out that window for the past ten minutes. What’s so damn interesting?”</p><p>“Nothing,” Mirabelle mumbled quickly as she moved away from the window and into the bathroom.  </p><p>“She’s looking for Gyuuuu,” Danae chirped as she traced a line around Poppy’s lips. “They’re still talking.”</p><p>Erdene’s eyebrows raised as she captured Poppy’s hair in the curling iron. “What? Really? Since when? And why didn’t I know about this?”</p><p>“Off and on since last Christmas,” Danae informed her, capping the liner pen and setting it to the side. She plucked up a tube of matte rose pink lipstick and began applying it to Poppy’s bottom lip. “She really likes him. They hung out for a bit last night before we came back to the hotel.”</p><p>“I knew she did,” Poppy said when Danae pulled the lipstick away from her mouth. “Why do you think I have her walking down the aisle with him?”</p><p>Erdene let out a laugh as she pulled a lock of hair away from Poppy’s face and began to braid it. “You little minx! I love it.”</p><p>Her friends continued to chatter around her and after a moment, they joined Mirabelle in the bathroom to retrieve more hair and make-up products.</p><p>Claudia snapped a few photos of Poppy sitting at the desk, gazing into the mirror, then lifted the camera away from her face and smiled. “While we have a quick second, I’m going to call Dan and make sure that all of his equipment is set up downstairs for the ceremony, okay?”</p><p>Poppy nodded and thanked the young woman before she retreated through the front door, cell phone pressed to her ear.</p><p>As Poppy listened to the girls laughing and playfully bickering in the other room, she took a deep breath and slowly released it.</p><p>As thankful as she was to have her friends here, she desperately wanted just five minutes to herself. After the rehearsal dinner last night, she and her bridal party had holed up in the hotel, where they drank wine, watched trash tv, painted their nails and took silly online quizzes on their phones.</p><p>Poppy missed her friends terribly and it was fun to catch up with them, to have them all under one roof again, but she’d been surrounded by other people for almost two days now. She hadn’t even <em>slept </em>alone last night; Erdene had crashed out beside her in one queen bed while Danae and Mirabelle shared the other.</p><p>
  <em>Just five minutes.</em>
</p><p>That’s all she wanted. To breathe, to reflect. To celebrate her excitement in her own way. To… maybe sneak down to Tora’s room and steal a good morning kiss.</p><p>As her thoughts turned to the man she would call her husband in just over an hour, Poppy plucked her phone off the wooden desk in front of her. She’d messaged Tora last night, but he hadn’t responded yet. More than likely, he was asleep when she sent it; knowing Tora, he’d conked out early after spending most of yesterday with a large group of people. His introverted self tended to steer clear of his phone after social gatherings, needing time to come down from it all.</p><p>Poppy smiled and set her phone back down; she would see him soon enough.</p><p>A handful of minutes later, the colorful, perfume-y hurricane that was her three friends tore back into the room. They chattered excitedly as Erdene wove another lock of Poppy’s hair into a braid on the other side of her face and Danae swept a light coat of mascara across her eyelashes while Mirabelle pulled Poppy’s wedding dress from its garment bag.</p><p>Before she knew it, the girls were helping Poppy into the fluffy white dress as Claudia moved silently around them, capturing photos as she went. Erdene turned Poppy away from the mirror as she worked on doing up the rouleau buttons in the back; her taller friend insisted Poppy couldn’t see herself until she was completely fastened into the dress.</p><p>“Okay, pretty princess,” her friend said at the same moment Poppy felt Erdene’s hands lift from her back. “Turn around!”</p><p>Poppy sucked in a deep breath and slowly turned to regard her reflection in the full-length mirror. She looked… <em>beautiful. </em></p><p>Her long brown hair fell in soft waves around her shoulders and the matching braids on either side of her head joined at the back in a delicate knot. Her hair being pulled away from her cheeks drew attention to her face; she’d asked Danae not to go <em>too</em> heavy on the makeup, to only go slightly more dramatic than her everyday look and Danae had done just that.</p><p>Poppy’s large brown eyes were highlighted with shades of shimmery copper and gold, her face and lips lightly tinted with a deep rose pink. <em>“Roses and cream,”</em> her granny had always said when Poppy entered the house beet red from playing outside with the neighborhood kids. She smiled softly at the memory; she still looked like herself, that same little girl running around the yard, but more mature, her womanhood accentuated.</p><p>Poppy’s gaze trailed down to her dress: the off-the-shoulder bodice trimmed in white organza flowers, the layers of fluffy tulle that fell in a princess-style skirt to the floor. Elegant ruffles and more organza-petaled flowers swept across the bottom of the dress and formed a cloud-like train behind her.</p><p>Erdene was right; she <em>did</em> look like a princess.</p><p>Poppy finally managed to drag her gaze away from her reflection and looked at Erdene. “Do… do you think he’ll like it?”</p><p>The taller woman snorted. “Girl, if I didn’t just spend an hour doing your hair, I’d whack you upside the head. How can you even ask that?” Erdene smiled and nudged Poppy with an elbow. “His brain is going to short circuit when he sees you. You’re <em>gorgeous</em>.”</p><p>Poppy offered her a small smile. “Thanks, Dene,” she said and gripped her friend’s hand in hers.</p><p>Danae and Mirabelle let out animated ooooh’s and aaaah’s over Poppy as they bustled her train and helped her slide into her white lace sandal flats.</p><p>A gentle knock sounded, causing the circle of girls to break up and Danae hustled over to the front door to “do recon.” Poppy smirked; her blonde friend had been such a bulldog about who was allowed into the room while they prepared for the big day. “I don’t want anyone seeing you before you’re ready,” Danae had told her with a shrug.</p><p>Danae had been that way when they were kids too; she liked to give Poppy a hard time, but she gave a harder time to the people who picked on Poppy or encroached her personal boundaries. When Danae found out Julri cheated on her, it had taken both Poppy and Mirabelle to hold her back from grabbing her car keys and storming out the door to beat his ass.</p><p>Danae peeked through the hole in the door. “It’s the best man and his boyfriend,” she informed the group of girls. “Good to let them in?”</p><p>Poppy laughed. “Yes, Dani. If you don’t, I think Quincey would just try to break the door down anyway.” As much as she loved the blonde man who was about to become her brother, he had been very obstinate about his wedding planning duties, taking them more seriously than he took most things in life.</p><p>Danae opened the door and Quincey swept into the room, looking gorgeous in the navy blue suit Poppy had selected for Tora and his groomsmen. His pink gingham button down was ironed to perfection and paired with a dark blue and pink floral tie.</p><p>The tall, blonde man paused in the doorway in front of Danae. His eyes roamed up and down her petite frame, which was wrapped in a flowing, blush pink maxi dress with a deep v-neck and slit halfway up the skirt.</p><p>“Danae, a vision,” he said appreciatively and moved past her, spouting words of appraisal to Mirabelle and Erdene before making a beeline for Poppy.</p><p>When his gaze landed on her, Quincey gasped and his hands flew to his mouth. “Oh my god, <em>honey</em>,” he murmured, his eyes filling with tears. “You’re <em>radiant. </em>I can’t- I just…” He trailed off as he took a step toward her and gripped her hands in his. “You’re just the prettiest little sister I’ve ever seen.”</p><p>Poppy giggled. “Thanks, Quincey,” she beamed. “You look pretty, too.”</p><p>“Oh, I <em>know</em>,” Quincey winked and pulled at the handkerchief in his jacket pocket to dab at his eyes. “Jonathan, come see Poppy!” he called out to the Dutch man who was chatting with the three girls now sitting on the couch.</p><p>Quincey was tall, but Jonathan was taller, towering over Poppy’s five foot frame. He pushed his long blonde hair out of his face and kindly regarded her with his big, blue eyes. “You look beautiful,” he drawled in his thick accent and stooped to give her a light hug.</p><p>Poppy’s eyes widened as she wrapped her arms around the broad-shouldered man. He’d <em>never</em> hugged her before and when he’d first rejected her attempt to embrace him hello at one of Quincey’s parties, her feelings were hurt until Quincey took her aside and explained that it was nothing personal, just cultural.</p><p>For him to hug her, on today of all days, meant the world and she smiled as she realized her future brother in law’s openness and enthusiasm must have been rubbing off on him.</p><p>“Thanks, Jonathan,” she said as she pulled away and wiped carefully at the tears in her eyes. The taller man retreated to the couch where he picked up a tall nude canvas bag. He brought it to her and she smiled as she pulled out a dark bottle of Dutch wine.</p><p>“This is the wine they served at my parent’s wedding,” he told her. “Quincey helped me find it.”</p><p>“Oh my gosh, how sweet! Thank you so much!” she said and turned to Quincey. “Um, when you head downstairs, would you mind setting this on the bridal table? I want to share it with Tora at the reception.”</p><p>“Sure thing,” Quincey said and tucked the bottle under his arm.</p><p>“I can do it,” Jonathan said and tugged the wine away from his boyfriend. “It’ll give you guys a little time to yourselves.”</p><p>Quincey stood on his tiptoes to give Jonathan a quick peck on the cheek as he moved past him. “Thanks, honey. See you soon.”</p><p>After Poppy heard the click of the front door closing, she turned to Quincey. “So when am I planning <em>your</em> wedding?” she asked and waggled her eyebrows at him.</p><p>“As soon as that giant brute asks me to marry him,” Quincey said dreamily. “We were looking at rings last weekend.”</p><p>“Oh my god, Quincey!” Poppy squealed. “How exciting!”</p><p>“I know, I know,” he laughed and then flicked his hand aimlessly through the air. “Now, enough about me. How are <em>you</em> doing, Pops? You good?”</p><p>A wide grin stretched across her face; she had never been better. “Mmmhmm. Perfect. Have you seen Tora yet? How’s he doing?”</p><p>“Good lord, he’s such a <em>mess</em>,” Quincey sighed.</p><p>“What?” Poppy asked, his words setting off the tiniest alarm in her brain. “Why is he a mess? Is he okay?”</p><p>“Well, I had to fix his boutonniere before he stabbed everyone here who dares to get close enough to hug him. He <em>refuses </em>to wear his tie and he didn’t have a handkerchief for his jacket pocket, so I had to give him my s<em>econd </em>one. Can you <em>believe </em>it?”</p><p>Poppy giggled. She absolutely could. He wasn’t a mess; he was just Tora. “Well, I’m glad you were there to straighten him out, Quincey.”</p><p>“I tell you, you’re both lucky to have me,” the taller man grinned. “Speaking of luck, do you have the four things we talked about?”</p><p>“Yup, I think so. I’m wearing my granny’s pearl earrings from her wedding and you gave Tora that set of cufflinks,” Poppy rattled off. “My dad’s favorite blue tie is wrapped around my bouquet stem and it sounds like you let Tora borrow your handkerchief, so that makes four.”</p><p>Quincey frowned at her. “Honey, <em>you’re the bride. </em>The four items are for <em>you</em>. That’s not how it works!”</p><p>Poppy shrugged and smiled. “It works for us.”</p><p>He let out an exasperated groan. “You’re a mess, honey. An absolute mess. You and that old grump are made for each other.”</p><p>The two of them chatted awhile longer before Quincey decided to leave. “I should head downstairs and make sure everything is ready to go,” he told her. “A wedding planner’s work is never through.”</p><p>Poppy walked him to the door, where he lowered his head to kiss her cheek.</p><p>“Quincey, before you go… um, Tora. How is he? I mean, how is he <em>really</em>?” Not seeing him or hearing from him in several hours was strange and while she knew it meant nothing, she still wanted to feel connected to him somehow.</p><p>Quincey’s face softened into a smile. “He’s pacing like a tiger in a cage,” he murmured. “He’s <em>so</em> excited to see you.”</p><p>Warmth spread through Poppy’s chest. “Yeah?”</p><p>“Yeah. Oh! That reminds me, I’m glad you said something. He asked me to deliver a message to you. <em>Tell Bobby I love her.</em> That’s all. Anyway, I’ll see you soon, honey,” he told her before turning and heading down the hall.</p><p>Poppy grinned and blinked back a fresh batch of tears as she closed the door behind him.</p><p><em>“That’s all</em>,” Quincey had said.</p><p>It was all she needed.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“<em>Grooooom</em> service!” a chipper voice called out from the hallway.</p><p>Tora approached his room door and when he peeked through the peephole to find Quincey’s beaming face on the other side, he groaned and pulled it open.</p><p>“Happy wedding day, booboo!” his younger brother chirped as he sauntered past Tora. “How are you? Almost ready?”</p><p>“Fine, Quince. Lil’ nervous,” Tora replied and closed the door before joining Quincey in the middle of the room.</p><p>“Ooooh, getting cold feet?” Quincey asked.</p><p>“Nah. Feet are warm. Just want everythin’ to go perfect for her today.”</p><p>Quincey waggled his hand in the air aimlessly. “Well, that’s what <em>I’m </em>here for. I’ll make sure it does.”</p><p>“S’what I’m afraid of,” Tora grumbled and popped open another button beneath his shirt collar. There. Now he could breathe a little easier.</p><p>Quincey stared at Tora in horror. “Honey… <em>where’s your tie?</em>”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes. Why had he opened the fucking door? “Tossed it over there somewhere,” he replied, gesturing to the other side of the bed.</p><p>“And why is it over here?” Quincey asked, stooping to retrieve the slip of pink fabric from the floor.</p><p>“Couldn’t tie it. Hands were shaking too bad, so I’m goin’ without.”</p><p>“Um, the hell if you are. I’ll tie it for you.” Quincey advanced on him with the tie in his manicured hands.</p><p>“Ain’t fucking wearing it, Quinceton,” Tora spat and yanked it from the younger man’s grip.</p><p>“Why not?”</p><p>The last thing Tora was going to do was tell Quincey that it reminded him of attending a clan gathering; saying it out loud would make it something <em>real </em>that he’d have to deal with. Not today, of all fucking days.</p><p>When Tora didn’t answer, Quincey tried again. “But I thought you said you wanted everything to be perfect for Poppy today?” he pointed out.</p><p>Tora blinked. He <em>did </em>want that, more than anything. But he also knew that if Poppy knew the real reason he didn’t want to wear a tie, she’d be completely understanding if he went without.</p><p>“Just…uncomfortable,” Tora said at last, casting his eyes to the floor. “And Poppy said she wants me to be comfortable.”</p><p>Quincey must have sensed his unease because he immediately backed off. “Okay, okay.” Quincey’s blue eyes roamed over the rest of Tora’s ensemble and paused at the breast pocket of his jacket. “Where’s your pocket square?”</p><p>Tora shrugged. “Dunno, don’t have one.”</p><p>Quincey pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed impatiently. “You’re a mess, honey. Just… a complete mess.” He plucked the little piece of squared off, white fabric from his own jacket pocket and shoved it into Tora’s. He adjusted it until one pristine corner poked out of the pocket.</p><p>Quincey clapped his hands on either one of Tora’s broad shoulders. “There, perfect,” the blonde man said as he evaluated his older brother once again. When Quincey’s eyes began to fill with tears, Tora snorted and allowed himself to be pulled into a hug.</p><p>“I’m so excited for you,” Quincey blubbered as Tora patted him awkwardly on the back with one hand. “I always hoped I’d see you happy and now here you are.”</p><p>“Thanks, Quince,” Tora mumbled. “Means a lot.”</p><p>Quincey sniffled. “Have you decided where you’re going for the honeymoon?”</p><p>“Nah. We’re just focused on getting through today first-“</p><p>Tora was cut off by Quincey yelping out of nowhere. “Ow, what the hell?” he cried out and pulled away.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Something stabbed me… oh, it was your boutonniere. Why is the pin sticking out of your coat? You could have killed someone!”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes. Quincey had clearly upped his dramatics to an 11 as soon as he’d rolled out of bed that morning. “Best I could do, the pin is so fuckin’ small.”</p><p>“Such a mess,” Quincey said under his breath as he removed the small bundle of flowers from Tora’s lapel and re-pinned it.</p><p>“Okay, now that you’re not falling apart anymore, I’m going to grab Jonathan and we’re going to visit your blushing bride.”</p><p>At this, Tora perked up. It had been less than 24 hours since he’d last seen Poppy but <em>Christ</em>, he missed her.</p><p>“Hey, Quince?” Tora said as his brother approached the door.</p><p>“Yes, honey?”</p><p>“Make sure she’s doin’ okay and uh…”</p><p>Quincey raised his eyebrows at him. “Go <em>ooooon</em>,” he sang.</p><p>“And tell Bobby I love her.”</p><p>Quincey winked. “Will do, bro.”</p><p>---</p><p>Tora stepped out onto the sanded slopes of Kintsugi Beach and took a deep breath of the sea salted air. Amazing how a place that had always seemed forbidden, out of his reach, could feel like home.</p><p>It was 2:45 and the sun was warm on his back, but there was a cool breeze rolling off the gentle swells of ocean water. The sky was clear and blue, not a cloud in sight.</p><p>For the first time since he’d woken up this morning, he felt… <em>comfortable</em>.</p><p>Tora stood by the shoreline a few moments more, reflecting on the day he’d planted one knee firmly into this same sand and asked Poppy to marry him. It was the perfect day, the perfect moment.</p><p>The perfect choice.</p><p>Eventually he made his way over to the area designated for the ceremony. Rows of white wooden chairs were perched in the sand, a rose gold sequined runner separating them. Small glass vases of tiger lilies and peonies sat at the end of every other aisle of the chairs that were slowly being occupied by wedding guests.</p><p>Tora heaved in a deep sigh as he stepped in front of the wood arbor he’d built. At Poppy’s insistence, Quincey was allowed to drape only <em>one </em>curtain of fabric over the top of the structure; she wanted the natural wood and Tora’s workmanship to be on full display.</p><p>His eyes roamed over the crowd that was gathering before him: his coworker Avery’s wife Katrina, Elisabeth, Poppy’s friend from her art class in college, Poppy’s family friends Jacqueline and her young daughter Piper, Gaby and her boyfriend Adam, Sara and her husband.</p><p>Alice grinned up at him from her place in the front row, one of her wrinkled hands resting on the seat of the empty chair beside her. A tiny, engraved gold metal sign hung from the top of the vacant chair, with one word, one <em>name s</em>crawled across it: <em>Joe.</em></p><p>Tora smiled as the glint of the sign caught his eye; that was all Poppylan’s idea. She’d specifically requested there be four empty chairs at the ceremony, all adorned with the names of their deceased loved ones: Joe, Goliath, Tyson and her father, Charles.</p><p><em>“Just because they’re gone doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be there,”</em> she’d said. Quincey agreed wholeheartedly and had custom ordered the signs shortly after.</p><p>“Sup, Big Bro?” the voice of Gyu drifted over from his left and Tora turned to greet his friend. “Ya doing okay?”</p><p>“Better’n okay. Lil’ nervous,” Tora admitted.</p><p>“’Bout what?”</p><p>“Want things to go smooth for Poppylan today. And… I never thought I’d be standing here, ya know? There’s a lot of people, mostly her friends and family, hugging me and shit. Just… not used to it.”</p><p>“I get it, but what’d you expect?” Gyu chuckled. “Ya make Poppy happy and they notice. ‘Course they wanna hug you for that.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Tora breathed. When Gyu put it that way, it didn’t seem so bad. There were definitely worse things.</p><p>“Ugh, Gyu! <em>There </em>you are,” Quincey called out as he jogged up to them. “You can chit chat with the groom later, we’re lining up! Mirabelle’s waiting on you.”</p><p>Tora’s eyes widened.</p><p><em>Shit</em>, it was time?</p><p>“On my way, Quincey,” Gyu said, throwing his hands up in defeat. “Didn’t mean for ya to hafta come looking for me.”</p><p>Quincey sighed. “Well, it’s just that <em>some </em>of us are busier than others. After I walk Erdene down the aisle, I have to loop back around and pick up baby Piper, then I-“</p><p>Tora cut him off. “Pick up Piper?”</p><p>Quincey blinked at him. “<em>Yes</em>. You don’t have a ringbearer or an escort for her. Jacqueline was just going to carry her down the aisle but I told her absolutely not; she’s a guest and deserves to put her feet up for a little bit, so I volunteered.”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes. “Ya gave yourself another job?”</p><p>This was turning out to be a little less his and Poppy’s wedding day and a little more Quincey’s one man show.</p><p>Quincey scoffed at him. “Yes. It’s more work, but it’s the honorable thing to do. Besides, not just <em>anyone </em>can be trusted to do it. Some of us can barely handle being a groomsman,” he said, glaring pointedly at Gyu, who was now standing a couple of feet away, typing on his phone.</p><p>“Gyu! Line! <em>Now!</em>” Quincey barked and rushed up behind the thinner man to swat him on the ass.</p><p>Gyu yelped and cursed at Quincey as they walked away, leaving Tora alone at the front. All of the chairs were full now.</p><p>This was happening.</p><p>This was <em>really</em> happening.</p><p>Inhale.</p><p>Exhale.</p><p>Tora’s heart was thundering so loudly in his ears that he barely heard the light, instrumental music cue up for the bridal party’s entrance. His eyes searched everywhere for Poppy; knowing she was <em>finally here </em>made him frantic to see her. He clasped his hands behind his back to keep them from shaking.</p><p>Tora watched as Avery and Danae stepped out from a silk-walled tent and made their way slowly up the aisle toward him. They parted as they reached the front row of chairs; Avery threw Tora a thumbs up as he walked past and then took his place beside him.</p><p>Grinning widely, Gyu and Mirabelle strode down the runner, arms linked tightly together. When they finally stepped away from each other, Tora thought he saw Gyu blush.</p><p>Quincey and Erdene were next; Tora rolled his eyes as Quincey took notice of Poppy’s glamorous friend Gaby and waved at her in the crowd. She laughed and waved back.</p><p>Once Erdene had taken her place opposite the men, Quincey passed Tora quickly. “Be right back,” he said and looped around the right grouping of chairs to meet Jacqueline in the back. She handed Piper over to Quincey and then retreated to her seat.</p><p>Quincey walked slowly down the aisle, balancing Piper, dressed in a blush pink tutu, in one arm and the basket of flower petals in the other. He paused for a moment to grab a handful of white flowers and flung them across the sand, quietly demonstrating to Piper. The little girl in his grasp giggled, stuffed her tiny fist into the basket and proceeded to try to shove one into her mouth.</p><p>Warm laughter dispersed amongst the small crowd of people as Quincey’s mouth dropped. He laughed then and gently pulled the flower away from Piper’s face. The blonde man kept the basket far out of Piper’s reach as he gradually emptied it of its contents.</p><p>As over the top as his brother could be, Tora had to admit the whole thing was pretty fucking cute. Quincey would be a good uncle one day.</p><p>Once he reached the head of the aisle, Quincey met Poppy’s aunt at the end of the row and passed Piper over to her. Finally, he took his place behind Tora and pretended to act winded from all his running around; the blonde man fanned himself and breathed heavily. Tora smirked and rolled his eyes as more chuckles scattered across the crowd.</p><p>Quincey cleared his throat then as he pulled his speech from his jacket pocket and lifted the microphone from the small stand the DJ had sent up for him.</p><p>“Please stand,” he said into the mike.</p><p>Poppy’s music began to swell as their family and friends rose from their seats.</p><p>Tora held his breath.</p><p>---</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fun fact: Quincey's boyfriend Jonathan is totally inspired by my cousin's Dutch husband. I'm a very affectionate person, as I imagine Poppy is, and the first time he initiated a hug with me, I lost it lol. It was such a special moment and I couldn't help but include it here.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Wedding Day - Part Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora get married. </p><p>Told from Poppy and Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey, guys! I'm finally back with the final part of our favorite couple's wedding day. I hope you all enjoyed the holidays; I know they looked different this year and hopefully you were able to celebrate in a way that made you happy :) </p><p>I have several of you to thank for requesting Tora and Poppy's wedding day:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, TifaEsque, Audrey, RaquelSousa, juliabsquared,<br/>Spotlightgirlontherun, Rollie89 and Mackgurl2020.</p><p>A special thank you and shout out goes to BegoniaRex and my best friend Gaby for beta reading, and being so incredibly supportive. To OneandOnlyTako and JaxStarGazer: thank you for being such encouraging, avid readers and the sweetest souls!</p><p>Thank you all for reading and loving Stages as much as I do. I have about 4-5 more one-shots I'd like to complete for this series before I start on another long beast fic that's been clawing at my brain for months! I can't wait! </p><p>Enjoy! </p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3</p><p>pb&amp;c </p><p>P.S. Tora and Poppy's wedding song is "Heavenly Day" by Patty Griffin (any Haunting of Hill House fans out there?!) and you can listen to it here:</p><p>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZJjjdjIe14</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Oh, heavenly day<br/>
All the clouds blew away<br/>
Got no trouble today with anyone</p><p>The smile on your face, I live only to see<br/>
It's enough for me, baby, it's enough for me<br/>
Oh, heavenly day, heavenly day, heavenly day”</p><p>-Patty Griffin, “Heavenly Day”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora </em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>At this time tomorrow, if someone were to ask Tora about his wedding day, the décor, the flowers, what he was wearing, how many guests were watching from the crowd, who walked the bride down the aisle, he would tell them that he couldn’t remember.</p><p>When Poppy turned the corner and stepped toward him down the aisle, all he could see was her.</p><p>
  
</p><p>There was no room in his chest for anything other than broken breaths, no space left in his mind for more than two words:</p><p>
  <em>Goddamned angel. </em>
</p><p>Tears filled his eyes, blurring his vision and he quickly wiped them away. He didn’t want to miss seeing a moment of this.</p><p>It was in this moment that everything made sense. The feelings of unease, the anxiety he’d felt this morning, for thirty years really, was because he was missing the most important part of his life.</p><p>
  <em>There she was. </em>
</p><p>And just like that, the years of doubt, unhappiness, self-loathing and the sense that he didn’t quite feel whole trickled away from him. This was his choice, the only one he’d ever been given, the most important one.</p><p>The best choice he’d ever made in his whole damn life was drifting across the sand toward him, eyes shining and looking at him like she thought she was the luckiest woman in the world.</p><p>And he was going to spend the rest of his life making sure she never doubted it.</p><p>
  <em>Happy. </em>
</p><p>They were going to be happy.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Poppy</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>At first, Poppy couldn’t look at Tora.</p><p>She wanted to so <em>badly. </em>They’d been separated for almost an entire day and she was dying to be with him again. But she knew that if she did so much as peek up at him, she’d absolutely lose it and cry so hard she wouldn’t be able to see two feet in front of her. So Poppy held her chin high as she turned the corner onto the aisle, gripped her granny’s arm a little more tightly in her own and began the slow walk that led to the love her life.</p><p>Even though her right hand was firmly tucked in her granny’s and her left hand was wrapped securely around the stem of her cascading bouquet of tiger lilies, Poppy could still feel her fingers quivering. She wasn’t nervous or having second thoughts; this was the best thing she would ever do in her life.</p><p>She was <em>excited</em> and trying to ignore the screaming of every cell in her body to dash forward and breathe his name right before pressing her mouth to his.</p><p>Poppy’s bottom lip was trembling, so she smiled a bit wider to keep from sobbing. Her eyes quickly scanned the mass of standing guests surrounding her; she could make out several of her friends and their families dotted through the crowd, her favorite aunt balancing baby Piper in her arms, Alice in the front row beside Joe’s chair.</p><p>
  <em>The front row. </em>
</p><p>Poppy looked up, looked forward and there he was.</p><p>Tora stood tall against the wooden arbor, his broad shoulders backlit by the summer sun. His whole body was angled toward her and he was looking at her with so much love in his eyes that she nearly collapsed.</p><p>
  <em>How was she so lucky?</em>
</p><p>Poppy immediately burst into tears as she and her granny paused at the head of the aisle. The older woman pulled her into a tight hug, which caused her to cry harder.</p><p>“I love you, baby,” her granny whispered into her hair. “I’m so happy for you.”</p><p>“I love you too, Granny,” Poppy choked out.</p><p>Her granny released her and cupped her withered hands around Poppy’s face for a moment. Granny grasped Poppy’s right hand in hers as she then turned to Tora, who dragged his eyes away from Poppy to meet the old woman’s gaze. Granny grinned up at him as she tapped her cheek with one finger. Tora chuckled and stooped low enough to give her a quick kiss. </p><p>Granny reached for Tora’s hand and gripped it for a moment before bringing it forward to wrap around Poppy’s. Once his calloused hand swallowed hers, a fresh wave of tears poured from her eyes. She was barely able to register her granny taking her seat in the front row on the other side of Alice or Erdene fluffing the train of her dress and pulling the bouquet from her hands.</p><p>In this moment, nothing existed. Not the sniffling of Quincey or the crashing of waves behind him. There was room only for the man standing before her, his deep, ragged breaths, the way he was looking at her and the flash of red in his hair, which she immediately recognized as her strawberry hair tie.</p><p>Poppy swallowed hard and somehow managed to find her voice. “Hi,” she whispered to him.</p><p>Tora took her other hand in his and squeezed them both tightly. “Hi,” he murmured back, his eyes shining. “You’re beautiful.”</p><p>“So are you.”</p><p>Quincey cleared his throat then and spoke into the mic. “Welcome family, friends and loved ones. Thank you for gathering here today to celebrate the union of Poppy and Tora. We are all here to support this commitment of love…”</p><p>For Poppy, the rest of Quincey’s speech faded in and out; she could make out a few words here and there but paid them no mind. The only words she could hear were the ones Tora had uttered to her in bed the night before last.</p><p>They’d agreed weeks before that they wouldn’t write their own vows; Tora admitted that he was nervous about speaking in front of a crowd, especially something that he’d written specifically for her. In the end, they altered a set of traditional wedding vows, replacing the phrase “’til death do us part” with the words “for as long as we both shall live.”</p><p>“Don’t want that word anywhere <em>near</em> our day,” Tora told her.</p><p>She didn’t have to ask which one he meant.</p><p>As Quincey continued, Poppy stared at Tora’s mouth. It curled up at the corners and she returned his grin as she pictured his lips forming his private vows to her.</p><p>
  <em>"Poppylan, I’m not sayin’ it’ll always be easy, but I promise I’ll never run away from our problems. I’ll only ever run towards ya.”</em>
</p><p>His thumb rubbed a gentle line across the knuckles of her left hand, pausing on her ring finger.</p><p>
  <em>“I’ll always be right there for you and do whatever I hafta to be a good husband and an even better father.”</em>
</p><p>That night, Poppy had cried and sucked in a large breath, then slowly released it against his bare chest. It was the biggest <em>relief</em>, to hear those words spoken by the one she loved and knowing she could believe them unwaveringly.</p><p>“Tora,” Quincey’s voice said as it broke through her thoughts, “please repeat after me.” Quincey held the microphone out to Tora, who shook his head at his brother.</p><p>Quincey narrowed his eyes at the taller man and then shrugged. He clicked the mic off and set it back in the stand.</p><p>Poppy giggled as Tora smirked at her; as annoying as Quincey found Tora’s stubbornness, she on the other hand found it completely endearing. The words they were about to proclaim were meant only for each other anyway; why did anyone else need to hear them?</p><p>“I, Tora, take you Poppylan, as ya are, I promise from this day forward to love and treasure you…”</p><p>
  <em>Lost. </em>
</p><p>She was lost in him.</p><p>She blinked and then Quincey was asking her to repeat after him.</p><p>“…to be grateful for all that you are and for choosing to spend the rest of your journey with me…”</p><p>Poppy made it halfway through her vows before she began to sob. Tora flashed her a smile so wide that his eyes crinkled at the corners and his dimples bloomed in his face. She smiled back and fought through her sniffles and choked breaths to finish the words; he deserved to hear each one as clearly as possible.</p><p>When she was finished speaking, Quincey picked up the microphone. “Your rings represent the promise you’ve just made to each other. The never-ending circle is a symbol of an infinite, unbreakable love.”</p><p>Quincey tucked his hand into the chest of his suit jacket and when he withdrew it, their wedding bands were in his palm.</p><p>“Tora, take this ring and place it on Poppy’s finger. Repeat after me.”</p><p>With a trembling hand, Tora slid the dainty, gold band halfway down her left ring finger; it was decorated with a row of tiny white diamonds that glinted in the sun.</p><p>His eyes never left hers as he murmured the words recited by Quincey.</p><p>Then she was taking Tora’s ring and holding it up to his face so he could see it.  He squinted at the thick, gold textured band and his eyes glossed over as they caught the surprise words she’d had engraved on the inside.</p><p>
  <em>Try and stop us. </em>
</p><p>Poppy took his left hand in hers then and repeated the words Quincey spoke. She slid the band down his finger and she was complete.</p><p>“Having p-pledged your love and promise to one another t-today in front of your family and f-friends,” Quincey sputtered, his face wet from crying, “by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Honey, kiss her already!”</p><p> <em>He was her husband. She was his wife.</em></p><p>It was the most natural thing in the world, reaching up for him. She enthusiastically threw her arms around his neck as he lowered his head to hers. One of his hands curled around her waist, the other cupped the back of her head and their lips met.</p><p>Her heart thumped in pleasant surprise; he wasn’t typically fond of kissing in front of people, but his mouth was moving firmly, unabashedly against hers. She could <em>feel </em>every word he’d said to her today, how he’d meant them with his whole heart.</p><p>Tora’s shivering fingers wound through her hair and then she felt the slight tug of her veil pulling away from the braided knot on her head.</p><p>He lifted his face from hers; the veil was in his left hand and his eyes widened.</p><p>“Shit,” he murmured and she began to laugh. Erdene had purposely styled her hair so the veil would come out easily when she was ready to lift it out for the reception. Maybe a little <em>too </em>easily.</p><p>Poppy continued laughing as she heard Quincey mutter “Such a mess” under his breath.</p><p>Tora grabbed Poppy’s left hand and Erdene passed her bouquet back to her as they turned to face their guests.</p><p>“Friends and family,” Quincey spoke out from behind them, “it is my honor to introduce to you: Mr. and Mrs. Murakami!”</p><p>Applause and cheers broke out across the crowd as Tora and Poppy stepped onto the aisle. He gripped her hand tightly in his and lifted her veil high above his head with the other. Poppy giggled as she gazed up at his smirking face.</p><p>In ten years, if there was just one moment of their wedding day she looked back on with a smile, it would be this.</p><p>Tora, laughing. Her husband, feeling the freedom to be himself in the middle of a crowd of people who loved him.</p><p>---</p><p>One by one, Poppy and Tora greeted their guests in the receiving line. Granny and Alice walked down the aisle together, arms linked, and were snickering like little girls as they approached.</p><p>“Get down here, boy,” Alice said as she withdrew from Granny. Tora smirked at the old woman and stooped down low to give her a hug. She wrapped her arms around his neck and then whacked him in the back of the head with one small, wrinkled hand.</p><p>Tora immediately jolted upright, rubbing at his assaulted scalp and Poppy laughed; it was so obvious where he’d learned that old habit.</p><p>“Christ Alice, on my fuckin’ wedding day?” he grumbled at her.</p><p>Alice pointed one finger up and squinted at him. “Take care of her,” she said and then moved on to Poppy.</p><p>“You make <em>sure </em>he takes care of you, little lady,” Alice said as she pulled her in. “If he ever disrespects you, send him my way. I taught him better than that.”</p><p>Poppy giggled and pressed a kiss to Alice’s withered cheek. “Don’t worry, Alice. If he disrespects me, I’ll take care of him myself.”</p><p>Alice cackled and patted Poppy on the head. “Good.”</p><p>Poppy glanced over the old woman’s shoulder to see Granny tug Tora down for a hug. She watched as he leaned his head in close while her grandmother cupped her hand over one of his ears and whispered to him. When Granny pulled away, Tora smiled and nodded, mouthing something back to her that Poppy couldn’t make out.</p><p>“Congratulations!” Granny cried as she leaned in and embraced Poppy. “I couldn’t have picked a better man for you. You did good, baby girl.”</p><p>“Thanks, Granny. I think I’ll keep him,” Poppy smiled and then curiosity took over. “What did you say to Tora?”</p><p>Granny tilted her head at Poppy in mock confusion. “When?”</p><p>“Just now, when you were giving him a hug. I saw you whisper something to him. What did you say?”</p><p>There was a mischievous light in her grandmother’s eyes as she answered. “You’ll find out.”</p><p>Before Poppy could question her further, Granny moved down the line to chat with Erdene, Danae and Mirabelle.</p><p>Poppy’s friend Elisabeth appeared in front of her; they’d met in an art class in college and bonded quickly over their creativity. The taller, slender girl had short, curly red hair and eyes darker than Poppy’s. Elisabeth looked very much like an artist in her tie-dyed halter maxi dress; it flowed around her as she rushed up to wrap Poppy in a hug.</p><p>They chatted excitedly about the wedding for a moment and as Elisabeth moved to step away, she turned back to Poppy.</p><p>“Oh, I want to tell you something before I forget. Make sure you open my wedding gift tonight, before you go to bed. You’re going to need it.”</p><p>Out of the corner of her eye, Poppy saw Tora smirk. She blushed.  </p><p>“Er… not like <em>that</em>!” Elisabeth laughed, waving her hands in the air as she walked away. “Just… you’ll see what I mean!”</p><p>---</p><p>“Why the hell does everythin’ have to be so fuckin’ small?”</p><p>Poppy giggled as Tora released another string of quiet curses behind her. They were in her hotel room and his large fingers were currently trying to work open the buttons of her wedding dress. From the sound of it, they were failing miserably.</p><p>Quincey insisted and eventually ordered Poppy to choose two dresses for the big day. “Two outfits, honey. You’re definitely having two. Your dream princess dress and a shorter one for the reception. You can’t dance properly in a long dress, Pops. And you need that long train to walk down the aisle in. So… <em>two.</em>”</p><p>As Tora continued to struggle and tug at the dress, Poppy glanced back at him. “It’s okay if you can’t get it. I can always call Erdene up here-“</p><p>“No,” he told her sternly. “If there’s one thing I know how to do, it’s fuckin’ undress ya, woman. I’ll get it, just gimme a minute.”</p><p>She laughed and kept her hair pulled tight over her shoulder. “Okay, tiger. You got this.”</p><p>After several minutes, Poppy finally felt the last of the buttons pop open. Tora’s rough hands roamed across her back and then shimmied the dress down her body until it was a puddle of tulle on the floor.</p><p>“Christ,” he rasped as she stepped out of the dress and faced him in her strapless bra and white lacy panties. “Ya sure we gotta go back downstairs?”</p><p>“Yes, we do,” she smiled and touched her palms to his chest. “But… not for about ten more minutes.”</p><p>A low hum of approval rumbled in Tora’s throat as he lowered his head to kiss her. He pressed his lips to hers softly at first, then more firmly as one of his big hands cupped the back of her head, the other curling tightly around her waist.</p><p>Poppy crushed herself against his warm, hard body and opened her mouth to him. His insistent tongue plumbed the depths of her, eliciting a soft groan from her throat. Tora’s hand moved from her waist to her bottom and he squeezed roughly, jarring her pelvis into his.</p><p>His mouth lifted from hers then and she was left panting as his lips blazed a trail across her jawline and down her neck. Tora began to nibble at <em>that </em>spot just below her ear and Poppy moaned. Though they’d been together for several years, the man could still make her completely forget where she was, just by touching his lips to her skin.</p><p>When Tora’s hand trailed down to stroke her over her underwear, Poppy sighed and reluctantly pulled away from him. If she let this continue, they’d be late for their own reception.</p><p>Tora let out a disappointed groan as she took a step back from him and retrieved her white, knee-length dress from its hanger.</p><p>“Just a couple more minutes, Bobby,” he said, his molten eyes pleading.</p><p>“Uh uh, I’ve heard that one before,” Poppy replied as she pulled the dress up her legs. “Remember? We were late to Quincey’s birthday party last year, Mr. ‘I’ll Be Quick.’ He <em>still </em>hasn’t forgiven us; he told me so last week. Do you <em>really</em> want to answer to him today?”</p><p>“No,” Tora grumbled and plopped down on the bed.</p><p>“There will be time for that later,” she giggled as she tugged the spaghetti straps over her shoulders. “That’s what wedding nights and honeymoon suites are for.”</p><p>Poppy stepped in front of him and turned, brushing her hair away from her back. “Would you mind zipping me up?”</p><p>Tora closed the back of the dress and then pinched her bottom. She yelped in surprise and swatted playfully at his arm.</p><p>“Tora!” she laughed, spinning around to catch the wicked smile on his face. She reached out a hand to him. “Are you ready?”</p><p>He gestured down at the erection straining against his pants. “Need just a minute,” he chuckled.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“First off, I’m the reason we’re all here today, so I want to say <em>you’re welcome,</em>” Quincey said as he strutted across the sand, microphone in one hand and a champagne flute in the other.</p><p>“Tora and Poppy met at a house party of mine years ago. It was love at first sight. For <em>him</em>, anyway. In an attempt to woo her, he ripped his shirt off. In the middle of my kitchen. Right in front of her.” Quincey paused and stared pointedly at Tora as the crowd broke into laughter around them.</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes and smirked as Poppy snorted beside him at the bridal table. Erdene let out a catcall from the other side of his wife.</p><p>“You know those annoying little male birds, they puff out their colorful feathers and dance around to get the female’s attention? It was just like that. The only difference is…” Quincey lowered his voice to a whisper and brought the mic closer to his face, “the birds can <em>actually</em> dance<em>. </em>Tigers? Not so much. You’ll see later, folks.”</p><p>“Gonna be one less brother before the night’s over with,” Tora mumbled to Poppy as he shifted in his chair to slide his jacket off. He loved the beach, but it was fucking hot out.</p><p>Their guests laughed again as Quincey continued. “THEN, on the day Tora finally gets to call Poppy his wife, he rips the veil right off her head. No one can stay dressed around this man! NO ONE IS SAFE.”</p><p>Quincey turned to face Tora then and cackled as he caught him sliding his suit jacket down his arms. “This is what I’m talking about, people! He has a <em>serious problem</em>.”</p><p>Poppy doubled over in laughter next to him, smacking playfully at his arm. Tora smirked as he removed the jacket, balled it up and sent it hurtling toward his brother. Quincey managed to catch it with the hand gripping the microphone and swung it around so it hung from his shoulders like a cape.</p><p>“Rude, honey,” Quincey said and cleared his throat. “Now, as I was saying…”</p><p>As Quincey continued his standup comedy routine, Tora leaned forward in his seat and picked up the glass of dark red wine Poppy poured for him. He sniffed at it and wrinkled his nose; it smelled like old, bitter fruit.</p><p>Poppy poked him in the arm. “Everything okay?” she whispered.</p><p>“Don’t drink, Pops,” he murmured back to her. “Can’t stand the taste. Sorry.”</p><p>“I know, but would you pretend to take a sip of it? At least for Quincey’s toast? It’s our gift from Jonathan; it’s the wine that was served at his parent’s wedding.”</p><p>Well, shit.</p><p>“Sure,” he whispered. Tora wrapped his hand around her knee as he turned his attention back to Quincey.</p><p>After several minutes of teasing and heartfelt sentiments, Quincey lifted his champagne in the air. “If everyone would please join me and raise your glasses in a toast to the happy couple. To Tora and Poppy, my favorite love story. I couldn’t have written it better myself.”</p><p>With a smirk on his face, Tora clinked his glass of wine against his wife’s, took a deep breath and knocked the entire thing back in one long gulp. There was a reason he hadn’t had a drink in years; he was unpleasantly reminded of why as he shut his eyes and winced against the horrible taste.</p><p>He looked at Poppy then and she was staring at him with wide eyes and a large, disbelieving smile plastered across her face. She leaned forward and gave him a kiss, the same bitter flavor on her breath.</p><p>This time, he didn’t mind it.</p><p>---</p><p>Tora and Poppy stood in front of the cake table, surrounded by their friends and family. Claudia circled them like a shark, leaving only the faint sounds of her camera shuttering in her wake.</p><p>The cake was simple and frosted with thick, white icing; it had three tiers and a cascade of tiger lilies trailing down one side.</p><p>Tora smiled as he eyed the cake topper. He’d helped pick it out; it was two figurines that Quincey had custom ordered to look practically identical to Tora and Poppy, right down to the size and height difference. The figure of Tora was stooping to kiss the tiny statue of Poppy, who was looking up at him from where she stood on a small stool.</p><p>“Ready, shorty?” Tora asked as he wrapped his fingers around the handle of the cake knife. Poppy playfully scowled up at him as she placed her hand over his.</p><p>“Oh, can it, you big thug,” she teased and then turned her attention to the task at hand.</p><p>Together they cut smoothly into the bottom tier of the cake and carved out a piece. Poppy laid it out onto a dish and pinched a decent-sized portion between two fingers. Tora did the same.</p><p>“Come here, Tora,” Poppy said, grinning up at him with a wicked glint in her eyes.</p><p>He smirked. “Don’t eat sweets, Bobby.”</p><p>“Oh, I know you don’t, tiger. Now get down here.”</p><p>Tora chuckled, knowing full well what was coming. He lowered his head so she could reach him and at the same time, they smashed a handful of fluffy cake and icing into each other’s faces.</p><p>Tora’s hands were bigger and better able to distribute more frosting; Poppy’s forehead and rounded cheeks were covered in the stuff. She looked up at him, laughing hard as she pulled icing out of her eyelashes.</p><p>“Give me a kiss!” she cried out and when he bent down to do just that, she grabbed his shirt collar with both of her tiny hands and rubbed her cheeks across the length of his face, transferring globs of icing onto his skin.</p><p>“Little shit,” he laughed as he ducked his head to touch his lips to hers.</p><p>---</p><p>Once the majority of the cake had been cut and served, the DJ announced it was time for their first dance. Tora immediately began scouring the crowd for the brunette head of his wife; after they’d cleaned up in the restrooms, Poppy had eaten a piece of cake and then been pulled aside by Claudia to take a couple of pictures with her granny and bridesmaids.</p><p>That’d been about ten minutes ago. Who knew where she was now? Poppy was far too short to track in a crowd and Tora smirked at the thought.</p><p>He prowled around the side of the dance floor, his feet shifting and dipping in the slopes of sand. He rolled his eyes as he passed Quincey and Jonathan standing at Gaby and Adam’s table. Quincey was holding a mixed drink of some kind in one hand and petting Gaby’s blush pink fur coat with the other.</p><p>Tora snorted. That poor fucking woman.</p><p>Finally, Poppy came into view. She was standing on the other side of the wooden dance floor holding a glass of wine and chatting with her friends Elisabeth and Sara. Elisabeth was standing facing away from Poppy, flexing and showing off the teal and pink wing tattoos that extended from the middle of her back to halfway down her arms.</p><p>Sara, a shorter woman with long dark hair and eyes, was also standing with her back to Poppy, tapping at her right shoulder, where the top of an elaborate tattoo peeked over the fabric of her strapless orange and purple floral dress.</p><p>As Tora strode closer, he could slightly make out what they were saying.</p><p>“I don’t know, guys,” Poppy said. “Doesn’t it hurt?”</p><p>“No!” Sara cried just as Elisabeth answered “Depends. Biceps, no. Elbows, yes.”</p><p>“Er- okay, yes, it <em>does</em> hurt,” Sara admitted. “But it’s totally worth it! Especially if it’s something that means a lot to you.”</p><p>“Absolutely,” Elisabeth agreed. “This was my first one and I had <em>two </em>guys working on me. It’s fine! Besides, you know Tora would love it.”</p><p>Poppy laughed. “I’ll think about it, okay? Maybe I’ll surp-“ She trailed off as her gaze landed on Tora and she flashed him a big smile.</p><p>“Hey, handsome,” she greeted him.</p><p>“Mind if I borrow my wife for a sec?” Tora asked her two friends as he took her tiny hand in his. “They’re wantin’ us to dance or some shit.”</p><p>“Sure, but you can’t keep her!” Sara teased as Poppy passed her the wine glass.</p><p>“Bring her back in the same condition you found her!” Tora heard Elisabeth call behind them as he led Poppy to the dance floor.</p><p>Soft, folksy plucking of an acoustic guitar drifted from the speakers and Tora’s right hand instinctively curled around Poppy’s waist. Her left arm wove around to his back and she gripped his free hand in hers, holding it tightly against her chest. Slowly, they began to rock side to side.</p><p>Poppy looked up at him with her big brown eyes and smiled. “I knew you could dance!”</p><p>Tora chuckled. “Don’t think swayin’ really counts, sweetheart.”</p><p>“Yes, it does. And you’re great at it.”</p><p>“I’m better at horizontal dancin’,” he said and she laughed.</p><p>“Well, I won’t really argue that,” she mumbled and pressed her cheek into his chest. Her grip on his back tightened and he smiled.</p><p>It was funny: years ago, he would’ve rather shot himself in the foot than been in the middle of a dance floor with several pairs of eyes on him. While he’d eventually grown used to being stared at over the years, he’d never truly gotten over his hatred of it.</p><p>And now? Now he didn’t hate it. In all honesty, he couldn’t even <em>feel</em> it. In this moment, all he felt was Poppy’s curves molded against him, the steady rise and fall of her breath, the comfortable weight and warmth of her head resting just beneath his heart.</p><p>And even more than that, knowing she <em>wanted </em>to be there in his arms, she’d <em>chosen </em>him in front of everyone she loved in the world, meant more to him than he could explain. The once pathetic thing that sat lifelessly in his chest now felt close to bursting; who knew a five foot nothing woman would take up so much space in his heart, his life?</p><p>Distantly he knew there was a song playing somewhere but he couldn’t make sense of the lyrics. Instead, a soundtrack of a different sort wove through his head like a shiny ribbon; there was no music, just the sound of Poppy’s voice and the simple words she’d uttered to him over the years that meant so <em>much.</em></p><p>
  <em>I want to. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I trust you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I love you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>You’re perfect for me.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I'm not going anywhere.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Try and stop me.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I wouldn’t want to have kids with anyone else.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Wear it however you’re comfortable.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>For as long as we both shall live.</em>
</p><p>Eventually, the words faded and were replaced with just one; it stretched and echoed in his mind, leaving space for nothing else.</p><p>
  <em>Heaven. </em>
</p><p>This was fucking heaven.</p><p>---</p><p>After Tora and Poppy finished their first dance, the floor became flooded with people as the DJ began playing some upbeat pop song. They watched their friends and family dance wildly and laughed as Quincey attempted to drag his six foot five boyfriend to the floor.</p><p>They gradually wove their way through the tables, taking the time to visit with the guests who were still seated. When they approached a blonde, wavy haired woman Tora recognized as Poppy’s cousin Harper, she jumped out of her chair and grabbed Poppy in a hug.</p><p>“Harper!” Poppy squealed. “I’m so glad you made it!”</p><p>“Me too!” her cousin beamed as they pulled apart. “I went straight home from work, threw a dress on Addie and we hauled ass here.”</p><p>“Did you get somethin’ to eat?” Tora asked as he reached out and shook Harper’s hand.</p><p>“Yup! We both did. Actually, I’m glad you’re here, Tora. I know it’s a busy night for you guys, but ever since she saw you two dancing, Addie’s been going on and on about wanting to dance with the ‘big man.’”</p><p>Poppy snorted as Tora’s eyes widened.</p><p>“If it’s not too much trouble, would you mind dancing to a slow song with her?” Harper asked just as the curly, red-haired head of her five year old daughter Addie peeked out from behind her mother. Her big brown eyes blinked up at him curiously.</p><p>“Oh, he’d love to!” Poppy cried out before Tora could say a word. He’d rarely ever interacted with children before; not really at all since he was one, anyway. Now he was just going to be trusted to dance with this tiny little thing? What if he fucking… <em>broke </em>her?</p><p>As if the goddamn DJ was conspiring against him, the pop rock song that had been blaring from the speakers came to an end and the beginning of a soft, slow song took its place. Tora’s heart thumped hard in his chest. When was the last time he’d been this afraid?</p><p>“Oooh, there you go, Addie, time to dance!” Poppy said as she squatted down to the little girl’s level and tapped her lightly on the nose with one finger. His wife then turned her head and looked up at him. “Well, come on, big man. Come get your girl,” she grinned.</p><p>Tora swallowed and stepped forward. Poppy backed away as he crouched down on one knee in front of Addie. “Wanna dance?” he asked and held his hand out to her.</p><p>Addie nodded shyly at him and wrapped one tiny hand around his finger.  </p><p>He had to stoop so fucking <em>low </em>to keep his hand in hers as he led her out onto the dance floor. How the <em>fuck </em>was he going to do this?</p><p>When their feet hit the tiled wood floor, Addie stood in front of him in her sparkly purple dress. Without letting go of his hand, she stepped up and propped her little sandal-clad feet onto his shoes.</p><p>That’s right. Poppy said her dad used to dance with her like this all the time. He could handle this.</p><p>Tora reached for Addie’s other hand, but it was gripped tightly around some red and blue stuffed animal. He began to rock gently on his feet, swaying back and forth to the slow beat of the music.</p><p>He glanced down at Poppy’s little cousin nervously. Was she having fun? Did she want to stop? What the <em>fuck </em>did you say to a kid?</p><p>He could say he liked her dress, but she’d probably see right through his bullshit. Complimenting a bright-colored, sparkly dress was more Poppy’s department. His eyes roamed across the top of her head, looking for a cute hair tie or barrette to mention. Maybe he could bend down to show her the strawberry tie in his own hair?</p><p>He frowned as he realized there were no accessories tucked into her curls.</p><p>
  <em>Strike two. </em>
</p><p>As Tora kept rocking back and forth on his feet, his gaze landed on the flash of red tucked under her arm. Obviously the toy was a favorite of hers or she wouldn’t have dragged it to the wed-</p><p>
  <em>Wait a minute. Wait a fucking minute. </em>
</p><p>Was it… a triceratops?</p><p>
  <em>Bingo. </em>
</p><p>Tora cleared his throat and looked down at his tiny dancing partner. “So… uh, ya like dinosaurs?”</p><p>Addie looked up at him for the first time and grinned. “Mmmhmm,” she said.</p><p>“Me too,” he replied. “What’s yer favorite?”</p><p>Without speaking, Addie bobbed the toy up and down in her arm as if to say <em>This one. Duh. </em></p><p>Tora laughed. “Oh yeah? What’s it called? Can’t remember.”</p><p>“Triceratops,” Addie said clearly and smoothly.</p><p>Smart kid.</p><p>“Oh yeah, triceratops are pretty cool. My favorite was always the t-rex.”</p><p>Addie shook her head adamantly.</p><p>Tora gasped in feigned shock. “<em>W</em><em>hat?</em>” he asked incredulously. “Ya don’t like t-rex?”</p><p>“Nope,” she replied in her light, airy little voice. “Too scary.”</p><p>“Nah, they’re not so bad,” he told her. “They’re just big ol’ dorks with long legs like me-“ he picked his feet up high off the ground and Addie squealed with laughter “-and short little arms like you.”</p><p>Tora gripped her hand in his and swung it around goofily. Addie giggled again.</p><p>“Ya know, I can’t remember the sound they make. Can you?”</p><p>Addie nodded and let out a low growl.</p><p>Tora cupped one hand around his ear and lowered his head. “What? Sorry, I can’t hear ya all the way up here. Can you do it again?”</p><p>Addie perked up and let out a roar.</p><p>Before Tora knew what was happening, Addie left her perch on his shoes and they began stomping in circles around each other, letting out growls and roars that grew louder and louder. At the end of the song, Tora took Addie’s hand in his and led her back to her mom.</p><p>“Did you have fun, Addie May?” Harper asked as she hauled her daughter up into her arms. Addie nodded and smiled as she told her mother about dancing with the dinosaur man.</p><p>Tora’s mouth twitched up at the corners as he listened to the little girl recount the silly dance they shared. He was glad she had fun, that he hadn’t intimidated or scared her.</p><p>At that moment, he felt two tiny arms wrap around his waist and then heard the voice of his wife floating up from behind him. “You looked like you were having a good time, mister,” she said. He could hear the smile in her voice.</p><p>“Yeah,” he said and rested one hand over hers. “Addie might be a better dancer than you.”</p><p>Poppy giggled and squeezed him tightly against her. He turned in her arms and looked down at her; her big brown eyes were glossy, alive with light and tears.</p><p>“What?” he asked softly.</p><p>Poppy smiled. “Nothing.”</p><p>---</p><p>Quincey was in rare fucking form.</p><p>Tora wasn’t sure how much alcohol his younger brother had consumed, but it was enough that he was being an annoying little shit. At one point, Tora found him standing at a table with Poppy, convincing her to take a shot of Fireball with him.</p><p>As Tora approached, Quincey’s face broke out into a wide grin. “Tiger Booooy! Take a shot with me and Little Miss Wifey!”</p><p>Tora shook his head. “Ya know I don’t drink, Quince.” Then he peered down at Poppy. “Doin’ okay?” he asked her.</p><p>Her wide eyes were bright and her cheeks were slightly flushed. “Uh huh. I’ve had two shots of this and I drank a bunch of wine. Tora, I seriously don’t feel a thing. I’m not even buzzed.”</p><p>He chuckled. “Probably sweat it all out, sweetheart. You’ve been dancin’ for the last hour.”</p><p>She smiled. “True.”</p><p>“Oooh, Poppy, come dance with me!” Quincey cooed as he set the half empty bottle of booze on the table. He reached for her hands and she gently pulled away.</p><p>“I think I need a break, Quincey,” she laughed.</p><p>“Ugh, you two are <em>already</em> that boring, old married couple. I’m going to see if Jacqueline and Piper want to dance.”</p><p>Tora and Poppy watched as Quincey waltzed off in the direction of Jacqueline and her daughter. To their surprise, Jacqueline stood, Piper in tow and followed Quincey to the dance floor. A slow song was playing and as the young woman began to sway with Piper balanced against her chest, Quincey wrapped his arms around both of them. His rhythm was off as he rocked back and forth; Jacqueline threw her head back and laughed as Quincey began belting the lyrics to the Journey song.</p><p>“Aw, Quincey’s so cute,” Poppy said as she leaned back into Tora.</p><p>Tora snorted. “Least someone thinks so.”</p><p>As the song ended and a fast-paced hip pop song blared through the air, Quincey took off running in the direction of Gaby and her boyfriend Adam.</p><p>Tora groaned. “That poor fucking woman.”</p><p>“What?” Poppy asked as she stared off in the direction of Quincey and her friends.</p><p>“He’s been after her all night, petting her coat and shit. C’mon, let’s go get him.”</p><p>Poppy giggled as Tora grabbed her hand and dragged her over to Gaby’s table. Quincey said something in a high-pitched voice that Tora couldn’t make out and Gaby cackled at him as she jumped out of her chair.</p><p>“Quince,” Tora said, his voice a low warning. “For Christ’s sake, leave her alone.”</p><p>His brother scowled at him. “Pfft, she finds me charming, unlike <em>some </em>people.”</p><p>As if to prove his point, Gaby yanked on Quincey’s hand and began backing away toward the tiled platform. “Quinceeey, come dance with us!”</p><p>Quincey threw a look back at Tora that plainly said <em>I told you so </em>before following his newfound friends to the dance floor. He splayed his arms out and gripped each of their hands; he spun Adam and Gaby around on either side of him as they howled with laughter.</p><p>“And he fuckin’ calls <em>me </em>a mess,” Tora grumbled.</p><p>Poppy giggled and interlaced her fingers with his. “Cheer up, you old grump. At least they’re keeping him busy and we have a little time to ourselves.”</p><p>
  <em>Time to themselves. </em>
</p><p>Tora gazed out at the writhing bodies on the wood floor; a majority of their guests had been drinking and were distracted by the music or leftover food.</p><p>It was perfect timing.</p><p>Tora looked down at his wife. “Wanna go somewhere with me, Bobby?”</p><p>“Sure,” she beamed at him.</p><p>He clasped her hand tightly and led them away from the floor. They slipped behind the bridal table, where Tora scooped up his suit jacket from the back of his chair. They wove through the maze of tables and past the ice sculpture of an angel that Quincey claimed their reception could <em>not </em>go without.</p><p>Now that it was dark and the temperature had dropped significantly, it looked like the stupid thing had finally stopped melting.</p><p>They quickly darted past Gyu and Mirabelle, who were getting their photo taken by Claudia. Gyu proudly held up the white garter he’d caught and Mirabelle clutched the bundle of flowers she’d seized during the bouquet toss.</p><p>Tora continued to lead Poppy away from the party until they neared the ocean’s gently tumbling edge. He turned to her, wrapped her in his jacket and then plopped down in the sand. He gestured to the spot next to him.</p><p>Poppy hunkered down beside him and leaned into him. “What are we doing?” she asked.</p><p>He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close. “After the wedding, when we were standin’ in line, your granny told me that at some point during the reception, I should take ya somewhere quiet so we could have ten minutes to ourselves.”</p><p>“Aw, really?” she murmured.</p><p>“Yeah. Said that even the best days can be overwhelming and we should take some time to just be together and relax.” He gazed around and then pointed to the leaning banalo tree over his right shoulder. “See that tree there? I remember it from when I proposed to ya. Think this is close to the right spot.”</p><p>Poppy blinked up at him. “I love you.”</p><p>Tora smirked and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Love ya, too.”</p><p>After a moment, Tora leaned them back so they were laying across the sand, pressed against each other, their knees bent toward the sky. He breathed quietly, in and out, as he regarded the pinpoints of starlight above them.</p><p>“So what did you think about today?” Poppy murmured. Her voice was so soft that it was almost lost across the sound of lapping water.</p><p>Tora thought for a moment before turning his head to answer her. “It was the best.”</p><p>She smiled. “Yeah?”</p><p>“Yeah. Best fuckin’ day of my life.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Poppy</em> </strong>
</p><p><strong>  </strong> <strong>---</strong></p><p>It was one in the morning when the last guest went home and the beach finally cleared. The bridal party stayed behind to help clean up before retreating to their respective hotel rooms. Jonathan was practically carrying a half-asleep Quincey toward the elevator. When her brother in law spotted the two of them in the hall, he perked up and threw his arms around them.</p><p>“I love you both <em>so much</em>,” he said. “You’re my favorite-“ Quincey planted a big, sloppy kiss on Poppy’s cheek “-and you’re my favorite.” He strained to reach Tora’s face, but couldn’t so he settled for blowing him a kiss instead. “And now you’re m-married and- and-“ Giant globs of tears began running down his cheeks and Jonathan sighed as he hauled him through the elevator doors.</p><p>Poppy slipped inside and Tora managed to squeeze in with the small cart hauling their gifts. Poppy did her best to comfort the sobbing Quincey as they rode to the fifth floor.</p><p>“What’s wrong?” she asked as she rubbed at his arm.</p><p>“I-I… I’m just so <em>happy</em>,” he cried and embraced her tightly.</p><p>“I’m happy too, Quincey,” she laughed and patted his back. “You helped make our day perfect. Thank you so much.”</p><p>This was apparently the wrong thing to say, as the blonde man began crying harder. Poppy peeked up at Tora, who rolled his eyes and grumbled under his breath. She giggled.</p><p>Finally, the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. Tora practically ran out into the hall while Poppy worked to disentangle herself from Quincey. The three of them filed out of the elevator; Jonathan wrapped one arm around his boyfriend’s back and maneuvered him toward their room.</p><p>Poppy caught up with Tora, who was standing at the door of the honeymoon suite, fiddling with the key card. Poppy shot a glance over her shoulder at the two blondes down the hall; a sleepy looking older man was walking toward the ice machine when Quincey called out to him.</p><p>“Hey! <em>Hey! </em>It’s their wedding night!” he hollered at the hotel guest and jabbed his finger in Tora and Poppy’s direction. “Don’t you dare disturb them!”</p><p>Jonathan attempted to shush Quincey and apologized to the passing man while simultaneously trying to open their door.</p><p>“I-I won’t,” the guest stuttered as he continued toward the end of the hall.</p><p>Tora chuckled under his breath and swung the door open. Poppy helped him pull the cart into the room and once it was unloaded of gifts, they rolled it out into the hall as they were instructed by the hotel clerk.</p><p>Once he made sure all the locks on the door were secured, Tora let out a jaw-cracking yawn and began stripping out of his clothes. “Never thought I’d say this, but I think I’m too tired for sex, Bobby,” he murmured as he slid his large body across the king-size bed.</p><p>Poppy laughed. “Don’t fall asleep just yet, mister. I need your help unzipping my dress.”</p><p>She padded over to the side of the bed and watched in the mirror as Tora fumbled with the zipper without looking up. The dress puddled at her feet and she stepped out of it. As she was preparing to slide under the covers with him, a thought nagged at her tired brain.</p><p>“Oh! We need to open Elisabeth’s gift before we go to bed. Remember? She said so,” Poppy said and bent over the pile of gifts; she smiled as she spotted Elisabeth’s easily: it was wrapped in tie-dye rainbow paper.</p><p>Tora dragged himself up into a sitting position in the bed and leaned his head against her shoulder as she set the gift down on her lap. Together they pulled the decorative paper away to reveal a large, fluffy blanket covered in a print of poppy flowers and tiger lilies.</p><p>“Oh my gosh,” Poppy breathed as her eyes ran over the soft, fleece garden in her hands. “I think… I think she <em>painted</em> this.”</p><p>It definitely looked like her friend’s art style, anyway.</p><p>“What’s the card say?” he yawned.</p><p>Poppy smiled over at Tora and spread their new blanket over him. She tucked it under his chin and he smirked at her.</p><p>Poppy tugged the blanket over herself and opened Elisabeth’s handmade card.</p><p>“Dear Tora and Poppy,” she read aloud. She felt Tora’s head grow heavier against the curve of her shoulder. “I know you already have plenty of art for your walls, so here’s some art for a horizontal place. And then she drew a little winky face,” Poppy giggled.</p><p>Tora chuckled sleepily.</p><p>“Congratulations on your wedding and marriage,” Poppy continued. “I’m so glad I got to celebrate such a wonderful day with you. While the big, fun things are certainly memorable and happy, it’s the seemingly small moments in the years to come that are worth treasuring just as much. Here’s a little gift to remind you to always make time for cuddles and just sitting together. Never miss an opportunity to hold hands and be close.”</p><p>“Love, Elisabeth.” Poppy sniffled as she finished reading her friend’s card. “Wow. She’s so sweet. Wasn’t that such a nic-“</p><p>Poppy angled her head to look down at Tora’s face; he was fast asleep.</p><p>Poppy smiled as she set the card on the nightstand and clicked the lamp off. She lowered herself onto one arm and leaned over to press a kiss to her husband’s forehead.</p><p>“I love you,” she whispered. “Good night, Tora.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>**SPOILERS**</p><p>The biggest, loudest thank you EVER goes to my best friend Gaby for surprising me with the art of bridal Poppy. I can't tell you how hard I cried when she sent it to me! She's always been my rock, my biggest cheerleader and now, she's one of my favorite artists as well. &lt;3</p><p>I also wanted to credit BegoniaRex for the idea of the blanket her character gifts to Poppy and Tora and for writing the message in the card herself. She told me she always gives blankets as wedding gifts and writes something similar to each couple. It's such a sweet, thoughtful gift and I'm grateful that she allowed me to include it here :)</p><p>Also, the moment where Tora rips off Poppy's veil is inspired by BegoniaRex's same experience at her own wedding 😂😂</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Adventure - Part One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora go on their honeymoon. </p><p>Told from Poppy and Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi guys! You may have noticed that I changed the title of this work to "Stages: A Series of Short Stories" because as it turns out 1) I am a liar LOL and 2) I am completely incapable of condensing all of these stories into one chapter each. There's still just too much left to say, so I hope you don't mind ;) </p><p>With that being said, I have several of you to thank for requesting Tora and Poppy's honeymoon:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Jlowery13, TifaEsque, Spotlightgirlontherun and Mackgurl2020. </p><p>A special thank you and shout out goes to BegoniaRex and my best friend Gaby for beta reading, and being so incredibly supportive. They're so great at helping me when I'm stuck and filling in certain gaps. These stories would not be what they are without them!</p><p>I hope you enjoy the first part of Poppy and Tora's first big trip away together! It brings me so much joy to continue writing these stories for you &lt;3</p><p>Love you all and see you soon,</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p> All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Never used to get excited<br/>
To sit here in the silence<br/>
Holding on to something<br/>
The way I'm holding you<br/>
Didn't used to know how fast time<br/>
Walks and runs and flies by<br/>
I never thought I'd feel so deeply, but damn I do”</p><p>-Ben Rector, “A Love Like This”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Poppy</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Are you <em>sure </em>you packed everything? Toothbrushes, phone chargers, s<em>everal </em>pairs of underwear? However many you think you need, double it. You can never have enough when you’re away from home, honey. Oh, how about-“</p><p>Poppy sighed as she tucked her cell phone between her shoulder and neck to free up her hand. It was way too early for an interrogation; the sun wasn’t even peeking through the patio door yet. “Yes, Quincey, we have everything. I checked our bags and my list twice. Just call me Santa Claus.”</p><p>Quincey chuckled in her ear. “Well, red is certainly your color, Miss Wifey. Oh! Speaking of red, you’re not bringing your mean little editor pen, are you? Remember, this trip is no work and all play.”</p><p>“I didn’t pack the pen, per your and Tora’s orders,” she promised, leaving out the part that Tora had hidden her work supplies and refused to tell her where they were until <em>after </em>they returned home.</p><p>“What about the drawing?” Quincey asked in a half-whisper as Tora sauntered down the stairs with a large, black duffel bag slung over his shoulder.</p><p>“Packed it,” she said, meeting Tora’s gaze.</p><p>His eyebrows knitted together as he quietly asked, <em>“Lemme guess, Quincey?”</em></p><p>Poppy nodded as her brother in law continued to ramble in her ear. Tora rolled his eyes, but she saw his mouth tug up at the corner. Tora stepped in front of her and gave her a quick kiss; the sweet aftertaste of his breath lingered on her lips.</p><p><em>“You taste good,” </em>she mouthed to him. <em>“Did you try the new strawberry oatmeal I bought?”</em></p><p>Tora smiled. <em>“Yeah. Fuckin’ delicious,” </em>he mouthed back.</p><p>Good. She’d bought it just for him and she hoped he’d like it.</p><p>
  <em>“But you taste better.”</em>
</p><p>Poppy bit her lip; heat rose in her cheeks and then she snapped her head up as Quincey shrieked in her ear.</p><p>“<em>Wifey!</em> Are you there? Are you even listening to me?”</p><p>“Um yeah, Quincey, sorry. I’m here. W-what did you say?”</p><p>Quincey huffed. “I <em>said </em>don’t forget to bring me with you!”</p><p>Poppy groaned internally at his mention of Quincey’s cardstock head on a stick he insisted they take with them on their honeymoon. He’d presented it to them the day before when they’d met halfway to drop Callum off.</p><p>“Isn’t he handsome?” Quincey asked as he’d held it up beside his cheek, curling his mouth up into a giant grin that matched the one on the paper head. “You can stick it in the sand and it’ll look like you buried me!”</p><p>“Gonna shove that stick right up his ass,” Tora had grumbled.</p><p>Poppy didn’t have the heart or patience to tell Quincey that Tora had thrown it out the moment they’d gotten home.</p><p>“Got it,” she told him. “It’s in my bag.” She’d figure out what to tell him when they got back.</p><p>“Good. Now, what were the three things I asked you to take pictures of for me in Fiji?”</p><p>“Quincey, we’ve been over this a million times…”</p><p>“Poppy, please!”</p><p>She sighed and ticked them off on her fingers. “The sleeping giant, the Wainuta Falls and Tora wearing a flower crown.”</p><p>Quincey squealed with laughter and hearing his name fall from Poppy’s lips, Tora frowned. <em>“Not on his life,” </em>he mouthed and grabbed the extended handle of her luggage: a pink, vertical bag shaped like a milk carton with the words <strong><em>Strawberry Milk </em></strong>written across it in large, bubble letters. <em>“Gonna take this down to the car if ya done with it.”</em></p><p>Poppy waved her hand at Tora. <em>“It’s fine, I can get it.”</em></p><p><em>“Since when have I ever let ya carry yer own shit?” </em>Tora smirked and headed toward the front door, rolling her pink bag behind him.</p><p>“Poppylan, did you hear me?”</p><p>“What’s that, Quincey? Sorry, we’re just trying to head out the door.”</p><p>“Did you pack the Christmas gift? You know, the one from a couple of years ago?” Quincey asked. The tone of his words bordered on mischievous and Poppy blushed as she realized what he meant.</p><p>“Um, <em>yes</em>!” she squeaked.</p><p>“Are you sure? You know you tend to forget things when you’re flustered.”</p><p>“I… I do not!”</p><p>“Just go check your dresser drawer one more time, honey. For peace of mind.”</p><p>“My mind is fine, Quincey.”</p><p>“Not yours, honey. <em>Mine.</em>”</p><p>“Fine,” she grit out as she ascended the carpeted stairs. “But I’m only doing this to prove you wrong. And because you’re watching Cal while we’re away.”</p><p>“Sure, sure, Wifey. Whatever you say.”</p><p>Poppy breezed into the bedroom and rounded their bed to the tall, gray dresser. She opened the third drawer from the bottom and sucked in a breath as the pile of pink fabric peeked out at her from the back.</p><p>
  <em>Fudge. </em>
</p><p>“Well? Did you pack it?” Quincey asked.</p><p>“Um… yup.”</p><p>“Ha! I <em>knew</em> you didn’t! Hurry up and throw it in your bag.”</p><p>“Tora took my bag out to the car,” she replied as she pulled out the pile of lace.</p><p>“Well, shove it in your shirt and sneak it into your bag when he’s not looking!”</p><p>“Quincey, he’s<em> always</em> looking.”</p><p>“I know, he’s such a creep. Take advantage of that! Distract him with your feminine wiles. Or your bottom. The man is a sucker for your curves and you know it.”</p><p>Poppy sighed and shoved the pink garment down her top. “I’ll figure something out.”</p><p>“That’s my girl. Honestly, what would you do without me?”</p><p>---</p><p>After making sure all the windows were locked and all the appliances in the apartment were off, Poppy stepped out into the hall and locked the front door behind her.</p><p>As she stepped out into the parking lot, she pondered how she was going to slip this stupid thing into her bag without Tora noticing. She knew the second she mentioned she needed to retrieve her luggage from the trunk, he’d be right there to help.</p><p>Poppy turned Quincey’s words over and over in her mind.</p><p>
  <em>Feminine wiles. Bottom. Curves.</em>
</p><p>Poppy clutched at the pink lace hidden beneath her blouse, her fingers gently skimming across the soft folds of her belly. Since their wedding four months ago, she’d packed on a couple of extra pounds.</p><p><em>“It’s normal,” </em>her granny had said on the phone a week ago. <em>“You’re in love, you’re married and you’re comfortable. You’re happy, baby girl.”</em></p><p>Though her grandmother’s words encouraged her slightly and Tora had never made her feel anything less than desired, she wanted to lose the weight. She was sick of feeling bloated and tired. When they got back from their honeymoon, she’d start joining Tora on his trips to the gym.</p><p>
  <em>Bottom, curves, take a seat. Leave it to Wile E Hamster.</em>
</p><p>With a plan in place, Poppy slid into the passenger seat beside Tora.</p><p>He smiled at her and shifted the car into reverse. “Ready, Bobby?”</p><p>“Yup,” she said and as she angled the seatbelt across her chest, she gasped. “Oh, shoot! Did we pack the new camera? I wanted to take some pictures with it.”</p><p>Tora slid the Subaru back into park. “I didn’t pack it.”</p><p>“I can’t remember if I grabbed it. Would you mind running upstairs and checking for me?”</p><p>“Why don’tcha check your bag again real quick? I’ll pop the trunk.”</p><p>
  <em>Shoot.</em>
</p><p>“Um, I will. But would you please just go check the bedroom? Maybe do a quick sweep for anything else we might’ve forgotten?”</p><p>Tora looked over at her, his eyes serious. “Sure. But ya gotta do the face.”</p><p>Poppy huffed. “Tora, we really don’t have time for this…”</p><p>He continued staring at her and crossed his big arms over his chest.</p><p>Poppy rolled her eyes. “Okay, fine, fine.” She pushed out a sigh and then closed her mouth, forcing air up and behind her upper lip so the skin ballooned away from her top row of teeth. She cocked her head to the left and crossed her eyes so they focused on her nose. She’d always thought of it as her “Cindy Lou Who” face, but Tora referred to it as her “Hungry Hungry Hamster” face.</p><p>Regardless of what it was called, the face always worked.</p><p>Tora barked out a laugh as he pulled the keys from the ignition. “Deal’s a deal, Bobby. Be right back.” He swung his long legs out of the car and retreated into the building.</p><p>As soon as she lost sight of him, Poppy lurched across the console to the driver’s side of the car and pressed the button to pop the trunk. She hopped out and raced to the back of the car. She yanked out her strawberry milk bag and quickly stuffed the pink garment under her other layers of clothes. Once it was hidden, she let out a relieved sigh.</p><p>It wasn’t every day you outsmarted a tiger.</p><p>Poppy remained bent over the luggage and sifted through her belongings; might as well do another thorough check while she was waiting for Tora. Phone charger, birth control pills, the drawing safely tucked away in its own pocket and the new digital camera, right where she knew it would be.</p><p>Suddenly, Poppy felt a large hand squeezing her bottom and she let out a shriek. She hadn’t even heard her husband come back outside.</p><p>“Find it?” he asked, his hand still lingering on her.</p><p>“Y-yes.”</p><p>“Good. Poppylan?”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“Ya gotta great ass.”</p><p>“Pfft, more like a great <em>big </em>ass,” she joked as she turned around to face him. “These days, I feel like the earth moves under my feet every time I take a step. ‘Earthquake Struck in Bōken Today.’”</p><p>Tora shook his head at her and leaned in to give her a kiss. “’One Man Survives Earthquake,’” he told her and she swatted at him playfully.</p><p>“’Is Fuckin’ Happiest He’s Ever Been.’”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Tora</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>Airports were bullshit.</p><p>It wasn’t like Tora had never flown and didn’t know what to expect; he’d accompanied Quincey on several work trips out of the country before. It was one thing to walk through a busy airport with his tall, broad brother, but it was something else entirely to navigate one while holding the hand of a five foot nothing woman.</p><p>It’d been a long time since he’d felt the need to pull on his mafia mask; apparently all it took was one honeymoon that required air travel for it to slide effortlessly back over his face. The moment a man who was texting while walking slammed into Poppy’s shoulder, Tora could feel his chest tighten and his facial features droop, from his eyebrows to the corners of his lips. The guy took one look at Tora’s mug and muttered a quick “Sorry” before scuttling away.</p><p>
  <em>Fucking idiots.</em>
</p><p>Once he’d made sure Poppy was okay, Tora sighed and pressed on toward their gate, keeping the mask fixed firmly over his face. Just as he’d expected, it came in handy for creating wide berths around him and his tiny wife as he tugged her through the crowd.</p><p>
  <em>That’s right. Just stay away from us.</em>
</p><p>As if the “random” full body pat down security screening he’d been forced to endure wasn’t bad enough.</p><p>He knew it, he fucking <em>knew </em>it, as soon as he saw the TSA agent’s eyes lock onto the brand on his neck that he was going to get pulled aside. Thanks to the mafia trials being broadcast nationwide, his name was more than likely an instant trigger for a thorough security check.</p><p>Standing there, arms and legs spread wide while he was being patted down by another man, reminded him a little too much of being in prison; he could feel his jaw clenching harder with every sweep of the agent’s hands over him.</p><p>Even worse was that Poppy had watched from the other side of the security checkpoint, a frown on her face the entire time. It was taking so long that she signaled to him she was going to use the restroom while they waited.</p><p>Fuck, it was so awkward and embarrassing. Tora knew he wasn’t a threat, but people never stopped viewing him as one.</p><p>Maybe they never would.</p><p>When she came back, the TSA agent decided to rifle through his carry on bag. He’d wanted to object so badly, but he knew arguing would only prolong this shit stain of a situation.</p><p>When the security officer opened his bag, he was immediately greeted with the wrinkled cardstock head of Quincey on a wooden paint stick.</p><p>The agent pulled it out and held it up. “The hell?” he muttered.</p><p>From just beyond the security checkpoint, Tora heard Poppy’s loud snort of laughter and then saw her clap both of her hands over her mouth. His own mouth tugged up at the corners.</p><p>He’d wanted to surprise her with it when they got to Fiji; he’d felt bad for impulsively throwing Quincey’s stupid head in the trash. The annoying little shit had paid for their trip, after all, so what was the harm in making sure he was in a couple of pictures? Tora had plucked it from the garbage the night before and shoved it into his bag when she wasn’t looking.</p><p>It hadn’t been the setting he’d hoped for, but her reaction at seeing it was priceless.</p><p>“Inside joke. S’my brother,” Tora told the agent, trying to keep his voice from shaking with laughter. “Don’t tell me I need a ticket for him, too.”</p><p>For the first time since the encounter, the TSA agent looked up and met Tora’s eyes. “Pfft, nah, he’s fine,” he told him and set Quincey off to the side so he could finish sorting through the rest of the bag.</p><p>Once Tora received the all clear to walk out into the airport, he slipped on his shoes, hefted his bag over his shoulder and made a beeline toward Poppy.</p><p>
  <em>No more hang ups. </em>
</p><p>This was their first big trip away together.</p><p>It had to be perfect.</p><p>As he approached his wife, she broke out into a large smile. “You brought Quincey,” she said.</p><p>Tora returned her smile and shrugged. “Felt bad for tossin’ our benefactor out on his ass.”</p><p>Poppy giggled and then turned her back to pluck something off a bench behind her. When she turned around, she was gripping a straw and a plastic to go cup filled to the brim with strawberry juice.</p><p>“Um, I know that was probably annoying and… awkward for you, so I thought something sweet might cheer you up.”</p><p>Hmmpf. How did she just always… know?</p><p>Tora accepted the cup and straw from her and slung an arm around her shoulder. He planted a kiss on top of her head. “It does. Thanks, kid.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Whaddya mean, <em>our seats aren’t together</em>?” Tora asked the flight attendant as calmly as he knew how. When he’d contacted Quincey’s travel agent, he’d been clear on booking two seats together and at least one had to have extra legroom for his six foot three frame.</p><p>“Well sir, it’s possible that the travel agency you booked your tickets through made an error,” the young, blonde woman told him in a low voice.</p><p>Tora sucked in a deep breath through his teeth, prepared to say more, but Poppy’s tiny hand on his arm stopped him. “It’s fine, Tora,” she said and smiled up at him. “We’re all going to the same place. Besides, it makes more sense for her to have that seat; it’s at the front of the plane and it’ll be easier for her to get out when we land.”</p><p>Tora stole a look over at the passenger who was sitting in what should have been Poppy’s seat; she was elderly, had salt-colored hair and large glasses. She was wearing a floral shirt under a pink sweater. Leaning against the chair in front of her was a dark wooden cane.</p><p>If he squinted, she almost looked like the dad in that movie Poppy forced him to watch; the one where he cross dressed to be near his kids. Fucking weird.</p><p>The attendant directed her gaze toward Poppy and smiled, clearly more content dealing with a patient little woman than a large, angry man. “Thank you, miss. If you’ll follow me, I’ll help you find your seat.”</p><p>Poppy squeezed past him to trail after the attendant. She glanced back at him over her shoulder and smiled. <em>“It’s fine” </em>she mouthed and blew him a kiss as she moved further down the aisle.</p><p>Like hell it was fine. He just needed one thing to go right. Just <em>one.</em></p><p>
  <em>This was his fault. </em>
</p><p>Why the fuck didn’t he think to check the seat numbers on the tickets? Like a dumbass, he’d plucked them out of the mailbox, made sure there were two for Tora and Poppylan Murakami and gone about the rest of his day.</p><p>The few times he traveled with Quincey, his brother booked their flights through the same agency and it had always gone smoothly. Tora didn’t think he had any reason to doubt them. One of the few times he’d let his guard down in his life, expecting someone to do what they were supposed to and it’d blown up in his face.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck.</em>
</p><p>Tora watched the attendant lead Poppy five rows back and point her to a middle seat next to a handsome younger man with dark hair that swooped high off his head, thickly arched eyebrows and chunky, black rounded glasses. He looked up from his book and smiled in acknowledgment of Poppy before shuffling his things around so she could get comfortable.</p><p>Once she sat down, Poppy turned to face the young man. He reached his hand out to shake hers and said something that made her laugh.</p><p>Tora frowned.</p><p>
  <em>Great.</em>
</p><p>He shook his head and let out a heavy sigh as he hefted his luggage into the overhead bin.</p><p>“Young man?”</p><p>Tora glared down at the older woman he’d be trapped next to for six hours.</p><p>“You need me to stand up so you can get to your seat?” She was already reaching for her cane.</p><p>He sighed again. “Nah, I can get across. You’re good where yer at.”</p><p>---</p><p>For the next four hours, Tora did everything he could to preoccupy himself. Took a nap, played some stupid game on his phone. Got up to use the restroom. Flipped through the in-flight catalogue a couple of times, put it back. Looked out his window at the clouds.</p><p>Glanced back occasionally to where Poppy sat with her new friend. He regretted it every time; they were always talking very animatedly to each other, laughing and waving their hands around.</p><p>Tora tried not to torture himself with thoughts of what <em>he </em>would be doing if he was the one sitting next to her. Sleeping on her shoulder, teasing her, making her laugh, playing that weird cootie snatcher game she’d made with a folded-up piece of paper.</p><p>Pinching her cheeks. Letting her braid his hair. Scrolling through wedding photos on their phones. Flustering her and stealing kisses under a blanket…</p><p>Tora huffed and shifted around in his seat.</p><p>
  <em>Only two more hours. </em>
</p><p>He leaned his head back in his seat and tried to fall asleep again. Just as he could feel himself drifting off, the plane began to jostle around him. Above his head, the seatbelt sign lit up and the pilot’s voice sounded over the intercom.</p><p>
  <em>“Looks like we’ve hit some mild turbulence, folks. It’s just a few bumps, nothing to worry about, but please remain seated until we clear the air pockets.”</em>
</p><p>Immediately Tora looked over his right shoulder to check on Poppy. She wasn’t laughing, her eyes looked a little wide and panicked, but she was still talking to the man beside her.</p><p><em>Christ</em>, he wanted to be there for her.</p><p>Tora turned back around in his seat and out of the corner of his eye, he caught sight of the old woman’s hand clutched firmly around the armrest. His eyes flickered to her face: her jaw was clenched tight and her mouth was set in a firm line. She was breathing hard.</p><p>“Hey, um…” he began and gestured toward her with one hand, silently requesting her name.</p><p>The woman’s eyes glanced over at him. “N-Nora,” she breathed. </p><p>“Heh. <em>Tora</em>,” he chuckled and motioned to himself. “Ya okay?”</p><p>“I will be once this shit lets up,” Nora replied. “I hate flying. Never been very good at it.”</p><p>Tora barked out a laugh. Fuck, if he didn’t know any better, he’d think he was sitting next to Alice. “S’okay,” he shrugged. “We’re all bad at somethin’. If you hate it so much, what the hell are you doing up here?”</p><p>“I’m going to visit my son and grandkids in Thailand,” she told him. He noticed her shoulders were not quite as close to her ears now; she’d lowered them significantly since they’d started talking.</p><p>“Oh yeah? How many grandkids ya got?”</p><p>“Two,” she said and smiled. “A boy and a girl.”</p><p>“How old are they? They shorter than my wife?”</p><p>As he continued to speak with Nora, he noticed the woman’s body gradually relax in degrees as she told him about her family. She’d been married to the same man for fifty five years before he died. Stroke. Three kids. Two lived near her in Tokyo and one in Thailand. “Since my husband passed, it’s just me. My son said they’d fly out to see me, but I told his ass to stay put. I wanted to travel,” she told him.</p><p>“This’ll be my final flight; my doctor said he wouldn’t approve me to fly again after this because of my health and age. I say you’re only as old as you feel and I feel pretty fucking good,” she chuckled and settled back into her seat. “I just wanted one last big adventure and no one was going to stop me. Spent too much of my life afraid.”</p><p>Tora let the weight of her words sink into him. Yeah, he knew that shit all too well.</p><p>“S’like I told ya, Nora,” he finally said. “You’re good where yer at.”</p><p>A moment later the plane settled around them and the pilot turned off the seatbelt sign. Nora looked over at him.</p><p>“I know what you were doing just now,” she said, gesturing to the space around them. “Keeping me talking. Thanks, kid.”</p><p>Hearing one of his terms of endearment for Poppy leave the old woman’s mouth made him grin; had anyone ever called <em>him </em>that before?</p><p>“Welcome.”</p><p>---</p><p>Tora chatted easily with Nora for the next two hours.</p><p>Not only was she open and friendly, but she was no stranger to cursing, which immediately made him feel more at ease. He didn’t hold back as he told her all about his “pain in the ass little brother” and flying to Fiji for his honeymoon with his “gorgeous, goofy little shit of a wife.”</p><p>They joked and asked each other questions as they each shared family photos on their cell phones. The last photo she took of her husband, a picture at Christmas last year when the whole family had been able to get together. Her cat, Weenie. Her son and his wife, countless images of her grandkids.</p><p>The first selfie he and Poppy had taken together. Pictures of Callum. A photo of him, Poppy and Quincey in their Christmas sweaters a couple of years ago. A picture of Poppy making the “Hungry Hungry Hamster” face. Countless images from their wedding: Gyu and Mirabelle with the garter and bouquet, Danae and her boyfriend Matt. Poppy, Tora, Eleanor and Alice standing in front of the ocean.</p><p>Aside from Poppylan, Tora couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt comfortable speaking with a complete stranger. It felt so <em>good, </em>being able to openly share and brag about parts of his life without worrying that he was putting a target on the things and people he loved most.</p><p>He was also grateful that he didn’t intimidate Nora with his tattoos, the abnormal color of his eyes, his large frame and his ear plugs. She was tough, had obviously seen some shit in her life and saw someone like him not as a threat, but a confidant.</p><p>It was a role Tora did not take for granted.</p><p>Before long, the seatbelt sign was lighting up as the pilot announced the beginning of their descent into Thailand. Fear colored Nora’s eyes and she visibly stiffened in her seat as the plane bumped and shook as they prepared to land.</p><p>When her withered hand latched onto the armrest, Tora tapped her on the shoulder and offered his hand out to her, palm up. She accepted it gratefully and gripped it with a surprising amount of strength.</p><p>Tora sucked in a deep breath and willed himself not to look back at his wife. There was nothing he could do for her; he was trapped, buckled into this seat. He could only hope that if Poppy was experiencing the same panic Nora was, the young man sitting beside her was reaching out and holding her hand, too.</p><p>“Hey,” Tora murmured as the ground came closer into view. Nora whipped her head to look at him.</p><p>“You’re good where yer at.”</p><p>The old woman smiled and gave his hand a squeeze.</p><p>---</p><p>When the plane landed and they began the process of deboarding, Tora slid himself in front of Nora. He planted his large body in the aisle, blocking anyone who might try to get past her before she was ready. He reached into the overhead bin and grabbed his luggage, then gazed down at her.</p><p>“What’s ya bag look like?” he asked.</p><p>“It’s got a bunch of stupid bright flowers on it,” she told him. “Can’t miss it.”</p><p>Tora chuckled and spotted it easily; it looked like some shit Poppy would own. Once he adjusted their luggage over his shoulder, he reached down and helped Nora up from her seat. An irritated sigh erupted in the air behind him and all it took was one cold stare over his shoulder for the impatient man to take a step back.</p><p>Tora’s gaze flicked to where Poppy stood in the aisle and smiled as he saw her seat partner pulling down her luggage for her.</p><p>
  <em>Good. </em>
</p><p>Assured that his wife was being taken care of, Tora moved in front of Nora and allowed her to step out into the aisle. He made sure her cane was securely in one hand before he grabbed her other one and led her out into the airport.</p><p>“Ya gotta go to baggage claim or anything?” he asked Nora as they waited for Poppy in the terminal.</p><p>“Nope. I just have the one bag. Could use a damn drink, though,” the old woman told him.</p><p>Tora smirked. “Christ, woman, it’s barely noon.”</p><p>Nora swatted playfully at his arm. “Respect your elders and mind your business.”</p><p>When Poppy finally came into view, she was clutching onto her seat partner’s bag as he helped her navigate through the crowd. They came to a stop a few feet in front of Tora and she reached up to hug the young man goodbye. He said something that made her giggle and then he waved as he headed down the opposite direction of the terminal.</p><p>Poppy practically bounced over to Tora, her strawberry milk bag rolling noisily behind her. “Hi, handsome!” she beamed up at him and took his hand in hers. “Long time, no see. How was your flight?”</p><p>“Not too bad, in the end.” Poppy’s gaze fell on the older woman standing next to him. “Bobby, this is Nora. Sat next to her on the plane. Nora, this is-“</p><p>“Ah, so <em>this </em>is the little hamster,” Nora said and flashed a smile at Poppy, revealing a line of perfectly white dentures. “Nice to meet you. Big guy here wouldn’t shut up about you.”</p><p>Poppy’s eyes widened in surprise and she laughed. “It’s nice to meet you, Nora,” she said and shook her hand.</p><p>“Who was your friend, sweetheart?” Tora asked and nodded his head in the direction of where her seat mate wandered off.</p><p>“Oh my gosh, you won’t believe it, Tora! So his name is Dan and he works in photography, like fashion,” she babbled. “He was reading a book when I sat down and it was one of Quin- er, Q.B. Noyouko’s! It was the pirate love story. I told him that I edited the book and the author was my brother in law. Then he asked me to <em>sign </em>the inside cover! Like an autograph! It was so cool.”</p><p>Tora grinned down at his wife. “Pfft. So the hamster’s famous. Sure ya don’t wanna go runnin’ off with him?”</p><p>She smirked. “Well, I asked him to elope with me but he said he couldn’t; he was meeting his husband here in Thailand.”</p><p>Tora snorted. Feisty little shit. He opened his mouth to tease her some more but Nora’s voice cut through the air. “Good God, enough flirting, you two. It was only six hours! Now are you joining me for a drink or not?”</p><p>Poppy nodded in agreement and Tora shrugged. “Sure,” he said, “we gotta two hour layover.”</p><p>After having lunch and drinks at a small airport bar that Nora insisted on paying for, they joined her on her reserved airport golf cart and assisted her in hailing a cab outside.</p><p>While Poppy hugged the old woman goodbye and helped her get settled in the backseat, Tora loaded her bag into the trunk. He stalked up to the driver side window and handed the driver a large, crisp bill. “Ya make sure she gets to wherever she needs to go, <em>safely,</em>” he told him. “This is for the fare. Whatever’s leftover is yours.”</p><p>The man’s eyes widened as he accepted the bill with a trembling hand. “Th-thank you, sir. The lady will be taken care of, I promise.”</p><p>Tora nodded once and rounded the car to stand in front of the open mouth of the backseat. He pulled out his phone. “What’s yer number?” he asked Nora. “I want ya to text me when you make it to your son’s house.”</p><p>Nora chuckled. “If you wanted my number, all you had to do was-“</p><p>Tora smirked down at her. “Pfft, ya couldn’t handle me,” he said. “Now gimme your number.”</p><p>“Oh, for Christ sakes, it’s only ten minutes from here…”</p><p>“Number. <em>Now.</em>”</p><p>The old woman sighed and rattled it off for him. He sent a quick text to it and then heard a ringtone go off in her bag. Satisfied, he tucked his phone in his front pocket.</p><p>Nora hooked a thumb at him as she made eye contact with Poppy. “He always this bossy?”</p><p>Poppy giggled. “When it comes to the people he cares about… yes. Yes, he is.”</p><p>“You got a good one here, Hamster. Make sure he stays that way.”</p><p>Tora snorted and reached out to shake her hand. “Take care, Nora.”</p><p>“What, too good to lower your tall ass down here and give me a hug?”</p><p>“Feisty little women, surrounded by ‘em, swear to God,” he grumbled as he leaned down into the car. She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a tight squeeze.</p><p>“Thank you,” she said quietly. “I mean it. Thanks for everything.”</p><p>“Anytime,” he told her.</p><p>They broke apart and as Tora watched the cab disappear down the street, Poppy looked up at him with a gleam in her eye.</p><p>“What?” he asked and wound an arm around her shoulders.</p><p>“Sure you don’t wanna go running off with her?” she teased.</p><p>“I asked her. Said I was too polite. She likes those bad boy types. Ya know, the ones who are all scary lookin’ and shit.”</p><p>A laugh blew past Poppy’s mouth. “Yeah. You can’t really be a bad boy when you and your dog have matching sweaters.”</p><p>---</p><p>Tora couldn’t remember ever being this happy to board an airplane.</p><p>They had a twelve hour flight ahead of them but this time, his seat was next to his wife’s.</p><p>He took great pride in setting his luggage beside hers in the shared overhead bin and then making sure she was comfortable, covering her in the light pink fleece blanket she’d packed before he sat down next to her.</p><p>Once they were an hour into the air, Poppy suggested they play the alphabet game to pass the time.</p><p>“Thought ya played that in cars, Bobby.”</p><p>“Since when do you care about rules?” she asked and shot a smirk at him.</p><p>“Pfft. Fine. I’ll start.”</p><p>Tora’s eyes roamed across the cabin and eventually fell on a familiar face.</p><p>“Asshole,” he said and pointed at the man sitting a few rows ahead of them, the same man who had sighed impatiently behind him while Tora helped Nora out of her seat.</p><p>Poppy gaped at him. “That doesn’t count!”</p><p>“Trust me, sweetheart. It does.”</p><p>Poppy huffed. “You’re supposed to pick out objects. Like…” She looked around and then gestured at the panel of lights and buttons above their seats. “Button.”</p><p>“I got one for ya. Boring. That’s <em>boring.</em>”</p><p>Poppy lowered her finger to point at him. “Butthead.”</p><p>Tora grinned and slipped his hand beneath the blanket, seeking her hip. He grabbed it and her entire body jolted as she let out a squeal.</p><p>“Curvy.”</p><p>“Don’t!” Poppy shrieked as she squirmed under her seatbelt like she had a chance in hell of escaping him.</p><p>“My turn again?” he asked as he dropped a kiss on her shoulder.</p><p>“Let’s- let’s play something else,” she said.</p><p>They played tic tac toe on a sketchpad she’d brought, which eventually turned into a game of mad-libs and then hangman. Once Tora ran out of dirty words to use, they put the paper away, cuddled under the blanket together and selected a Pixar film to watch on the small tv nestled in the chair headrest in front of them.</p><p><em>This, </em>Tora thought as he glanced over at Poppy’s smiling face, illuminated by the bright colors of the movie, <em>this is the plane ride I wanted. </em></p><p>As Poppy fell asleep against him, her hamster cheek smooshed into his shoulder, he carefully lifted his phone from his pocket to check the time. He smiled as he tapped open the text message Nora had sent him a couple of hours prior.</p><p>
  <em>Made it to my son’s. It was nice meeting you and your little lady. Take good care of each other. Enjoy the honeymoon. Be careful! And if you’re not, be sure to name it after me! </em>
</p><p>Pfft. Fucking hell.</p><p>Eventually, dinner was served: beef, rice and veggies with bulgogi sauce and of course his wife requested a brownie for dessert. After they ate, they took turns going to the cramped plane bathrooms, where they changed into comfortable clothes to sleep in.</p><p>When Poppy returned to her seat wearing a sparkly purple sweatshirt with a shiny fabric unicorn horn dangling from the hood, Tora laughed.</p><p>“What?” she asked around a yawn. She slipped under the blanket and curled into his side.</p><p>“Yer goddamn cute,” he said and wrapped his long arms around her.</p><p>Poppy fell asleep quickly and eventually Tora managed to doze off. He awoke every now and then to the noises of other passengers shifting in their seats, the soft murmuring of flight attendants as they made midnight wellness checks throughout the cabin and the sound of his wife snoring gently beside his ear.</p><p>When he awoke for the final time, the seatbelt light clicked on and the voice of the pilot sounded over the intercom.</p><p>
  <em>Hi, folks. We’ve begun our descent procedure into Nadi Airport. We expect to land just a few minutes ahead of schedule. The… </em>
</p><p>When Tora peered out his window, all he could see was a vibrant expanse of green and blue.</p><p>“Bobby?” he murmured as he placed his hand on Poppy’s shoulder and rubbed it gently. He didn’t want her to be startled awake by the inevitable bumping and shaking of the airplane landing. “Bobby?”</p><p>“Mmm?” she stirred and sleepily blinked up at him.</p><p>“Mornin’, sweetheart,” he said and pressed a kiss to her forehead.</p><p>“We made it.”</p><p>
  
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>**SPOILERS**</p><p>A couple of quick notes:</p><p>1) Bōken is a fictional city that I imagine sits about two hours away from Narin City. It's where Tora and Poppy currently live in their one bedroom apartment.</p><p>2) The man Poppy sits next to on their first flight is absolutely, 110% a tribute to the adorable, comedic genius that is Dan Levy. If you haven't watched Schitt's Creek yet, what are you even doing?! :) </p><p>3) Thanks to BegoniaRex for the hilarious exchange about bad boys and Tora having a matching sweater with Callum because let's face it... at this point, he totally would.</p><p>4) Thanks to my best friend Gaby for the image at the end of this chapter. She's been doing digital art for less than a year and is such a PRO! I have so so much love for her my heart can barely contain it all.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Adventure - Part Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora go on their honeymoon. </p><p>Told from Poppy and Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi guys! </p><p>I'd like to preface this first by saying that I researched the SHIT out of Fiji online lol. From YouTube videos about the resort where Poppy and Tora stay to the actual menus of Fijian restaurants, etc. I'm talking hours went into studying Fiji to the point where I now want to vacation there myself. </p><p>But did you guys know that  PEOPLE CAN LIE ON THE INTERNET?? I had no idea LOL. Initially when I researched the Garden of the Sleeping Giant and the statue that was constructed there (shown in the art image at the bottom of my last update) the sculpture was depicted on Pinterest as well as several travel sites and blogs as being in Fiji. </p><p>Well, it's not LOL. It's actually located in a garden in the UK. Talk about frustrating, disappointing, etc. It was something I really wanted them to visit. Then I thought, you know what? I've never been to Fiji and while I tried my hardest to portray it accurately, some things may not be correct. I apologize for any discrepancies; I mean no disrespect to Fijians, those who have been to Fiji or know more about their culture. I'm writing a fictional story and had to rely on my own creative devices to fill in any gaps. So in a way, this is MY Fiji, as well as Tora and Poppy's. And in our Fiji, there is a damn living sculpture of a woman in the Garden of the Sleeping Giant LOL.</p><p>With that being said, I have several of you to thank for requesting Tora and Poppy's honeymoon:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Jlowery13, TifaEsque, Spotlightgirlontherun and Mackgurl2020.</p><p>A special thank you and shout out goes to BegoniaRex, who is my amazing beta reader, rock and good friend. This story would be far less rich without her.</p><p>I hope you enjoy this second part of our favorite couple's honeymoon! We're nearing the end of Stages; there will be 4-5 more updates and then I'll begin working on another beast-length fic. I. Can't. Wait.</p><p>Thank you all so much for reading! Your comments and support mean everything to me &lt;3</p><p>Love you all and see you soon, </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Out of thin air you appeared in my life<br/>
Like a burst of Technicolor in a world of black and white<br/>
When my heart was locked inside a box, you reached inside and now<br/>
I see my future when I look into your eyes”</p><p>-Ben Rector, “Extraordinary Magic”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>Apparently, when you take a hamster out of her cage, send her flying over the ocean and plop her down on a tropical island, she will bounce in the backseat of your taxi, puff out her cheeks in excitement and without taking a breath, she will chatter.</p><p>Non-stop.</p><p>Tora chuckled as Poppy continually whipped her head back and forth between looking at him and the rolling green hills outside of their car window. While he had always been one to quietly observe his surroundings and make mental comments to himself, Poppy was very much a person who had to declare all the things she was seeing and make sure everyone <em>else s</em>aw them too.</p><p>“Tora, look! Did you see that bird?” she asked as she angled her head to look straight up into the cloudless sky.</p><p>“Nah,” he said. He’d been too busy watching her in all of her enthusiasm. “What’d it look like?”</p><p>“It looked like a little finch, but not one that I’ve ever seen before! It was green and had a red face…”</p><p>“Sure it wasn’t just ya reflection, Bobby?” he smirked as he reached out and pinched her cheek between two fingers; her skin was a bright, shiny pink against his own olive complexion.</p><p>“<em>Ackk! </em>No!” she laughed as she swatted his hand away. “I don’t know what kind of bird it was… I’ll have to flip through my travel books again, it might tell me- Oh. My. Gosh. Tora, look at the <em>ocean!</em>”</p><p>Tora leaned into her, resting his chin on her shoulder as he gazed out the window at the line of lush palm trees that extended from the ground like long fingers, waggling at them in the wind.</p><p>At first he was unsure where her shock stemmed from; they’d both seen the ocean countless times back home. The moment the ocean surrounding the island of Viti Levu came into his view, he understood.</p><p>At Kintsugi Beach, the water was always dark, practically gray most days, resembling large storm clouds tumbling across the sand. The water here was <em>bright</em>, electric, so unreal looking that for a flash of a second, he worried it was all an illusion, a glitch in his vision. When he blinked and the same vibrant color remained, he smiled.</p><p>
  <em>Ten days. </em>
</p><p>They had ten days of <em>this.</em></p><p>“Somethin’ else, ain’t it?” he asked quietly, unable to tear his eyes away from the expanse of turquoise in front of him.</p><p>Poppy nodded in agreement, seemingly speechless for the first time since they’d stepped foot on the island. After a moment, Tora felt her perk up beside him.</p><p>“See those little buildings?” she asked as she pointed at a row of what looked like huts suspended over the water.</p><p>“Mmmhmm.”</p><p>“That’s where we’ll-“</p><p>Poppy was cut off by the sound of a loud <em>boom </em>reverberating through the car. An instinct long buried clawed its way to the surface of Tora as he threw himself over the top of his shrieking wife. The cab jumped and staggered a bit before the driver was able to pull it over onto the side of the road.</p><p>Tora sucked in a heavy breath as he caught sight of a shredded piece of tire on the asphalt behind them. Slowly his vision came back into focus and the reality of the situation washed over him.</p><p>
  <em>Tire blow out. Not gun fire.</em>
</p><p>Fucking Christ.</p><p>He retreated into the middle of the backseat and took Poppy’s wide-eyed face in his hands. “S’okay,” he breathed, trying to convince himself just as much as her. “Just a tire blowout. Ya good, kid?”</p><p>Poppy blinked several times and finally offered him a small smile. “Yeah, it just scared the crap out of me,” she said, one tiny hand grappling at her chest. Then she turned her attention to the front of the cab. “We’re okay, we’re fine. Are you okay? It’s not your fault, these things happen.”</p><p>It took Tora a moment to realize that their dark-haired cab driver, Adi was fully turned around in his seat, facing them. His bushy eyebrows were pulled together and words of concern dripped from his mouth.</p><p>“We’re fine,” he reassured the driver.</p><p>It wasn’t fine, though. Not really.</p><p>First the seat mix-up on their flight and now they had a broken-down taxi barely a mile out from their resort. Not to mention he’d probably scared Poppy more than the tire blow out had; throwing himself over her wasn’t just a reaction. It was an <em>overreaction,</em> something he would have had cause to do years ago. But not now.</p><p>Now they weren’t driving into the middle of a clan war zone. They were on a tropical island. For their honeymoon. It was supposed to be relaxing, fun. Sexy and romantic.</p><p>
  <em>Just take it easy. Be normal. </em>
</p><p>Seemingly convinced that they were okay, the driver exited the cab and circled around to the back, where Tora heard the click of the trunk pop open. Tora slipped out of the backseat and rounded the car to join Adi.</p><p>“Need help changin’ out the tire?” he asked.</p><p>Adi looked up at him for a moment and then sighed. “Thank you, but I’m going to have to call a tow. The spare tire is deflated and I have no way of airing it up. I can- uh, call another cab for you or ask the resort to send out a shuttle…”</p><p>Tora stared past Adi at the sloped roof of the Marriott’s main building in the distance. Not even a mile out; some of his more laidback jogs in the park covered at <em>least </em>three. They could do without a car. It would be nice to stretch his legs, anyway.</p><p>“Not a long walk. We’ll be fine, thanks,” Tora told him as he fished his wallet out of his back pocket and thumbed out a bill for the fare. He slung his duffel bag over his left shoulder and gripped Poppy’s bag in his right hand before striding over and opening the back door of the cab.</p><p>“C’mon, sweetheart,” he said and held out a hand to her. “This cab’s gone as far as it’s goin’ to.”</p><p>Poppy grasped his hand and hoisted herself out. “Are we walking?”</p><p>Tora shifted her strawberry milk bag around and slipped the straps over her arms. He turned and faced away from her, then squatted down, his arms out at his sides.</p><p>“I’m walkin’. You’re riding.”</p><p>“Riding?” she giggled behind him. “Tora, I can walk.”</p><p>“Nah, I’ll carry ya. S’more fun this way.”</p><p>He’d try to salvage as much of this day for her as he could.</p><p>“Plus you’ll block any birds from shittin’ on me.”</p><p>Christ, he could practically <em>hear </em>her cheeks puffing out in anger. “Ha. Ha. <em>So </em>glad you remembered to pack your sense of humor and-“</p><p>Tora chuckled over his shoulder at her. “Ya done, Bobby? C’mon, train’s leavin’.”</p><p>He heard a slight huff, then the sound of her bag jostling around on her back. He felt a slight tug backwards and suddenly she was straddling his ass, her legs desperately trying to wind around his waist as her hands scrabbled to grip his shoulders.</p><p>“Jesus, you’re bad at this,” he laughed as he steadied himself and gripped the back of her thighs to hoist her upwards.</p><p>“Oh, can it, you big thug,” she giggled as she situated herself against the middle of his back. “Not all of us are blessed with obscenely long legs.”</p><p>“Not the only thing ‘bout me that’s obscenely lo-“</p><p>“Oh my god, Tora!” she yelped and covered his mouth with one tiny palm. “Adi is <em>right there. </em>Now, forward. March. On the double, mister.”</p><p>She gently tapped his sides with her feet like he was a damn horse and he barked out a laugh. So fucking feisty.</p><p>Tora kept to the side of the road, carrying her under as much shade as he could. He smiled as Poppy tapped at his shoulders to point out a couple paddle boarding in the lagoon and a butterfly that fluttered past them.</p><p>Her exclamations were punctuated by the soft rustling of palm fronds and mangrove leaves above their heads. He sighed deeply and the smell of saltwater and beach barbeque settled pleasantly in his lungs.</p><p><em>Fuck, </em>he already liked it here.</p><p>As Tora rounded the curb that would bring them to the resort entrance, they were met with the sight of a row of small, rickety stands perched along the edge of the property. Colorful, handwritten signs advertised local produce, clothing and accessories.</p><p>“Oh,” Tora heard Poppy sigh as they passed a jewelry vendor.</p><p>“Wanna take a look?” he asked her as he came to a stop. He already knew the answer.</p><p>Poppy slid off his back and bounced up to the counter. An older woman with a red hibiscus flower tucked in her graying hair greeted her.</p><p>“Bula! Welcome!” she said and flashed Poppy a smile. “First time in Fiji?”</p><p>“Yes!” she squeaked and smiled back. “We just flew in from Narin. We’re on our honeymoon.” Poppy’s big eyes locked onto the flower in the woman’s hair. “I like your flower!”</p><p>“Thank you, little one! I picked them fresh from one of my hibiscus plants this morning. Would you and your husband like one?” the woman asked as she glanced up at Tora. “His hair was <em>made </em>for flowers.”</p><p>Tora snorted. “Sure.”</p><p>The woman rummaged under the splintered counter and pulled two red flowers from a small basket. She handed them to Poppy, who thanked her and immediately tucked one behind her ear. She spun around and gestured for Tora to lean down. He chuckled and lowered his head so Poppy could push the flower stem into his half bun.</p><p>“So,” Poppy said as she perused bins of jewelry on the far side of the counter, “do you make all of these yourself?” She inspected a colorful threaded bracelet before setting it back down and selecting another with a carved wooden charm dangling from it.</p><p>The older woman chuckled. “I do. I have since I was young. I make them out of driftwood, thread, pearls and coconut shells. Do you see anything you like?”</p><p>“Oooh, I love this one!” Poppy answered and lifted a dark bracelet from the box. It consisted of three strings of tiny buttons that were shaped and drilled from coconut shells.</p><p>Tora smiled softly at the piece of jewelry; it reminded him of Joe’s bracelet. “Ya want it, Bobby?”</p><p>Poppy blinked up at him, a large grin stretched across her face. “Really?”</p><p>“Pfft. ‘Course,” he said and retrieved a bill from his wallet. “Get whatever ya want.”</p><p>“We should probably get something for Quincey, too,” she said as she redirected her eyes to the pile of jewelry. She lifted out a thick ropey bracelet that was decorated with a small gray pearl bead. “Think he would like this?”</p><p>“Looks like somethin’ the princess would wear,” Tora told her and handed the vendor cash. She made change and then gestured for Poppy’s arm.</p><p>“Here, I’ll put it on you,” she said and strung the coconut shell bracelet around Poppy’s wrist. She had to wind it around several times before she could fasten the button through the cotton loop. “So tiny!” the lady laughed and patted the top of his wife’s hand.</p><p>Tora smirked down at Poppy. She <em>was</em> tiny but filled with enough love and snark that she could take down the world.</p><p>“Vinaka, thank you, love birds!” the old woman said as they eventually waved goodbye and headed toward the resort entrance. “Enjoy the island!”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Poppy </em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Tora, look! There’s the swim up bar,” Poppy pointed from the back of the golf cart that was driving them to their overwater bungalow. She knew she must have said <em>“Tora, look!” </em>over a hundred times since they landed in Fiji, but she couldn’t <em>help</em> herself; she didn’t want him to miss a thing.</p><p>A large concrete canopy hovered over the full bar; rattan lanterns hung from the ceiling and swayed in the breeze. Wind-pushed waves gently lapped over submerged barstools and Poppy smiled, eager to sit there and order cocktails with her husband.</p><p>Tora chuckled and tucked a strand of her windblown hair behind her ear. “Wantin’ to start early?”</p><p>“No,” she laughed and poked a finger in his side. “Maybe after dinner. Or lunch. Or both.”</p><p>“Damn, Bobby. We’ll getcha a pair of floaties so ya don’t drown on your way back to the hut.”</p><p>“Who needs floaties when I can just ride on your back?”</p><p>Tora smirked. “Oh, you’ll be ridin’ me all r-“</p><p>“Oh my god!” she shrieked and clamped both of her hands over his mouth. Poppy shot a look at their driver, who seemed completely unaware of or unbothered by her husband’s comment. Tora’s shoulders shook with laughter as she turned to him and puffed out her cheeks.</p><p>“Down, boy,” she said as she removed her hands from his face. Poppy shook her head at him as he continued to laugh. He’d always had a perverted sense of humor, but it seemed there was something about being away on a tropical honeymoon with her that made him bolder, looser with his words, even around complete strangers.</p><p>Though she’d cut him off, she couldn’t deny that his forwardness was a turn on. She’d inconspicuously clenched her thighs together at the thought of riding him in their bungalow with the doors wide open, the sounds of the ocean drowning out their moans.</p><p>
  <em>There’s plenty of time for that, Pops. Ten whole days, in fact.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Down, girl.</em>
</p><p>The golf cart cruised to the end of the dark wood boardwalk and came to a stop in front of the last bungalow on the right.</p><p>“Here we are!” their driver, Emori, a tall, wiry man, said as he hopped out of the cart, his bright floral shirt flapping around him in the breeze. Emori rounded the vehicle to unload their bags and Tora slid out to help him. Poppy stepped out of the cart; she stretched her legs, her arms and arched her back as she basked in the sun.</p><p>Somehow the sun felt different here, like it belonged only to them; it was warmer, tropical, bouncing and reflecting almost white against the turquoise lagoon. Poppy leaned over the railing and her eyes widened as a flash of something dark blue sliced through the water below.</p><p>“Um, Emori?” Poppy said as he and Tora emerged from the bure. “Are there fish in the lagoon?”</p><p>“Io, yes, there are all sorts of fish that live in the lagoon,” he replied. “Don’t worry, they’re harmless and pretty easy to avoid because the water is so clear. I mean, it’s Fiji, right?” the man laughed.</p><p>Poppy smiled. “Right. I mean, we signed up with Coral Cats for snorkeling, so I guess it’s not much different than that.”</p><p>“Exactly, Miss Poppy.”</p><p>Emori took a moment to point out the beaches that surrounded the lagoon, as well as the swim up bar, the kayak and paddleboat rental shack and a couple of restaurants, one of which served breakfast all day.</p><p>“Well, I think that’s about it. Happy honeymooning and congratulations! Should you need anything, please don’t hesitate to ask for me at the main building where you checked in. I’ll be happy to help.”</p><p>They both thanked him and shook the Fijian man’s hand before he slipped back into the golf cart and zoomed down the boardwalk away from them.</p><p>Poppy felt her husband’s large hand wrap around hers. “Ready?” he asked, holding their bungalow key up by his head.</p><p>She gave his fingers a squeeze. “Ready.”</p><p>---</p><p>When Poppy walked inside their overwater bure, she gasped.</p><p>She’d seen pictures online as she perused through travel sites with Quincey, but they didn’t do the tropical cabins justice.</p><p>From the view of the road, the bungalows had seemed so small, dark dots suspended above the water. Upon entering Poppy saw that they were sprawling, adorned with sloping gambrel roofs and white wood paneling.</p><p>The floor plan was open and as she walked into the room, she was met with the sight of midcentury furnishings; they looked like something out of Quincey’s penthouse and contrasted nicely with the warm rustic wood surroundings.</p><p>A king bed sat to her left, draped in a fluffy white duvet. An ottoman rested at the foot of the bed and a small, modern sectional was pushed flush against the opposite wall.</p><p>As she wandered closer to the bed, she noticed two white towels that had been folded to look like swans; they faced each other and created a heart at the point where their heads joined. Spread in front of the swans were the words “<em>Happy Honeymoon,</em>” spelled out with large, fresh orchid petals.</p><p>“Tora, look!” she said and pointed, mentally scolding herself for saying those two words <em>yet again. </em>Tora didn’t seem to mind, though; he strolled up behind her and chuckled over her shoulder.</p><p>“Pfft. Cute.”</p><p>Poppy then turned her attention to the right. Directly ahead of her was a gaping archway that led out onto their own private deck. She pushed a set of dark, heavy drapes aside and her mouth dropped as she took a step outside.</p><p>It was a fairly spacious platform; it was wide enough that she and Tora could both sprawl out side by side. A singular wooden staircase led directly down into the clear, sparkling water. They could go for a swim whenever they wanted.</p><p>Her eyes traveled over a large, overstuffed swivel chair with pillows and a small table that were nudged up against the exterior of the building. It was the perfect place for morning coffee and reading; Poppy noted with a smile that the chair looked big enough that Tora could cuddle with her comfortably.</p><p>Poppy made her way back inside, where she found Tora exploring the other end of the bungalow. She joined him in the modern, luxurious bathroom: a sleek countertop housed two sinks and a wide, horizontal mirror hung above them. The toilet was in a corner, obscured by a half wall and a white freestanding bathtub stood in the middle of the room.</p><p>On the other side of the tub, there was a frosted glass wall with two large, sliding doors. As she and Tora pulled them open, they were met with a literal <em>room </em>for showering: there were two shower heads on either end of the space and a teak bench in the middle, more than likely meant for shaving your legs.</p><p>“Huh,” Tora said after a moment. “S’like this room was made for shower sex.”</p><p>Poppy laughed and swiped at his shoulder. “Is that all you ever think about?” she teased, trying to ignore the insistent pulsing between her legs.</p><p>“What? It’s our honeymoon. Thought we were supposed to be thinkin’ about it,” he chuckled, moving his body to the side to dodge her little blow.</p><p>“Just sayin’, Bobby,” he said as his eyes wandered over the shower room approvingly. “Won’t be as cramped as it is at home.”</p><p>They retreated into the main living area where Tora flopped onto his back on the bed. He laced his fingers behind his head, turned his head to her and grinned as he patted the space next to him. Poppy crawled onto the bed, careful not to disturb the swans and floral words. She laid her head down on a fluffy pillow and faced him.</p><p>“So… um, now that we’re here… what do you want to do?” she asked and bit her lip. Her face felt hot.</p><p>His smile stretched further across his face, fully showcasing his dimples. “Plenty of time for that, Bobby,” he told her with a knowing look. “There’ll be at least one day where I won’t let ya leave the cabin, promise.” He winked at her before asking, “Would ya be mad if I said I wanted to take a nap before dinner? Didn’t sleep well on the plane.”</p><p>Poppy sighed, a little relieved. Since she had laid down on the bed, she could feel her earlier desire leaving her as she sunk into the lush mattress. They’d had a long trip; it wouldn’t hurt to take a nap and regain some energy.</p><p>“Sure,” she said and offered him a small smile. “That sounds good.”</p><p>Tora climbed off the bed and Poppy followed suit. They kicked off their shoes and just before he pulled the covers back, she shrieked at him.</p><p>“Wait!”</p><p>Tora froze.</p><p>“I want to take a picture of the swans and the flowers,” she told him as she rifled through her bag for the digital camera.</p><p>Tora chuckled as he settled the sheets back down. “Only you, Bobby. Only you.”</p><p>---</p><p>Poppy awoke to the sound of her birth control alarm going off on her phone. 5:00. They’d been asleep for just over two hours.</p><p>Before she sat up to take her pill, Poppy rolled over and faced her still slumbering husband. She smiled at his mass of black hair tangled across the pillow, the fan of his perfect eyelashes, his parted mouth. He was snoring, something he didn’t do unless he was completely comfortable and relaxed. Her smile stretched wider at the thought; it wasn’t often he was able to sleep so deeply.</p><p>Poppy gently scoot off the bed, determined to let him nap for a little while longer. She crossed the room to her bag, plucked a pill from its plastic compact and downed it with a bottle of water she’d taken from the mini fridge.</p><p>Poppy hoisted her luggage over her shoulder and made her way into the bathroom, where she tidied her hair into a braid, dabbed on some light make up and slipped into her favorite yellow sundress. No sooner was she struggling with tying the back of the dress closed, there was a light rapping on the door.</p><p>“Okay to come in?” the muffled voice of her husband asked.</p><p>“Yeah, I could actually use your help,” she said as the door swung inward. She turned her back to him and gestured at the troublesome strings. “Pretty please?”</p><p>Tora chuckled as he lifted them from her hands and began tying them together. “Much rather be untyin’ ‘em, Bobby, but since ya asked so nice,” he murmured, his breath warm on the nape of her neck. His long, deft fingers traced a line up her spine and she shivered under his touch.</p><p>“Found your second wind?” she asked softly as his mouth pressed a hot kiss to her bare shoulder. “Tora, we’re going to be late for dinner. We have a reservation.”</p><p>A husky laugh behind her. “I’ll be quic-“</p><p>Poppy spun around and faced him; his cheeks looked as flushed as hers felt. “Yeah, like I haven’t heard that one before,” she giggled and poked him in the chest. “Get dressed, mister. Chop, chop.”</p><p>---</p><p>Their first dinner in Fiji was mellow and welcoming. They were greeted with a warm “Bula!” by the wait staff as they walked through the doors of the Lagoon Restaurant. They were promptly seated at a candlelit outdoor table overlooking the turquoise saltwater. If Poppy listened carefully, she could hear the sounds of gently lapping water and birds chirping in the distance.</p><p>How did this already feel so much like <em>home, a</em> place she could picture herself never leaving?</p><p>Even Tora seemed more at ease here. Poppy peered over the flickering candlelight at her husband; his breathing was deeper, jaw unclenched and the worry lines in his forehead were practically nonexistent. An hour ago, the man had been snoring like a <em>Hoover</em>, for crepe’s sake. There was something about this place that made him more playful, that drew out his carefree side, the side of him that always wanted to relax but couldn’t.</p><p>He was… <em>Tora</em> here.</p><p>The thought warmed Poppy and saddened her at the same time. Maybe, <em>hopefully </em>one day, he’d be able to achieve this level of peace at home.</p><p>Moments later a waiter came to their table and greeted them warmly. They placed their drink orders and instead of limiting themselves to the a la carte menu, they took advantage of the buffet, determined to try as much native island food as they could stomach.</p><p>They piled their plates and bowls high with curry, grilled mahi mahi, root vegetables, cassava chips and green rourou soup. At the end of the meal, Poppy raced back to the buffet for slices of Fijian cakes.</p><p>“Mmmm. Okay, this is my favorite part,” she said as she took another bite of spongy cassava cake.</p><p>Tora laughed. “Of the meal or the trip?”</p><p>Poppy tilted her head. “Both. Definitely both.”</p><p>She was silent as she chewed her dessert thoughtfully and then turned to Tora once again. “What’s your favorite part?” she asked.</p><p>He folded his large arms over his chest. “Just… bein’ here. Away. With you.”</p><p>Poppy beamed at him. “I take it back. That’s my favorite part, too.”</p><p>A laugh rumbled out of him. “Won’t be offended if the cake’s still your favorite part, Bobby.”</p><p>She pretended to blow out a sigh of relief. “Okay, good. I mean, you’re great, but this cake is just… <em>amazeballs.</em>“</p><p>Tora’s hand shot out across the table to pinch her cheek; Poppy squealed and managed to dodge him before he came at her with his other hand. They were still teasing each other when Emori approached their table.</p><p>“Bula, bula, my friends!” he said and smiled brightly at them. “How is your first night in Fiji?”</p><p>“Delicious,” Poppy giggled as she gestured at the now empty plates in front of them.</p><p>“Good, good! My wife and I just finished dinner; we both enjoy the buffet here. Actually,” Emori said, looking back and forth between them, “her father was about to lead a kava ceremony if you’d like to join.”</p><p>At the word <em>kava, </em>excitement rippled through Poppy, straight down to her toes. She’d read about kava rituals in a travel book; it was one of the things she wanted to experience most while they were in Fiji.</p><p>“Yes, we’d love to!” she told Emori. Tora cocked a quizzical brow at her but said nothing.</p><p>“Excellent! We’ll be holding the ceremony over there.” Emori pointed to an open corner under ginger-colored wood rafters; there was a circle of cushions on the floor surrounding a large pot with four long legs. “Ten minutes okay?”</p><p>“Mmmhmm! We’ll be there,” Poppy said.</p><p>“Great. Come see me first, I’ll give you some dried kava to present to my father in law.”</p><p>Emori turned and waved at them over his shoulder before departing toward the ceremonial corner. When Poppy looked across the table at Tora, he shot her a confused look.</p><p>“Bobby,” he said lowly, “the fuck’s kava?”</p><p>---</p><p>Poppy and Tora sat cross-legged on round floor pillows directly across Emori’s father in law, Berenado. After he’d collected every participant’s kava, he pounded the dried roots and poured the powder into a cloth sack mixed with water. Once the mixture had been strained and stirred into the bowl, Berenado filled several half coconut shell bowls with the drink and presented them to his guests.</p><p>As Poppy and Tora were handed their cups, they set them down briefly, clapped their hands once and said “Bula” as they’d been instructed.</p><p>As they lifted the shells to their lips, she whispered to Tora, “Bottoms up.”</p><p>Tora glanced down at the brown water in his bowl with a concerned look and took a leery sip. In a barely audible whisper, she heard her husband say, “Tastes like a fuckin’ mud puddle, Bobby.”</p><p>Poppy had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing. “Drink it fast, Mr. ‘I’ll Be Quick.’”</p><p>In one swift movement that reminded her of the toast at their reception, Tora took in a deep breath and swallowed the liquid in one gulp, then clapped his large hands together three times.</p><p>He smirked at her. “Your turn, kid.”</p><p>Poppy dipped the bowl toward her mouth and thought that she maybe dribbled more kava down her dress than she actually drank. It was bitter, earthy and she wasn’t surprised to find she didn’t like the flavor; she was far more partial to sweets. She’d read that kava was not particularly appreciated for its taste, but more for the calming effect it had on the body. She quickly wiped her mouth before clapping her hands three times.</p><p>They sat quietly and watched as Emori, his friends and members of their family took turns drinking their servings of kava. After fifteen minutes had passed, a pleasant, tingling numbness coated Poppy’s tongue and mouth; a wave of relaxation seeped over her body and she looked at Tora. She felt heavy, mellow.</p><p>“How do you feel, handsome?”</p><p>Tora smiled so widely that the etches of his dimples were deeper than she’d ever seen them.</p><p>“Happy.”</p><p>---</p><p>Thanks to the kava, all they did was sleep as soon as they reached their bungalow.</p><p>It was late morning when they finally rose; they threw some clothes on and headed back to the Lagoon Restaurant to enjoy the remaining hour of the breakfast buffet.</p><p>After they’d sufficiently stuffed themselves with fresh fruit and Fijian pancakes, they wandered back to their overwater bure and collapsed on the bed.</p><p>“So we still have several hours before our tour of the garden starts,” Poppy told him as he lazily scrolled through the honeymoon pictures he’d taken so far on his phone. “Wanna go swim in the lagoon?”</p><p>Tora cracked a smile at her. “Sure, kid. Just let me finish digestin’ my breakfast. Then we’ll go.”</p><p>An hour later, they were in their swimwear, poised on the private staircase that led from the deck into the lagoon below. They’d taken turns daring each other to jump from “just one step higher” and Tora was in the lead.</p><p>He was <em>always </em>in the lead.</p><p>Poppy pushed her wet hair from her eyes as she looked over her shoulder at her husband. “It’s not fair when you won’t let me jump from the higher steps because I’m ‘<em>so little</em>,’” she pointed out. “Can we play a new game? Or try jumping over each other or something? Oh! Would you throw me off the deck?”</p><p>Tora gaped at her. “Ya still high on kava or just outta ya goddamn mind?” he asked her. “No way am I launchin’ a hamster cannonball into the water from all the way up there.”</p><p>“I’m not some fragile little baby!” she huffed. “Okay, what about tossing me from the step you’re on?”</p><p>Tora glanced down at the wooden stair he was planted on, then at the water a few feet below, seemingly gauging if the impact from that height would break her. Finally, he nodded.</p><p>“Fine, get up here.”</p><p>Poppy shrieked in excitement as she clambered toward him. Tora placed one palm beneath her bottom and splayed the other across her upper back. She tucked herself into a ball and as he lifted her up to his shoulders, she heard him say, “Goddamn pain in my ass, ya know that?”</p><p>She turned her head to look at him, feigning admonishment. “Tora! What if that’s the last thing you ever say to me? What if the fall breaks my back or I drown or…”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes and smirked at her. “Hmmpf. I love you, ya little shit,” he said before hauling her over the railing and into the water.</p><p>Poppy collided with the water on a loud smack, causing an eruption of tiny hissing bubbles to tickle and fizzle around her. Maybe it was a bad idea to open her eyes in saltwater, but she just had to know what it looked like down here.</p><p>It was clear, full of gentle ripples and clean, white sand at the bottom. A couple of small brightly colored fish hovered nearby and she smiled, grateful to be a part of their world for just one fleeting moment.</p><p>She swam a few more feet underwater before kicking her legs and breaking the surface. Treading water with one arm, she used her other hand to wipe the saline from her eyes. “Tora,” she giggled as waves lapped at her chin, “that was awe-“</p><p>The hand that was bobbing in the water hit something solid and firm in front of her. Poppy’s eyes shot open, where she was met with the soft, golden gaze of her husband. Water was beading in his hair and rivulets ran down his chest. He was so <em>close</em>; he must have jumped in right behind her.</p><p>“Hey,” he said quietly as he wrapped one arm around her, uneasily treading water with the other. “Just makin’ sure you didn’t break ya back or drown. Ya good?”</p><p>Poppy smiled at him. “Yup. I’m good.”</p><p>“Good. Gettin’ kinda tired of swimming. You wanna… go take a shower?” he asked.</p><p>A deep ache pulsated between her legs at the thought of having sex with Tora for the first time in Fiji. How could she say no?</p><p>“What do you think?” she murmured and let him lead the way.</p><p>---</p><p>Lush.</p><p>The Garden of the Sleeping Giant was just so <em>lush.</em></p><p>Poppy’s inner plant nerd smiled as they pushed through the entrance of the botanical grounds; had she ever even <em>seen </em>so many in one place before?</p><p>At just over forty acres, it was a rainforest in its own right; the gravel pathways and wooden bridges were covered with fluffy greenery and lined with tropical plants, some even taller than Tora. They were quiet as they passed through the first few acres of the garden, their breaths punctuated by the gentle rustling of leaves on the breeze and unseen birds singing in the distance.</p><p>It took everything in Poppy not to squeal as they approached a stone wall decorated with orchids; there were over two thousand varieties in the garden and she wanted to see as many as she could.</p><p>Poppy gazed upwards at the stone structure; it was so large and looming that it seemed to stretch on for miles into the air. Bursts of purple, white and yellow orchids dotted the wall and for a moment, Poppy regarded it as its own galaxy: colorful, petaled stars against a dark, stone sky. She stood and stared at the clusters of blooms as she mentally tried to connect them into different shapes and constellations.</p><p>“Hey Bobby,” Tora said over her shoulder. He pointed upward at a towering, yellow orchid, its petals littered with small, maroon dots. “Look familiar to ya?”</p><p>She smiled at the plant. “Oh, it’s a tiger orchid!” she said as she snapped a picture with the digital camera. “I wonder if ours will ever get that tall.”</p><p>“Not if it takes after ya, it won’t,” Tora chuckled as she playfully pinched his arm.</p><p>When they finally managed to tear their eyes away from the wall of orchids, Poppy took Tora’s hand as they moved further down the rock path. They rounded a sharp bend that led them into a small clearing where the sleeping giant lay: a large, long statue of a woman sleeping on her side, her other seemingly submerged into the ground.</p><p>The bulk of her was constructed and molded with sticky mud and cement; the top of her head and body were blanketed in wild grass, ivy and moss, which only added to the illusion that she was one with the earth.</p><p>“Oh, there she is,” Poppy breathed as she strode closer toward the living sculpture, snapping pictures for Quincey as she went. She stopped in front of a small ankle-height concrete fence and smiled as she read the wood sign attached to it:</p><p>
  <em>Shh… while she sleeps, please do not cross this fence as we do not wish to wake the Mud Maid. </em>
</p><p>“Ain’t this one of the things the princess wanted a picture of?” Tora asked as he came to stand beside her.</p><p>“Shh, read the sign,” Poppy whispered and pointed at the wood plaque. “You don’t want to wake her up.”</p><p>Tora barked out a laugh. “Jesus Christ, Bobby.”</p><p>She smirked up at him and pressed one finger to her lips. “Be quiet, whisper.”</p><p>He rolled his eyes. “We both know yer the one who has issues being quiet,” he whispered back. “Especially when my head’s between ya-“</p><p>“<em>Tora</em>!” she shrieked and then clapped a hand over her mouth, eyes wide.</p><p>
  <em>Shoot.</em>
</p><p>He chuckled and gently drew her hand away from her face, then pressed his finger to her lips.</p><p>“Shh,” he murmured. “Quiet, sweetheart.”</p><p>---</p><p>As they neared the end of the gardens, they were treated to a free, cold drink: pineapple juice mixed with some other sweet flavor that Poppy didn’t recognize. Once they finished their refreshments, they were approached by a heavier set woman in a bright pink floral dress.</p><p>She introduced herself as Hiya and explained that every summer, she collaborated with the owner of the botanical garden to conduct a fresh flower crown class on the grounds. “Would you like to join?” Hiya asked. “Oh, this, <em>this </em>one-“ she gestured at Tora  “-has hair that is just <em>asking</em> for flowers.”</p><p>Tora ran a hand through his hair and glanced down at the ground. “Why do people keep sayin’ that?” he muttered.</p><p>“We’d love to join,” Poppy smiled at her. “How much is it?”</p><p>After Poppy dug around in her purse and handed her the cash, Hiya led them over to a couple of picnic tables where a mother and her young daughter were already sitting, carefully selecting their flowers.</p><p>“Dabe ira, please, sit,” Hiya said. As Poppy and Tora took their seats across from each other at the empty table, Hiya brought over an open wood box full of colorful, fragrant blooms: hibiscus, orchids, frangipani, gardenias and pieces of various greenery.</p><p>She then laid out a spool of grapevine floral wire, green floral wire and wire cutters. She explained that once you chose your flowers, you should first organize them in a circle on the table before attaching them to the crown.</p><p>She quickly demonstrated how to cut and manipulate the grapevine, then showed them how far to trim the flower stems down before using the green wire to secure them to the crown shape. Hiya eventually left them to their own devices and they went to work.</p><p>At first, Poppy felt confident; this was the type of thing her little fingers were made for. She bent and twisted the grapevine wire so it fit around her head. She organized her chosen flowers on top of the wire and once she was satisfied with their order, she cut their stems down and began wiring them to the grapevine.</p><p>Except… the flowers kept wiggling out and falling out of place. Eyebrows furrowed, she began tightening the green wire around the stems. At one point, she accidentally caught some orchid petals in the green wire and due to the added pressure, they tore away from the stem.</p><p>What was she doing wrong?</p><p>Needing a break, Poppy set her crown on the table and looked over at Tora, who was… almost done.</p><p>And it was <em>beautiful. </em></p><p>Absolutely flawless.</p><p>He’d chosen all bright pink florals and was currently tying the last few to the back of the crown. Poppy’s jaw dropped.</p><p>She’d thought he might struggle; his fingers were so much larger than hers.</p><p>
  <em>But they could also be quite dexterous. She’d know.</em>
</p><p>Poppy blushed at the thought. “H-How are you so good at this?” she asked.</p><p>Tora shrugged as he worked the wire around the last flower. “Dunno. Didn’t think I would be. Must be all that woodworkin’ I’ve been doing lately, messing around with all those lil’ nails and screws.”</p><p>She watched his hand deftly tie off the last of the wire and then cut it. He held it up.</p><p>“Whaddya think?”</p><p>“I think… Tyson would be really proud of you,” she smiled.</p><p>Tora smirked, his eyes a little wistful. “Yeah, he would, wouldn’t he?”</p><p>“Me on the other hand… I don’t know <em>what</em> I’m doing wrong,” she said, gesturing to the mess of flowers in front of her. “Would you make it for me?”</p><p>Tora laughed. “Sure, Bobby. Can’t go lettin’ Tyson down.”</p><p>As Tora disassembled and then rebuilt her crown, she grabbed his off the table and plunked it down on his head. She pulled the digital camera from her bag and pointed it at him.</p><p>“Smile for Quincey!” she said.</p><p>Tora glared at her with the biggest, most pissed off looking frown she’d seen him wear in years. Through her shaking laughter, she managed to snap a couple of photos before he dipped his head back down to finish her crown.</p><p>---</p><p>The next morning, after they’d had breakfast and were deciding on the days activities, Poppy took a deep breath and pulled out the drawing from her luggage.</p><p>She approached him on the deck, where he was leaned back in the swivel chair, gazing out over the water.</p><p>“Tora?” she said softly. He looked up at her.</p><p>“Um, so I know we don’t really have any set plans for the day,” she began.</p><p>
  <em>God, why was she so nervous?</em>
</p><p>“And I’ve been thinking about doing this for awhile. I figured while we’re in Fiji, together, would be the perfect time to get it.” She silently passed the piece of paper over to him. He studied it for a moment and then gazed up at her.</p><p>“You wanna…” he trailed off, his eyes flicking back to the paper in his hands.</p><p>“Yeah. I want to get that tattooed on me. Somewhere… maybe around my hip bone?” She paused. “What do you think?”</p><p>“What do I… Shit, Bobby. I fuckin’ love it.” He pushed himself from the chair and stood in front of her. “But… are ya sure?” he asked hoarsely, as though his voice was catching on something in his throat. “They’re permanent. Wouldn’t want ya to regret it. I mean, you could always have it removed, I guess. If ya changed your mind…”</p><p>“Tora.” His eyes met hers. “I will <em>never c</em>hange my mind. Sorry to disappoint you, but you’re stuck with me.”</p><p>He chuckled and exhaled deeply, seemingly relieved. “You got yer lil’ hamster claws in me pretty deep,” he said.</p><p>“Okay, kid. Let’s do it.”</p><p>---</p><p>Three hours later, Poppy was laying back on a cushioned tattoo bench, grimacing at the pricking sensation on her skin. Her shorts were off, the hem of her shirt was pushed up over her belly and Tora was clenching her hand tightly, looking down at her with so much love in his eyes that for a moment, she forgot about the pain.</p><p>“One more line, then you’re done, little lady,” the artist, Granil, told her over the buzzing of the tattoo gun.</p><p>Tora shifted his eyes to look at the freshly inked design on her hip and smiled. “It looks fuckin’ great, Bobby. Just like yer drawing.”</p><p>Finally, the air went silent around them as Granil powered off the gun. “Just going to clean it off for you now,” he said, “then we can take some pictures before I apply the ointment and bandage.”</p><p>Granil dabbed her skin clean and Tora helped her stand up off the bench.</p><p>“Whatcha think?” Tora asked.</p><p>Poppy sucked in a breath, then gazed down at the dark lines now permanently drawn onto her body.</p><p>It was <em>perfect. </em></p><p>The skin stretched over her hip was puffy and red; sprouting along the side of her right hip bone was a long, swooping flower stem. It was all line work, no color and every detail was there: from the dreamy curling of the poppy flower petals on one side to the tiger lily’s freckles on the other.</p><p>Two flowers so completely different, both in looks and needs, but coexisting, growing, blooming, <em>thriving </em>from the same stem.</p><p>Poppy felt her eyes brimming with tears as she gazed up at Tora and Granil, who were looking at her expectantly.</p><p>“I love it,” she choked out. “It’s perfect.”</p><p>Granil broke out into a wide smile. “Great! I’m so glad. You had me worried there for a second,” he laughed.</p><p>“I’m sorry!” she giggled. “I just… it means a lot to me and it’s beautiful. Thank you so, so much, Granil.”</p><p>“My pleasure,” he said. “Want me to take a couple of pictures for you? I’d love to have one for my portfolio as well.”</p><p>“Of course!”</p><p>Her husband’s eyes burned into her while she shifted her body one way and then the other so Granil could photograph different angles of the design. Tora’s eyebrows furrowed into a line, which usually meant he was silently mulling over something important.</p><p>After Granil thoroughly cleaned her tattoo, applied ointment and the bandage, he talked her through the tattoo healing process and how to properly clean it.</p><p>“Though, I’m sure if you have any questions, your husband would be happy to help you,” Granil joked, gesturing toward Tora’s colorful arms.</p><p>Tora nodded, saying nothing, his eyebrows still pulled together.</p><p>“But while you’re still here, do you have any questions for <em>me</em>?” Granil asked.</p><p>“Yeah, I do,” Tora spoke up, his face finally softening. “Ya got time to do another small one?”</p><p>“Absolutely, my next appointment isn’t for another couple hours. What did you have in mind?”</p><p>The next thing Poppy knew, Tora was on his back on the bench, his dark shirt pulled up over his abs and his cargo shorts slid halfway down his thighs. She held his hand and watched with interest as Granil inked a design the size of a half dollar onto his right hip.</p><p>Within thirty minutes, there was a fresh, red-petaled poppy flower permanently rooted on Tora’s skin.</p><p>---</p><p>Later that evening, after cleaning and re-bandaging their tattoos and eating dinner, they reclined back in chairs on the lagoon beach, waiting for a fire show to begin. The sky was painted various shades of deep purples and pinks; Poppy stared hard at them, determined to mentally preserve them to use on a blank canvas when they returned home.</p><p>“So, how close do ya think they’ll get to us?” Tora asked, his eyes roaming up and down the sandy slopes where people were slowly gathering.</p><p>“Who, them?” she asked, gesturing toward the growing crowd of spectators.</p><p>Tora snorted. “No, Bobby. The guys with fire. Ain’t gonna get freaked out, are ya?”</p><p>Poppy hooded her eyes and blinked up at him as daringly as she could. “I’m not sure if you know this about me, but I’m married to a big, scary thug. I <em>love </em>playing with fire.”</p><p>“That so?” he asked softly as he leaned in, his eyes a fierce gold as they locked onto hers.</p><p>“Ya <em>did</em> get a tattoo today…” he murmured. “Yer a fuckin’ badass.”</p><p>His large, rough hand wrapped around her bare knee and slowly slid its way up her thigh, his fingers gently playing just under the hem of her sundress.</p><p>Poppy quickly glanced around at the beachgoers behind them and heard Tora rasp in her ear. “No one’s lookin’, sweetheart.”</p><p>Poppy’s breath caught in her throat as his fingers moved further north until they met the line of her panties. Her heart began to race and she clenched her legs together against the warm desire quickly pooling at her core.</p><p>A low chuckle rumbled out of Tora as he withdrew his hand.</p><p>“You’re a jerk,” she whimpered as she shifted herself around in her seat.</p><p>“Don’t I always make it worth the wait?” he whispered, echoing his words to her from Quincey’s parking garage all those years ago.</p><p>Before she could answer “yes,” a Fijian man wearing a grass skirt and carrying a lit torch strolled across the sand to a large stone bowl. He turned slowly and faced them.</p><p>“Bulaaaaa! Bula Bula!” he cried and the crowd responded in kind.</p><p>The man then touched his torch to the round fire pit; it erupted into flames and the spectators cheered. He introduced himself as Ganesh and went on to explain the history of fire dancing and how for hundreds of years, it had been used for sacred purposes, festivals and celebrations, art, storytelling and even healing. As he spoke, the inky darkness of night stretched across the island, the open flame in front of Ganesh one of the only remaining sources of light.</p><p>Four young Fijians, a woman and three men, made their way onto the beach: they all wore shell necklaces and colorful, patterned sarongs. They each carried long staffs, unlit torches and the woman had a bottle of clear liquid grasped in one hand.</p><p>As Ganesh finished his speech, the fire dancers each took turns lighting their instruments in the fire pit. The drumming sound of intense tribal music swelled over the sand dunes and the dancers began.</p><p>Poppy was captivated as they juggled and tossed these balls of fire to each other, spun them quickly above their heads like burning helicopter blades and then in front of them, like giant, fiery ship propellors.</p><p>She glanced over at Tora as the woman took a hearty drink from the bottle and spat it across the open flame of her staff, breathing fire over one of the other performers.</p><p>Tora sat on the edge of his seat, clearly just as transfixed by the show as she was.</p><p>The only thing more mesmerizing to Poppy was the sight of her husband, his olive skin made warmer and richer by the orange light and sparks of the flames. He was <em>glowing. </em>His eyes studied the entertainers closely, as though he were trying to answer the same mental question she’d been pondering.</p><p>How did they manage to play with fire without being burned?</p><p>
  <em>Playing with fire. </em>
</p><p>Poppy swallowed hard against the racing of her heart. The show completely forgotten to her now, she reached out and rested her hand on Tora’s knee. His eyes darted over to look at her and though it was barely audible over the sound of the thundering music, she heard his breath hitch.</p><p>Slowly her hand slipped up his thick thigh and Tora straightened in his seat, his own hands clenched around the arms of the chair.</p><p>Holding her breath, she slid her hand further, until the tips of her fingers gently brushed against the hard bulge in his pants.</p><p>A hiss shot out between his teeth as he angled his body toward her. In his eyes, she could faintly see the rapid flickering of golden flames as they danced across the sand.</p><p>He leaned in and she felt his hot breath against her ear as he asked, “Wanna get outta here?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>Apparently it was all he needed to hear.</p><p>Without saying another word, Tora quickly stood from his chair. He held out a hand to her and didn’t let go as he led her through the crowd and toward their bungalow.</p><p> </p><p>
  
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>A special shout out goes to my best friend Gaby for the art at the end of this chapter, "Smile for Quincey!" aka Flower Frown Tora. She is an absolute GENIUS and I'm forever grateful for her love and support.</p><p>I also want to thank my husband Travis for letting me jump on his back with luggage; I had to make sure I got the physics of Poppy’s piggyback ride correct and he took it like a champ 😂😂</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Adventure - Part Three</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora go on their honeymoon. </p><p>Told from Poppy and Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Who's ready for MARRIED SMUT?!</p><p>This is the last part of the honeymoon arc and the single longest thing I've ever written, clocking in at over 10,000 words. Thanks for pushing me, BegoniaRex! The 10K club is pretty cool so far.</p><p>I have several of you to thank for requesting Tora and Poppy's honeymoon:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Jlowery13, TifaEsque, Spotlightgirlontherun and Mackgurl2020.</p><p>A special thank you and shout out goes to BegoniaRex, Gaby and OneAndOnlyTako for being my beta readers and even better than that, my friends.</p><p>Also screaming THANK YOU to CopyPastel for our newfound sisterhood AND the art that is now my AO3 icon. Go check out her new work "#SmutSisters" to see more amazing portraits of MPL fanfic writers :) </p><p>I hope you enjoy this last part of Poppy and Tora's honeymoon! Thank you ALL for being here, reading and commenting. Your support means more to me than you know &lt;3</p><p>Love you all and see you soon,</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Well, I'll be your rainy day lover<br/>
Whenever the sunny days end<br/>
And whatever the weather we have each other<br/>
And that's how the story will end”</p><p>-Ben Rector, “Forever Like That”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Poppy</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>When they arrived at their bungalow, Poppy couldn’t get the door open fast enough.</p><p>Between Tora’s hands wrapped around her waist, his hot, insistent kisses on the nape of her neck and the feeling of his erection nudging into her lower back, she couldn’t think straight. Her hands were trembling with anticipation as she reached into her bag for the cabin key. Once she lifted it out, she dropped it onto the dock.</p><p>“Shoot,” she breathed and bent over to pick it up. As her bottom pressed more firmly into Tora, his grip on her tightened.</p><p>“Sweetheart, you’re killin’ me,” he groaned. “Either ya unlock that door or I’m gonna break it down.”</p><p>“Well, if <em>someone </em>wasn’t being so distracting, I would’ve had it open by now,” she smirked over her shoulder. “Give me just a second, tiger.”</p><p>Tora chuckled and released his hold on her. Poppy sighed internally, immediately missing the feel of his large hands digging into her hips, but at least now she was able to focus.</p><p>Despite her shaking fingers, Poppy slid the key smoothly into the lock and turned it carefully; the last thing she needed was for it to break off in the door because she was in a rush.</p><p>
  <em>"Hi Emori, this is Poppy. I broke the key off in my room door because I was sexually aroused and in a hurry. Would you mind helping me get into the cabin so I can bang my husband?”</em>
</p><p>The door opened on a satisfying click; as they walked in, she flung her purse aside, Tora locked the door behind them and then he was on her.</p><p>The room was dark; they’d forgotten to leave the patio drapes open. Without breaking away from her, Tora’s hand scrabbled along the wall until he found the light switch and clicked it on. The bungalow was bathed in soft, warm light and he grinned down at her.</p><p>“Wanna see ya,” he said.</p><p>With his hands on her hips, his head dipped low and his mouth moving roughly against hers, Tora shuffled them in a fevered dance toward the bed.</p><p>When Poppy felt the edge of the mattress dig into the back of her legs, she collapsed on the duvet, stealing just a split second to gaze up at her husband.</p><p>Tora’s breathing was ragged and his eyes were hooded, glazed over with desire. Lips puffy from her kisses. His shirt collar was rumpled and his dark hair was tangled, most of it pulled out of its half bun by her roaming hands.</p><p>
  <em>Lucky.</em>
</p><p>How was she so lucky?</p><p>Before she could reach out to him, Tora was planting his knees on the side of the bed and straddling her. He curled one arm around her back and on all fours, he walked her to the center of the bed.</p><p>Once again Tora crushed his mouth to hers, licking and nipping at her lips like a man starved. His big hands cupped the sides of her head, most of his weight balanced on his elbows. Poppy always loved the feeling of him on top of her; how was it even <em>easier</em> to breathe when she was caged beneath his hard, heavy body?</p><p>She kissed him back feverishly, her tongue exploring every corner of his mouth. Tora rocked his pelvis against her; his hard cock dug into her center, pushing the thin fabric of her panties into her slick folds. Poppy tore her mouth away and moaned as he ground into her again, this time nudging his erection against her clit.</p><p>“Mmmmm, Tora,” Poppy whimpered.</p><p>Familiar, pleasant pressure began building in her belly before sinking and coiling tightly in her crotch. She tensed her thighs and rocked her lower body upward, chasing the feeling.</p><p>Poppy threw her arms around Tora’s neck, her fingers pulling at his hair as he blazed a trail of hot kisses across her jawline, down her throat, <em>that </em>spot behind her ear. She panted and wriggled her hips, desperate for more friction.</p><p>Tora arched his back and curled his body more thoroughly around her, clinging tightly to her as he thrust at her, each one harder than the last.</p><p>Suddenly, a cool wave of air washed over her bare neck and chest as his weight left her. Poppy watched as Tora sat up and gripped the back of his shirt collar, tugging it over his head before tossing it to the floor.</p><p>He kissed her once more before dragging his face down her chest, her torso. Tora fingered the hem of her dress and lifted it up until it laid across the middle of her belly. His head dipped to the skin of her right hip, his lips feather light around the edge of her bandaged tattoo.</p><p>“Can’t believe ya did this for me,” he murmured, his words snaking warmly over her bare skin.</p><p>Poppy wanted to respond, but the words caught in her throat, still dry from moaning and panting his name.</p><p>
  <em>When will you realize there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you, you ridiculous man? Like marrying you. Getting a tattoo for you. Packing for our honeymoon and going back for the embarrassing lingerie your stupid brother bought for me…</em>
</p><p>The lingerie.</p><p>“Um, Tora?”</p><p>He raised his head. “Yeah, sweetheart?” he whispered, his voice thick with desire.</p><p>“C-can we hit the pause button for a minute?”</p><p>The mattress dipped around her as he crawled back up the length of her body. He brought his face close to hers. “Sure. S’everything okay?”</p><p>“Yeah. I just want to freshen up in the bathroom first, if that’s okay?”</p><p>He nodded and rolled himself off her, sinking into the other side of the mattress. “Whatever ya gotta do.”</p><p>Poppy slid off the bed and collected her luggage before shutting herself in the bathroom. Once inside, she pulled the scrunchie from her hair and shook it out until it fell in loose waves around her shoulders. She stooped down and pulled out the lingerie from her bag.</p><p>Before she could lose her nerve, Poppy stripped off her clothes and stepped into the thong and chemise. As she pulled the thin straps over her shoulders, she regarded herself closely in the full-length mirror hanging on the door.</p><p>She had to give Quincey credit; it really <em>was</em> beautiful, something she would have picked out for herself, if she’d ever felt comfortable shopping for this sort of thing, anyway. It was blush pink, all lace and shorter than anything she’d ever worn in her life, barely reaching the top of her thighs. There was a deep V that narrowed to a point just above her belly button and three thin, velvet ribbons stretched across her skin, connecting the fabric on either side of the plunging neckline.</p><p>Poppy turned slowly to study herself from the side. Her eyes locked onto the pooch of her stomach; it puffed out just over the line of the thong and she frowned. She’d never been a size two and for the most part, she’d been okay with it, but standing here in lingerie for the first time ever, she wished she’d lost a little weight before their trip.</p><p>
  <em>"The man is a sucker for your curves and you know it.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Of all the times to hear Quincey’s voice in your head, it has to be now when you’re standing in front of a mirror, practically naked. </em>
</p><p>Poppy had to smile at her brother in law’s words, though. The man had a point. Tora had always loved how soft she was; he never failed to remind her she was beautiful and that her curves were one of the sexiest things about her.</p><p>Even after all their years together, marriage and a few extra stubborn pounds, his enthusiasm for her body remained the same.</p><p>Reassured by the thought, Poppy turned once more, facing herself in front of the mirror. The lace dress hugged her hips in all the right places and it made her cleavage look <em>great. </em>That was something she could appreciate.</p><p>And she knew Tora would, too.</p><p>Poppy took a deep sigh, let it out slowly and stepped into the living room.</p><p>---</p><p>Poppy slipped so quietly into the living area that at first, Tora didn’t hear her.</p><p>He was laying shirtless on the bed, facing the ocean. At some point while she’d been in the bathroom, he’d gotten up and turned the overhead lights off. Instead of soft orange, the room was painted silver by the moonlight spilling through the now open patio door. A refreshing sea-scented breeze brushed past Poppy and she sighed; this had been part of her fantasy after all, having sex with Tora in their bedroom in Fiji, the doors and drapes flung wide open to let the outside in.</p><p>Tora must have heard her sigh; his head turned in her direction and as his eyes locked onto her, he sucked in a breath through his teeth.</p><p>“Jesus <em>fuckin…</em>” he trailed off, his wide eyes sweeping over every inch of her. He didn’t speak for several moments; he just continued to gaze at her with a parted mouth, his body propped up on one elbow.</p><p>It was rare that she could surprise Tora with things like this; he was usually hyper-intuitive and observant. Throw in her own inability to contain her excitement, her knack for bad lying and there wasn’t much Tora hadn’t been able to figure out in their years together.</p><p>So pulling <em>this</em> off? It felt good.</p><p>And the way he was looking at her felt even better.</p><p>Poppy allowed him to stare for a few seconds longer before breaking the silence.</p><p>“I’ve never worn, um… Do you like it?” she murmured as her fingers found the hem of the chemise. In the pale light of the moon, the pink lace was practically gossamer. “Quincey bought it for me and-“</p><p>Tora swallowed before finally speaking. “Ah, can we not talk about him right now?”</p><p>She giggled. “Sorry.”</p><p>“Poppylan.” The sudden seriousness of his tone drew her eyes upward to meet his. “Get over here now.”</p><p>Poppy slipped onto the bed and crawled toward him, purposely angling herself to give him a nice eyeful of her cleavage. When she reached him, Tora flipped her over onto her back and slid his right arm behind her neck. He clutched her to him with one strong hand on her shoulder.</p><p>Tora lowered his head until his mouth rested on the shell of her ear. “’Course I like it,” he whispered. “Yer outta ya goddamned mind if you thought anythin’ different.”</p><p>He kissed her then, his thumb tracing slow circles on the skin of her shoulder. While his lips moved insistently against hers, the fever of earlier was gone, instead simmering to a slow burn.</p><p>Poppy lifted her hand to his cheek. She could feel his jaw working against her fingertips as he kissed her firmer, deeper. His tongue slipped past her lips and tasted her deeply; it wrangled with her own until she was panting for breath.</p><p>When his mouth moved from her lips to suck the skin of her throat, Poppy groaned. “<em>Tora</em>, get back here.”</p><p>Tora said nothing; he only chuckled as he brushed his lips across her collarbone and then the plane of her chest. He brought one large hand up to palm her breast while his mouth hovered over the other. She could feel his waiting breath through the fabric of her nightie, hot across her nipple.</p><p>Poppy let out a sharp gasp and threw her head back into the pillow as he sucked her nipple into his mouth. His tongue scraped the lace against her sensitive peak; it was rough but the friction felt good on her skin.</p><p>He continued to roll his tongue over her until she was panting and writhing beneath him. “T-Tora… please. I ne- I need…”</p><p>He lifted his head and scooted down the bed. Tora looked up at her. “Whaddya need?” he murmured and pressed a kiss to her stomach. He pushed the hem of the chemise up and once again, his lips touched the skin around her tattoo.</p><p>Her lust for him wrapped thickly around her tongue.</p><p>“I- I don’t…”</p><p>God, she didn’t know, couldn’t even think straight. She needed something, <em>anything. </em>Anything he was willing to give her.</p><p>Tora’s mouth sloped over her right hip. She felt the wet warmth of his tongue as he rolled it over her hip bone, then the hard edge of his teeth as he nipped gently at her. His finger curled around the strap of her thong and he exhaled hard.</p><p>“Fuckin’ hell, Bobby,” he whispered as he tugged the fabric down her thighs. “Ya sexy lil’ thing.”</p><p>Poppy didn’t realize how aroused she was until Tora exposed her to the chilled ocean air; she shivered as it hit her wet center. How was it possible to feel so cold and so <em>hot </em>at the same time?</p><p>The mattress shifted slightly as Tora moved on the bed. He scooted down until his face was aligned with her mound. He was so close she could feel his breath against the most sensitive part of her.</p><p>Suddenly, his hand was splayed across her thigh and his thumb grazed down lightly on her clit. Her hips bucked up involuntarily against his touch. Poppy lifted her head off the pillow to gaze down at him.</p><p>“Tora, <em>please,</em>” she panted, “just do it!”</p><p>She felt the deep bass of his chuckle rumble against her as he pressed a chaste kiss to her folds. “So feisty. Not really in a position to be bossin’ anyone, sweetheart. Lemme enjoy myself for a second. Then I’ll give ya what you want.”</p><p>His gold eyes flicked up to her own and he raised his eyebrows slightly.</p><p>How could she <em>not </em>trust him when he was looking at her like that? Like someone who was worthy of being worshipped?</p><p>Her head fell back against the pillow and she moaned as the tip of his thumb parted her wet seam and gently traced a line up and down, up and down. His other hand slipped beneath her thigh and shifted it to the side, widening her opening to him.</p><p>Poppy squeezed her eyes shut and huffed at his teasing slowness. Did the man have to be so purposeful in <em>everything</em> he did? She felt like one of his presents on their first Christmas together; he was just taking his sweet time getting inside of her.</p><p>Good lord, was spontaneous combustion really a thing?</p><p>
  <em>Five Foot Nothing Woman Dies from Teasing, Husband Pleads “Absolutely Fudgin’ Guilty.”</em>
</p><p>Poppy gradually lost control of her body as Tora continued his torture of her, spreading her wetness across her swollen lips. Her head whipped back and forth on the pillow, the sheets muffling her cries. Her hips twitched upward and her thighs trembled against his face.</p><p>And her hands. She didn’t know what to do with them. Palms pressed to the headboard, tight fists clenched into the duvet. Then fingers knotting, opening and closing in his long hair. She looked down at him and tried to slide her hands around back of his head to pull him to her center, but the man refused to budge. His face remained where it was, hovering over her mound as his thumb relentlessly swept over her.</p><p>Poppy shoved her head back into the pillow with a frustrated cry. Just when she thought she couldn’t take anymore, his thumb pulled away and then he was sliding two fingers into her as deep as they would go.</p><p>Poppy gasped and her eyes slammed shut. Her heartbeat caught in her chest at the friction, that feeling of <em>finally </em>being full. Her back arched away from the mattress as he steadily pumped his fingers into her. With every thrust of his hand, he stroked her higher into pleasure.</p><p>When the wet heat of his mouth closed over her clit, Poppy choked out a sob and clenched her legs around his head.</p><p>“Oh god, Tora,” Poppy cried out. Between the sensation of his fingers and mouth working at her and the lightheadedness from her erratic breathing, she felt close to mindless, forgetting where she was.</p><p>The coil clenched tightly at her center suddenly snapped and sent a warm wave rushing through her. Poppy silently arched away from the mattress and her thighs shook hard against Tora’s cheeks as she rode out her orgasm.</p><p>When she came back down to the bed, Tora was sliding his body up to lay beside her. Poppy’s breathing was ragged as she blinked up at him. His eyes were soft and his wet lips were curled up in a smirk.</p><p>“Worth the wait?” he asked quietly and kissed her.</p><p>“Y-yeah.”</p><p>Poppy laid on her back for several moments, willing her breath to come back to her. Finally, when she regained control of herself, she rolled over on top of Tora. He flattened himself on the mattress and cupped his hand around the back of her head. Their lips met hungrily; she could taste her musk on his tongue as it darted into her mouth.</p><p>She planted her hands on his shoulders and kissed his chin, his throat, his collarbone. Poppy brushed her lips across his chest, his abs and her tongue tasted the skin along the edge of his poppy flower. She heard a breath hiss between his teeth as she nipped lightly at him just below his tattoo. She blinked up at him; his eyes were blazing behind his long lashes.</p><p>“My turn,” she whispered.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>Of all the ways he could’ve been killed over the years, Tora never thought he’d meet his end at the mouth of a hamster.</p><p>Poppy had made quick work of removing his pants and boxers, yanking them from his legs. Once she’d flung them to the floor, she took her time climbing his right leg, gently biting at his calf muscle and planting open mouth kisses to the inside of his thigh.</p><p>Tora had known before he’d even started teasing her that Poppy would get back at him, but he didn’t give a shit. It was worth it to watch her slowly lose her mind and then feel the pulsing of her pussy as she came hard against his hand.</p><p>The woman deserved to be worshipped. Not only had she walked out from the bathroom in the sexiest piece of clothing to ever cling to her body, but she’d gotten a tattoo. For them. For <em>him.</em></p><p>Obviously their wedding rings meant the world to him, but a tattoo was just… different. Rings could be lost, taken off, given back. A tattoo was permanent, everlasting. Something that caused her pain to receive, made her bleed. And she’d done it anyway. It was like she’d made her wedding vows to him all over again, without even saying a word. Tattoos were <em>his </em>language; for most of his life, ink was the only way he could outwardly express himself. The only thing Vincent couldn’t take from him.</p><p>And today, he’d watched and held her hand as Poppy received her own ink, an expression in his native tongue written on her body forever.</p><p>Fuck, he’d wanted to kiss her newly inked skin over and over, run his tongue across it until his jaw ached. And he would, later. When it finally healed.</p><p>Tora’s head dipped back into the pillow as Poppy licked the crease where his leg met his hip. “<em>Fuck</em>,” he hissed to the ceiling as she lightly tugged at the skin with her teeth. “Not sayin’ I don’t deserve it, but yer a lil’ brat.”</p><p>She blinked her big brown eyes up at him and smirked. She moved her head toward his other leg, purposely brushing her cheek against his hard cock. It twitched on its own as it touched her skin, but she ignored it and planted a string of kisses on the inside of his leg instead. He groaned.</p><p>She really <em>was</em> trying to kill him.</p><p>Tora’s fingers clenched into the sheets as Poppy’s hot little mouth made passes over his groin, licking, nibbling and sucking. Her fingertips danced around the small patch of hair at the base of his shaft, careful not to touch it.</p><p>This goddamn woman.</p><p>This little thing who had burrowed her way into his life, made a home for herself inside his heart and deemed it worthy enough to stay.</p><p>Christ, she could do <em>whatever </em>she wanted to him.</p><p>Tora tried to keep his breathing even as Poppy continued to tease at him. Her little hands wrapped around his thighs as far as they could go, her fingers digging slightly into his muscles. She dropped a soft kiss to his groin and then to the bottom of his cock.</p><p><em>Fuck</em>, she was driving him crazy. He wanted to grip the sides of her head and hold her steady while he sunk himself inside her mouth. <em>Wanted </em>to but wouldn’t.</p><p>Instead, he held onto the sheets for dear life, determined to let her keep control.</p><p>Finally, just when his heart was threatening to pound out of his chest, she licked a line from the base of his cock to the tip; her mouth rounded over the head and released it with a soft <em>pop.</em></p><p>Tora groaned and held his breath as he waited.</p><p>Suddenly his hard length was engulfed in the wet warmth of her mouth and he gasped. His head lifted from the pillow to watch as she bobbed over him, her cheeks hollowing in and out as she sucked earnestly.</p><p>“<em>Fuck</em>,” Tora panted. “Fuck, Poppylan.”</p><p>He slid his hands through her hair and immediately her own hands encircled his wrists, pulling them from her head and anchoring them to the bed on either side of his waist.</p><p>Tora choked out a laugh as a jolt of pleasure raced through him; there was always something about being in control that seemed to drive her crazy. And fuck if he was too proud to admit that he loved when she was bold and dominant with him.</p><p>That telltale pressure began building in his groin as Poppy slid her mouth up and down his cock; its head hit the back of her throat a couple of times and then she began to meet it with her tongue. God damnit, if she didn’t stop soon he was going to come.</p><p>Once her hand curled around him and began thrusting in time with her mouth, Tora could feel the pleasure rising, pulsing through his body and threatening to claim him. He forced himself to sit up and gently pulled her off him.</p><p>“Getting close?” Poppy asked around a small, knowing smile. She also sat up and tucked her legs beneath her.</p><p>“Yeah, too close,” he breathed and reached a hand out to her. “C’mere.”</p><p>Poppy took it and crawled up his legs until she was straddling his lap on her knees and his engorged cock was resting against her belly. Tora fingered the hem of her lingerie and began to lift it straight up.</p><p>“Much as I love this,” he said, “I wanna feel all of ya.”</p><p>She lifted her arms over her head so he could slide the nightie from her body. Once she was naked, he bent his head to her chest and pressed kisses to the swells of her bare breasts. His lips moved up to her collarbone, her jaw and then found her mouth.</p><p>He kissed her softly and splayed one hand out on the back of her head.</p><p>“I love ya, Bobby,” he told her. “Love ya so <em>goddamn much</em>.”</p><p>“Mmm, I love you too,” she said and wrapped her arms around his neck. She shifted her hips upward as he grasped his cock in one hand and lined it up to her entrance. She pressed down and then he was inside of her.</p><p>They moaned as she slid down until he was completely sheathed in her warmth. They stilled for a moment, both breathing hard and reveling in the feeling of being connected before Poppy began to move.</p><p>She braced her tiny hands on his shoulders and peppered his neck with kisses as she lightly bounced her hips over him. The feel of his cock slicking in and out of her made his heart race and his hands scrabbled up and down her back, pulling her to his chest.</p><p>Christ, he was <em>inside </em>of her and still felt like he wasn’t close enough. He could live here, buried in her tight warmth, wrapped in her embrace.</p><p>Poppy leaned into him, her soft pants sweeping over the tattoo on his neck as she moved. He kissed her cheek, then lowered his hands to her hips and rested them there, ready to take over the moment she tired.</p><p>Tora’s thumb nudged along the edge of Poppy’s bandaged tattoo and something heavy and pleasant sunk deep into his gut, nestling itself beside the lust that was prickling away at him.</p><p>While he prided himself on knowing nearly every single thing about her, she never ceased to amaze him. And this tattoo? What it <em>meant t</em>o him?</p><p>Fuck, he was never getting over it.  </p><p>Poppy continued to roll her body over him, sliding nearly all the way off his cock before plunging back down around him. She pulled back then, pressing her hands into his chest for leverage and arching her back as she let out a long, low moan.</p><p>Tora brought one of his hands up and palmed her breast, rolling one nipple between two fingers. She gasped and arched her back deeper, pushing her tit more firmly into his hand. He looked up at her then, at her closed eyes, her parted lips creating shapes around soft cries, her tangled brown hair catching speckles of moonlight.</p><p>Fuck, she was beautiful.</p><p>Had it <em>ever </em>been like this before? They’d had sex, fucked, made love more times than he could count, but this time it was different. Maybe it was because they were relaxed, away on their honeymoon. Or maybe it was the sea-salted air combined with the scent of her arousal that was overwhelming him. Whatever it was, he’d never felt closer to her or more a <em>part </em>of something in his whole life.</p><p>Tora’s hands climbed her body until they were cupping her face and he kissed her deeply. She hummed against his mouth and then broke her face away.</p><p>“Tora,” she gasped, her hips beginning to falter in their rhythm, “please.”</p><p>He didn’t have to ask what she meant. He lifted her off him and laid her down on the bed. He twisted his body until he was hovering over her, one hand around his cock. He pushed back inside of her and wrapped his arms around her back, cradling her head with one hand as he rocked his hips into her.</p><p>Poppy’s cries filled his ears as he ground his feet into the mattress and thrust harder into her warmth. She was always so tight and wet, always fitting his length perfectly. She hooked her ankles around his lower back and pulled him closer; the angle changed slightly as she drove him in deeper. Pleasure lanced through his groin and he pumped faster inside her, determined to make her come one more time before he did.</p><p>Tora drew her into a long kiss and his hand moved down to thumb circles on her clit.</p><p>“<em>Oooh</em>,” Poppy groaned and ground her hips up against him. He continued stroking her bud as he hammered into her and suddenly, she went quiet. Her eyes flickered shut and her body arched into him as her inner walls clenched down hard on his cock. He slowed the movement of his hips, wanting her to finish before he let go.</p><p>After a moment, her back fell to the bed, her tits heaving with her breaths as she looked up at him. Her eyes were heavy, lidded, blinking slowly. She cupped her hands around his face and pulled him down to her mouth. She kissed him firmly, her tongue stroking against his. Desire raced through his veins and he moved his hands down to her hips, pinning her to the bed so he could chase his own pleasure.</p><p>Tora rammed his cock into her, deeper and deeper as he kissed her, his lips humming against hers. With every thrust into his wife, his pleasure climbed higher, from his groin to behind his eyes and then it crashed over him like a thundering wave, drowning him in ecstasy.</p><p>He buried his face in her neck as he came apart, her skin muffling his moans. His hips rocked once, twice more as he spilled himself inside of her and then he collapsed, boneless and sated on top of her.</p><p>Poppy’s fingers skimmed over his back, lightly tracing random patterns across his muscles. When his breath returned to him, he summoned the strength to prop himself up on his elbows. His hands framed her face and he lowered his head to kiss her before rolling over onto the bed.</p><p>She immediately molded herself into his side and splayed her hand across his chest. Tora slipped his arm around her shoulders and pressed his lips to her sweaty temple.</p><p>“Christ, Bobby,” he said.</p><p>“What?” she murmured as her fingers slid over the divots of his abs.</p><p>“Dunno how ya do it, but it always feels like the first time with ya.”</p><p>“Mmm,” she hummed beside him. “I had a good teacher.”</p><p>He smirked and then groaned as the heat of her body dissipated and was replaced with the cool night air. “Where ya goin’?” he asked, rolling over onto his stomach. His gaze followed her as she rounded the bed.</p><p>“I’ll be right back, tiger,” she giggled. “I just need to clean myself up really quick.”</p><p>“Hurry up, punk. Wanna hold ya.”</p><p>Poppy stuck her tongue out at him before closing herself in the bathroom.</p><p>He chuckled and pulled at the covers until they fell across his waist. Tora shifted onto his back, allowing himself to sink into the mattress. He must have been more tired than he realized because the next thing he knew, his eyes were flicking open to the feeling of Poppy climbing into the bed.</p><p>There was a soft kiss on his lips before she whispered, “I love you. Good night, Tora.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Two Days Later </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>Tora awoke to the sound of thundering waves slamming into the outside of the bungalow, of rising pressure pushing into the little hut. His face was wet; <em>Christ, was he underwater?</em> His cheeks ached, like there was someone drilling holes into his sinus cavities.</p><p>He coughed once, twice and tried to take a large breath. Nothing.</p><p>He couldn’t breathe; he tried to swallow and his throat felt grainy, painful, like he’d been gargling salt water all night.</p><p>Tora sat up in the bed, feeling as though his brain was rattling around in his head. He looked over to find a naked Poppy still sleeping on the mattress, the sheet dipping over the swell of her hips. Had she not felt or heard anything that just happened? The thundering, the harsh pressure, the water…</p><p>He ran a hand over his face and when he pulled it back, his palm was gleaming with sweat.</p><p>Was it all in his head?</p><p>Was he… sick?</p><p>No. Impossible. He rarely got sick. And he was in Fiji. They were on their honeymoon. No <em>way </em>would he come down with something during his first time away with his wife.</p><p>But even as these thoughts entered his mind, the room felt like it was spinning around him. He felt like that fucking chick with pigtails in the movie Poppy made him watch last year, the one with the red shoes.</p><p>Tora laid his head back down on the pillow, wincing at the persistent pounding and pressure behind his eyes.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck.</em>
</p><p>He wasn’t sick. Couldn’t be.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.</em>
</p><p>“Tora?” The soft voice of Poppy drifted across the sheets as she stirred beside him. “Are you okay?” He must have looked as shitty as he felt; the next thing he knew, she was pressed into his side, reaching out to him.</p><p>Cool relief on his forehead.</p><p>Christ, her hands were so cold. Or… maybe it was his skin that was hot.</p><p>“Oh my gosh, you’re burning up,” she said and pulled her hand away. He felt the bed shift slightly beneath him as her weight left it. She stood and began slipping into her clothes. “I’m going to grab some food from the buffet for you and after you eat, I’ll give you some Tylenol to help break that fever. I’ve got some in my bag somewhere,” she said, her voice muffled around her last words as she ducked down to dig through her luggage.</p><p>Fuck, the last thing he wanted was for her to take care of him while she was on <em>vacation. </em>For most of his life, his body was the one thing he’d had control over. And now, within the span of two goddamn days, it had betrayed him, let down its defenses and fucked it all up.</p><p>When had he even caught it? At the airport? On the plane? Somewhere in the resort?</p><p>Why wasn’t Poppy sick, too?</p><p>
  <em>Because she got her flu shot before you left Narin and you didn’t. Told her you would, but you forgot, dumbass.</em>
</p><p>Fuck. Why couldn’t everything just be <em>perfect</em>?</p><p>“Poppy, I can grab my own damn breakfast,” he grumbled. He sat up and immediately regretted it; his brain pulsed painfully behind his skull and his hands shot to his face, willing it to stop.</p><p>“Yeah, like I’m going to let <em>that </em>happen,” Poppy replied and suddenly she was there, helping to ease him back down onto the bed, under the covers. “Just stay here and rest. I’ll be back in a bit.”</p><p>The last thing Tora remembered was hearing the door click shut behind her before he fell asleep.</p><p>He wasn’t sure how long it’d been when he awoke to her murmuring his name.</p><p>“I brought you some fresh fruit,” she said softly as his eyes flickered open. “There’s also bacon, pancakes and orange juice.” He sat up and accepted the takeout boxes from her, mumbling his thanks.</p><p>“I ran into Emori while I was there. He asked where you were and I told him you were sick. He told me he’d swing by the resort later on tonight; he has a couple of things that might make you feel better.”</p><p><em>Great. </em>Now he was putting yet <em>another </em>person out.</p><p>She set a bottle of water on his nightstand and plunked a couple of pills beside it. “When you’re finished eating, take those and drink as much of that water as you can, okay? I just need to make a phone call.”</p><p>As Tora nibbled at his breakfast, he heard Poppy shuffle into the bathroom, speaking to someone on the phone. She left the door cracked open behind her, but he couldn’t quite make out what she was saying. The tone of her voice sounded apologetic, regretful.</p><p>When she emerged a few minutes later, she was talking to herself, mumbling under her breath. “Okay, that’s taken care of.”</p><p>“What’s-“</p><p>“All finished?” she asked, gesturing toward the empty Styrofoam containers.</p><p>“Yeah,” he said as she cleared the boxes from his lap and took them to a trash can across the room. “What’s taken care of, Bobby?”</p><p>She moved back over to the bed, placing the pills and water bottle in his hands. “Get that medicine in you,” she said. He knocked the pills back and sucked down half the water bottle before laying back down. He looked at her expectantly.</p><p>Poppy bit her lip. “Um, we were supposed to… go snorkeling. Today. This afternoon with Coral Cats. But you’re sick and-“</p><p>Her words were a punch right in the fucking gut.</p><p>Fuck. Shit. <em>Fuck.</em></p><p>Tora buried his face into his pillow and groaned. He <em>knew </em>how much she’d been looking forward to snorkeling; he wasn’t particularly thrilled about it, he’d never been the strongest swimmer, but he wanted to do it with her. She’d been so damn excited.</p><p>Tora lifted his head. “You should still go,” he told her, looking her in the eyes so she could see how much he meant it. “I know it was one of the things ya wanted to do most in Fiji.”</p><p>Not only that, but <em>he </em>wanted her to.</p><p>Poppy offered him a small smile. “That’s sweet, Tora, but I’m not about to leave you he-“</p><p>“Can take care of myself, Bobby.”</p><p>She sighed. “I know you can, Mr. Six Foot Three. But I wanted to go snorkeling <em>with you. </em>That was the whole point. I thought it would be fun to do it together. I don’t want to if you’re not there.”</p><p>Tora squeezed his eyes shut. Fuck, his chest was aching almost as much as his head. What had he ever done to deserve her?</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he said.</p><p>Poppy leaned in and pressed a kiss to his damp forehead. “There’s nothing to be sorry for. Why don’t you try and get some more sleep? I’ll wake you up when it’s time for lunch.”</p><p>---</p><p>Tora awoke a few hours later to a warm breeze spreading over his face and playing with his hair. He sat up slowly, anticipating the painful thudding of his head, but it had subsided to a much more tolerable dull ache at the base of his skull.</p><p>He blinked and looked around the room, eyes searching for her. Finally, he could make out her long ponytail being tossed around in the wind from where she was sitting in the big swivel chair.</p><p>He pressed himself out of bed and winced at the aches that twinged through his muscles. Slowly he made his way to the open patio doors. “Room for one more?” he asked, his voice still rough with sleep.</p><p>Poppy closed the book she was reading and pushed some stray hairs away from her eyes. She smiled brightly up at him.</p><p>“Always.” She pulled her knees up to her chest and patted the space next to her.</p><p>Tora curled his big body around Poppy, winding his arms tightly across her and laying his head on her shoulder. He closed his eyes and sighed; he felt like he could finally <em>breathe </em>out here, the congestion in his nose broken up by the ocean breeze.</p><p>“Feels nice out here,” he murmured into her neck.</p><p>“Mmmhmm,” she agreed and ran a hand through his hair. “I did a little Googling while you were sleeping and it said that salty air is good for the respiratory system, so I left the doors open for you.”</p><p>He dropped a kiss on her shoulder. “Thanks, kid.”</p><p>“Of course. I want you to feel better.”</p><p>They sat in silence for a moment, gazing out at the turquoise lagoon, the sun-flecked waves licking at the wooden staircase. Three small fish flitted by just under the surface and he smiled.</p><p>Poppy leaned back into Tora, one of her hands rustling at the pages her book, trying to keep her place.</p><p>“Brought one of ya pervy books on our honeymoon?” he teased.</p><p>“No!” she laughed. “You’re all the perv I can handle. I got this one a couple of weeks ago. It’s called <em>Mexican Gothic</em>. It’s supposed to be some kind of mystery horror story. I like it so far.”</p><p>Tora’s eyebrows quirked up at that. “You? <em>You </em>picked up somethin’ scary?” he asked, fingering the cover of the dark green hardback in her hands.</p><p>“I don’t <em>only </em>read smut, Tora,” she smirked. “I just… thought I’d try something new.”</p><p>“Hmmpf.”</p><p>He was quiet for a couple of beats, enjoying the warmth of the sun and her body. His fever must have broken.</p><p>“Would ya read it to me?” he asked.</p><p>Poppy blinked at him. “Really?”</p><p>“Yeah. Ain’t no Pride ‘n Pineapple, but I’ll listen. I like hearin’ ya voice.”</p><p>She smiled and snuggled closer into him. “Okay. I’m not too far in, so I’ll just start from the beginning. That way you know what’s going on.”</p><p>Tora rested his chin on top of her head and silently reveled in the feel of her against him, the vibrations of her voice resonating from inside her, buzzing against his bare chest as she began to read.</p><p>
  <em>“’The parties at the Tuñóns’ house always ended unquestionably late, and since the hosts enjoyed costume parties in particular…’”</em>
</p><p>---</p><p>Later in the evening, Poppy returned from the Lagoon Restaurant with a tote bag and a large wooden bowl covered in cellophane. Without saying a word, she grabbed her pink fleece blanket from her luggage and spread it out on the floor.</p><p>Then she began to unpack the bag, setting out coconut shell bowls, utensils, a large thermos and a box of cold medicine on the blanket. Tora looked at her curiously as he took a seat beside her.</p><p>“S’all this, Bobby?” he asked.</p><p>“I thought we could have an indoor picnic,” she told him as she pulled the foggy plastic from the lip of the wood bowl. It looked like there was some sort of stew inside. “When I told Emori you were sick, he went home and asked his wife to make up a batch of her homemade chicken soup for us. They also sent along some kava to help you sleep.”</p><p>Holy hell.</p><p>Poppy had told him about the reputation of Fijians long before they’d traveled to the island; they were warm, welcoming people who treated everyone they came across with friendship and hospitality. But <em>this</em>?</p><p>This was too much.</p><p>“Fuck,” he breathed, his eyes roaming over the results of Emori and his wife’s kindness. “We gotta do somethin’ for ‘em.”</p><p>She smiled over at him. “I said the same thing. And you know what he told me?”</p><p>Tora shook his head.</p><p>“’Here’s something you can do for me: enjoy the rest of your honeymoon, Miss Poppy. And tell your husband all I want in return is for him to feel better.’”</p><p> <em>---</em></p><p>The next day was their last day.</p><p>There was still some pressure and congestion in his head when Tora woke up, but thanks to the kava, he’d slept deeply through most of the night. He felt energized for the first time in 24 hours and though his feisty little wife might try to fight him on it, he wanted to take one last walk on the beach with Poppy before they left in the morning.</p><p>After they’d gotten dressed and Tora popped some DayQuil, they washed Emori’s dishes and utensils as best as they could in the bathroom sink and then brought everything to the Lagoon Restaurant.</p><p>When they finished their buffet breakfast, Poppy asked their server if Emori was working.</p><p>“No, I’m sorry, he has the day off,” the waitress said. “I can reach out to him if you nee-“</p><p>“Oh no, that’s okay,” Poppy waved her hand dismissively. “We were just wanting to return his dishes to him. Is it all right if we leave them here with you?”</p><p>“Of course, I’ll make sure he gets them.”</p><p>They paid their check and as they left the building, Tora looped an arm around Poppy’s shoulders.</p><p>“Wish we’d gotten to thank Emori,” he told her. “Feels kinda bad leavin’ without saying goodbye.”</p><p>“Well… actually, we <em>did </em>say goodbye,” Poppy told him. “Before we left the bungalow, when you were blowing your nose in the bathroom, I wrote him and his wife a thank you note on the back of my tattoo drawing and put it in the tote bag.”</p><p>Fucking Bobby, always coming through and making the most out of every situation.</p><p>Tora dropped a kiss on the top of her head. “Good thinkin’, kid.”</p><p>---</p><p>That evening, as the sun was setting and night was stretching over the island like a warm, dark blanket, Tora and Poppy walked hand in hand down one of the lagoon beaches for the last time.</p><p>As they made their way barefoot through ankle-deep water, Tora was reminded of their first time at the beach together back home. Asking her that one question in the surf had led them here, to another beach, a different country. Their whole lives were stretched out endlessly in front of them, full of beaches they’d never seen, people they had yet to meet, the things they’d never done.</p><p>But they would.</p><p>Until then, he was satisfied enough to return home with Poppy, pick up Callum and visit with his brother; Tora couldn’t even begin to think how he could possibly thank Quincey for everything he’d done, but he would try.</p><p>Tora released Poppy’s hand and walked a few feet inland, away from the ocean’s edge. Poppy followed him and watched as he pulled Quincey on a stick from his pocket. She giggled as he stuck the stick into the sand and covered it until only the paper doll was visible.</p><p>“It <em>does</em> fuckin’ look like he’s buried in the sand,” Tora muttered as he pulled his cell phone from his pocket. He snapped a photo and typed a quick caption before emailing it to his brother.</p><p>
  <em>thanks Quince</em>
</p><p>The resort’s wifi didn’t quite reach this far down the beach. Oh, well. Quincey would get it later once Tora had signal.</p><p>“You’re sweet,” Poppy said as Tora stooped to pluck the paper head from the ground. An orange flickering from a nearby firepit caught his eye and he smirked at Poppy as he made his way over to it.</p><p>He held Quincey on a stick just over the fluttering flames and took a picture.</p><p>“Oh my gosh, Tora! I’m glad to see you’re feeling better,” Poppy cackled beside him. “You’re terrible!”</p><p>“Thought I was sweet,” he sniffed as he stuffed the doll back into his pocket.</p><p>“Well, that was <em>before </em>you…” Poppy trailed off, her mind catching on something. “Oh! When we get back to the room, we should take a picture holding him over a toilet.”</p><p>Tora’s eyes widened. “You fuckin’ sadistic woman. I love ya.”</p><p>---</p><p>As Tora hunched over the toilet in the bathroom of their bungalow, Quincey on a stick pinched between two fingers in one hand and his cell phone angled for a picture in the other, his phone beeped.</p><p>It was an email from Quincey.</p><p>
  <em>You’re very welcome booboo, but what the HELL is wrong with my face? Why am I all wrinkly? I look like I aged 20 YEARS in your luggage! You heathen. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Anyway, Cal says hi and to not hurry back. He’s living his best life right now. </em>
</p><p>Attached to the email was a photo of the Cavapoo wrapped in a small, leopard print robe identical to one Quincey owned.</p><p>Tora snorted.</p><p>Jesus fucking Christ. Poppy was going to lose her damn mind.</p><p>Before Tora could leave the bathroom to show Poppy the picture, she was bustling into the room with two fluffy folded towels in her arms. She set them down on the counter and then grinned at him before tugging her shirt over her head.</p><p>The photo of Callum forgotten, Tora watched as she proceeded to strip in front of him; he marveled in silent awe at her curves as they were revealed to him. He knew every swell of her body, every dip, line and mark and without fail, his heart <em>still </em>thumped hard in his chest every time he saw her naked.</p><p>She was two sides of the same coin; familiar yet somehow new, all at once.</p><p>When she was completely nude, Poppy moved across the tiled floor to the frosted glass wall and slid the door open.</p><p>“Are you coming?” she asked before stepping inside.</p><p>Fuck, like she could stop him.</p><p>Tora left his clothes in a trail behind him as he approached the open door. Poppy had moved the bamboo bench directly under one of the showerheads and was adjusting the water temperature when he walked in.</p><p>He closed the door behind him and quietly moved toward her. Poppy spun around and pushed her wet hair from her eyes before pointing at the teak bench. “Sit down and face that way,” she said, pointing to the opposite end of the shower room.</p><p>Tora smirked; the woman’s bossiness knew no bounds. And neither did his willingness to listen to her.</p><p>He perched himself on the bench and waited. The spray of warm water beat down directly onto his back and he closed his eyes and sighed; between that and the accumulating steam, his body already felt better, relieved of the muscle aches and sinus pressure that it was carrying.</p><p>He heard Poppy’s tiny feet slapping on the tile as she walked around behind him and then the spray of water aimed higher, soaking the crown of his head.</p><p>The smell of shampoo permeated the air and then Poppy’s hands were running through his hair, gently massaging his scalp as she worked the shampoo into a lather.</p><p>“Mmm,” he moaned and leaned into her touch. Her wet breasts were pressed against his right arm and shoulder; every time she moved, he could feel her hard nipples digging into his skin.</p><p>“How’s that feel?” Poppy murmured.</p><p>Tora tilted his head and cracked an eye open to look at her. “Sexy as hell,” he answered and reached up to cup her breast.</p><p>“I meant the water temperature, you perv,” she smiled and dipped his head back slightly to run her fingers over his hairline.</p><p>“S’nice, Bobby,” he said. And he meant it. He loved being in a hot, wet room with his wife, her little hands running through his hair and over his shoulders.</p><p>“Good. When I was little and came down with a cold, Granny would wash my hair in the sink. It always felt good, so I thought I’d do it for you.” Poppy began wringing the shampoo out of his hair; the suds and excess water hit the floor with a loud smack.</p><p>“You’re a little too tall for the sink to be comfortable,” she giggled. “Then I thought about the bath, but we can’t fully submerge our tattoos for at least three weeks and I couldn’t find any of that Tatu-Derm stuff, so here we are.”</p><p>“Hmmpf, yer cute,” he said, blindly reaching his hand out to pinch her cheek. When his fingers made contact with her face, he heard her laugh and then she jerked away from him.</p><p>“You know, for someone who’s sick, you’re sure not acting like it. You’re not faking, are you?”</p><p>He smirked and reached up to grab her face again.</p><p>“Ack! Keep your hands to yourself or I’ll squirt soap in your eyes.”</p><p>Tora clasped his hands in his lap and let her tilt his head back and forth as she saturated his hair with conditioner. He sat quietly for a moment, reveling in the steam, the soft patter of water against the tile, the feel of her body molding to his, her little fingers working the soap into the ends of his hair.</p><p>Outside of their bungalow, there was a whole world they’d spent the last week exploring. They’d seen and done so many new things, but being in this glass room with his wife, naked, wet and warm while she washed his hair the way her granny had taught her…</p><p><em>This </em>was his favorite part.</p><p>He sat a few moments more under the showerhead while she rinsed the conditioner from his hair. Then her hands were on his shoulders and her lips were pressing a kiss to his cheek.</p><p>“All done,” she said. “Why don’t you dry off and go get comfy in bed? I’m going to take a quick shower. That way I don’t have to do it in the morning before we leave.”</p><p>“Can I stay in here with you ‘til ya done?” he asked as he stood from the bench. He wasn’t ready to go to bed yet; he wanted to stay in their bubble for a little longer.</p><p>“Sure, handsome,” she smiled.</p><p>---</p><p>Their returning flight left early the next morning and as soon as they settled into their seats, they cuddled beneath Poppy’s blanket and slept for several hours.</p><p>They had another layover in Thailand and when they entered the airport, Tora’s eyes roamed over the crowd, the line for the restroom, the bar where they shared a meal with Nora.</p><p>“I don’t think she’s here, tiger,” Poppy said from beside him.</p><p>He smirked down at her. “Just wanted to see if I could change her mind about elopin’ with me.”</p><p>Poppy giggled. “We can always call her when we get home, you know? I’m sure she’d like that.”</p><p>“Yeah, that’d be nice.”</p><p>They had an hour and a half before their flight to Tokyo, so they found a quiet corner with a couple of overstuffed chairs and lounged there while Poppy read more of her book to Tora. They grabbed dinner at a sandwich shop and then waited in line to board the plane that would take them home.</p><p>---</p><p>“I love it, but you could’ve at least <em>smiled</em>, honey,” Quincey said as he scrolled through their vacation pictures on Poppy’s phone. “Who knew you’d look so good with flowers in your hair? Why did we never do this before?”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes as he brushed past his brother in the kitchen. After their long trip home, Quincey had insisted on driving the full two hours to them to drop Callum off. He’d also brought along a large box of clothes and toys the dog had accumulated in the ten days he’d spent with “Uncle Quincey.”</p><p>Tora carried the box of shit into the living room and shoved it in the corner. As he returned to the kitchen, Poppy came down the stairs carrying Callum in her arms like a baby.</p><p>He ruffled one of the dog’s floppy ears. “Missed ya, punk.”</p><p>“Okay, I’ve been through the pictures on Poppy’s phone at least twice. Tora, where’s your phone?” Quincey asked from his perch at the kitchen island.</p><p>Tora plucked his phone from his back pocket and slid it across the counter to the blonde man. “Knock yerself out, princess.” He turned to Poppy and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Gonna go finish unpacking, sweetheart.”</p><p>“Okay, I’ll get to my things when Quincey leaves.” She smiled up at him and crossed the room into the kitchen, where she set Cal down before planting herself on the barstool beside Quincey.</p><p>Tora had never been one to overstuff his luggage with more than what he needed, so he managed to unpack quickly. He carried his bag down the hall to the bathroom and as he dumped his dirty clothes into the hamper, he could faintly hear the voice of his brother.</p><p>“So honey, how was your trip? I’ll never get much out of that grumpy tiger, so I’m relying on you for all the details. Did you have fun? How was the beach? Oh! How many times did you guys have sex?”</p><p>“Oh my god, Quincey!” Tora heard his wife gasp and he smirked as he imagined her tiny hand reaching out to swat at Quincey. “That is not… I’m not going to tell you that.”</p><p>He heard Quincey sigh. “Okay, okay, fair. But what about the rest of it?”</p><p>“Honestly… it was <em>perfect</em>,” Poppy said.</p><p>Tora listened as she told his brother about meeting Dan and Nora on their first flight to Thailand and though their following flight to Fiji was twelve hours, it felt like no time at all because she and Tora had played games and watched movies together.</p><p>She told him about Tora giving her a piggyback ride to the resort and buying jewelry from a local vendor. She described the bungalow, swimming in the lagoon and walking through the Garden of the Sleeping Giant with him. How Tora ended up making her flower crown because he was so good at it.</p><p>Trying new food and kava for the first time. Getting their tattoos. Watching the fire show on the beach. Tora’s eyebrows furrowed together as she told Quincey they decided to trade snorkeling and hiking to the waterfall for reading in the bungalow and having an indoor picnic with homemade food from a local they’d befriended.</p><p>Not one word about sitting separately on their first flight or their taxi breaking down. <em>Nothing</em> about him being sick. The way she told the story, it was like none of it happened. Like it didn’t matter.</p><p>Warmth spread through Tora’s chest as he realized that to her, it <em>didn’t.</em></p><p>He thought back to each of those incidents on the trip, the things he’d been so convinced had doomed their vacation before it even started. She’d been so agreeable, going with the flow and embracing all the changes in their plans. Taking care of him when he got sick and not blaming him, not complaining once.</p><p><em>Perfect</em>, she’d told Quincey.</p><p>It was. It really was.</p><p>He’d been crazy to think it was anything less than.</p><p>“That <em>sounds </em>perfect, honey,” his brother sighed dreamily.</p><p>As Tora retreated down the hall, his shoulders shook with silent laughter as he heard Quincey ask “Umm… Poppy. <em>Why </em>is there a picture of me being dangled over a <em>toilet?</em>”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Six Weeks Later </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p> <strong> <em>Poppy</em> </strong></p><p>---</p><p>“Mrs. Editor, are you listening to me?” Quincey’s voice asked in her ear.</p><p>Poppy blinked and sat up straighter on her bed. “Yeah, yeah, Quincey, sorry,” she mumbled into the phone and ran a hand over her face. “I’m here. Just a little tired.”</p><p>“Okay. I was just saying that Camila, you know, the translator? Last night we were drinking wine while we were going through the pirate book and she was telling me all of these fabulous, <em>dirty</em> words in Spanish. <em>Calocha</em> is my favorite<em>. </em>It means, ‘heat in the pu-“</p><p>Poppy settled back into the pillows as Quincey continued to ramble in her ear. Normally she would have been laughing along with him, but she was having trouble focusing. She was just so <em>tired </em>lately.</p><p>She shifted onto her side and winced as her breast pressed into the mattress. They’d been tender the past week or so and she wished she’d just start her period already. Being on vacation and then jumping back into work so soon after getting home must have confused her body a bit; it was normally never this late.</p><p>“Wifey, <em>hellooooo</em>?” Quincey sang.</p><p>“Mmm? Sorry, Quince, I’m here.”</p><p>“Poppy, are you okay? You seem distracted.”</p><p>“Um, yeah, I’m okay. I think I’m still recovering from our vacation,” she said on a light laugh.</p><p>“Well, come back to Narin, honey! You’re not on Fiji time anymore,” Quincey chuckled.</p><p>Poppy shot up on the bed, eyes wide.</p><p>
  <em>Fiji time. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Time zone. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>They’d been in a different time zone. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>5:00 pm in Fiji is not the same as 5:00 pm in Bōken, Pops. </em>
</p><p>But… she’d still been <em>taking </em>the pill. Every day. Could it really make that much of a difference? Could she actually be…</p><p>“Um, Quincey, I’m so sorry, but I have to go,” Poppy said as she scooted off the bed. “Can I call you tomorrow?”</p><p>“Oh, s-sure, honey. Is everything okay?” he asked.</p><p>“Yeah, everything will be fine,” she told him as she yanked a pair of shoes out from the closet and stuffed her feet into them.</p><p>
  <em>No matter what happens, everything will be fine. </em>
</p><p>Poppy hung up with Quincey and marched down the hall. She forced herself to take the steps slowly, one at a time. The last thing she needed right now was to fall.</p><p>As she stepped into the living room, Tora called to her from the couch, where he was stretched out watching tv with Callum.</p><p>“Whatcha doin’, Bobby?”</p><p>“Um, I’m going to run to the store really quick,” she said, snatching her purse off the kitchen counter. “Do you need anything? Want me to pick up some more strawberry juice?”</p><p>“Sure, sweetheart. Drive safe, okay?”</p><p>Poppy smiled over at him. Her heart thumped hard in her chest.  </p><p>“I will. Be right back.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Shoutout to my best friend Gaby for introducing me to the word "calocha". It will live forever in my heart LOL ❤❤</p><p>Also, for anyone who's interested or maybe looking for something new to read, the book Poppy reads out loud to Tora is "Mexican Gothic" by Silvia Moreno-Garcia. I'm currently a chapter or two in and I'm loving it so far.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. We're Hoping It's a Dinosaur - Announcement</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora prepare to be parents. </p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi guys! I'm SO EXCITED to finally get the first part of the pregnancy arc out! </p><p>I want to preface this storyline first by saying that I do not have any children of my own (yet) and while I had the most AMAZING moms holding my hand through this (looking at you, CopyPastel and OneAndOnlyTako!) I may not end up portraying everything as accurately as I'd have hoped. In no way do I mean to provide misinformation, nor is it my intention to abuse or mistreat a fictional newborn baby LOL. I did days of research before uploading this and I know I'll be doing even more for the next two parts. I want these stories to be as true to real life as possible!</p><p>With that being said, I have several of you to thank for requesting Poppy and Tora's pregnancy:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Audrey, RaquelSousa, Spotlightgirlontherun, Rollie89, Foxesinboxes, and Mackgurl2020.</p><p>Special shout outs to BegoniaRex, CopyPastel and OneAndOnlyTako for being my amazing beta readers. And also to all the ladies in our PWWSTS channel, I love chatting with you every day!</p><p>I hope you all enjoy reading about Poppy and Tora's first pregnancy! (Not gonna lie, I bawled off and on ALL. DAY. as I wrote this lol.)</p><p>Thank you all so much for STILL being here for Stages. It's coming close to the end and it would never have gotten this far without you &lt;3</p><p>Love you all and see you soon, </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>P.S. Screaming THANK YOU to Zoety for approaching me about offering an audio option for my fanfiction. I now have an audio story podcast where you can listen to me read my works for Midnight Poppy Land. You can tune in to "bREADcrumbs: reading with pb&amp;c" here:</p><p>https://anchor.fm/breadcrumbs-pbc</p><p>I'm currently trying to figure out the best way to embed the media onto AO3 as well, so I'll keep you posted when that happens :) </p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Out on the ocean sailing away,</p><p>I can hardly wait to see you come of age</p><p>But I guess we’ll both</p><p>Just have to be patient”</p><p>-John Lennon, “Beautiful Boy (Darling Boy)”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“C’mere, punk,” Tora said from where he laid flat on the couch and stretched his long arms out to Callum. The dog, still panting from their light jog in the park, slowly wandered over to him and allowed Tora to heave him upwards onto his stomach.</p><p>Tora gripped the Cavapoo under his front legs and held him up straight so he could look into his dark brown eyes.</p><p>“Whaddya think’s goin’ on with your mom?” he asked Cal. “She say anythin’ to ya? She mad at me?”</p><p>Callum cocked his head to the side, gazing intently at Tora’s face. He then let out a long, whining yawn and began wriggling around in Tora’s grasp. He pulled his hands away from the Cavapoo and watched as Callum turned his back on him and then plopped down across his abs. The dog huffed out a deep, contented breath.</p><p>Tora’s eyebrows furrowed together. “Fine,” he grumbled. “See if I keep givin’ ya ham when she’s not lookin’.”</p><p>Tora sighed and ran a hand through the dog’s thick, curly fur. For the past twenty-four hours, Poppy had been acting so<em> strangely</em>. Actually, if he thought about it, she’d really not been normal for several weeks now. She just seemed worn down, not her usual, chipper self.</p><p>He wasn’t surprised at all when she’d jumped right back into work upon their return from Fiji; she was constantly tied up on the phone with clients and attended online meetings at all hours of the day and night.</p><p>Since they’d been home, it wasn’t out of the ordinary for Tora to find her passed out on the couch after dinner, the tv show she'd been watching playing at a low volume in the background. That was the other thing: it was as if she was too tired to even <em>read</em> anymore, her preferred source of entertainment coming from Netflix instead.</p><p>And last week, when she’d finally felt energized enough to have sex with him, she’d winced as Tora reached out and palmed one of her breasts. Poppy waved it off as stress and said that she was getting ready to start her period. She then released a jaw-cracking yawn and asked if they could just go to sleep instead. It wasn’t ten minutes after her head hit the pillow that she was snoring softly beside him.</p><p>Tora wouldn’t deny that he was worried, especially with how quickly she’d left the house last night to run to the store. It wasn’t like her to whirl out the door without a goodbye kiss or an <em>I love you </em>thrown over her shoulder at him.</p><p>He wasn’t sure if he’d done something to piss her off or if it was the stress of returning to her demanding job. He could recall a time a few months before their wedding when her stress tank had reached its capacity and then overflowed. With wedding planning and a jumbled overtime work schedule, she was on the phone constantly. And when she didn’t have her cell phone glued to her ear, she was sleeping.  </p><p>By the time she’d reached her limit, all he could do was watch and become insanely turned on as she’d landed a hell of a punch on her piece of shit ex-boyfriend. They’d proceeded to go home and had the best sex of his entire life.</p><p>But this time felt different. Like maybe she was sick? Sick of him?</p><p>Whatever it was, he knew something was wrong and he’d been a nervous wreck, checking his phone every few minutes and staring at the front door, waiting for her to return.</p><p>When she finally came back an hour later, it was with a small brown bag and a six pack of canned strawberry juice clenched in her hands. Without saying so much as two words to him, she’d popped one of the cans free and handed it to him before hustling upstairs with the bag and the rest of the juice in tow.</p><p>Poppy had closed herself up in the bathroom and he let fifteen agonizing minutes go by before he finally walked up the stairs after her.</p><p>He’d rapped lightly on the bathroom door and asked if she needed anything. Tora almost didn’t recognize the voice that answered him from the other side of the door. It sounded nothing like his wife; it was warbled and small, halfway between a sob and a laugh.</p><p>“I- um, no. I don’t need anything,” Poppy had tried to reassure him, but her tone left him unconvinced.</p><p>“Are ya <em>sure</em> yer okay, sweetheart?” he pressed.</p><p>“Y-yeah. I’m okay. I’ll be out in a bit.”</p><p>But she wasn’t. Poppy didn’t emerge for at least another two hours and she didn’t know it, but for a majority of that time Tora had laid stretched out in front of the bathroom door, wanting to be nearby if she needed <em>anything a</em>t all. She’d made little noise: she flushed the toilet a couple of times and either cried or laughed off and on. The sounds were too muffled for him to tell.</p><p>After an hour and a half had passed with no sign of her leaving the room any time soon, he finally willed himself to get up. She clearly wanted space and he was going to give it to her. Tora knocked quietly on the door one more time.</p><p>“Poppylan, goin’ to bed. Still doin’ okay?”</p><p>This time when she responded, she sounded a little more like herself. “Yeah, I’ll be out soon.”</p><p>“Kay. Love ya.”</p><p>He thought he’d heard a smile in her voice when she replied, “I love you, too.”</p><p>When she slipped into bed beside him later that night, Tora immediately reached out and clutched her tightly to his chest. He could feel Poppy’s heart hammering away like a hummingbird trapped behind her ribs and he frowned.</p><p>“Sure ya ain’t sick, Bobby?” he asked. He inhaled the sweet, flowery scent of her shampoo before dropping a kiss on the top of her head.</p><p>“Yeah, I’m fine,” she murmured, already sounding close to sleep. “Just… woman stuff.”</p><p>Tora had tossed and turned for most of the night, desperately waiting to feel comforted by her words. But he never did.</p><p>And when Poppy flitted out of the house this morning, seemingly propelled forward by her ponytail swinging wildly behind her and without much more of an explanation than “I’m going shopping,” Tora didn’t feel any better.</p><p>In an attempt to keep his mind off of it, he’d taken Callum on a jog through his favorite park. It had helped a bit, being able to instead fill his brain with the sounds of the heavy thudding of his shoes on the asphalt, the steady beating of his heart in his ears and the light, metal tinkling of Cal’s dog tag against the leash hook.</p><p>The relief didn’t last long.</p><p>As soon as they’d returned to an apartment without Poppy in it, Tora felt the heaviness of his unease settle back down on him. Unable to support the weight of it, he’d flopped onto the couch and now here he was, trying to coax answers out of his fucking Cavapoo.</p><p>Tora shifted slightly on the couch, trying to quiet the persistent humming of concern in his brain. He closed his eyes against the worry, the confusion and even <em>anger </em>that threatened to roll over him like a tidal wave.</p><p>When he’d broken his foot last year, wasn’t <em>she </em>the one who harped on how fucking important communication was?</p><p><em>"What are you doing?”</em> she’d screamed at him on their balcony. <em>“We’re supposed to be moving forward. Why won’t you talk to me? Why do you have to be so stubborn?!”</em></p><p>Why wouldn’t <em>she</em> tell <em>him</em> what was really wrong? She had to know by now that she could tell him anything; he could take it. And most of all, he <em>wanted</em> to hear it, no matter what it was.</p><p>Tora’s eyes flitted open as he recalled what Julia had said to him in their session last week: <em>“You need to be curious, Tora. There is a reason and logic alone won’t explain it.”</em></p><p>She’d been referring to determining the trigger for one of his more recent night terrors, but her words rang just as true for him now. He’d given Poppy space, had asked her countless times if she was okay and still had no answers. At least, no answers that helped him sleep any better at night.</p><p>Tora jolted upright on the couch as he heard the jingling of keys at the front door. He set Callum down on the floor and followed after the dog as he pranced into the kitchen. Tora had made up his mind. As soon as she came through that door, they were going to talk and Poppy was going to be honest with him.   </p><p>He was leaning against the kitchen island when she flounced into the room with two large, plastic bags dangling from her arms. The words <em>Adare City Books</em> were stretched across them in bold, navy blue lettering.  </p><p>“Hi, baby!” she cooed and reached a hand down to pet Callum, who was jumping excitedly at her legs.</p><p>When Poppy finally turned and met Tora’s eyes, she smiled brightly at him.</p><p>“Hi, handsome,” she said as she paused in front of him and tilted her head up expectantly.</p><p>Tora’s eyebrows knitted together as he stooped down to plant a kiss on her lips. She seemed… <em>normal. </em>For the first time in days… maybe weeks?</p><p>“Bobby,” he said firmly as he pulled away from her, “we gotta talk.”</p><p>“You’re right,” she nodded. “We do. Um, why don’t you go sit down and wait for me in the living room? I’ll be right back and then we can talk.”</p><p>Hmmpf. Maybe this was going to be easier than he thought.</p><p>“Yer comin’ <em>right</em> back down?” Tora asked. He wasn’t about to let her go into full on lockdown mode in their bathroom again.</p><p>“Yup. I just want to put these away first,” she said, slightly lifting the two shopping bags into the air.</p><p>“Kay. Be on the couch.”</p><p>Tora watched with mild bewilderment as Poppy practically bounced up the steps. It was like she’d come back a completely different person. Like the past few weeks hadn’t completely drained her, like the past twenty-four hours had never even happened.</p><p>
  <em>What the fuck?</em>
</p><p>He settled himself on the couch and absentmindedly rubbed at Callum’s back when the dog jumped up onto the cushion beside him. Christ, had he <em>ever </em>been this nervous to talk to Poppy before? He couldn’t honestly think of one time. Not even when he’d told her he was in the mafia, all those years ago.</p><p>Of course, that hadn’t been planned. It was more of an outburst, not something he’d sat on for days or weeks. Tora had wanted to confess to Poppy a million times, but clan-related thoughts had drifted so easily from his mind whenever he was around her. He huffed at himself; he’d been so naïve then, thinking he could have ever kept those two parts of his life separate.</p><p>Fuck, they weren’t even separate <em>now. </em>There was still one thing that tied him to his past life and he carried it with him every day.</p><p>Tora rubbed at the tattoo on his neck; it didn’t feel any different from his untainted skin, but just <em>knowing</em> the ink was still there made his gut feel as though it was filled with stones.</p><p>Once he had a little more money saved up, he was getting the thing fucking lasered off.</p><p>
  <em>Leave no trace.</em>
</p><p>As Tora flipped these words around in his brain, he winced as they began to broil and hiss in a tone of voice that didn’t sound unlike his twisted pseudo father.</p><p>
  <em>Leave no trace. Leave no trace. Leave no trace.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Again, Tora."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"This one is a heavy bleeder."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I don't care if it takes you all night, I want you to clean up every last drop."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Don't fuck this up, son."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Leave no trace."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Fuck. </em>
</p><p>When was the last time he’d let his guard down enough to allow Vincent’s voice to creep back into his head? Usually he only heard it in his nightmares while he slept and wasn’t actively guarding himself against it.</p><p>So why the sudden invasion? Why was there now a crack in his carefully crafted shield?</p><p>Tora rubbed his hand over the brand on his neck one more time before reaching down and patting Callum’s head. His fingers brushed along the edge of the dog’s corded collar and Tora stiffened.</p><p>“Here chicken, let’s get this off ya,” Tora murmured and slipped it from Callum’s neck. Tora scratched at the ring of flattened fur that was now free of the collar. Callum leaned into Tora’s touch and one of his back feet began to thump against the couch cushion.</p><p>Tora chuckled. “Feels good, huh?”</p><p>One day, he’d know the feeling, too.</p><p>A few more minutes ticked by before Poppy made her way down the stairs with a flat, square package in one hand and a small brown bag in the other. She stood in front of where he sat on the couch and beamed down at him.</p><p>Before Tora could open his mouth to speak, Poppy thrust the package into his hands. “Before you say anything… I- um, I got you something. Open it.”</p><p>Tora’s eyebrows quirked up as he studied the flat present in his hands. She’d wrapped it the same way she had the beach painting she’d made for him years ago, the canvas that now hung on his side of their bed.</p><p>Brown paper tied closed with shiny pink string.</p><p>Hmmpf.</p><p>He pinched the string between two fingers and carefully pulled it away from the paper. Tora gently tore the paper and his eyebrows knitted together at the revealed book he now held in his grasp.</p><p>It… wasn’t what he’d expected.</p><p>On the cover was an illustration of a young tiger tiptoeing on its hind legs through a soft yellow and green jungle scene. The words “<em>The Tiptoeing Tiger” </em>were printed across the middle of the picture.</p><p>Tora smirked up at Poppy. “Uh, thanks sweetheart. Ain’t a big reader, but ya know I <em>can </em>read books with no pictures in ‘em?”</p><p>Poppy giggled and gestured for the book. “I know,” she said as he handed it to her. “Look at the next one.”</p><p>Tora’s gaze drifted back down to the second book. The cover was sky blue and five illustrated hamsters stood in a line across it; some were dressed in tutus and hats, while the others held wands and cupcakes in their tiny paws. The name of the book was printed in a typewriter font just above the hamsters: <em>“This Little Hamster.”</em></p><p>“Pfft. Weird but cute,” Tora told her. He really wasn’t sure <em>what </em>he was supposed to say.</p><p>All humor left Poppy’s face as she held her hand out. “Look at the next one,” she murmured and then bit her lip.</p><p>Tora felt concern tug at his eyebrows and his mouth; they dragged downward on his face as he passed the hamster book over to Poppy.</p><p>His eyes settled on the last book.</p><p>This one was thicker, but still had a brightly colored, illustrated cover. It was yellow and had a cartoon image of a man embracing a woman plastered across it. The man was holding something in his hand, but it was too tiny for Tora to make it out right away.</p><p>Across the top, in bold blue lettering, centered in the middle of a white, spiky bubble were the words <em>“WE’RE PREGNANT! The First-Time Dad’s Pregnancy Handbook.”</em></p><p>
  <em>WE’RE PREGNANT!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>PREGNANT!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>WE’RE.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>PREGNANT.</em>
</p><p>Tora’s head snapped to the side as the words jabbed through his skull to his brain and slipped between his ribs to his heart. His wide eyes locked onto Poppy, who had been crying silently beside him.</p><p>A bubble was rapidly taking up space in his chest; it was too <em>big</em>, squeezing against his ribs, then pushing past his esophagus, forcing its way up to crush his windpipe. His throat tightened; he swallowed, his spit barely slipping over the dome of the bubble.</p><p>Tora’s tongue felt thick, too large for his mouth. “Y- ya pr…” he trailed off. He knew what he wanted to say but he couldn’t get the words to move past his lips.</p><p>Poppy’s head bobbed, tears leaking from her big brown eyes as she blinked at him. “Y-yeah,” she choked out around a quavering smile. “I took the tests last night,” she said and passed him the little brown bag that she’d kept tightly grasped in her hand.</p><p>Tora took the crinkled bag from her and stuck one hand inside. He pulled out a Ziplock bag containing two pregnancy tests; both tiny, digital screens on the white sticks read <strong>Pregnant</strong>.</p><p>“Pregnant,” Tora whispered, trying the word out on his tongue. “Yer pregnant,” he said, a little louder this time.</p><p>A small, warm wave of relief rolled through his chest, tickling at the rounded sides of the bubble. He’d been so worried about her; the fatigue, the inability to stay focused. Her dad had died of cancer and he’d found himself thinking about that a<em> lot </em>the past few weeks.</p><p>Shit, he’d even thought it was something that <em>he’d </em>done to her. Pissed her off or pushed her away to the point that she was physically tired of him.</p><p>But she was pregnant. With his baby.</p><p>It was the <em>best </em>possible thing she could be.</p><p>
  <em>This was the best.</em>
</p><p>“Yeah, Tora. I’m pregnant,” Poppy replied. “Is that- um, are you happy?”</p><p>
  <em>Happy.</em>
</p><p><em>That’s </em>what it was. The bubble, threatening to burst from his insides out.</p><p>He was bursting with <em>happiness.</em></p><p>Tora blinked up at her. There were no words to possibly describe how much this meant to him, so he didn’t speak.</p><p>“I know we said we wanted kids, but I didn’t think it would be happening this soon,” Poppy began to ramble. “I was taking my pill at the same time every day and forgot about the time difference in Fiji. And you weren’t wearing a condom and…” she sighed.</p><p>“We’re gonna be parents, Tora. Oh gosh, please say something.”</p><p>Tora set the book and pregnancy tests on the end table before standing. He moved in front of Poppy and stared down into her eyes. He reached out and brushed a thumb across her cheek.</p><p>“Yer pregnant,” he whispered.</p><p>Her watery eyes stared back at him. “Yeah.”</p><p>“With my baby. <em>Our </em>baby.”</p><p>A small smile crept across her lips as she nodded. “Uh huh.”</p><p>“Yer gonna be a mom.”</p><p>“Mmmhmm.”</p><p>The bubble pushed against his eyes, causing tears to spring forward. He squinted hard against them; he wanted to be able to see her.</p><p>“And- And I…” Tora paused. He <em>needed</em> her to say the next words, needed her confirmation that it was real.</p><p>Poppy wiped at the fresh tears streaming down her face. “Yeah. Yeah, Tora. You’re gonna be a dad.”</p><p>
  <em>A dad.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dad.</em>
</p><p>In that moment, the bubble broke. A tear slipped down his cheek and he sucked in a deep breath as he curled his arms around his wife; this tiny, perfect woman who was carrying his tiny, perfect baby.</p><p>“Christ, Bobby,” he choked out. He wanted to hold her closer, feel every inch of her pressed against him. “Christ, c-can I pick you up? Don’t wanna hurt ya.”</p><p>Poppy sniffed and giggled at him. “You can pick me up. You won’t hurt me.”</p><p>Tora bent at his knees and lowered his hands to cup Poppy just beneath her bottom. He gently lifted her from the ground and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He hugged her close and buried his face in her neck.</p><p>He held her there quietly for a moment, his legs and hips pivoting as he slowly swayed them back and forth.</p><p>“I’m so fuckin’ <em>happy</em>,” he finally said.</p><p>“You are? Really?”</p><p>“Yeah, sweetheart. I really am.”</p><p>“I know we weren’t really planning on this happening right now but…”</p><p>Tora drew his head back to look into her eyes. “Never mattered to me when it happened,” he assured her. “I was <em>always</em> gonna be happy.”</p><p>Poppy released a deep breath and laid her head against his shoulder; with her left hand, she traced her fingers over his collarbone, then drew a line upward to the black brand on his neck.</p><p>He froze as he felt Vincent’s voice pricking at the back of his mind.</p><p>
  <em>"Don’t fuck this up, son.”</em>
</p><p>Jesus fucking Christ, was he going to completely… <em>ruin </em>this kid?</p><p>In nine short months, there was going a be a whole new person in his life, one even smaller than his dog that he had to somehow protect and not break at the same time. What if he did the wrong thing? What if he held it too tightly or moved the baby’s leg a certain way as he changed its diaper and he… <em>hurt</em> it? What if he said the wrong thing and his kid ended up hating him forever?</p><p>The way he hated Vincent?</p><p>What if…</p><p>Poppy’s hand left its place on his neck and it was soon replaced with the feeling of her lips pressing a soft kiss to the ink.</p><p>“I love you,” she murmured, her breath warm as it rolled across the tattoo.</p><p>And just like that, as though a switch had been flipped, Tora could no longer hear Vincent in his head. All he heard was Poppy and her words to him on their first Christmas.</p><p>
  <em>"Did you know this is meant for new parents and... their baby?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You're worried about disappointing our kids?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Then I think you're already a good dad, Tora."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"And I wouldn't want to have kids with anyone else."</em>
</p><p>They were going to be new parents. She wanted to have a baby with him.</p><p>Christ, how had she given him yet <em>another </em>reason to love her?</p><p>“I love ya too, Bobby,” he murmured back and turned his head to kiss her. “I love ya so goddamn much.”</p><p>He held her there quietly for awhile longer, content just to feel her breathing against his chest. His arms and his heart had never felt so <em>full a</em>nd in that moment, he knew he’d make it a point to hold his child as much as he or she wanted, just like this.</p><p>A few more moments ticked by before Poppy finally broke the silence. “I bought more books for the baby,” she said. “Wanna see?”</p><p>“Yeah,” he said. “They upstairs?”</p><p>“Mmmhmm.”</p><p>She wriggled a bit in his arms as though she were going to climb down, but Tora tightened his grip on her and began carrying her toward the staircase.</p><p>Poppy laughed. “Tora, what are you doing? I can walk, you know.”</p><p>“Nah,” he said as he walked them up to the second level of their apartment. “Too many stairs for a pregnant lady.”</p><p>He ducked his head to avoid her playful swat and when they reached the bedroom, he set her down carefully in the middle of the bed. Poppy rolled her eyes up at him.</p><p>“What?” he shrugged. “Needed a safe place to land. Where’s the books? I’ll grab ‘em for ya.”</p><p>“Oh, for crepe’s sake, I’m not an invalid,” Poppy huffed.</p><p>“Ya been runnin’ around all morning. Take a break and tell me where the books are at.”</p><p>“They’re in the closet,” she said, pointing to the sliding glass doors.</p><p>Tora gathered the two bags in his arms and lifted them out of the closet. They were <em>heavy</em>. Fucking Christ, just how many books had she bought?</p><p>“Poppylan,” he said as he set the bags on the bed beside her. “Ya tellin’ me you carried these heavy ass bags around all day…”</p><p>“Tora, it’s only ten in the morning…”</p><p>“… and up the stairs <em>while yer pregnant?</em> Are you outta ya goddamn mind?”</p><p>“They’re not <em>that </em>heavy. They’re just bulky,” she told him as she withdrew a couple of books from one of the bags.</p><p>Tora shook his head as he settled himself down next to her. “Gonna have to tie ya down to the damn bed, woman.”</p><p>“Sounds like fun,” she said and raised one eyebrow at him.</p><p>He smirked. “God damnit, Poppy, just show me what ya got,” he said and nodded at the pile of brightly colored children’s books.</p><p>“Here, these are my favorites,” she said and passed three over to him.</p><p>
  <em>If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. Oh, the Places You’ll Go! Goodnight, Moon. </em>
</p><p>He slowly thumbed through each of them, his eyes skimming over the cute illustrations and simply worded sentences.</p><p>“I might have gone a little overboard,” Poppy giggled as she tugged more books from the other bag. “Our baby is going to be a nerd just like its mother.”</p><p>At these words, Tora gazed up from the book he was reading and looked into her eyes. He smiled.</p><p>“Good.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>For anyone interested in the books Poppy bought for Tora and their little bean, they were:</p><p>The Tiptoeing Tiger by Philippa Leathers</p><p>This Little Hamster by Kass Reich</p><p>We're Pregnant! The First Time Dad's Pregnancy Handbook by Adrian Kulp</p><p>If You Give a Mouse a Cookie by Laura Numeroff</p><p>Oh, the Places You'll Go! by Dr. Seuss </p><p>Goodnight, Moon by Margaret Wise Brown.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. We're Hoping It's a Dinosaur- First Trimester</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora prepare to become parents. </p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm back with the first trimester and I just want to take a second and apologize profusely to Tora. I'm SO SORRY I tortured you in this chapter lol.</p><p>I have several of you to thank for requesting Poppy and Tora's pregnancy:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Audrey, RaquelSousa, Spotlightgirlontherun, Rollie89, Foxesinboxes, and Mackgurl2020.</p><p>Special shout out to the ladies in the PWWSTS chat. You're all a bunch of weirdos and you keep me going &lt;3</p><p>To CopyPastel and OneAndOnlyTako: thank you so much for being my pregnancy/baby/mama gurus! This fic would be FAR more inaccurate if you weren't so candid with your own experiences &lt;3 &lt;3</p><p>I'm also dedicating this chapter to Melanie528: I'm thinking about you, girl! &lt;3 &lt;3 &lt;3</p><p>You can now find me on Instagram under the username @peanut.butterandchelly, where I post inspo for my fics, sneak peeks and whatever feels right lol. Feel free to reach out, I'd love to chat with you!</p><p>I hope you enjoy this chapter of the pregnancy arc! I wouldn't still be writing this series if it weren't for all of you. </p><p>Love you all and see you soon, </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>First Trimester</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>When you give a pregnant hamster a muffin, she’ll ask for some French fries to go with it.</p><p>Once she has her French fries, she’ll want some soft serve chocolate ice cream to dip them in.</p><p>After she’s finished off every bit of that fucking disgusting combination, she’ll ask for a jar of pickles at two o’clock in the goddamn morning.</p><p>---</p><p>Tora cracked his eyes open and squinted at the alarm clock perched on his nightstand.</p><p>2:03 am.</p><p>So as not to jar his wife awake, he shifted carefully onto his right side and slid one arm beneath his pillow, the other instinctively stretching out into the darkness to feel Poppy. He’d been doing that lately, he noticed. He’d either fall asleep with his fingers splayed across the soft skin of her lower belly or he’d wake up in the middle of the night, reaching for her.</p><p>She didn’t have a bump just yet; she had some bloating, but the doctor said it might be closer to sixteen weeks into the pregnancy before the baby started to show. For Tora, it was enough simply knowing the baby existed, that it was <em>there, </em>healthy and growing inside his wife.</p><p>He guessed that’s why touching her belly helped him sleep; it was comforting that both he and the baby were feeling Poppy’s breaths at the same time. Nighttime had quickly become his favorite part of every day; it was the time that he felt truly connected to this tiny person they’d made.</p><p>But when Tora reached out for Poppy this time, she wasn’t there.</p><p>Tora jolted upright in the bed, his eyes scanning the room for her. At this point, it wasn’t completely abnormal for her to be missing from the king-size bed; she usually got up to pee at least once a night. But it <em>was</em> strange for Callum to have disappeared from the foot of the bed, too.</p><p>He blinked wearily around their bedroom, looking for any sign of the fluffy little punk. Nope, not there, either.</p><p>Tora swung his long legs off the mattress and crossed the room into the hallway. The bathroom door was open and the room was dark.</p><p>Where the hell was she?</p><p>As he turned his head away from the door, he saw the warm light from their kitchen glowing at the mouth of the hall. When he reached the top of the stairs, he was met with the sight of Poppy standing by the front door, bundled up in her winter coat and shoving on large, fuzzy boots. Callum sat at her feet, his tail wagging expectantly.</p><p>
  <em>What the fuck’s this little woman think she’s doing?</em>
</p><p>“Cal, I’ll be right back,” Tora heard her murmur to the dog. “I’m just going to-“</p><p>If she wasn’t taking the dog out to piss, like hell he was going to let her go anywhere else at this time of night. Especially when it had been snowing right before they’d gone to bed.</p><p>“Where the hell do ya think yer goin’, Bobby?” Tora asked as he stalked into the room and planted himself in front of her. He crossed his arms over his bare chest and glared down at his wife.</p><p>Poppy’s head snapped up at the sound of his voice. Her eyes widened and her pupils dilated, making them appear an even darker brown than usual. “Tora! Oh my gosh, you scared me! I… I didn’t mean to wake you. I was just…” she trailed off and bit her lip.</p><p>“Just what?” he asked.</p><p>“I was just going to run to Katsubō’s really quick?” she squeaked.</p><p>Tora shook his head. “Not at two o’clock in the goddamn morning with snow on the ground, yer not. Why the fuck ya goin’ to the store, anyway? I just went there today.”</p><p>It was like a switch flipped in the little hamster’s head. He watched as her eyebrows quickly pulled down into a straight line over her big brown eyes that were no longer wide with fear, but now squinted at him in anger.</p><p>“<em>I know,” </em>she said, her voice hissing out from between gritted teeth. “And you <em>forgot </em>the fucking <em>pickles. </em>Tora, I can’t stop <em>thinking a</em>bout them and I need them right <em>now</em>.”</p><p>Tora’s eyes widened; he still wasn’t quite used to hearing her curse. He wasn’t sure if it was a common side effect of being pregnant or if it was something that came with carrying <em>his </em>baby specifically.</p><p>Goddamn it. She was <em>so </em>upset.</p><p>He felt like a large stone had materialized in his chest and settled deep into his gut. He pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a large sigh.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck. </em>
</p><p>“Fuck, Poppy, I’m sorry,” he said as he felt his shoulders slumping and his entire demeanor changing.</p><p>He knew how strange, abrupt and fucking <em>intense</em> her pregnancy cravings could be; more than once he’d found himself standing in the middle of the grocery store, puzzling over lists written in her curvy handwriting that read <em>one dozen eggs, Cholula original hot sauce and Jiff’s creamy butter </em>or <em>Daisy cottage cheese, RiceSelect organic Texmati white rice and ground cinnamon.</em></p><p>He could remember now, seeing pickles on the list she’d given him that morning before he’d left for work. They’d been added to the very end, in a different color ink, as though she’d been struck by the craving hours later and grabbed the first pen she’d seen to scribble it down.</p><p>And he’d fucking forgotten them.</p><p>“C’mon, sweetheart, let’s get this off ya,” Tora said as he began unzipping her winter coat and tugging it from her tiny body.</p><p>Poppy huffed. “<em>Tora, </em>I need-“</p><p>“I know what ya need. Gonna go get it for ya. Take yer boots off and sit your cute lil’ pregnant ass down,” he told her, pointing toward one of the barstools at the kitchen island.</p><p>Poppy’s eyebrows pulled together in the middle of her forehead. “I don’t want you to have to go out to the store again. I can…”</p><p>“S’fine,” he told her as she reluctantly pulled off her boots and wandered over to the island. “My fault for forgettin’ ‘em.”</p><p>She sighed as she slid onto the barstool. “It’s not your fault. You’d just gotten off work, you were tired. If I didn’t have that meeting with Gil, I would have just gone and saved you the hassle. And now…“ she trailed off. Her bottom lip began to tremble and her eyes welled up with tears.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck. Fuck. FUCK. </em>
</p><p>Tora rubbed one hand over his face and sighed heavily; no matter how frequent of a habit it’d become, he still <em>hated s</em>eeing her cry. “Bobby, s’okay. Any particular kind of pickles ya want?”</p><p>She blinked her big, watery eyes at him. “Um, they’re Claussen dill pickle spears. Dark green lid, red label. It should be a twenty-four ounce jar. Do you want me to write it down for you?”</p><p>Tora shook his head. Having something to remember, to focus on would help keep him awake while he trekked out to the store.</p><p>“Nah, I got it.”</p><p>He moved to the entry way closet and plucked out a hoodie and his winter coat from their hangers. He slipped them both on, then stuffed his feet into his winter boots. Callum danced around Tora’s feet as he approached Poppy. He looked down at the dog, who was gazing up at him eagerly.</p><p>“Sorry, punk. Can’t come. Need ya to keep an eye on yer mom.”</p><p>Tora dropped his head and planted a kiss on Poppy’s forehead. “Claussen, right?” he asked.</p><p>She nodded. “Yeah.” The next thing he knew, her tiny hands had slid up the sides of his face and drawn him back down until he was eye level with her. She pressed a long, firm kiss to his lips and smiled when she finally broke away from him.</p><p>“Thanks, handsome. Drive safe, okay?”</p><p>He smirked. “I’ll do whatever ya want if you keep kissin’ me like that.”</p><p>Poppy cocked an eyebrow at him. “We’ll see.”</p><p>Tora gave her hand a quick squeeze and trailed his fingers across her lower belly before he headed toward the door.</p><p>“Love ya, kid. Be right back.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <em>Claussen’s dill pickle spears. </em>
</p><p>Tora was relieved to find the roads weren’t in terrible condition; he and Poppy were lucky enough to live in a city where there was a rapid response time to inclement weather. After she told him she was pregnant, they’d instantly jumped into discussions of moving, buying a house somewhere quieter with enough room to grow their family. He could only hope that wherever they lived next, they’d be just as taken care of as they’d been in this city, in their apartment complex.</p><p>
  <em>Claussen’s dill pickles.</em>
</p><p>Though it was small and not the most modern building, the apartment was still <em>theirs</em>, the one place in his life that had truly felt like home. He smiled briefly as he remembered signing their lease agreement; it was the first time he’d ever seen their names together on a piece of paper, side by side.</p><p>
  <em>Claussen’s.</em>
</p><p>He’d miss the apartment when they finally left, but he was excited to make plans with her for their new house. It could be the place where they grew old together and it would <em>definitely </em>be where they brought their baby home from the hospital.</p><p>Home.</p><p>He smiled again as he recalled that there was once a time in his life when he wouldn’t even allow himself to <em>think </em>the word. And now? Now he was contemplating his <em>second </em>one with her.</p><p>He was so fucking lucky.</p><p><em>Claude’s? No, no. Clau… Claussen’s. </em> </p><p>When Tora pulled into the slushy parking lot of Katsubō’s, he turned the car off and leaned back quietly in his seat for a few moments. He allowed his mind to wander to his time in the clan, when he drove to discreet locations under cover of darkness, preparing to do even darker things.</p><p>Now, as he sat here under the neon glow of the grocery store’s sign, the light outlining and illuminating his features for anyone to see, he was <em>happy. </em>He <em>wanted </em>people to look at him, wanted them to know how damn thankful he was that his life had led him here, venturing out at two o’clock in the morning to buy a snack for his pregnant wife.</p><p>Tora walked into the twenty-four hour store and immediately squinted against the glare of the fluorescent lighting; fuck, his eyes were tired.</p><p>
  <em>Okay. Get in, get out, get home and get some pickles into Poppy so we can both get back to bed. </em>
</p><p>It should take half an hour, tops.</p><p>Tora stalked over to the aisle where he remembered seeing the pickles on his previous trips to Katsubō’s. When he turned the corner, he gaped at the wall of colorful jars he was faced with. Had there <em>always </em>been this many?</p><p>
  <em>Claussen’s. Dark green lid, red label. </em>
</p><p>His eyes scoured over the rainbow of labels in front of him until finally they landed on the container. He picked up the twenty-four ounce jar and cradled it in his hand for a moment as he tried to remember what size she said she’d wanted.</p><p>Fuck, he should’ve written it down.</p><p>His gaze fell to the bottom shelf, where there was a sixty-four ounce jar of Claussen’s pickles. Wouldn’t she prefer that? If cravings were going to be a constant occurring thing for the next nine months, shouldn’t they have <em>more </em>pickles on hand?</p><p>Yes, right?</p><p>Tora slid the smaller jar back into formation with the others and hauled the larger one up from the shelf by his feet. Better to be safe than sorry. Satisfied, he strode out of the aisle and made his way to the registers.</p><p>At this time of night, there was only one check-out lane open and two people in line ahead of him. He sighed as he planted his feet behind a tired-looking woman who was unloading sugary cereals, potato chips and ice cream onto the moving belt. Tora smirked to himself; if he didn’t know any better, he’d say this woman was shopping for his wife, too.</p><p>“Hey, is that the only item you have?” a feminine voice asked from behind him.</p><p>He turned and looked down at a younger looking girl, maybe sixteen or seventeen years old. She had long, fire-engine red hair, a silver stud in her nose and a name tag pinned to her shirt. <em>Cristal.</em></p><p>“Uh, yeah,” he said just as he began to feel familiar bile rising in his throat and annoyance poking at his spine. It was the same feeling every time he realized he was being mentally stripped, stared down like a goddamn piece of meat. This girl, this <em>kid </em>was eye-fucking him in the front of the store, like there weren’t three other people around them.</p><p>Like the light bouncing off his wedding ring had escaped her attention.</p><p>“Good,” she purred. “I can take care of you over here.”</p><p>Tora frowned as he watched Cristal walk away and flip on the overhead numbered light to a cubicle two lanes down. He turned his attention back to the woman ahead of him; she was still unloading her cart full of groceries. He let out a resigned sigh as he realized this was probably going to take awhile. He wanted to get back to Poppy as quickly as possible.</p><p>Defeated, he wandered over to Cristal’s aisle and thrust the large jar of pickles onto the counter. He quickly stepped in front of the card machine and made it a point to avoid eye contact with her.</p><p>“Mmm, I love pickles,” Cristal said as she moved the scanning wand over the label. “Especially <em>big </em>ones.”</p><p>“S’the total?” he gruffed out, ignoring the urge to roll his eyes. He just wanted to get back home to his wife.</p><p>“$6.87, handsome,” she said and his lip pulled upward in a half sneer; he did <em>not </em>like hearing one of Poppy’s terms of endearment for him slithering out of this little girl’s mouth.</p><p>Tora slid his card and the machine beeped rudely at him. He frowned back. The fuck?</p><p>“Oh, you’ve got a card with a chip in it,” Cristal pointed out, leaning over further than necessary to tap at the thin slot in the bottom of the machine. “You have to <em>stick it in.</em>”</p><p>Jesus fucking Christ, this was someone’s <em>daughter. </em></p><p>It felt like he stood there forever, waiting for the machine to chirp at him in acceptance. Cristal stared at him the entire time and popped a bubble with the gum he hadn’t realized she’d been chewing. He’d tried to avoid looking at her altogether.</p><p>Finally, the machine prompted him to remove his card. He yanked it out and shoved it roughly into his coat pocket as he watched Cristal scribble something down on his receipt. More than likely her number.</p><p>Tora hefted the jar of pickles into the crook of his arm and spat “Don’t need my receipt” over his shoulder at her as he stormed out the sliding glass doors.</p><p>---</p><p>“Here ya go, Bobby,” Tora said and smiled as he set the jar of pickles down on the counter in front of her. Seeing her and having Callum dance around his feet when he walked in had instantly put him in a better mood. Still tired, but better.</p><p>Poppy propped her elbows on the counter and pushed herself up to plant a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you <em>so much</em>, Tora. I don’t think I would’ve been able to go back to sleep until I had one. Or ten.”</p><p>Tora chuckled as he shed his coat and moved into the entry way to hang it up. “No big deal,” he called out to her. “Sorry I forgot ‘em in the first place. So, what do I gotta do for ya to give me another kis-“</p><p>He paused as he rounded the corner and froze in his tracks. Poppy was staring <em>hard a</em>t the jar of pickles, her eyebrows knitted together tightly. Bright tears seemingly from the well of her soul filled her eyes and she let out a long, low sob. Another, then another and soon her shoulders were shaking from crying.</p><p>
  <em>The hell?</em>
</p><p>The surprise evaporated from him and he rushed over to her, placing one hand over her belly without thinking about it.</p><p>“Sweetheart? S’wrong? Hey, talk to me,” he said and cupped her wet, red face between his palms.</p><p>She hiccupped and turned away from him. Each word that she managed to say was punctuated by a gasp and a sob; he couldn’t make out a single one.</p><p>“Take a breath, Bobby,” he murmured. “Just breathe and tell me what’s wrong.”</p><p>Poppy sniffled and inhaled deeply, then exhaled. She blinked up at him, fresh tears springing to her eyes. “They’re the wrong <em>ooooones,</em>” she wailed and a succession of sobs shook her little frame once more.</p><p>Her words felt like a slap to his face.</p><p>
  <em>Wrong ones? </em>
</p><p>“But… they’re Claussen’s,” he replied lamely, unsure of what else he could say. “Got the bigger one ‘cuz I thought-“</p><p>“I- <em>hic</em>- wanted dill spears,” she gasped out. “These are- <em>sniff</em>- bread and butter <em>chiiiiips</em>.”</p><p>
  <em>Fuck. Fuck. FUCK. </em>
</p><p>He hated seeing her cry, but knowing he was the reason? It fucking tore him to pieces.</p><p>“God damnit,” he groaned and pressed a kiss to her sweaty forehead. “I’m sorry.”</p><p>“Why didn’t you just- <em>hic</em>- let me write it down for <em>yooou</em>?” Poppy wept.</p><p>“’Cuz I’m a stubborn idiot,” he told her and pushed away strands of her long hair that were sticking to her cheeks.</p><p>At this, Poppy quieted mid-cry and stared up at him. “<em>No</em>, Tora. <em>No, you’re not. </em>You’re <em>perfect </em>and I- I…”</p><p>More tears, more sobs.</p><p>Jesus Christ.</p><p>The only way he could make this right was by going back to the store.</p><p>He dropped another kiss on her forehead and headed toward the entryway. He shrugged on his coat and heard Poppy speak out from behind him as he shoved his boots back on.</p><p>“W-where are you going?” she sniffled.</p><p>“Back to the store,” he told her.</p><p>Poppy immediately burst into tears. Tora turned around and faced her.</p><p>“S’matter?” he asked, his eyes locking onto her swollen ones.</p><p>“I don’t want you to have to go out again,” she cried. “You just got <em>baaaack.”</em></p><p>“Sweetheart, if dill pickles are what’s gonna make ya happy, then I’m gonna get ya some damn dill pickles.”</p><p>“B-but-“</p><p>“Poppy, s’okay. I’ll be right back.”</p><p>Once again, the switch flipped in her hamster brain; her eyes darkened in anger and she huffed at him. “Fine, Tora. Just… <em>fine. </em>Do whatever you want.”</p><p>Jesus, now she was mad at him? He couldn’t keep up. This was insane.</p><p><em>This isn’t Bobby, </em>he reminded himself. <em>This is Bobby possessed by a baby.</em></p><p>A fresh wave of tears broke over her as she scooped Callum up into her arms and headed toward the stairs.</p><p>
  <em>Christ, how many fucking times did he have to tell her…</em>
</p><p>“Bobby, don’t be carryin’ the damn dog up the steps,” he called after her.</p><p>“Oh, j-just,” he heard her sputter from the top of the staircase. “Just… drive safe, you asshole!”</p><p>Tora sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.</p><p>Once he got some pickles into Poppy, the <em>right </em>kind of pickles, everything would be okay.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <em>“Don’t fuck this up, son.”</em>
</p><p>When Tora faced off with the wall of pickles once more, he took a deep breath, pulled out his phone and snapped a picture of it.</p><p>
  <em>Circle which ones you want</em>
</p><p>Less than a minute later, his phone dinged with her response. There was a light blue circle around a jar of pickles on the middle shelf. He picked it up and took another photo.</p><p>
  <em>This it?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Yes. Now please come home. </em>
</p><p>Tora smirked at her message. As if she had to tell him even once to come home to her. She knew he always would.</p><p>
  <em>On my way sweetheart love you</em>
</p><p>When he approached the front of the store with the correct pickles in tow, he frowned as he realized there was only one check-out lane open and the little red-haired girl was running it.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck. </em>
</p><p>He <em>really</em> didn’t feel like getting hit on again.</p><p>Tora retreated around the corner of the aisle, waiting to see if the other checker from before would make his way towards the front. Three minutes passed and when there was no sign of the younger man, Tora heaved a defeated sigh and trudged his way up to the check-out lane. The quicker this was over, the quicker he’d get home to his wife.</p><p>Cristal smirked as he set the pickle jar down in front of her. “Back so soon, handsome?” she asked and slid the scanning wand over the bar code.</p><p>Tora said nothing and cast his glance downward to where he was pushing his debit card into the reader.</p><p>“Pickles, huh,” she said as she chewed noisily on her gum. She arched one eyebrow at him. “What else does a big guy like you crave, hmm?”</p><p>Jesus fucking Christ, this girl was almost as brazen as Quincey. She sounded like she’d maybe read one too many of his brother’s books. If Cristal was <em>his</em> daughter, he’d ground the shit out of her for talking like this. Especially to an older man, a stranger.</p><p>His kid would learn manners, respect, the importance of consent. His kid would never behave this way. His kid would grow up to be an even better person than him.</p><p>Tora reached for the jar of pickles and tucked it under his arm. As his hand reached out to take the receipt from her, Cristal’s grip on it tightened and she refused to let go.</p><p>“What are you doing later?” she purred, her blue eyes flickering up to peer at him through her fake eyelashes. “I get off at five and…”</p><p>Tora released the receipt and he glared at her.</p><p>“Ain’t it past yer bedtime?” he spat and stormed out the front door.</p><p>Nope. Not his kid.</p><p>
  <em>Never. </em>
</p><p>---</p><p>After Poppy finished crunching on her fifth dill pickle spear, she screwed the lid back on the jar and tucked it into the fridge. When she turned, she crossed the linoleum floor to the island, where Tora’s body was curled up on a barstool. She pressed her warm, little body into him and wrapped her arms around his waist.</p><p>“Thank you for doing all of that for me,” she mumbled into his chest. “I’m sorry I’ve been so crazy lately.”</p><p>“Pfft, do anythin’ for ya, kid. You know that,” he said and kissed her forehead. “And s’fine. Yer growin’ a human. Can’t imagine there’s much that’s easy about that.”</p><p>“Well, you make it easier,” she said and blinked her large brown eyes up at him. “Seriously, thank you so much, Tora. You’re my best friend and I-I…”</p><p>He knew what it looked like, that moment right before she burst into tears. Poppy was an emotional person and he’d become familiar with those telltale signs in the years they’d been together, especially over the past few weeks.</p><p>The downward tug of her eyebrows, the three little lines that etched into the skin between them and if you looked close enough, her chin would pinch and her bottom lip trembled, the slight rumbling of an avalanche before it cascaded over the edge. </p><p>All four signs were present now and he couldn’t bear to see her cry again tonight. They were both exhausted and needed to get to bed. She’d fall asleep quickly in the crook of his arm and one leg settled between his. She always did.</p><p>Tora hugged her tighter and raised himself off the stool. “C’mon, sweetheart. Let’s go to bed.”</p><p>Callum trotted softly behind them as they headed up the stairs and flopped down on the foot of the bed after they’d settled themselves under the blankets. Poppy burrowed into the space between Tora’s arm and his side and she hooked one foot between his long legs.</p><p>“Good night, handsome,” Poppy murmured into the quiet air of their bedroom. Her head rested against his chest and he felt it grow heavier. “I love you.”</p><p>Tora reached out with his free arm and splayed his hand over her belly.</p><p>“Love ya, too.”</p><p>---</p><p>Tora couldn’t fucking sleep.</p><p>Even with Poppy’s soft, warm breath rolling across his chest, even with the pleasant weight of Callum tucked into a ball against his feet. Even with his palm draped over their baby.</p><p>Shit.</p><p>For once, he wasn’t sure what had disarmed him to the point of being unable to go back to sleep. Usually there was a clear answer: night terrors, vivid, horrible memories that manifested as nightmares while he slept.</p><p>But tonight there hadn’t been so much as a glimmer of a dream, let alone a full-blown night terror. Maybe it had been his mistake? Poppy crying? The way the girl at the store had treated him?</p><p>Whatever it was, it was keeping him up.</p><p>Tora carefully twisted his body away from Poppy and swung his legs out from under the blankets. He planted his feet on the floor and stretched, wincing at the waves of crackling that came from his spine. He pushed himself upright and made his way across the room quietly, checking back over his shoulder to assure himself he hadn’t woken her.</p><p>She was still asleep. Though her nose was now buried deep in his pillow, it did little to hide her snores. Tora smiled to himself and moved down the hall.</p><p>When he reached the living room, he flipped on the table lamp beside the couch and stooped down to sift through the books in the gray, two-level shelving unit Poppy had thrifted last week. It was temporarily set up adjacent to their media table and would eventually be moved into the baby’s nursery.</p><p>Tora’s fingers flicked through the spines of the children’s books they’d been collecting before he settled on <em>If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. </em>He pulled the thin paperback from the shelf and stretched out on the couch. He stacked two pillows behind his back to keep his neck and chest somewhat elevated; this position always seemed to make his voice sound better, like he had more control over it.</p><p>Tora flipped the book open to its first page.</p><p>“<em>If you give a mouse a cookie,” </em>he read out loud, “<em>he’s going to ask for a glass of milk. When you give him the milk, he’ll probably ask you for a straw. When he’s finished, he’ll ask for…”</em></p><p>“Tora?”</p><p>Poppy’s quiet voice drifted out from behind him and he quickly shut the book. He rose from the couch and turned to face her. Her hair was messy, falling over her shoulders in a fit of waves. She blinked her half-lidded eyes and walked toward him.</p><p>“What are you doing?” she asked softly and slipped her arms around his waist.</p><p>“Couldn’t sleep,” he told her and rubbed his hands along her bare arms. “Came down here to read.”</p><p>At that, she angled her head to look up at him. “Read?”</p><p>He cleared his throat. “Uh, yeah. Not a big reader, so I’m practicin’. Wanna be better at it for when the baby gets here.”</p><p>“You’re… you’re practicing reading out loud for the baby?”</p><p>“Uh huh.”</p><p>In the soft glow of the lamp, Tora could make out the sheen of water filling his wife’s eyes. “Hey, Bobby, don’t cry,” he chuckled and swept his thumbs across her cheeks, catching the first tears before they fell.</p><p>She sniffed and wiped at her eyes. “Sorry, can’t help it,” she giggled. She was quiet for a moment and then asked, “Will you read to me?”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“Yeah. The baby can’t hear you just yet, but you can practice on me. I’ll put in a good word for you,” Poppy said and gave him a sleepy wink.</p><p>Tora snorted. “Okay, nerd. S’lay down and get comfy.” He sprawled himself back into his previous position on the couch and held his right arm above his head while Poppy situated herself on the cushions. She laid down on her left side and rested one hand over his heart, keeping the other balled up against her chest. She hooked her right leg over his and then pressed as tightly against him as she could.</p><p>“I’m ready,” she yawned.</p><p>Tora brought his arm down around Poppy and held the thin book open with both hands. He angled his head a moment to glance over his shoulder. “Where’s the boy?” he asked.</p><p>“Still in bed. When I got up, he was busy trying to get under the covers.”</p><p>“Pfft. Fuckin’ bum,” Tora said and chuckled as his wife poked him playfully in the ribs. “Ya comfy, Bobby?” he asked as he gazed down at her little body. The plush couch was wider than a standard sofa, but not exactly wide enough to accommodate both of them lying together side by side.</p><p>“Mmmhmm,” she murmured.</p><p>“Need a blanket or anythin’?”</p><p>“No, you’re warm enough for me.”</p><p>He chuckled again. More than once, she’d sworn that he had lava flowing in his veins instead of blood; she loved referring to him as her own personal space heater. Fine by him if it meant that she’d always press her body against him to seek out his warmth.</p><p>Tora cleared his throat and started from the beginning. “<em>When you give a mouse a cookie, he’s going to ask for a glass of milk…”</em></p><p>He didn’t make it five pages in before they both fell asleep.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>One Week Later</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Ooookay,” Poppy said and rubbed her palms together. “Are you ready?”</p><p>“Yup,” Tora said. “Why don’tcha go sit down on the couch? I’ll grab the punk and the ultrasound.”</p><p>“I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that being pregnant is not code for ‘totally helpless’,” she said and puffed her cheeks out at him. “I can go get Cal. I even managed to put the shirt on him by myself.” She smirked and cupped her little hands around her hips.</p><p>Stubborn ass little woman.</p><p>“Fine,” Tora grumbled. “Just don’t go pickin’ him up.”</p><p>Poppy rolled her eyes and mock saluted him. “Yes, sir.” She turned her back to him then and began to climb the stairs. “Callie! Wanna talk to your Uncle Quincey?” he heard her call, her voice growing quieter the further she walked down the hall.</p><p>Tora moved into the kitchen and plucked the eight-week ultrasound photo from the front of their fridge. He held the image in both hands, pinching the sides between his thumbs and pointer fingers. This grainy, little black and white picture was it, the first visual he and Poppy had of the tiny person they’d made.</p><p>When they’d walked into the doctor’s office that day, he wasn’t sure what he was expecting. He had zero experience with pregnancy, babies or ultrasounds. Fuck, he hadn’t even seen a <em>real </em>doctor until two years ago, when Poppy prompted him to go in for a general check-up and physical.</p><p>Before that, he’d only ever dealt with physicians on the Balthuman payroll and the most they’d ever done was tended to his injuries, tested him for STD’s and taken his urine to ensure he was obeying the clan’s no substance order.</p><p>This was a totally different world, one that he never thought he’d get to see.</p><p>Tora watched as the ultrasound technician squirted blue goo onto his wife’s belly and then rolled a weird looking wand over her skin. As the image of their baby flickered onto the screen, Tora sucked in his breath and grabbed Poppy’s hand. When their fingers made contact, she turned her head to look up at him. Tears were streaming down her face as she squeezed his hand even tighter.</p><p>It was so damn tiny. “<em>Not much bigger than a kidney bean</em>,” the tech told them. As Tora’s eyes focused on the screen, he was able to make out a tiny leg and arm protruding from the sloping, curvy body of their baby, their bean.</p><p>When Tora had first laid eyes on Poppylan, he’d been unable to believe that someone so beautiful could possibly exist. And now, seeing their baby for the first time…</p><p>Fuck, how was there even <em>more </em>beauty in this world?  How had <em>he</em> helped create it?</p><p>In that moment, he was convinced he’d seen it all. There was no way his senses could ever be as overwhelmed as they were right then. Everything he could possibly want was there in that room. Nothing else mattered.</p><p>And then, the technician played the baby’s heartbeat.</p><p>The sound was strange, pulsing, yet grainy and muffled. But it sounded <em>familiar</em>; it reminded him of laying his head on Poppy’s bare chest after making love to her and hearing her heart thud against his ear. It sounded close, almost like he could reach out and hold it gently in his hand.</p><p>
  <em>Love. </em>
</p><p>It sounded like fucking love.</p><p>This was the heartbeat of another person he loved, who would love <em>him</em> in return.</p><p>At this realization, Tora dropped his elbows beside Poppy’s shoulders on the medical bed and pressed a kiss to her temple. Her free hand came up to cover her mouth and she told him later that she could feel herself starting to sob and she didn’t want them to miss hearing their baby’s heartbeat for a second.</p><p>He smiled down at the photo in his hands; Christ, Bean was so small he could cover it with the tip of his thumb. He couldn’t wait to find out the gender; he wanted to know if it was a boy or a girl, wanted something to help humanize it, create a more vivid image in his mind, his heart.</p><p>
  <em>Boy or girl? Son or daughter?</em>
</p><p>The sound of Poppy padding softly down the stairs pulled Tora from his thoughts and he looked over at her. Callum was trailing slowly behind her, not looking at all pleased to be wearing the t-shirt Poppy had custom ordered for him.</p><p>“Okay sir, I’ve rounded up the troops,” Poppy said and mock saluted him again. She gestured downward to Cal with one hand and rubbed the other over her belly. “Murakami’s, reporting for duty.”</p><p>Tora snorted. “Fuckin’ nerd,” he smiled at her. “C’mon, let’s sit on the couch for this one. Have a feelin’ it’s gonna take awhile. Ya know how the princess gets.”</p><p>Poppy rolled her eyes playfully. “I only talk to him on the phone every week,” she said. “This is going to take so long that we might as well get tucked into bed.”</p><p>“Pfft. Not lettin’ him keep Bean up past its bedtime.”</p><p>They settled themselves side by side on the couch and when Poppy reached down to haul Callum onto the sofa, Tora shoved his fingers into her armpit. Poppy shrieked and choked back a laugh as she wriggled her body to move away from him. While she was distracted, Tora swooped down and hefted Callum onto her lap.</p><p>Poppy rolled her eyes again. “Tora…”</p><p>“I know, I know, Poppylan, yer not an invalid. But ya <em>are</em> pregnant. So just lemme do all the heavy liftin’, okay? It’d make me feel better.”</p><p>“Cal only weighs fifteen pounds…”</p><p>“Ain’t the point, Bobby. Hang onto that punk so he doesn’t go anywhere. Ya got him? Gonna call Quince now.” Tora stretched his arm out in front of him as far as he could and angled his phone in his hand so all three of them would appear in the camera. He tapped the FaceTime button on his screen, then typed <em>Quince </em>into the search bar. He waited.</p><p>Nothing happened.</p><p>“Tora,” Poppy giggled after a moment, “you have to hit the <em>video </em>button to start the call.”</p><p>“Hate this fuckin’ tech hacker shit,” he grumbled and stabbed at the little camera shaped button next to Quincey’s name. Beside him, Poppy adjusted Callum so he was facing forward on her lap.</p><p>The phone barely rang once before Quincey’s smiling face filled the screen.</p><p>“<em>Hellooooo</em>, beautiful family!” he chirped and waggled his fingers at them. His bright blue eyes locked onto Callum and Quincey squealed. “Callie! How’s the cutest nephew in the whole wide world?” He continued to talk to the dog in a fucking annoying high-pitched voice, intermittently making weird sound effects and kissing noises.</p><p>Cal cocked his head at the phone and wagged his tail slightly; Quincey was the damn dog’s favorite person and he seemed confused as to why he could hear his voice but not see him in the room with them.</p><p>Tora let it go on another fifteen or so seconds before cutting his brother off.</p><p>“Think he’s doin’ fine, Quince,” Tora said and rolled his eyes. “How was the Netherlands?”</p><p>“Oh, <em>fabulous, </em>per usual. Jonathan surprised me by taking me to the Love Lock Bridge in Germany, he said it was the perfect way to celebrate our engagement.”</p><p>“That adorable man decorated a pink padlock for us to attach to the bridge and then we threw the key into the Rhine River. It was <em>so </em>romantic. Guess where my new novel takes place?” Quincey chuckled.</p><p>“That’s so cute, Quincey!” Poppy said. “Do you have pictures? You’ll have to send them to us.”</p><p>“Pfft, do I have pictures? Honey, don’t confuse me with your husband. <em>I’m</em> not a caveman. I’ll email them to you later.”</p><p>Tora huffed an annoyed sigh and Poppy laughed under her breath. “Speaking of your <em>fiancé</em>, where is he? We’d love to say hello,” she said.</p><p>“Oh, he’s plunging the toilet,” Quincey said, waving one hand aimlessly in the air. “We had Mexican last night and you know how I get. He should be done soon.”</p><p>Tora watched as Poppy’s little hamster nose wrinkled on her face. “Ew, Quincey. From now on, let’s just add that to the top of the list of things I never need to know.”</p><p>“<em>So</em> fuckin’ glad I ain’t on toilet duty anymore,” Tora mumbled.</p><p>“Well, I guess we’ll just have to show Jonathan later,” Poppy shrugged and grinned up at Tora. He returned her smile and reached out to pinch her cheek. She smacked at his hand and turned her attention back to Quincey, who was practically staring holes into their sofa.</p><p>“Show him what? I want to see,” Quincey said, his eyebrows raised.</p><p>Poppy gazed back up at Tora, as though asking his permission. He shrugged. “Might as well do it now,” he told her. “Ya got the princess all riled up.”</p><p>“Okay, Quincey, are you ready?”</p><p>“Oh God, honey, <em>yes. </em>You know I love surprises.”</p><p>Tora helped Poppy turn Callum around on her lap so his backside was facing the camera. She pulled the dog’s baseball style shirt down and smoothed out the wrinkles in the back where the words “Big Bro” were printed in bold, black lettering.</p><p>Quincey squinted at the screen. “’Big Bro’? Did Poppy shrink one of your shirts, Tiger Boy?”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes at his brother. “Christ’s sake, Quince, no. Think about it.”</p><p>Quincey held the phone closer to his face, his blue eyes focused hard on the words written on Cal’s shirt. His mouth moved slightly as he murmured them out loud. “’Big… Bro…’”</p><p>Poppy slowly lifted the photo of the ultrasound into Quincey’s view.</p><p>Tora watched as Quincey’s eyes suddenly stretched wide open and his mouth dropped. “OOOOH. AHHHHH. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. BABY TIGER. AHHHHH. JONATHAN, GET IN HERE, HONEYPOT. RIGHT NOW.”</p><p>At the sharp sound of Quincey’s shrieking, Callum jumped and wriggled on Poppy’s lap. “Quincey,” she laughed, “not so loud! You’re scaring Cal!”</p><p>“Oooh, sorry. I’m sorry, sweet boy!” Quincey cooed at the Cavapoo. Then he turned to Tora. “So, Fuh… Fiji?”</p><p>Tora nodded. “Yup.”</p><p>Quincey shifted his eyes to Poppy. “So… you have a little… island nibling in your uterus? Right now?”</p><p>Poppy giggled. “Yeah, Quincey.”</p><p>“Do you feel sick? Do you have to puke? You can go to the bathroom if you need to,” Quincey rambled. “Oh my god, honey. Oh my GOD.”</p><p>“I’m fine,” Poppy told him. “I’ve been really lucky, I haven’t had any nausea so far.”</p><p>Quincey nodded quickly. “Okay. Okay. So I have to ask you one thing. Were you wearing the lingerie?”</p><p>Tora smirked as Poppy’s cheeks instantly turned red. “Um… once,” she squeaked.</p><p>Quincey let out another shriek that once again caused Callum to fidget on Poppy’s legs. “Yesss!” Tora’s brother cried. “You’re welcome! You’re welcome! YOU’RE WELCOME!”</p><p>“Quince, <em>volume</em>,” Tora grumbled, but couldn’t help the feelings of pride, <em>happiness </em>that were swelling in his chest. They settled at the corners of his mouth, slightly tugging them upwards.</p><p>“Ah, sorry!” Quincey chirped and then turned his head over his shoulder. “Oh my god, where is that big brute? JONATHAN! HONEYPOT!”</p><p>There was a loud bang as Quincey slammed the phone down on the kitchen counter and then Tora heard an “Oh, shit,” as the phone clattered to the ground. They were left with the view of his penthouse ceiling and the sound of Quincey screaming at his fiancé in the background.</p><p>“HONEYPOT, GET IN HERE. NO, PU- STOP. PUT THAT DOWN AND GET THE FUCK IN HERE NOW.”</p><p>Tora glanced over at Poppy and used his free hand to stroke small circles on her belly. “Cross yer legs and cover the kid’s ears,” he mumbled as his brother continued to holler at Jonathan over the phone.</p><p>“Oh please, like he hasn’t heard worse things coming from you,” Poppy grinned at him.</p><p>Tora’s hand froze against her shirt.</p><p>“<em>He</em>?” he asked softly and resumed his soft little strokes on her stomach. "Ya think Bean's a he?"</p><p>“Yeah,” she said and placed one of her tiny hands over his. “I don’t know why, but I do. I just <em>feel</em> it.”</p><p>“Pregnant hamster intuition, huh?” he chuckled.</p><p>“Pfft, yeah. Something like that.”</p><p>They sat there quietly a moment longer, waiting for Quincey to drag Jonathan out of the bathroom. Tora had to chuckle to himself; announcing their pregnancy to his brother had gone down <em>exactly </em>the way he thought it would. In the years they’d put between themselves and the clan, Quincey had never allowed anyone or anything to extinguish his spirit.</p><p>After Quincey had essentially been forced to shoot Kane, Tora thought maybe his brother would slow down, need some time to recover. And while he began therapy shortly after they’d been moved into the witness protection apartments, his dramatics never ceased. If anything, they rose in volume and he’d never admit it out loud, but Tora was <em>glad. </em>As annoying as his younger brother could be, he never wanted to see him change.</p><p>And if that meant dealing with his damn drama, loudness and nosiness for the rest of his life, then so be it.</p><p>Because Quincey had been out of the country, they’d had to wait to tell him about the baby last. They’d called Poppy’s granny first and when she read the back of Cal’s shirt, Eleanor had started laughing and crying so hard that she accidently hung up on them.</p><p>When she called back, she’d calmed down enough to ask how Poppy was feeling and how their doctor appointments had gone. When they showed her the ultrasound, she’d started crying again and made them promise to send her a copy.</p><p>They’d called Alice next, who congratulated them by cackling and saying, “Hopefully the baby takes after yer looks, Poppy.” Tora had frowned, which caused the old woman to start cackling again.</p><p>Gyu had been next; he’d answered the phone and Tora and Poppy exchanged a glance when Mirabelle appeared over his shoulder a moment later. They were both tugging gaming headphones from their heads and Gyu leaned over to mute the tv.</p><p>“Holy shit, bro! Really?” Gyu asked around a grin as Tora held up the ultrasound photo.</p><p>“Oh my <em>god, </em>Pops!” Mirabelle squealed on the other side of the screen and then turned to Gyu. “You’re going to be an uncle! Uncle Flop!” she cried and flicked one perfectly manicured hand through Gyu’s mop of hair.</p><p>Gyu glared at the phone when he caught Tora smirking at him. “Bro, forget you ever heard it.”</p><p>And Tora <em>did </em>forget it. Until they mailed Gyu his birthday card three days later.</p><p>Dani and her husband Matt were thrilled at the news and Tora wasn’t surprised that Dani instantly dove into “bodyguard mode”. Since leaving her job with the airline, she’d gone back to school to become a nurse and interrogated Poppy about her diet, how much sleep she was getting and if Tora was taking proper care of her.</p><p>Seemingly satisfied with Poppy’s answers, they chatted for awhile longer and right before they ended the call, Dani did the “I’m watching you” gesture with two fingers and pointed at Tora.</p><p>Out of all the people they told, Erdene was the only one who held a candle to Quincey’s dramatic reaction. The moment she saw the ultrasound on the screen, she’d screamed and began jumping up and down on her bright red couch, her phone still clutched in her hand.</p><p>“I’m so happy for you!” she’d shrieked. “Oh my god, Poppy, this is <em>so</em> not fair. Your boobs are going to look even <em>more a</em>mazing. And <em>girl.</em> You’re going to have a glow without needing to use any of that expensive fucking highlighting oil.”</p><p>As Erdene continued to ramble on to Poppy about the pregnancy and personal “girl things”, Tora had quickly pressed a kiss to Poppy’s temple, told Erdene goodbye and slipped away to play video games with Gyu and Avery.  </p><p>Tora’s head snapped to attention when Quincey’s face reappeared on their phone screen with Jonathan beside him. The taller Dutch man waved hello at them and then Quincey shoved the phone up to his fiance’s face.</p><p>“Look, look at Callum. Poppy, show him the shirt,” Quincey said.</p><p>Poppy angled the dog on her lap so the back of his shirt faced the phone.</p><p>“Hi, puppy!” Jonathan said. “How are you doing?”</p><p>Quincey rolled his eyes. “READ HIS SHIRT.”</p><p>Jonathan squinted for a moment and then his face cracked into a smile. “Oooh, you’re going to have a baby? Gefeliciteerd!"</p><p>Tora snorted. “Least <em>some </em>people got it right away.”</p><p>Quincey ignored him. “Honeypot, you know what this means? We’re going to be uncles! Oh my gosh, we have to go shopping for the baby. Is it a boy? No wait, don’t tell me, it’s a girl. Oh fuck it, I’ll buy for both. Jonathan, come- hey, get back here! The toilet will still be clogged when we get home from the mall.”</p><p>Quincey turned his face to the phone and smacked his lips at them. “Muah, muah! Kisses, love you three! Er… four! Or five? Oh god, what if it’s twins? I am <em>not </em>prepared for this. Okay, bye!” Quincey rambled and then abruptly ended the call.</p><p>“Fucking Christ,” Tora breathed and stretched his arms out over his head. “The hell <em>was </em>all that?”</p><p>Poppy giggled as she helped Callum down to the floor. She placed one hand over her tummy and sighed.</p><p>"<em>T</em><em>hat</em>,” she said, “was Uncle Quincey.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fun fact: the word "katsubō" means craving in Japanese and "Gefeliciteerd" is the Dutch word for congratulations :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. We're Hoping It's a Dinosaur - Second Trimester</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora prepare to become parents.</p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>**WARNING: this chapter has a mention of violence and blood, which may be triggering to some**</p><p> </p><p>Well, the second trimester has a little bit of everything: Poppy/Tora fluff, annoyed Tora, angst, mention of violence, a heart to heart, more Poppy/Tora fluff, a tiny bit of smut and Tora/Quincey fluff. </p><p>I have several of you to thank for requesting Poppy and Tora's pregnancy:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Audrey, RaquelSousa, Spotlightgirlontherun, Rollie89, Foxesinboxes, and Mackgurl2020.</p><p>Special shoutout to my mommy/baby/pregnancy gurus CopyPastel and OneAndOnlyTako. Your candidness and eagerness to help me tell this part of the story will FOREVER be appreciated &lt;3 </p><p>Thank you to Gaby for not only being my person and "yes" queen, but for also not being afraid to call me out when my writing takes a Game of Thrones turn lol. "Too dark, U-Turn, come back to the light!" LOVE YOU BEST FRAND.</p><p>Much love as always to my ladies in the PWWSTS chat, you never fail to make me smile :) </p><p>I hope you all enjoy the second trimester of Poppy's pregnancy! (I know Tora is *wink wink*)</p><p>And most of all, thank YOU all for being here for Stages. Throughout my time working on this series, please know that your support and encouragement has helped me come out of my shell; people notice I am a much happier and satisfied person when I'm writing. I'm so grateful to have all of YOU to write for. </p><p>Love you all and see you soon &lt;3 </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>Come hang out with me on Instagram! @peanut.butterandchelly</p><p>You can also come hang out on a livestream tonight with me, CopyPastel, BegoniaRex and mela1223 on Twitch, 9:30 CST time. We literally talk about nothing, everything and laugh way too much.</p><p>https://www.twitch.tv/justcopypastel</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>Second Trimester</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>---</strong>
</p><p>If she didn’t knock her shit off, Poppy was going to drive Tora to start smoking again.</p><p>“Poppylan, <em>put that down,</em>” Tora growled as he moved past her, his arms bulging as they straddled a large carton containing some of her books. His shirt was sticking to the sweat between his shoulder blades, his hair was falling loose into his eyes and his wife’s stubbornness had seemingly been cranked to a fucking eleven since she’d entered her second trimester.</p><p>God damnit, when was the last time he’d craved a cigarette this badly?</p><p>Poppy shot him a frown across the blue and pink stickered cardboard box in her hands. “Tora, this literally weighs nothing. I’m being careful, I promise. When Dani was over last night, she told me I could lift anything twenty-five pounds and under.”</p><p>“Yeah, honey, calm down,” Quincey piped up from the other side of her, cradling a pile of throw blankets in his own arms. “You literally yelled at her for carrying that big teddy bear five minutes ago.”</p><p>“<em>That-</em> mmpf- ain’t a teddy bear,” Tora grunted out as he shifted the box under one arm so he could open the bright red front door of their new house. Why the <em>fuck</em> had Gyu closed it? “S’a damn box. She’s already carryin’ our kid; she doesn’t need to be carrying anythin’ else.”</p><p>“Can’t you just trust her when she says she’s being careful?” Quincey called out behind him.</p><p>“Nope,” Tora called back as he stooped to set the box down in the family room. He didn’t even have to look over his shoulder to know that both Poppy and Quincey were rolling their eyes at him and he could give two shits. Poppy and Bean were his entire world and like <em>Christ </em>if he was going to see either one of them get hurt.</p><p><em>Especially</em> not because his wife was being fucking headstrong and insistent on helping.</p><p>Tora let out a sigh and pushed away the strands of his hair that had slipped free from his bun. He stood for a moment with his hands on his hips, surveying the room that was slowly becoming crowded with their belongings. A smile played on his lips as his eyes ran over the bright entryway, the stained wooden bannister along the staircase that he could just <em>see </em>their kid attempting to slide down one day.</p><p>He <em>loved </em>their new house.</p><p>They’d found it in the small quiet suburb of Ikigai, about twenty minutes north of Bōken. It was a traditional two story house with three bedrooms and two bathrooms; it’d been built in the late eighties but had been heavily updated since then. The exterior was soft, consisting of white trim, gray shutters, beige siding and then there was that bright red fucking door. Poppy had literally squealed when she first saw it and he knew right then that they’d never change it. Not that he minded.</p><p>The house just had… <em>room. </em>It was airy, light and had a large, split level deck off the back door that would soon be dotted with most of their plants. Maybe a toddler pool one day? It also had an extra bedroom should they ever decide to have another kid. This house would <em>grow </em>with them, protect all their future moments inside its walls and it would keep his family safe, comfortable and warm.</p><p>Tora’s smile grew wider as his gaze traveled across the family room to the two large windows, the ceiling-high wooden bookshelf that curved into the wall. The Gyu hovering on the floor in front of the built-in fireplace.</p><p>“Oi, Flop, how’s it goin’ in here?” Tora asked as he strode across the wood floor to his friend.</p><p>Gyu pushed his hair out of his eyes and leveled a glare up at him. Tora smirked.</p><p>“Got the tv mounted,” Gyu said and pointed at the flat screen hanging above the mantel. “And ya almost have internet.” Tora stretched his hand downward, caught a long piece of Gyu’s hair between his fingers and tugged.</p><p>“Hey, knock it off, bro!” Gyu barked and swatted Tora’s hand away. “If ya didn’t come in here to help, then get the hell out!”</p><p>“Kickin’ me outta my own house?” Tora asked and cocked an eyebrow at him.</p><p>“Yeah,” Gyu huffed. “I am. Go back outside or I’m gonna rent a buncha porn on ya smart tv and tell Pops it was you.”</p><p>Tora snorted. “Dunno how to do any of that shit and she knows it.”</p><p>Gyu chuckled. “Right,” he said and turned his attention back to the pile of cords in front of him.</p><p>“Picking on Gyu now, Mr. Grumpy?”</p><p>At the sound of his wife’s voice drifting over his shoulder, Tora spun around. Poppy was crossing the threshold of the room and she <em>still had the fucking box in her hands. </em></p><p>“God damnit, woman,” Tora grumbled as he took two wide steps toward her, arms outstretched. “Didn’t I tell ya not to carry…” He trailed off and his eyes widened as he lifted the carton from her grasp. It felt like… nothing. What’d she packed into this fucking thing? Air?</p><p>She’d clearly seen the surprised look on his face, because Poppy smirked and arched an eyebrow up at him. “Well?” she asked.</p><p>“Sorry, Bobby,” he murmured as he tucked the box into a corner out of the way. “Just saw you with a box in ya hands and…” He turned and bent his head to her level. Tora cupped her face in his hands. “Yer so goddamn <em>stubborn</em>,” he told her and lightly pinched one of her cheeks.</p><p>“Ack! Stop!” she giggled and smacked his hand away from her assaulted cheek.</p><p>Smirking, Tora pinched the apple of her other cheek.</p><p>“Okay, okay, you’re forgiven!” she laughed and gripped his hand in hers. Tora pressed a kiss to the top of her head and waited to speak until she looked up at him.</p><p>“Ain’t bossin’ ya to be a dick, sweetheart,” he murmured. “Just worry ‘bout both of ya.” He trailed his free hand lightly across the swell of her belly. Seemingly with a mind of their own, his fingers slowly traveled north to graze the undersides of her breasts; her tummy wasn’t the <em>only </em>thing getting bigger.</p><p>Fuck, and he didn’t think it was possible to be even <em>more </em>attracted to her. Had trouble keeping his hands to himself most days. Lucky for him, the feeling was mutual. In these past few weeks of her pregnancy, if she wasn’t overcome by chaotic stubborn energy, she was filled with a bottomless desire for him.</p><p>“<em>Tora</em>,” she breathed and her eyes flickered to their friend, still working on his knees behind them.</p><p>“What?” he murmured. “He ain’t payin’ attention.”</p><p>“Nope,” Gyu spoke up. “And I’m not listening either.”</p><p>A bright red blush fanned over Poppy’s cheeks and feathered out across her neck. She pushed Tora’s hand away and looked up at him. “<em>Later</em>,” she mouthed and he nodded. His hand retreated south and he splayed his palm over her bump once more.</p><p>He grinned as he caught a glimpse of the black t-shirt she was wearing beneath her light jacket. He’d picked the shirt up for her while running errands one day; splashed across the chest in bold blue letters were the words “We’re Hoping It’s a Dinosaur.” There was a little blue cartoony stegosaurus graphic where the shirt stretched slightly over her swollen belly.</p><p>“Tora,” Poppy said, placing her hand over his, “I appreciate how much you care, but I won’t overdo it, okay? I promise. I worry about us, too.”</p><p>“Just let me carry the boxes, kay?” he said. “It’ll make me feel better if ya stick to stuff like towels. Blankets and pillows. Light, fluffy shit. <em>Please.</em>”</p><p>“I would, but Quincey keeps hogging them all.”</p><p>Tora narrowed his eyes. “Fuckin’ bum. I’ll get him sorted out, c’mon.” He wrapped his fingers around hers and gently pulled her toward the door.</p><p>“Thanks for helping, Gyu!” Poppy called out as he tugged her forward. Gyu grunted in reply; it was a sound Tora recognized that meant his friend was deep in thought. At least <em>someone </em>was working around here.</p><p>As Tora and Poppy crossed through the front door onto the pavement, they were met by Quincey making his way up the sidewalk, grasping a small red and white cooler in his hands and Jonathan following closely behind him.</p><p>“Jonathan brought more drinks!” the blonde man chirped them. “I made him pick up Fiji water for the little island nibling. Wanted them to have a taste of home, you know?”</p><p>“Surprised to see ya carrying that-” Tora said, nodding toward the cooler “-considerin’ it weighs more than a <em>blankie</em>.”</p><p>Quincey frowned at him and plunked the plastic box down into the grass. He cupped his fingers around his hips. “Well, meoooow to you too, Tiger Boy. What’s that supposed to mean?”</p><p>“Means yer capable of liftin’ more and ya just volunteered to help me bring in the gray bookshelf,” Tora told him. He released Poppy’s hand and advanced toward his brother. He clapped one large hand around Quincey’s shoulder. “<em>Now.</em>”</p><p>“Now, just <em>wait </em>a minute. <em>Who </em>brought the six foot five Dutch weapon of moving things to h…” Quincey stopped abruptly, his eyes widening at something behind Tora. “Um, Mama? Poppy, honey, are you okay?”</p><p>
  <em>Okay?</em>
</p><p>Tora’s heart seized in his chest. He snapped his head around and was met with the sight of Poppy, her eyebrows pinched together and blood dripping from her nose onto the sidewalk below.</p><p>---</p><p>Tora sat on the concrete curb bordering their front yard, his feet planted firmly on the street, knees to his ears and his head cast downward at the ground. He sucked in a large breath, then slowly released it. His rib cage rattled behind his chest and he clenched his fingers into fists at his sides.</p><p>
  <em>Get it together. She’s fine. Bean’s fine. Everything’s fine. </em>
</p><p>He’d seen Poppy bleed before; shit, she’d bled on Quincey’s countertop the night they first met. Tora thought of all the times he’d helped doctor her up after she’d cut herself shaving or tripped over her own two feet on an unforgiving surface. He’d even washed the sheets a few times after she’d started her period in the middle of the night and left small stains behind.</p><p>While he’d hated seeing Poppy bleed in the past, it had never affected him the way it did today.</p><p>
  <em>Why?</em>
</p><p>Because all those times before, he’d expected it? To the point where he’d gotten used to it, maybe? They were typical things that happened because of her clumsiness or because of her random luck in being born a woman.</p><p>And now… she was pregnant. Her body was changing. The baby was growing.</p><p>Now Tora had twice as much to lose.</p><p>Fuck, he couldn’t stop thinking about the <em>look </em>on her face. Eyebrows pinched, the skin of her forehead wrinkled, as though she was confused, like she didn’t understand what was happening to her. Her brown eyes wide, blinking at him and Quincey as blood trickled from her nose, spattering onto the ground in a small puddle at her tiny feet.</p><p>He’d been so <em>sure</em> he was about to watch his wife drop dead on the concrete.</p><p>And then, he’d heard <em>his </em>voice.</p><p>
  <em>“This one is a heavy bleeder.”</em>
</p><p>He just… couldn’t move. Couldn’t react. Because there was nothing, <em>no one </em>to react to? He’d always been prepared if <em>people </em>were a threat: he could plan an attack or use his body to strike fear into someone.</p><p>But, unlike his most recent nightmare, Vincent <em>wasn’t </em>there causing her harm. It was something happening to her body, <em>because </em>of her body, which meant that it could also be happening to the baby.</p><p>There was <em>nothing </em>he could do and that thought terrified him more than anything else in this world. Not being able to protect the ones he loved.</p><p>
  <em>Nothing he could do.</em>
</p><p>And that’s what he did.</p><p>
  <em>Nothing. </em>
</p><p>He’d just frozen in place, could hear himself at that little casino all those years ago, telling Heavy Bleeder how to stop the facial bleeding Tora had caused but he couldn’t tell Poppy. <em>His own wife.</em></p><p>Could do nothing but feel Quincey’s sudden, tight grasp on his arm. Christ, the man still got queasy at even the <em>mention</em> of the word “blood.”</p><p>Could only stare as Jonathan rushed forward to Poppy’s side, telling her to lean forward slightly so the blood didn’t travel down her nostrils and throat. Could hear Poppy telling everyone she was fine, it wasn’t a big deal, the doctor said nosebleeds were common during pregnancy, a fact Tora had <em>completely</em> forgotten until she said it.</p><p>Could only blink as Jonathan was in and out of the house like a shot, passing a washrag over to Poppy. The tall, blonde man had then scooped some ice out of the cooler, helped her wrap it in the cloth and gently pressed the makeshift cold compress against the bridge of her nose.</p><p>After a little resistance from Poppy, who was holding the ice to her nose with one hand and pinching her nostrils closed with the other, she finally allowed Jonathan to lead her inside to sit down until the bleeding stopped.</p><p>Tora couldn’t even follow the two of them and then Quincey into the house. Too ashamed.</p><p>Tora inhaled again. Exhaled. Still shaky. His hands snaked through his hair, his fingers opening and closing tightly against his scalp.</p><p>Jesus fucking Christ, he could only <em>stand there and watch</em> as another man took care of his wife.</p><p>First the night terror, now <em>this</em>.</p><p>
  <em>What was wrong with him?</em>
</p><p>Tora perked up at the sound of soft, approaching footsteps in the grass behind him.</p><p>“You okay, booboo?”</p><p>At the sound of his younger brother’s voice, Tora glanced upward. The blonde man was standing at Tora’s left side, staring down at him, his blue gaze soft as he stretched his arm out to hand Tora a bottle of water. Tora took it and nodded his thanks. Instead of sipping at the water, he rolled the plastic bottle back and forth between his palms.</p><p>The soles of Quincey’s shoes scraped against the loose gravel on the side of the road as he lowered himself to sit on the ground.</p><p>“Hey,” he said quietly and Tora turned his head to look at him. “She’s going to be okay, honey. Nibling, too. They <em>are </em>okay. Poppy said the doctor told you guys that-“</p><p>“Know what the doctor said, Quince,” Tora mumbled, shifting his eyes to the street. His grasp around the bottle tightened. “Managed to remember that after I stopped freakin’ the fuck out.”</p><p>“Um, yeah. That, uh…” Quincey scratched at the back of his neck. “That was… unlike you. I’ve never seen you stop dead in your tracks and just… <em>stay </em>there.”</p><p>Tora squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose. What he was about to tell his brother was something he hadn’t told <em>anyone. </em>Not Julia, not even Poppy. It was too awful, made him feel things that were too terrible to name. But if holding it in was going to invoke him to react this way in these types of situations, by causing him to not react <em>at all</em>, then he had to get it off his chest.</p><p>And out of anyone, Quincey would understand best.</p><p>Inhale.</p><p>Exhale.</p><p>“Had a night terror a couple of weeks ago,” Tora began. The hand that was holding his nose circled into a fist and he shoved it under his leg. “’Bout… <em>him.</em>”</p><p>Quincey cocked an eyebrow at him, his lips half parted in surprise. “Oh. Um, how bad was it?”</p><p>“Woke up swingin’ next to my pregnant wife.”</p><p>Quincey blinked, but said nothing. He nodded and waited.</p><p>Inhale.</p><p>“Took the baby, Quince. Before I even knew what was happenin’. She put up a fight but he hit her. Fuck, he hit her so <em>hard</em> and just took the baby from her arms, like it belonged to him. God <em>damnit</em>…”</p><p>Exhale.</p><p>Tora set the water bottle down and closed his eyes.</p><p>He could see Poppy struggling in the hospital bed, crying and screaming while she clawed at Vincent. Vincent’s fist lashing out, once, twice and then she went still. He could see Poppy’s head roll to the side, eyes wide, blood trickling from her nose, down her face.</p><p>Tora could still smell the coppery scent of blood, permeating the room, could taste it in his mouth. Could see Vincent’s red-stained hands, cradling their crying baby. Could hear his last words to him before he walked out the door and closed it shut behind him, sealing Tora inside a dark hospital room with his bludgeoned wife and his worst fear realized.</p><p>He couldn’t fucking <em>move. </em>He couldn’t save them.</p><p><em>“He’s so small,” </em>Vincent had said and tapped the baby’s nose with the tip of his finger. <em>“We’ll see what he grows up to be.”</em></p><p>Tora opened his eyes; they burned with tears and he pinched at them with his thumb and pointer finger. “Slept in front of the door the rest of the night,” he finally said, his shoulders slumping forward. “The way I woke up swingin’… I could’ve hurt her. Hurt Bean. Now I can’t sleep without a big pile of pillows between us.”</p><p>Tora sighed. “I know he wasn’t here today, hurtin’ her,” he told Quincey. “I <em>know </em>that. But she was bleedin’, I could hear his voice in my head and I just… I couldn’t fuckin’ <em>move</em>, Quince. He wasn’t here but <em>he might as well’ve been.”</em></p><p>There was silence for a long moment as they sat side by side, sharing air, gazing out at the field across the street. In his mind, Tora lit a cigarette and took a mental drag, his breath shaking as he let out a long exhale.</p><p>Finally, Quincey turned his head and looked at his brother.</p><p>“He’s only here if we let him be,” he told Tora softly.</p><p>Tora nodded slowly. He didn’t want to <em>let </em>Vincent do anything, be anything to him. He’d spent too much of his life that way, just <em>letting. </em></p><p>“Ya ever think about him?” Tora murmured. “Or… fuck, I dunno, miss him? I mean, he was yer da-“</p><p>Quincey cut him off. “Sometimes,” he admitted, his eyes following an ant on the asphalt. “Mostly, I think about when I was little and he was actually <em>around. </em>Days at the beach, buying me toys, when he came to my lacrosse game that one time.”</p><p>“But then… then I remember what he did to you, what he made you do when <em>you </em>were little and I’m glad he’s gone. Alone in some shitty little cell, no contact with the outside world. No family.” Quincey’s breath left his mouth in a sharp hitch. “I don’t miss him as much as I would’ve missed you.”</p><p>More silence.</p><p>“I’m taking Jonathan’s last name, you know.” Tora’s eyes flitted to Quincey’s. “Balthuman will die with him. Everything he had, everything he <em>did </em>will die with him.”</p><p>“He doesn’t <em>get </em>to win,” Quincey whispered, his bottom lip trembling. “<em>We </em>do, by living well and loving hard. I mean, look around, honey,” he said and gestured toward the house behind them, at Jonathan’s pickup truck parked along the curb. “We’ve <em>won.</em>”</p><p>Tora swallowed hard. He was right. In this life, there wasn’t much he’d done right. He’d lost a lot: parents, his freedom, siblings, friends. But what he’d fought for, what he’d built… This was reward. <em>This </em>was what he’d been made for.</p><p>Not letting. Being.</p><p>
  <em>Having.</em>
</p><p>“I think part of you is scared to be a dad,” Quincey said and the corner of his mouth twitched up in a smile. “And it’s okay to be scared. I mean, you don’t know shit about <em>shit</em>, honey.” Quincey laughed as Tora swung lightheartedly at the back of his brother’s head.</p><p>“But you’ll learn. And you’ll be everything he wasn’t. You already are.”</p><p>The world was swimming in front of him; Tora blinked back the hot tears that were threatening to spill down his face. He looked at his brother, clapped one hand on the back of his neck.</p><p>“Thanks, Quince.”</p><p>“Anytime.” Quincey stared hard at Tora for a moment, his eyes eventually zeroing in on the side of his neck. “Hey-“</p><p>The swish of feet in the grass interrupted him and they turned to see Jonathan’s long legs striding up to them.</p><p>“Poppy’s okay, the bleeding’s stopped,” the Dutch man said in his deep accent. “Now Gyu’s teaching her how to put parental blocks on the tv.”</p><p>Quincey’s eyebrows furrowed. “A little soon for that, isn’t it? The baby isn’t going to-“</p><p>“Not for the baby. For him.” Jonathan pointed down at Tora, his blue eyes twinkling. “Sorry, dumb joke.”</p><p>Tora’s face cracked into a smile. Christ, the taller man was so awkward, but he was a good guy.</p><p>“Thanks for takin’ care of her, Jonathan,” Tora told his brother-in-law. “Appreciate it.”</p><p>“Of course,” Jonathan replied with a nod. “We’re family.”</p><p>“Um, honeypot, would you mind taking in some of those boxes?” Quincey asked his fiance, hooking his thumb in the direction of Gyu’s truck in the driveway. “We’ve just been working all day and we’re <em>so exhausted</em>. Could use a little more of a break, you know?”</p><p>“Sure,” he said and ruffled Quincey’s hair as he walked past him.</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes. “<em>We’ve </em>been workin’ all day? Haven’t seen ya lift more than a Kleenex since ya-“</p><p>“Why do you still have that ugly thing on your neck?” Quincey asked suddenly, jabbing his finger into the side of Tora’s throat.</p><p>Tora slapped at his brother’s hand. “What the fuc-“</p><p>“Why haven’t you had it removed?” Quincey asked, his voice grating, low and serious.</p><p>A deep sigh dragged out of Tora’s mouth. “Not like I haven’t been thinkin’ ‘bout it but… honestly, money. Never saved much ‘til I moved in with Poppy. Then it was the engagement ring, the wedding, the house, now the baby. I’m helpin’ Alice pay off the medical bills from her heart surgery and…” Tora rubbed a hand over his face and let it trail across his scalp, his fingers catching in his hair.</p><p>“Just thought spendin’ money on my life with Poppy was more important than removin’ the brand. Gotta start pushin’ more money back. Don’t want my kid to see it. Ever.”</p><p>Quincey reached up and plucked Tora’s hand from his hair. He wrapped both of his hands around Tora’s fingers and gave them a hard squeeze.</p><p>“Nibling won’t ever see it,” Quincey told him. “I promise.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Welp, that’s it,” Poppy said as she slipped inside the entry way and closed the door behind her. “Aside from picking up Cal from Avery’s tomorrow, we’re done.”</p><p>Tora’s eyes roamed across the room in front of them, over the little city of tote bag forts and cardboard skyscrapers that stretched from wall to wall in their living room. He cocked an eyebrow and smirked at his wife.</p><p>“Okay, well, not <em>done </em>done,” she huffed. “Done with the worst part, in my opinion. I <em>really</em> don’t like packing.”</p><p>“Yeah?” Tora asked as he wandered over to her, sidestepping the piles of their belongings. “What <em>do </em>ya like?”</p><p>“I like unpacking,” she said, watching him carefully as he came to a stop in front of her. “Making sure everything has a place.”</p><p>“Mmm. Ya know, the bed’s already got a place.”</p><p>“Oh really?”</p><p>“Mmmhmm. S’all set up and everythin’.” Tora leaned in, his nose skimming against hers. He could taste her breath on his lips.</p><p>“Uuuh… um, b-before we do <em>that</em>, do you mind if I unpack just <em>one </em>box?”</p><p>Tora’s breath left him in a huff and he squinted down at her. “Seriously?”</p><p>“Yeah, seriously.”</p><p>Feisty, <em>stubborn </em>ass little woman.</p><p>He threw his hands up in defeat. “Fine, pick one and we’ll unpack it.”</p><p>Without hesitation, Poppy shimmied her way through their belongings and plucked a box up from the floor. Tora followed closely behind her and scowled when she turned around.</p><p>“Relax, Mr. Grumpy. It’s not heavy,” she giggled and then bit down on her bottom lip. “It’s… it’s a balloon. With our baby’s gender on it.”</p><p>Tora’s heart hitched in his chest. “Ya mean… you have it right… there?”</p><p>At their last appointment, the doctor had written the baby’s sex down on a piece of paper, folded it in half and sent it home with them. They’d debated opening it as soon as they sat down in the car, but in the end decided they preferred to be surprised by someone they loved.</p><p>The last he knew, they’d mailed the little piece of paper to Eleanor and were still waiting to hear back.</p><p>Poppy nodded. “Mmmhmm. Granny sent it along with Dani when she came over last night to help us finish packing. I don’t <em>think</em> she was supposed to tell me it was a balloon, but you know how she is with surprises.”</p><p>Tora swallowed thickly. “Uh huh. So um… ya wanna do it here?”</p><p>“Hmm… why don’t we take it up to the nursery? I’ll even let you carry it,” Poppy teased and stuck her tongue out at him.</p><p>“Kay, brat,” he said and shifted the carton from her arms. He let Poppy lead the way, admiring the way her body moved as she sashayed up the staircase in front of him. Once they reached the hall, she turned into the second doorway on the right.</p><p>She flicked on the overhead light and padded across the soft, gray carpet. A mountain of diapers and toys from Quincey were piled in one corner, including a giant teddy bear and a small, stuffed red t-rex, its black stitched eyes squinted in anger.</p><p>Tora plunked the box down in the middle of the room and stared at it. The top flaps were folded in on each other and it reminded him of that weird cootie catcher game Poppy liked to play with scrap pieces of paper.</p><p>
  <em>Pick a color. Pink or blue?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>P-I-N-K.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>B-L-U-E.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>What will you be?</em>
</p><p>“Ready?” Poppy asked as she curled her fingers beneath one flap.</p><p>Tora peered over at his wife.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck.</em>
</p><p>Was it possible there was a balloon out there that just said <strong>IT’S A HEALTHY BABY!</strong>?</p><p>Or maybe even <strong>THE GENDER DOESN’T MATTER. YOU’RE GOING TO BE A GREAT DAD!</strong></p><p>He doubted it.</p><p>Tora lowered himself to the floor and let his knees sink into the plush carpet. He felt like he could barely support himself. He tucked his hand beneath an opposite flap.</p><p>“Ready,” he whispered.</p><p>At the same time, they tugged at the cardboard until the edges furled away from the center. They both peeked inside and Poppy squealed.</p><p>
  <em>Blue. </em>
</p><p>A shiny, blue balloon with safari animals parading proudly around the words <strong>IT’S A BOY! </strong></p><p>Poppy skirted past the box and launched herself into Tora’s arms. “We’re having a boy!” she shrieked and peppered his cheek with kisses. “Oh my gosh, our son is going to be so handsome, sweet and wonderful, just like his dad!”</p><p>Tora gritted his teeth against the voice that filled his head just then; it was fainter than before but still familiar, unmistakable.</p><p>
  <em>Son. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Don’t fuck this up, son.”</em>
</p><p>Poppy’s mouth moved from his cheek to his neck and suddenly her breath was warm against his lips.</p><p><em>I won’t</em>, he thought as Poppy’s kisses seared into him, his mouth, his mind, his doubts.</p><p>
  <em>You know how I know that? </em>
</p><p>They stood and she gripped his hand in hers, tugging at it, leading him into their new bedroom.</p><p>
  <em>Because you’re not here. And she is.</em>
</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Two Weeks Later</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Can I come upstairs yet?” Poppy’s voice called to Tora from the lower level of their home. “You’re making an awful lot of noise up there and I’m getting curious!”</p><p>He chuckled around the long nail in his mouth. He pinched it from between his lips and braced the tip against the pencil mark he’d made on their bedroom wall.</p><p>“Gimme one more second, ya nosy lil’ hamster,” he hollered back at her and pounded the nail down until half of it protruded from the wall behind their bed. Satisfied with its placement, he set the hammer down on the floor and hefted the large, stained wood wall hanging up from where it was leaning against their closet door. After a couple of minutes of adjusting and realigning, it settled securely against the nail heads he’d hammered into the studs of their wall.</p><p>Tora rounded the room to the foot of their queen bed and heaved it forward until it was flush against the wall hanging. He stood back for a moment and surveyed it with his hands on his hips. It was all even, completely straight.</p><p>He stepped across the hall then and darted into the nursery; he adjusted the wood carving on the gray bookshelf so it was facing the door the way he wanted. His eyes flitted once around the room, at the ever-growing pile of toys and clothes from Quincey, the crib mattress that had been delivered earlier in the week, their copy of the book <em>Oh, the Places You'll Go! </em>resting on the cushion of the beige overstuffed recliner in the corner.</p><p>That corner had rapidly become his favorite place in their new house; he loved curling up in it with Poppy as he read to her or helped her make plans for the layout of the nursery.</p><p>One day, he’d be curling up in that same recliner with their son, reading books to him and helping him plan the layout of his life. Tora smiled at the thought before retreating into the hall.</p><p>“All right, nosy ass,” Tora called down to Poppy. “Come on up.”</p><p>Tora heard an excited squeal, followed by “<em>Come on, Callie, let’s go! Are you excited?</em>” and the metal tinkling of Cal’s collar as his wife and the Cavapoo climbed the carpeted stairs. When Poppy appeared at the top of the staircase, she was panting slightly.</p><p>“Whew!” Poppy laughed and propped her back against the wall.</p><p>“Ya okay?” Tora asked as he took two steps toward her.</p><p>“Yeah, just… Pregnancy and stairs aren’t exactly the best of friends. Who knew?”</p><p>“Hmmpf. Lil’ hitchhiker’s weighin’ ya down, huh?” he said and spread his palm out across her rounded belly, hoping to feel his son move. Poppy had felt him shift and kick a couple of times now, but as soon as Tora would slide his hand over her stomach, the baby would go still.</p><p>After the last time it’d happened, he must have looked pretty dejected, because Poppy gripped his hand. “Don’t take it personally. He’s just being stubborn like his mom,” she’d giggled. “You’ll get to feel him, I promise.”</p><p>Tora had nodded, smiled and hoped it was sooner rather than later.</p><p>“Yeah, he’s starting to get heavy,” Poppy told him. “It’s almost like his dad is six foot three or something.” She grinned up at him.</p><p>“Pfft.” Tora’s hand shifted from her belly to her fingers; he interlaced them with his and gently tugged her forward. “C’mon, got a couple of things for ya to see.”</p><p>He led her into the nursery first and lightly nudged her forward. She paused in front of the gray bookshelf and peered around the room. Callum trotted past their legs to the mountain of toys in the corner, sniffing eagerly at the grumpy stuffed dinosaur.</p><p>“Ah!” Tora scolded him. “Cal, got ya own fuckin’ pile of Uncle Quincey toys downstairs. Don’t need the baby’s, too.”</p><p>Callum ignored him and began to paw at the red stuffed animal.</p><p>Tora released Poppy’s hand and clapped his palms together loudly. “Callum!” The dog jumped and spun around, launching himself out of the nursery.</p><p>“Christ,” Tora murmured. “Lil’ shit needs to listen.”</p><p>Poppy giggled. “They are going to get into <em>so</em> much trouble together,” she said. “Him and the baby.”</p><p>Tora sighed. “Fuck, don’t jinx us, sweetheart. Now, ya see anythin’ different?” he asked her.</p><p>“No? I don’t think s… <em>oh</em>.” Poppy let out a soft moan of surprise as her gaze found the four-inch wood carved T-Rex on the bookshelf, its roaring mouth facing the door.</p><p>She immediately picked it up and turned it over and over in her hands, then peered at him over her shoulder. “Oh my gosh. You <em>made </em>this?”</p><p>He couldn’t help the proud smile that bloomed in the corners of his mouth; he’d worked on it in the garage every night for the past week, cutting his fingers as he carved, shaped and sanded the damn thing to within an inch of its life.</p><p>“Yeah,” he said around a grin. “S’one of the celestial animals.”</p><p>She giggled as her fingers continued to dance over the smooth curve of the dinosaur’s back. “Tora, I don’t think dinosaurs are-“</p><p>“’Course they are, Bobby,” he smirked. “Just like the lil’ tortoise. Ya set the t-rex by the door and it’ll protect him.”</p><p>“Well, it sounds like you know what you’re talking about. I believe you,” she murmured and returned the t-rex to its place on the bookshelf, making sure to position it so its head was once again turned toward the doorway.</p><p>Her eyes glistened as she blinked up at him.</p><p>“Ya think he’ll like it?” Tora asked.</p><p>“Yeah,” she whispered as a couple of tears dripped down her cheeks. “He’s going to love it.”</p><p>Tora swiped away the droplets on her face with his thumbs and smiled down at her. “C’mon sweetheart, got one more thing to show ya.”</p><p>He ushered her into the master bedroom and stood silently by as she stared at the new headboard hanging behind their bed.</p><p>“This is what you’ve been working on?” she whispered as she reached a hand out and touched one of the dark stained wood planks.</p><p>“Yeah, when I wasn’t workin’ on the t-rex, I was building this. Um… it’s mostly made out of the wood from our wedding arbor. The edging is scrap lumber I had on hand, but the body of it is from the arbor.”</p><p>Poppy was quiet, <em>too </em>quiet for Tora’s liking as she lightly dragged her finger over the pattern of the wood grain. Fuck, was she upset? He’d hated the idea of the arbor just sitting in storage in their garage, never being looked at or used again. Maybe he shouldn’t have done it or should’ve asked her before he tore it apart.</p><p>“Bobby, are ya ups… I mean, do ya like it?” he finally asked, terrified of her answer.</p><p>Poppy turned around and before Tora could blink, she was pulling his face down to hers, crushing their mouths together and pawing at his shirt. Within a matter of moments, they were naked on the bed and she was in front of him on all fours as he moved inside of her, his hands tightly cupping her hips as the mattress knocked into the headboard.</p><p>Poppy peeped over her shoulder at him, her ponytail bouncing wildly between her shoulders. “<em>Harder</em>,” she moaned and roughly rocked her hips backwards, meeting his next thrust.</p><p>The edges of Tora’s vision went black as pleasure coursed through him. “Careful, Bobby,” he huffed as he slicked in and out of her. “Don’t wanna put a dent in the kid’s head.”</p><p>Poppy fell forward onto her elbows and her whole body shook with laughter. “Oh my god, Tora, you’re not… you <em>won’t</em>,” she giggled. “Just… <em>please </em>don’t stop.”</p><p>With his thumb pressed firmly against her clit and his cock buried deep inside of her, Poppy rode out her orgasm with a long, low moan. Tora was triggered by her release and he came hard with his hips flush against her ass and his hands scrabbling over her back.</p><p>They laid down beside each other afterward, sweaty and breathing hard on the rumpled sheets. When Tora’s ability to speak came back to him, he turned his head to Poppy and grinned. “So I take it ya like the headboard, then?”</p><p>Poppy’s eyes squinted closed as a laugh escaped her mouth. “<em>Yes, </em>I love it. I wanted to test it out,” she giggled and reached up to slap one palm against the wood planks behind their heads. “See how it would hold up.”</p><p>Tora chuckled. “Glad it passed ya lil’ test, brat,” he said and wrapped his arms around her. “Was scared to death ya were gonna be pissed at me for rippin’ the arbor apart.”</p><p>“Not at all,” she murmured and slid her hand along one of his arms. “It’s perfect. I’m glad we’ll be able to see it every day.”</p><p>Tora wasn’t sure how long they laid there, tangled around each other, laughing, gently prodding at their son, trying to get him to move and then tossing around ideas for names. Eventually, Poppy sat up on the bed, stretched her arms high above her head and padded toward the adjoining master bathroom.</p><p>She paused in the doorway and tilted her head to look back at him.</p><p>“Since I’m already naked, do you want to help me with the cocoa butter?” she asked.</p><p>Tora propped himself up on his elbows. She’d been asking him to do this lately, usually after her showers. Supposed to keep her from getting stretch marks or something. He didn’t give a shit about stretch marks; she’d always been beautiful to him, even more so since she’d been carrying their baby. She always fucking would be.</p><p>But he wasn’t one to complain when she called him upstairs; he was <em>all</em> too eager to spread the sweet-smelling lotion over all the places of her body she couldn’t see or reach easily, mainly her ass.</p><p>Sometimes, nothing happened. More often than not, it ended with them fooling around. They’d just had sex, but he could be ready to go again soon.</p><p>“Comin’,” he said and vaulted his naked body off the bed, lunging after her as she giggled from the bathroom.</p><p>Fuck, he loved pregnancy.</p><p>---</p><p>It was early afternoon when Quincey’s yellow sports car squealed up to the curb outside of their house. Tora’s younger brother had ordered him not to make any plans for that particular Saturday but refused to tell him where they were going or what they were doing.</p><p>It still felt strange to Tora, sliding into the passenger seat beside Quincey. Not that long ago, he’d carted his brother everywhere, no questions, just orders. It was nice to be the one chauffeured around for a change, even if he <em>did </em>have to listen to the blonde man’s fucking weird ass music.</p><p>“<em>Get yourself to the butterfly lounge, find yourself a big laaaadyyyy…” </em>Quincey sang loudly as they screeched into a parking spot in front of a plain white bricked building, roughly half an hour from Tora and Poppy’s new house.</p><p>Quincey killed the car’s engine and Tora breathed a sigh of relief as the music cut to silence. “Thank fuck,” he grumbled. “Don’t understand how the hell ya listen to that shit.”</p><p>“Oh, you think <em>my</em> music is annoying?” Quincey chuckled. “Just wait until Nibling wants to listen to ‘Baby Shark’ a thousand times on repeat.”</p><p>Tora squinted as his brother. “The fuck is ‘Baby Shark’?”</p><p>“Oh, honey. You’ll find out.”</p><p>Quincey ducked his head and pulled his body from the car. Tora did the same and peered at his brother over the roof of the sports car. “What is this place, Quince?”</p><p>The blonde man said nothing, just pointed up at the colorful sign looming over the building’s metal rooftop.</p><p>
  <em>Vanishing Point Laser Tattoo Removal. </em>
</p><p>Tora’s breath caught in his chest. “Uh, I appreciate it, but I don’t really have the money right now.”</p><p>“I know you don’t, but I do,” Quincey said and pulled his Ray Bans away from his blue eyes. “And we’re going to get our brands removed together.”</p><p>Tora cupped his forehead in his hand; he could feel the worry lines pull together across his skin as he fought back the lump in his throat. “Quince… s’too much.”</p><p>“Honey, it’s <em>never </em>too much. It’ll never be <em>enough</em>. You don’t want Nibling to see your clan tattoo and I don’t want that either.” Quincey chewed at his bottom lip.</p><p>“I don’t want him to see <em>any </em>of it and that includes mine. So we’re going in there today for a consultation and I’m footing the bill. You can try and stop me, but they already have my credit card on file.”</p><p>Tora stood silently across from Quincey for a long moment, this man who wasn’t his brother by blood, but by choice. After the trials, they could have walked away from each other, cut off all contact. Instead, they continued to walk <em>toward</em> one another, choosing each other again and again.</p><p>Jonathan’s words rang in Tora’s ears; they echoed through his mind before settling in the middle of his chest.</p><p>
  <em>"Of course. We’re family.”</em>
</p><p>When Tora was a five year old orphan and plucked off the streets by Vincent Balthuman, the crime lord had gained his trust by grooming him, bribing him with the promise of family.</p><p>Standing here now, staring at Quincey in all his annoyingly bright, patterned clothes, his hair slicked back in a perfect coif, his body turned toward Tora, his arms wide open with generosity, Tora realized it was the one and only promise Vincent had ever kept.</p><p>“Well?” Quincey asked and gestured toward the building. “Ready to say goodbye?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Tora told him and slammed his car door shut. “Yeah, I am.”</p><p>---</p><p>Kid, you moved houses before you were born</p><p>And moved all of us to tears.</p><p>You moved in your mom's belly</p><p>All this and you're not even here!</p><p> </p><p>Got my tattoo removed for you, Bean</p><p>I finally set myself free.</p><p>You know, I fuc- freaking helped make you</p><p>But it feels like you're the one leading me.</p><p> </p><p>I can't wait for you to get here</p><p>And see what you're all about. </p><p>I don't know what places you'll take me</p><p>But I'm excited to find out.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fun fact: the word "ikigai" is Japanese for "reason for being" :)</p><p>The song Quincey is screeching in the car is "Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)" by Mika because of COURSE he would.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. We're Hoping It's a Dinosaur- Third Trimester</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Tora and Poppy prepare to become parents. </p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Last trimester, baby! There's a little bit of smut, some Quincey and also some things that you might not be expecting ;) </p><p>I have several of you to thank for requesting Poppy and Tora's pregnancy:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Audrey, RaquelSousa, Spotlightgirlontherun, Rollie89, Foxesinboxes, and Mackgurl2020. Zoety, there's a little something in here for you, too ;) </p><p>Special shoutout to two of my favorite moms, CopyPastel and OneAndOnlyTako for screaming pregnancy/birthing advice to me in all caps. Their words of wisdom have helped me to portray Poppy's pregnant journey as accurately as I can and I'm forever grateful &lt;3</p><p>As always, much love to my ladies in the PWWSTS chat. You're my people!</p><p>I hope you all enjoy this final stage of our favorite couple's first pregnancy! </p><p>Love you all and see you soon, </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>Come hang out with me on Instagram: @peanut.butterandchelly<br/>I LOVE chatting with you all!</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Goodnight stroller,</p><p>Goodnight high chair.</p><p>Goodnight piles of baby shit</p><p>Everywhere.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Third Trimester</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Okay, Tora,” Poppy said, her voice muffled from the face mask she wore. “What do you think so far?” Paintbrush in hand, she swooped her arm to the side in a parallel motion, gesturing toward the half-finished mural on the nursery wall.</p><p>Tora glanced up at his wife from the beige recliner in the corner, his guitar straddled in his lap and his fingers fluttering over the instrument’s neck as he tuned it. He plucked the guitar pick from between his teeth to answer her.</p><p>“Looks great, Bobby,” he told her honestly. “Bean’s gonna love it.”</p><p>He couldn’t see it behind her mask, but he knew Poppy was smiling; the swell of her cheeks rose just above the mask and her big brown eyes wrinkled up at the corners. He returned her grin as his gaze swept over the painted wall in question.</p><p>It was fucking badass.</p><p>Behind her were half-completed light green mountains and hills, accompanied by the beginnings of a soft blue sky. There was an erupting volcano in the corner with pencil sketched silhouettes of three pterodactyls hovering overhead. The outline of a large stegosaurus was munching on a low tree in the opposite corner and a red tyrannosaurus rex towered over the place where the crib would be pushed against the wall.</p><p>Fuck, if their son didn’t like it, Tora would move into the room in a heartbeat.</p><p>“So I’m thinking about putting one of the snake plants in that corner”- Poppy pointed toward the stegosaurus- “so that maybe it looks like he’s eating it? And then up <em>here </em>maybe…” she trailed off as she tilted her head to the ceiling, more than likely painting more dinosaurs and clouds in her mind.</p><p>Tora chuckled. They’d never discussed the theme of the nursery; all he knew was that his wife had come home one day and asked him to help her carry small cans of lead-free, low odor paint into the house. He’d been so floored that she’d actually <em>asked </em>for his help for once that he never even asked what the paint was for.</p><p>“I’m going to paint the nursery,” she’d told him when they brought the final metal tins inside. “Tomorrow.”</p><p>He shouldn’t have been surprised; for the last week, she’d gone crazy trying to pull all the newborn items and nursery together. Entire cities constructed of piles of baby shit had cropped up all over the house: a plastic tote full of freshly sanitized pacifiers, bottles and nipples had been perched on the coffee table for a week straight, all the infant clothes they’d received from the baby shower were clean and folded in heaps on top of their bedroom dresser and it seemed like on every surface he looked, there was some new toy from Uncle fucking Quincey occupying the space.</p><p>He’d asked Poppy’s granny about it while he’d been on the phone with her the previous week; was it normal for her to be so active and goddamn <em>insane </em>this late into her pregnancy?</p><p>Granny had laughed at him and told him it was something called “nesting”; it was an instinct all expectant mothers experienced. It was Poppy’s way of preparing their home, their life for their son.</p><p>“Right now, think of her like a little bird, flitting around, building a nest for your egg,” Granny told him. “She might fly too fast, take or move things you don’t want her to, she may squawk and peck at you, but it’s all out of love and slight panic for the baby. Don’t take it too personally.”</p><p>“Gonna stick her bird ass in a cage soon if she doesn’t take it easy,” he’d grumbled, which sent Granny into a fit of giggles.</p><p>Eventually, thanks to Poppy’s sudden snap of pregnant hamster bird energy, they’d gotten around to arranging all the furniture in the nursery the way they wanted, laid down a multicolored rug and found a place for every toy, diaper and tiny outfit.</p><p>The other rooms of their house were not spared from her whirlwind of energy, either. She’d torn through the Laundry Room Bermuda Triangle and somehow managed to find and match <em>all </em>of their missing pairs of socks together. Reorganized and alphabetized the spice rack, dusted behind and under the refrigerator after she’d asked him to move it out of the way for her…</p><p>Jesus Christ, he was wiped just <em>thinking </em>about all the shit they’d accomplished in the last few weeks.</p><p>Though he was exhausted, he’d still offered to help her paint the nursery; like hell he was going to miss out on a single part of preparing their world for the baby. When she told him she wanted to paint a mural, something he didn’t know shit about and had zero skill for, he’d primed the wall for her and then dragged his guitar into the room to “keep her entertained.”</p><p>And <em>maybe</em> to keep an eye on her, make sure she took enough breaks and never stretched or bent over too far.</p><p>Tora picked away at the strings of his 1968 Yamaha acoustic guitar and once he was satisfied with its sound, he arranged his fingers over the neck, settled the plastic pick in the grip of his other hand and slowly began to strum.</p><p>
  <em>"Ya know it ain’t easy for these thoughts here to leave me… There’s no words to describe it…”</em>
</p><p>Barely audible over his singing, Poppy’s voice drifted through the sun and air of the nursery. “Mmmm, I love this song,” she hummed as she dipped her brush into a tin of dark blue paint.</p><p>Tora laughed through his nose and paused his hand over the strings. “I know,” he told her and repositioned the guitar on his lap to pick up where he’d left off.</p><p>Since he’d sang and played for her on that Christmas in their apartment, he’d become more comfortable and confident with the guitar, with singing and strumming simultaneously. Nowadays he sang to her often, but very rarely used the instrument; it had been packed away in the garage for awhile and with everything going on, he hadn’t had the urge to pull it out until recently.</p><p>He was happy she still liked to hear him play.</p><p>
  <em>"In French or in English, ‘cuz diamonds they fade and flowers they bloom… And I’m tellin’ you these feelings won’t go away… They’ve been knockin’ me sidewa-“</em>
</p><p>“Oooh my gosh,” Poppy moaned, cutting off his next words as both of her tiny hands flew to her rounded belly.</p><p>Tora immediately stood, cocking the guitar against the wall. “Bobby, ya okay? Bean okay?”</p><p>“Ye-yeah, he was… wow, out of nowhere, he just started kicking me like crazy,” she murmured around a laugh.</p><p>Tora grinned and took a step forward, stretching his hand wide over the baby. He cupped his palm over the center of Poppy’s distended stomach, then rubbed it from one side to the other, desperately seeking the movements of his son.</p><p>Nothing.</p><p>“I’m sorry, he stopped,” she told him. “If he starts doing it again, I’ll let you know, okay?”</p><p>Tora’s shoulders slumped in defeat as he removed his hand from her. “’Kay.”</p><p>He backed into the chair and dropped heavily onto the cushion. Fucking Christ, he wanted to feel his baby, feel what Poppy felt, even if it was just <em>once. </em>Poppy told him constantly to not take it to heart, but there was some part of Tora that felt the baby was <em>avoiding </em>him.</p><p>Stubborn ass little shit.</p><p>Tora once again settled the guitar across his legs and plucked at the strings. <em>“These feelings won’t go away… They’ve been knockin’ me sideways. They’ve been knockin’ me out, ba-“</em></p><p>Suddenly, Poppy wrenched the mask from her face and tossed it to the floor.</p><p>“Tora, <em>he’s doing it again,</em>” Poppy hissed and waved her hands at him. He pulled his fingers from the guitar strings and stood the instrument up along the wall. He practically lunged across the room; Poppy immediately grasped one of his hands and pressed it against the slope of her belly.</p><p>Faintly, like the tiniest high-five, the most fragile heartbeat, Tora felt his son kick directly into the center of his palm.</p><p>Tears instantly clouded his vision. “Holy shit,” he whispered as his son continued to move beneath his hand.</p><p>He was feeling him. He was <em>finally </em>feeling him, feeling on the outside what Poppy was feeling on the inside.</p><p>“Whoooa, oh my gosh. He’s moving around like crazy. Tora, go sit back down and start over, I think he likes it!” Poppy said and pointed to his guitar in the corner.</p><p>“Really?” he choked out, unable to pull his hand away from his tumbling son.</p><p>
  <em>The baby liked hearing him play, too?</em>
</p><p>“Yeah, come on,” she said and grasped his hand in hers. He followed his waddling wife to the corner, where he took a seat and gripped the guitar tightly in his hands. Poppy stood closely beside him and placed one hand on his shoulder as his fingers flitted across the strings.</p><p>“<em>These feelings won’t go away… They’ve been knockin’ me sideways… I keep thinkin’ in a moment that time will take them away…”</em></p><p>“Wooow,” Poppy laughed and gestured at Tora to give her his hand again. She splayed it over the center of her stomach, where he could feel the wild flutters of their son rolling around inside of her.</p><p>“He likes it, huh?” Tora breathed and shifted his hand to follow the baby’s movements.</p><p>“Yeah, he gets his good taste from me,” Poppy teased and then Tora felt the slightest pressure, the most fragile heartbeat of his wife dropping a kiss on the top of his head.</p><p>---</p><p>Goodnight Vincent,</p><p>Goodnight clan.</p><p>Goodnight Tiger</p><p>And goodnight brand.</p><p>---</p><p>Poppy’s body wasn’t the only one going through changes.</p><p>Tora stood in front of the bathroom mirror and used his fingernail to pry up one of the corners of the fresh bandage on his neck. He hissed as it pulled at some of the fine hairs there and once it was off, he tossed it in the garbage bin beside the sink.</p><p>He and Quincey’d had their third removal session earlier that day and the technician remarked that the brand was fading nicely. She’d told Tora and his brother that black was one of the easiest colors to remove and it probably didn’t hurt that he’d never bothered to get that particular tattoo touched up.</p><p>Each session hurt like a bitch; he knew he’d never get used to the feeling of the laser scorching the thin skin that stretched across his neck, but it was worth it. He’d experienced far worse pain at the hands of the person who’d forced the brand on him.</p><p>Looking at it now in the low light of their en suite bathroom, Tora realized how obscured and faded it really was. There were no more sharp curved lines or small, perfect circles; it just looked like an angry bruise that was trying to heal.</p><p>
  <em>Leave no trace. </em>
</p><p>Now that he was out of the clan and was a husband, about to be a father, it pained him to realize how much he’d lost at the hands of Vincent Balthuman. <em>Tora</em> had built himself into the man standing in this house today and though he wasn’t around to steal any more moments or stages of his life, Vincent had still taken who he <em>was </em>and every possibility of who he could <em>be. </em></p><p>The other day, as he and Poppy sat in the nursery and rifled through a list of possible baby names, Tora thought about how he’d never known his <em>own </em>name. Somewhere out there was a birth certificate with the name of the person he was supposed to be, but he doubted he’d ever see it. Vincent had forced the name of “Tora” on him, the first step toward molding him into the predator the crime lord wanted him to be.</p><p>His mother’s maiden name, Murakami, was the only one Tora was allowed to cling to. As long as it wasn’t Balthuman, Vincent didn’t give a fuck what his last name was on paper.</p><p>Christ, he didn’t even know his own brother’s birth name; “Goliath” was the name he’d designated for himself and Tora had always given him a hard time about it when they were growing up.</p><p>“Ya know how that fuckin’ story ends?” Tora had asked him. “Hate to be the one to tell ya, but Goliath doesn’t win shit. Should change it to David.”</p><p>“Eh,” his brother mumbled around the butt of a cigarette. “Doesn’t sound as badass. ‘Sides, I’m gonna turn it around.”</p><p>Sometimes Tora wondered if Goliath hadn’t sealed his fate when he chose his own name.</p><p>For years Tora dreamed of the day he’d be free of the clan, free to live his life the way he wanted, free to change his name to something he was proud of. But Poppy had fallen in love with <em>Tora</em> and <em>that</em> was who he always wanted to be, the man she’d decided was worthy of her.</p><p>Their son deserved a strong name, one that he’d grow into, do justice to and be proud of. They’d gotten distracted by putting the nursery together before they’d come up with a solid idea, but they’d figure it out soon enough.</p><p>Tora scooped his long hair up into a bun and dipped his fingers into the small container of hydrocortisone cream Poppy had bought for him. He rubbed the salve into the tender, swollen flesh of his neck and sighed as he screwed the cap back onto the canister.</p><p>One more session to go.</p><p>Tora clicked off the light and padded into their dimly lit bedroom, where Poppy was propped up against a mountain of pillows and balancing the spine of a book on her belly. Callum was nestled beside her, his fluffy head resting on the side of her stomach.</p><p>Over the past few months of her pregnancy, the Cavapoo had become even <em>more</em> attached to Poppy. The dog was constantly up her ass, following her around the house and whenever she paused for a rest, he was at the ready, cuddling close to her, nudging her swollen belly with his nose or plopping his head down on it.</p><p>It was cute but also annoying as hell; Tora literally had to drag the damn dog away from her at times to get his cuddles in with her, too.</p><p>He chuckled as he made his way over to the bed and slid beneath the sheets. “Whatcha readin’, sweetheart?” Tora asked. “Pride n’ Pregnancy?”</p><p>“I mean, kind of,” she laughed and angled the book toward him so he could read the cover.</p><p>
  <em>Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn. </em>
</p><p>“Pfft, haven’t ya read that one a million times by now?” Tora asked as he scooted closer to her. Callum grumbled as Tora gently pushed him toward the end of the bed. “Shut it, punk,” Tora grumbled back. “Ya know you don’t win this fight with me.”</p><p>“Often,” Poppy smirked. “’Ya know you don’t win this fight with me <em>often.</em>’”</p><p>“Yeah, well,” Tora said and kissed his wife’s shoulder. He stretched an arm out toward his nightstand and retrieved the bright yellow dad handbook Poppy had given him. He settled himself against Poppy’s arm and flipped to a page he had dog-eared, the introduction of the section to childbirth and ran his eyes over the first sentence.</p><p>He’d made it about five pages in when he heard his wife snap her book shut. She shuffled around in the bed and then he felt the warmth of her breath against the right side of his neck. Tora swallowed and licked his thumb, acting disinterested as he flipped to the next page of the book.</p><p>Poppy pressed an open mouth kiss to his throat. “Hi,” she murmured.</p><p>“Hey,” he responded nonchalantly, though if she were to look down, she’d notice the tent he was pitching under the blankets.</p><p>“Whatcha reading?” she asked as she grazed her lips along the shell of his ear.</p><p>He said nothing, just turned the book so she could read the cover.</p><p>“Haven’t you read that one a million times by now?” she asked as her fingers curled around the top of the spine, attempting to pry it from his grip.</p><p>Tora held on tight. “Yeah, but s’nothin’ wrong with being prepared, sweetheart,” he said and gently pulled the book from her hands, adjusting his shoulders so he was faced away from her.</p><p>He heard the slightest huff in the air behind him and chuckled to himself.</p><p>“Okay you thug, enough playing for you,” she said and yanked him toward her. He laughed and managed to set the book down on the bedside table before moving his hands to cup her hips as she shoved the blankets aside and straddled him.</p><p>With one foot, he gently prompted Callum to jump down from the bed and then situated himself beneath his wife. She was wearing one of his t-shirts and no shorts; even through the layers of their underwear, he could feel her intense heat pressing against his length. She was already <em>so </em>wet; this would more than likely be a quickie, but he’d fucking take it. He slept better after he’d been inside of her, anyway.</p><p>Poppy rocked herself slowly against him and let out a soft moan as Tora shifted his hand beneath her swollen belly and rolled his thumb over her clit. Poppy bucked as his fingers pushed her underwear aside and teased along her slick folds.</p><p>He watched her throw her head back as he curled one finger inside of her; she cried out and pivoted her hips in time with his hand as he plunged into her. She wasn’t able to move quite like she used to before she was pregnant, but fuck if she was any less sexy. Watching her come apart was his favorite thing about fucking her. He loved her moans, her cries, her whimpers, loved the validation of knowing that he was making her feel good.</p><p>Poppy began to pant breathlessly and suddenly pushed herself up onto her knees. Recognizing his cue, he shoved his boxers down his legs with one hand and then gripped the base of his cock, lining it up to her entrance.</p><p>She sunk onto him with a loud cry, inching down slowly until he was completely sheathed in her warmth. Tora squeezed his eyes shut against the pang of pleasure that coiled tightly in his groin. <em>Fuck, </em>how did she always feel so good, so tight?</p><p>Tora rocked his hips upward, the bottom of her belly grazing his pelvis as he slicked deeper inside of her. Poppy panted and braced her little hands against his chest as he did it again.</p><p>Suddenly, Poppy’s stomach was bearing down against his abs and he looked up to see her face pinched as she struggled to come forward.</p><p>“S’matter?” he asked, immediately filled with concern that he was hurting her or the baby.</p><p>“It’s- I just…. You feel so far away and I can’t <em>kiss </em>you,” she huffed as she rocked toward him, trying once again to reach his face. “My big belly is in the way. Oh god, I’m not crushing you, am I?”</p><p>Tora barked out a laugh. “Ain’t far away, sweetheart. Fuck, I’m <em>inside</em> of ya right now,” he chuckled. “And yer <em>not </em>crushin’ me. Ya feel fuckin’ great.”</p><p>“Ugh, okay. I just… I wanna kiss you. I want to feel closer to you,” she told him. “Can we change positions?”</p><p>“’Course,” he said and reluctantly removed his cock from her. She slid from his lap onto the mattress and stuffed a pillow against her back. He waited for her to get comfortable on her side, then wrapped one arm around her and kissed her deeply.</p><p>“Good?” he whispered as he pulled away from her.</p><p>Poppy’s eyes flickered open. “Yes,” she smiled and shifted her hips toward him.</p><p>Tora kissed her as he took his cock in his hand and slid back inside of her. Pleasure once again prickled in his groin and he could feel the skin of his balls beginning to tighten as he plunged into her.</p><p>“How’s that feel?” he rasped and pulled her close so he could press a kiss to her mouth.</p><p>“Um, it’s good,” she murmured. She bit her bottom lip and he frowned.</p><p>“Yer a bad liar,” he told her and stilled his movements. “S’wrong?”</p><p>“This angle just isn’t as comfortable as I thought it would be,” she admitted. “Can we try it with you behind me?”</p><p>“Sure, Bobby, third time’s a charm, right?” he chuckled and helped her as she readjusted the pillows and turned herself around on the bed.</p><p>Tora slipped one arm beneath her neck so it was cushioning her head and tightened his other hand around his cock. He rubbed its head against her lips and she whimpered as she wiggled her lower body into him. He eased himself inside her and then his hand moved to her hip, gripping her hard as he slid himself home.</p><p>“Oh god, <em>Tora</em>,” Poppy moaned and he felt her whole body shiver against him.</p><p>“Better?” he huffed out and nipped at the soft flesh of her earlobe.</p><p>“<em>Yes</em>,” she breathed and pushed her pelvis into him, meeting his next thrust. Tora’s eyes rolled back into his head and he pumped into her again, harder this time.</p><p>Tora kissed and nibbled at her shoulder, the place where her neck met her collarbone and he felt her ribcage vibrate against his torso as she hummed deeply with pleasure. The hand that was clutching her dipped to the flare of her hip, then down until his fingers reached her clit. He rolled them in small circles over her tiny bead and she fucking <em>squirmed</em>, panted his name helplessly.</p><p>She was close.</p><p>With one tiny hand gripped in his hair and her hips rolling forward to meet his fingers, Poppy came on a low moan, shuddering, writhing, her pussy pulsing around his cock as she let go. Once he was sure she’d finished, he quickened his pace, making each thrust count as he chased his own pleasure.</p><p>Afterward, when he pulled out from her, he hugged her tightly to him, running one hand along her side, then over the slope of her tummy in silent apology.</p><p>
  <em>Sorry about the earthquake, kid. </em>
</p><p>“Tora, would you mind helping me clean myself up?” she asked, her voice soft.</p><p>“Sure, sweetheart,” he said and carefully pulled her into a sitting position.</p><p>He’d been helping Poppy more with her personal hygiene lately; the bigger the baby had gotten, the more trouble she had shaving her legs and sometimes she was too tired and sore to stand long enough in the shower to wash her long hair.</p><p>So Tora had taken over and fucking loved it. Being in a warm, wet room with his wife while he took care of her reminded him of being in the shower with her in Fiji, <em>his favorite part. </em></p><p>Well, <em>second</em> favorite part now.</p><p>The first was bringing home one hell of a souvenir.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Three Days Later</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Um, could you just set it in that corner there? Oh, perfect! Doesn’t it look like he’s eating it?” Poppy asked, her voice high with excitement.</p><p>Tora backed up from the place where he’d just set a snake plant in front of the blue stegosaurus she’d painted and took a moment to study it. From a certain angle, it really did look like the dinosaur was taking a chomp out of one of their tallest plants.</p><p>“S’pretty cute, Bobby,” he told her. “Bean’s gonna love this room.”</p><p>“I hope so,” she said and moved to the bookshelf, where she trailed her hand along some waxy green cuttings from Tora’s ZZ plant, rooted and thriving inside a small terra cotta pot.</p><p>He smiled as he glanced around the space; it was a gray, rainy day and Poppy had asked him to help her move some of their plants into the nursery to brighten it up and she was right. There was something about living things that brought warmth, light and air to a room.</p><p>His smile softened as he realized that most of the ones they’d carried into their son’s room were from Tyson’s rare plant collection, including his urn. Tora wasn’t sure why he’d grabbed that one, but he did.</p><p>Being surrounded by them in a smaller space, with water droplets peppering the window outside caused Tora’s mind to drift to the day they’d put their friend to rest in the small glass greenhouse on his property.</p><p>Once Poppy had settled Tyson’s ashes inside the ceramic urn, Tora’s gaze landed on the metal work bench his friend had set up in the center of the structure. It was cold and the metallic surface reflected the white lights hanging overhead. The silver countertop was still scattered with soil, probably from the very last time he’d repotted some of his plants. As Tora peered more closely, he spotted a defined fingerprint in the dirt and swallowed.</p><p>It never got any easier, losing the people he cared about to the violence of his world.</p><p>Tora helped Poppy transplant the desert rose into the planter urn and together they tucked it into a box alongside several of Tyson’s rare houseplants. Gyu and Quincey followed them out of the glass enclosure, their own arms loaded with boxes of greenery, and Gyu’s voice lifted into the air.</p><p>“Gonna start rainin’,” he said and Tora tilted his head up to regard the darkening sky.</p><p>Not a minute after Gyu’s comment, the clouds opened up, scattering wind and water across the ground in front of them.</p><p>While the three men’s feet moved them quickly to Quincey’s sports car, Poppy paused in the middle of Tyson’s driveway, smiling and blinking hard as water dribbled down her bangs, her face and onto the tops of the houseplants she carried.</p><p>“C’mon Bobby, gonna get soaked,” Tora called out to her through the wall of rain between them.</p><p>“One second,” Poppy called back. “I’m just letting him water his plants one last time.”</p><p><em>It was no wonder they’d gotten along so fucking well</em>, Tora thought as he stared at Poppy now, moving her fingertips across the wide leaves of a white and green monstera plant. They were both so nurturing, so caring, freely offering their help, time and support to those who needed it most.</p><p>Joe had been responsible for turning Tora into a man, for helping him navigate the nature of the mafia life he’d been thrown into. He’d sworn at him, taught him how to fight properly, helped him tend to his wounds and even roughed him up a little when Tora refused to listen.</p><p>“If this is the only way to fuckin’ get through to ya, then so be it,” Joe had said one day as he gripped Tora by the collar. “I’ll speak ya goddamn language, kid.”</p><p>Not only had Joe taught him how to survive on the streets, he’d helped him cling on to some shred of humanity, some inkling of hope. “Know it feels all bad out there sometimes,” Joe said as their feet dangled off the edge of Alice’s back porch, their tattooed arms brushing against each other, “but it ain’t. Ya take the love that me and my ma give you, ya hold it in here-“ Joe balled a fist to his chest “-ya carry it with you out there and let it go. Spread it around, give it to the people who deserve it. They’re out there, I swear. And they’ll make themselves known.”</p><p>Tora had lost Joe young; too young and stubborn to ever go back and tell him that he was right, he’d found his people, the ones worthy of his true self. He’d been reunited with his brother, Goliath, felt an overwhelming urge to protect Gyu and even found stretches of peace with Quincey. He’d met Tyson shortly after Joe’s death and whatever good Joe had planted inside Tora, Tyson had helped to nurture and grow.</p><p>He talked to him about his damn plants any chance he could and though he didn’t give a fuck about them at the time, Tora sat and listened when no one else would. Looking back on it now, it was Tyson that had helped Tora nurture the ZZ plant and then helped him nurture his relationship with Poppy by helping him locate a tiger orchid, by agreeing to be her bodyguard, to treating her right and promising to keep her safe. A promise he did not live to keep, but Tora had no doubt the man went down fighting, his only concern for what was going to happen to Poppy.</p><p>Tora glanced up at his wife then; she was stroking her belly as she stared thoughtfully out the window. He cleared his throat and she looked over at him.</p><p>“Our son needs a name,” he said and she smiled softly at him.</p><p>“Yes, he does,” she agreed. “Do you have a new one in mind?”</p><p>“Got a couple,” he told her. “Whaddya think about Joseph Tyson? Or… dunno, maybe Tyson Joseph sounds a lil’ better? Yeah, kinda like Tyson Joseph. Whaddya think, Bobby?”</p><p>Poppy’s hand stilled on her stomach; her large brown eyes held Tora’s gaze hostage while she said nothing.</p><p>“Ah, didn’t know if you’d like it,” he told her, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Yer dad meant a lot to ya too and of course I want him represented, I just…”</p><p>“Tora? I love it.”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>Poppy crossed the room to him and tilted her head up at him expectantly. He pressed a soft kiss to her mouth, a smile playing on his own.</p><p>“Yes, I do. It’s perfect. And don’t worry, we’ll name our next kid after my dad,” she grinned.</p><p>
  <em>Next kid. </em>
</p><p>“Let’s worry ‘bout gettin’ this one outta ya first,” Tora chuckled. “Then I’ll help ya make another.”</p><p>---</p><p>Goodnight to sleep,</p><p>To our life before.</p><p>Goodnight pregnancy</p><p>And good morning to <em>more.</em></p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>One Week Later</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>It was ten o’clock on Friday night when Tora finally arrived home from work. Initially his shift was due to end at two that afternoon, but one of the other guards had called off to tend to his sick, elderly mother. When his supervisor approached him about overtime, Tora had agreed, feeling bittersweet about the whole thing. With the baby coming, it would be nice to have the extra money, but he was disappointed he’d be missing his final birthing class with Poppy.</p><p>Tora shuffled up to the house, smirking at the sight of his brother’s ostentatious sports car parked in the driveway; in a small, quiet suburb, it stuck out like a bright yellow thumb.</p><p>Tora had immediately texted Poppy at six-thirty that morning, right after he’d agreed to the double shift. He’d apologized relentlessly and then he had the thought to call Quincey and ask if he’d go to the class with her. It would be better if at least <em>one</em> of them went; this way, they wouldn’t have to worry about rescheduling and potentially miss attending altogether before Tyson was born.</p><p>Just as Tora thought he would, Quincey agreed enthusiastically, eager to be involved <em>and </em>to beat “Tora’s score.”</p><p>“Score? The fuck ya mean, my score?” he’d asked Quincey over the phone.</p><p>“Yeah, you know, your grade! I’m going to be at the top of the class and I’m not even having a baby,” Quincey said matter-of-factly.</p><p>Tora snorted. “They don’t fuckin’ grad…” he paused. On second thought, let his brother make a fool of himself. Poppy would be annoyed and have to use some of her newly acquired pregnancy rage to put Quincey in his place, but Tora would make it up to her later.</p><p>“Sure, Quince, see if ya can beat it,” Tora smirked. “Yer talkin’ to the fuckin’ teacher’s pet.”</p><p>“Not for <em>looong</em>,” Quincey chirped at him and hung up the phone.</p><p>Tora couldn’t fucking <em>wait</em> to hear all about it.</p><p>Once inside, Tora toed off his shoes and turned left into the living room, the dim blue glow of the tv the only light source in the room. Poppy was stretched out on her side on the couch and Quincey was kicked back in the overstuffed armchair in the corner, his feet propped up on a pile of pillows on the ottoman. Callum was tucked into his brother’s side, not looking at all happy to be sitting separate from his mom.</p><p>“Hi Bobby,” Tora said as he approached her and stooped to drop a kiss on her forehead. Without thinking, his hand landed on the dome of her stomach and caressed it softly. Poppy placed a hand over his and held on as he continued stroking her. Tora glanced over at his brother, who was watching them with a smile on his face.</p><p>“Hey Quince.”</p><p>“Hi, honey. How was work?”</p><p>Tora shrugged. “Was work,” he said and lifted Poppy’s feet from the couch so he could sit down. Fuck, it was the first time he’d sat down all <em>day</em> and it felt great to melt into the cushions. Tora drew Poppy’s swollen feet into his lap and cradled one in his hands; she sighed quietly as he began to rub into her arch with his thumbs.</p><p>He smiled, enjoying the fact that he could make her feel good. As tired and sore as he was, he knew Poppy was feeling it tenfold.   </p><p>“How was class?” Tora asked and turned to look at Poppy as she snorted out a laugh.</p><p>“Itwasgreat,” Quincey said, his words pouring out in a rush as Poppy continued to giggle.</p><p>Tora smirked as he glanced sideways at Poppy. “What the fuck happened?”</p><p>“Quincey <em>fainted</em>!” Poppy cried and erupted into giggles as Quincey scowled at her.</p><p>“<em>What</em>?” Tora asked, laughter threatening to bubble out of his own mouth.</p><p>This was even fucking better than he thought.</p><p>Quincey perked up on the chair and waved his hands dramatically in front of him. “Okay, <em>okay. </em>Yes, I fainted. But in my defense… That instructor, <em>Sara</em>? She’s a fucking monster, with her big… black HAIR and her macrame BRA. Do you even know what she showed us?”</p><p>“It was a birthing video, Quincey,” Poppy said as she wiped the tears from her eyes. “They show them to sixth grade health classes.”</p><p>“That should be illegal!” the blonde man cried and Callum squirmed beside him, desperate to jump down. Quincey held the dog in place with one hand, the other still spiraling madly in front of him. “It was incredibly violent. There was so much… <em>blood.</em>”</p><p>Poppy stared at him in admonishment. “It’s <em>good </em>blood. It’s life giving! And why are you even complaining? All the women in that class <em>fawned </em>all over you. Hana even bought you a Gatorade and cookies from the vending machine!”</p><p>Quincey looked thoughtful for a moment. “Okay, fair point.”</p><p>“And <em>then</em>,” Poppy said, staring pointedly at Tora, “they had us do the pain management exercise again, remember? Where the mother sits on the yoga ball and the partner massages her back with tennis balls?”</p><p>Tora nodded. Christ, compared to this class, the one he’d attended with Poppy sounded mild. They’d done little else besides performing the pain management exercises, taking a tour of the hospital and practicing changing the baby’s diapers.</p><p>“I’m sitting on the yoga ball, rocking back and forth like I'm supposed to. Quincey is massaging me and once he reaches my lower back, I feel him leaning into me. I turn around and he’s passing out <em>again</em>,” Poppy cackled.</p><p>Quincey’s gaze dropped to the floor as Tora laughed. “Sara said I probably leaned too far forward,” he mumbled. “She made me put my head between my legs and then I had to sit the rest of the class out.”</p><p>“Yup, Sara ended up being my partner for the rest of it,” Poppy finished.</p><p>Tora barked out another laugh. “So ya can write all about how babies are <em>made,</em>” he said, “but when it comes to bringin’ ‘em into the world…”</p><p>“It’s horrific!” Quincey shot back. “If Jonathan and I ever decide to have kids, we’re adopting, hands down.”</p><p>“Pfft, probably for the best,” Tora told him.</p><p>Poppy pulled her feet from his lap just then and struggled to push herself off the couch. “Oof, I have to pee, <em>again. </em>And I think my nipples are leaking, <em>again. </em>Ugh, I feel like a human water balloon.”</p><p>Tora watched as Quincey’s eyes widened while the rest of his facial features drooped. “Careful whatcha say, sweetheart,” he called out to Poppy as she waddled away from him. “Don’t want the princess fainting again.”</p><p>“Okay, I’d like to see <em>you-</em>“</p><p>Before Quincey could finish his thought, there was a loud thud near the bathroom.</p><p>Tora was off the couch like a shot and rounded the corner to see Poppy on her hands and knees outside the door of the half bath. “Fuck, not again. Christ, ya okay?” he asked as he helped her to stand.</p><p>“Yeah, I’m fine,” she waved him off casually. “My heart’s racing a little bit, but I’m good.”</p><p>“Honey, everything okay?” Tora heard Quincey yell from the living room.</p><p>“Yeah, she’s good,” Tora called back and worked to steady his breath. At their last appointment, the doctor had said falling was common during pregnancy, especially near the end. It was some hormone’s fault, relaxatonin or some shit, prepping her body for delivery. Poppy had fallen a couple of times now, and luckily always managed to catch herself on her hands and knees, but fuck. He’d thought it was hard to leave her side <em>before. </em></p><p>“Sure ya okay?” he murmured, cupping his hand beneath her belly.</p><p>“Yeah, we’re okay,” she reassured him. “My knees will be a little bruised tomorrow, but better them than Tyson.”</p><p>“Kay,” he said. “If anythin’ starts feelin’ off to ya…”</p><p>“We’ll go straight to the hospital, promise. Now, I’m going to go pee before I burst,” she laughed and tucked herself into the half bathroom.</p><p>Once she closed the door, Tora made his way back into the living room and plopped down on the couch. He looked over at Quincey, who was studying him quietly.</p><p>“She’s okay, Quince,” Tora said in just as much reassurance to himself as his brother. “Ain’t the first time she’s fallen. Doc said to expect it toward the end.”</p><p>“Just as long as they’re all right,” Quincey said and stroked the top of Callum’s head.</p><p>“Thanks fer goin’ with her today,” Tora told him. “Really appreciate it.”</p><p>“No problem, honey. I’m always happy to help, you know that.”</p><p>“Same here. It’s a shame you didn’t beat my score, though,” Tora smirked.</p><p>Quincey frowned at him. “Oh, I’m pretty sure I did.”</p><p>“Really, princess? From what I heard… Damn, bet she failed ya.”</p><p>Quincey lurched forward in the chair toward him. “As a matter of fact, Sara told me I passed,” he told Tora loudly.</p><p>“Out!” shouted Poppy’s voice from the bathroom. “Quincey, she told you that you passed <em>out!</em>”</p><p>Quincey shrugged and chuckled. “Heh. The difference one word makes, huh?”</p><p>---</p><p>Despite both Tora and Poppy insisting he stay the night, Quincey decided to drive home; he and Jonathan were going to look at possible wedding venues in the morning.</p><p>“<em>Please</em> drive safe and text one of us when you get home,” Poppy told him at the front door.</p><p>Quincey kissed her cheek and smiled. “It’s only an hour and a half drive, honey,” he said. “But I’ll let you know when I get there.”</p><p>Then Quincey had clapped his large arms around Tora and hugged him tight. “Think about it, the next time I’ll see you, it’s because my little island nibling is on his way.”</p><p>“Hmmpf, see ya, Quince. Can’t wait,” Tora replied.</p><p>Once Quincey had tucked himself into his car and pulled away from their house, Tora shut the porch light off and ascended the stairs with Poppy, following her closely, anticipating another fall.</p><p>Luckily the trip of the steps was uneventful and after he’d brushed his teeth, he shucked his work uniform off and plopped Cal onto the mattress. Tora stooped down to the floor then and pulled out their hospital go bag from under the bed. Being so close to their due date, he’d made a habit of doing this lately, rifling through and making sure they had packed everything they needed. Some nights he thought of something new and added it before he could forget.</p><p>Poppy's favorite robe, toiletries, extra cell phone charger... and the tiny crocheted hamster hat he'd bought to bring Tyson home in. Poppy had sobbed when he'd given it to her and he couldn't wait to see her put it on their son's head for the first time. </p><p>Satisfied that the bag contained all of the necessary items, he zipped it closed and shoved it back under the bed before slipping under the covers. He plugged his phone in and quickly checked the traffic on the route they'd be taking to the hospital. For now, it looked clear and safe for travel.</p><p>Tora set his cell phone down on the nightstand; he then reached for their copy of <em>Goodnight, Moon </em>and flipped it open to the first page.</p><p>He read out loud until Poppy entered the room wearing one of his old shirts. She yawned and rubbed sleepily at her lower back before she joined him in the bed.</p><p>“I think Quincey did a number on me with those tennis balls. My back is pretty sore,” she said as she adjusted the pillows and lowered herself onto her left side. “Hopefully I’ll actually get some sleep tonight.”</p><p>Tora closed the book and looked over at her. “Sure it ain’t somethin’ else?” he asked, eyeing her carefully.</p><p>Poppy shrugged. “I mean, I guess it could be false contractions again,” she said. “But I highly doubt the hospital would be happy about us showing up a <em>third </em>time for Braxton Hicks.”</p><p>“Better safe than sorry, Bobby.”</p><p>“Well, if anything changes, we’ll go straight there. I promise,” she murmured, her eyes heavy as she looked at him. “Would you read to me?”</p><p>“Sure,” he said and scooted closer until his arm was pressing against hers. Tora once again flipped the book open to the first page.</p><p><em>"In the great green room,” </em>he read,<em> “there was a telephone and a red balloon. And a picture of the cow jumping over the moon…”</em></p><p>When Tora awoke several hours later, the book propped open on his legs and his bedside lamp still on, he looked over to see Poppy sitting up and patting the bedding beneath her with frenzied hands.</p><p>“Bobby?” Tora said softly, pushing himself up onto his elbows.</p><p>Poppy's panicked gaze met his, her eyes large and shiny.</p><p><em>"Tora,"</em> she gasped. “I think my water broke.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fun fact: Tora is playing a 1968 Yamaha GC-3 acoustic guitar, one that was created in a collaboration with a Spanish guitar builder named Eduardo Ferrer. It's the same guitar that my best friend Gaby plays and if you're interested, you can see Gaby's pictures of it on my Instagram page :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. We're Hoping It's a Dinosaur - Birth: Part 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora prepare to become parents. </p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello, my name is PB&amp;C and I'm a filthy liar LOL</p><p>I SWORE I'd be able to condense the birth into one chapter, but it was getting incredibly long and we were only halfway there, so I found a good stopping point and decided to cut it in half. </p><p>Sorry for the delay in getting this next chapter out! I think I was so hyper-focused/anxious to make sure all of the hospital shit was accurate that I forgot the characters will need to talk, do things, etc. because the miracle of birth can be a snooze fest and they'd have plenty of time on their hands LOL. Now that I know how the next chapter will be structured, it shouldn't take me as long to write and upload. </p><p>THAT being said, if I get any of the hospital/birth processes wrong, please forgive me lol. I've relied heavily on YouTube, Google and the moms in my life to educate me on the things I haven't yet experienced for myself. One day! </p><p>The biggest, hugest shout out EVER to my pregnancy/mama gurus, CopyPastel and OneAndOnlyTako. I am forever indebted to them for their screaming walls of caps lock baby advice. They've cheered me on and inspired me so much throughout this pregnancy arc. I LOVE these women and this chapter is dedicated to them; sending tons of hugs and smiles your way &lt;3 </p><p>I also have several of you to thank for requesting Poppy and Tora's pregnancy:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Audrey, RaquelSousa, Spotlightgirlontherun, Rollie89, Foxesinboxes, and Mackgurl2020.</p><p>I hope you enjoy part one (of two, I promise lol) of baby boy's birth! </p><p>Love you all and see you soon, </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>Come hang out with me on Instagram: @peanut.butterandchelly<br/>I LOVE chatting with you all!</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“<em>Tora</em>,” she gasped. “I think my water broke.”</p><p>Tora’s breath caught in his throat.</p><p>
  <em>Holy. Shit. </em>
</p><p>It was go time.</p><p>In a flash of blankets, tattoos and messy hair, Tora was off the mattress, his bare feet planted firmly on the carpet. Callum peered up at him from where he’d jumped down onto the floor, his liquid brown eyes curious.</p><p>“S’time, buddy,” Tora told him and crouched down beside the bed, one hand quickly ruffling the top of the dog’s head and the other digging beneath the bed frame for where he’d stuffed the hospital go bag just a few hours ago.</p><p>Tora had felt this level of panic several times before in his life; those heart-stopping moments where a knock on his front door in the middle of the night could’ve meant his death or someone else’s.</p><p>As his fingers found the handle of the bag, he gripped it and clenched his jaw tightly, reminding himself that <em>this </em>time it was good, happy and <em>this </em>bag wasn’t full of instruments that could kill someone. <em>This </em>bag was packed to the zipper with life, items of comfort, everything they’d need to help bring their son into the world.</p><p>
  <em>Son. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>They were going to have a son. </em>
</p><p>No longer a dream in his head. Something real, <em>someone.</em> A tiny, warm person that he could touch, hold and love, just like his wife.</p><p>
  <em>His wife. </em>
</p><p>Tora quickly hefted the bag onto the comforter and then rounded the corner of the mattress, where Poppy was working to wiggle herself to the floor. Unsure of where her discomfort might be, Tora carefully threaded his arm under hers, supporting her shoulder blades and gripped her hand in his as she lowered herself onto the carpet.</p><p>“Feelin’ okay?” he asked her, his hand slipping around the swollen dome of her stomach.</p><p>“Yeah…my back aches and it sort of feels like I have really intense period cramps?” she said, her big brown eyes bright and wide awake as they found his. “My heart is <em>racing</em>. I’m excited but… I’m a little scared,” she admitted.</p><p>Tora lifted her fingers in his and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. “You’ll do great,” he assured her. “Gonna be beside ya the whole time. Promise.”</p><p>Satisfied that she was steady on her feet, Tora released her and moved across the room to their dresser, where he pulled a gray t-shirt over his head and tucked himself into a pair of dark jeans. He quickly tugged on a pair of socks and then looked at her as he shouldered the duffel bag.</p><p>“Ready?” he asked.</p><p>“Um, my body is,” Poppy half-laughed, “but I’d like to clean myself up a bit first.” She gestured downwards to her bare legs. “I feel like a soggy paper bag right now.”</p><p>Tora shook his head at himself. Waking up to Poppy’s water breaking had spiked his body with a decent amount of adrenaline; heart thumping hard, he’d leapt from the covers to the floor in seconds, ready to put her in the car and drive her to the hospital.</p><p>It seemed the adrenaline had yet to pierce his brain and it was still playing catch up. Of <em>course </em>she’d want to dry off, change clothes and be as comfortable as she could before labor became as uncomfortable as <em>it </em>could.</p><p>Tora laughed through his nose. “Pfft. Sorry, sweetheart, wasn’t thinkin’. Ya need help getting changed?” he asked as he watched her rummage through the chest of drawers, one hand digging through her piles of clothing while the other hand rubbed deep circles into her lower back.</p><p>“I think I’ll be okay,” she told him and finding what she wanted, she slid the drawer shut. She padded across their bedroom to the connected bathroom and flicked on the light. “Be right out.” She closed the door behind her on a quiet click and Tora rubbed one hand down his face, releasing a deep breath.</p><p>
  <em>Son. </em>
</p><p>They were going to meet their son.</p><p>They were going to be his mom and dad.</p><p>
  <em>Parents. </em>
</p><p>Tora blinked hard against the onslaught of words and emotions threatening to overwhelm him. He could break down later, could cry when his son was finally safe and healthy in their arms. Now wasn’t the time to get emotional. He had things to do.</p><p>Tora’s eyes did a quick scan of the room, searching for any last minute items they might need for the hospital. He tossed their cell phones into the bag, then plucked Poppy’s phone charger from the wall beside their bed; he’d packed one already, but it wouldn’t hurt to have two. He also scooped up the dog-eared romance novel from her bedside table. He’d learned from the birthing classes that labor could be a long, drawn out experience; Poppy might appreciate something to do while they waited on Tyson.</p><p>Once he was satisfied they weren’t going to leave anything important behind, Tora stripped the sheets from the bed and tossed them in a pile on the floor. He’d throw them in the washer once they were settled back at home.</p><p>Tora took a seat on the edge of the mattress, now covered with nothing but its cotton protector. Aside from the twenty minute drive to the hospital, he was unsure of the next time he’d be able to sit down and his tired body was going to take full advantage.</p><p>Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Callum round the corner of the bed, making a beeline for the mound of blankets on the floor. He pawed gently at the edge of them, then plopped himself down in the middle, facing Tora. Without moving his head, the dog’s eyes and ears both lifted up toward Tora.</p><p>Tora offered Callum a small smile. In that moment, the dog seemed just as unsettled as he felt.</p><p>He removed the strap of the bag from his shoulder and set it on the mattress before sliding down and sitting on the floor. He patted his thigh with one hand, gesturing at the Cavapoo.</p><p>“C’mere, punk,” he said. The dog pushed himself to his feet before padding his way over to Tora and plopping down on his lap.</p><p>“Probably wonderin’ what’s going on, huh?” he said, pulling his hand softly through the fluffy fur on Callum’s head. “Me ‘n Mom gotta leave for a bit and when we come back, s’gonna be with yer lil’ brother.”</p><p>Callum glanced up at Tora and let out a low, whining yawn, clearly unimpressed.</p><p>He chuckled. “Yer gonna be nice to him, right? Lil’ brothers are okay,” he told the dog. “Don’t get me wrong, they can be hard to get along with. Goliath died before ya could meet him. He was a punk like you, but he’s the reason I’m even here sittin’ with ya.”</p><p>Tora paused, taking a moment to picture Goliath’s face before continuing. “Quincey, too. S’done a lot for us and I know ya think the sun rises outta his ass, but he can be annoyin’ as fuck.”</p><p>Tora stroked the dog’s back, letting his hand rest across Cal’s ribs. “He’s worth it, though. Don’t go tellin’ him I said that. Actually, should probably text the princess and let him know what’s goin’ on.”</p><p>With his other hand, he dipped into the bag and withdrew his phone, tapping open his most recent message thread with Quincey.</p><p>
  <em>near, far</em>
</p><p>A couple of minutes ticked by before Tora’s phone buzzed with a response.</p><p>
  <em>Wherever you are</em>
</p><p>His phone buzzed again.</p><p>
  <em>IS MY LITTLE ISLAND NIBLING ON HIS WAY</em>
</p><p><em>yeah, </em>he typed. <em>Ikigai university hospital text gyu</em></p><p>
  <em>OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!</em>
</p><p>Tora smirked at his brother’s response; he’d leave it at that.</p><p>He opened up another conversation and sent his coworker Avery a text, letting him know the baby was on his way. Over the past couple of years, Avery had really become more than just a coworker. He was Tora’s friend, a <em>good </em>friend. Aside from Poppy, he was the first he’d made outside of the clan.</p><p>Avery had offered to house and dog sit while they were at the hospital; Tora had given him the spare key to their home weeks ago, feeling better about that than the alternative: hiding it under the outdoor mat or in a plant pot. In his whole life, he never thought he’d feel comfortable leaving his house key behind with <em>anyone. </em></p><p>It was nice to know there were people outside of their family who could be trusted with his and Poppy’s most precious things.</p><p>The sound of the bathroom door swinging open caught Tora by the ear and he turned his head to the dimly lit doorway where Poppy stood in a loose pair of maternity shorts and her favorite night shirt, pastel colored and decorated with fuzzy soot sprites parading across her round belly.</p><p>“Ready?” she asked.</p><p>Tora blinked at her.</p><p>
  <em>Ready or not, here he comes. </em>
</p><p>He gently shifted Callum from his lap onto the carpet and pushed himself off the floor. Tora tucked his cell phone back into the bag, zipped it and slung it over his shoulder before crossing the room to Poppy. He held out a hand to her.</p><p>“Ready.”</p><p>---</p><p>Thanks to the early morning hour, the drive to the hospital was quick with little traffic to navigate around. As soon as Tora had closed Poppy into the car and lowered himself into the driver’s seat, he slipped Poppy’s cell phone out of the bag. He handed it to her.</p><p>“Better call Granny,” he said. The older woman had cornered him at the baby shower weeks ago, threatening him with bodily harm if he didn’t call as soon as Poppy went into labor, no matter the time, day or night.</p><p>Poppy dialed Eleanor and she picked up within a handful of seconds. As soon as the words “<em>Tyson’s on his way</em>” left his wife’s mouth, Poppy quickly jerked the phone from her ear as her grandmother proceeded to break the sound barrier. Tora smirked; he didn’t know it was possible for someone to cry and laugh so <em>loudly </em>at the same time.</p><p>After Poppy hung up with the older woman, she plunked the phone down into the cupholder and stared silently ahead. Keeping one eye on the road, Tora stretched his hand out across the center console palm up, wiggling his fingers at her. He wanted to touch her, wanted to keep reminding her that though he couldn’t do the physical part of labor for her, he wasn’t going anywhere.</p><p>Out of the corner of his eye he saw her smile and then felt the warmth of her little fingers threading themselves through his. He heard her sigh beside him.</p><p>“Doin’ okay, sweetheart?” he asked. “Havin’ much pain?”</p><p>“A little more than I woke up with, but it’s bearable,” she told him.</p><p>“Comfortable? Are ya too hot? Too cold?” Tora withdrew his hand from hers and reached for the dashboard, where he fiddled around with the knob for the A/C.</p><p>Poppy giggled and immediately pulled his hand back to re-tangle with hers on the console. “Tora, it’s okay. I’m fi-“</p><p>Her words were cut off with a sharp hiss and Tora felt Poppy’s grip tighten around his hand. His head snapped to the side and he frowned as he took in the pinched features of her face: her eyes squinted shut, the tightening of her jaw, her bottom lip pulled between her teeth. She inhaled deeply and hummed low in her throat before exhaling through her mouth.</p><p>“Bobby, ya okay?” he asked, squeezing her hand back and easing his foot on the gas pedal. Fuck, was the car ride causing her discomfort? Did she need him to pull over?</p><p>Finally her eyes fluttered open and she turned her head toward him. Her hand slackened a bit in his, but still held on firmly.</p><p>“Whew, that was intense,” she laughed and there was an air of nervousness coiled around the sound. “Worst one yet.”</p><p>Tora’s gaze flickered to the dashboard clock: 2:53. They needed to be keeping an eye on the amount of time between her contractions. He hated the thought that they were only going to get worse from here.</p><p>He pulled Poppy’s hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. “S’gonna be all right, sweetheart. Almost there.”</p><p>---</p><p>Despite being in a sleep deprived fog, Tora somehow managed to mentally conjure up the directions they’d been given during the birthing class. <em>Enter through Parking Lot 4 for Labor and Delivery on the east side of the hospital.</em></p><p>Tora pulled the car up to the curb outside of the double doors and helped ease Poppy out of the passenger seat. He pinched her cell phone from the cupholder and handed it to her.</p><p>“Okay, sweetheart, why don’t ya head inside and have a seat in the waitin’ room while I park the car?” he said. Poppy nodded and shuffled up the sidewalk toward the entrance.</p><p>Tora made a wide turn around a concrete divider and cruised slowly back toward the building. Save for a minivan and a small green SUV, the parking lot was empty and he was able to swing into a spot in the front row. He hefted the bag from the backseat and as he swung his long legs to the concrete, his eye caught on something white hovering above the hood of his car.</p><p>As he peered more closely at it, he realized it was a metal sign, painted with the image of a stork carrying a yellow fabric bundle in its long beak. The words <strong>EXPECTING PARENTS </strong>were printed in bold lettering right below the bird’s feet.</p><p>
  <em>He was about to be a parent. What was he supposed to expect? How the fuck was he going to DO this?</em>
</p><p>Tora shook his head and lifted himself from the car, quickly slamming the door shut and locking it behind him.</p><p>
  <em>Still got a long way to go before you’re allowed to freak out. Just hold it together. Not yet. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>She comes first.</em>
</p><p>As Tora approached the entrance, he spotted his wife standing at the edge of the sidewalk with her cell phone pressed to her ear.</p><p>He sidled up next to her, listening quietly.</p><p>“Okay, yes, we know where it is. Thank you so much,” Poppy said and then hung up the phone. She looked up at him. “That was a receptionist for the hospital, she said we have to go through the emergency room entrance for overnight hours.”</p><p>Tora heaved out an annoyed sigh at himself. Fuck, he <em>knew </em>that. Sara had told them that during their tour of the hospital. <em>Labor and Delivery closes at midnight. Use the emergency room entrance if labor begins overnight.</em></p><p>Somehow, in his tired and anxiety-riddled state, it had completely slipped through a crack in his brain.</p><p>
  <em>Way to hold it together, tiger. </em>
</p><p>“Fuck, I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he told her. “Totally forgot.”</p><p>“It’s okay, I didn’t remember either,” she assured him, placing one tiny hand on his arm. “It’s not like we have other things on our mind.” She chuckled and flattened her other hand out over her belly.</p><p>Hmmpf.</p><p>“Yeah,” he said. Normally her words would be a soothing balm for his soul, drawing the heat of his frustration away until he felt cool and level-headed again.</p><p>But not today. She was in labor and didn’t need any extra thoughts taking up space in her brain. <em>He</em> needed to be more on the ball, attentive and supportive.</p><p>“Hang tight here, Bobby,” he told her and jostled the bag onto his back. “I’ll bring the car around.”</p><p>“Tora, I can walk,” she said and stood firmly alongside him.</p><p>“S’okay, just wait here.”</p><p>As he stepped off the curb, he heard the soft patter of feet on the pavement. He turned and there was Poppy, waddling up to him.</p><p>Stubborn ass little woman.</p><p>He narrowed his eyes and without looking, thrust his hand out behind him, fingers outstretched. Poppy grabbed it and allowed him to lead her to the car.</p><p>Once they stepped through the sliding glass doors of the <em>right </em>fucking entrance, Tora steered Poppy toward the waiting room and tried to plant her into a seat. “Tora, I’m <em>fine</em>,” she told him and swatted his hand away. “I’m perfectly capable of walking and I’m coming to the front desk with you.”</p><p>Christ, if he didn’t stop rolling his eyes, they might get stuck staring at the ceiling.</p><p>His feisty wife maneuvered her pregnant body around him and made a beeline for a young, blonde woman perched behind a white countertop. Propelled forward by an aggravated huff, Tora followed Poppy to the reception area.</p><p>As they received directions to Labor and Delivery from the receptionist, Tora spotted a small lane of wheelchairs perched at the side of the desk. It might not be a bad idea to get Poppy loaded up into one, just in case she experienced another contraction on the way to their next destination.</p><p>“Can we get one of them?” he asked as the receptionist finished. He jerked his thumb at the rack of wheelchairs.</p><p>The blonde woman blinked up at him. “Um, sure. Ma’am, do you feel you’re capable of walking or would you prefer to-“</p><p>It was Poppy’s turn to roll her eyes. “No, thank you,” she said and puffed out her cheeks at Tora. “I can walk. It feels better on my back. My husband is just being overprotective.”</p><p>The receptionist smiled knowingly. “I understand. He’s not the first dad-to-be to walk in here worried about his partner.”</p><p>With that, he smirked at Poppy. At least <em>one</em> woman saw his side of things. Poppy stuck out her tongue at him and the receptionist laughed.</p><p>“Thanks for yer help,” he told the young woman. “C’mon punk, let’s get ya ass upstairs,” he said and grabbed Poppy’s hand as he headed for the elevators.</p><p>---</p><p>“Tora?”</p><p>At the sound of his name leaving his wife’s mouth, he peered up from where he’d been typing on his phone. He was in the middle of sending text messages to Erdene, Mirabelle, Danae and anyone else Poppy dictated to him.</p><p>“Please let them know they’re more than welcome to come visit <em>after </em>Tyson is born,” she’d said, sweaty and tired after an intense contraction had racked through her body. “I don’t want to entertain a bunch of people with my hoo-ha hanging out.”</p><p>He’d chuckled, released her hand from when she’d been squeezing it during the contraction and slowly felt himself slip into bodyguard mode as he sat back down in his chair. If there was one thing he was good at, it was keeping people away from places they shouldn’t be.</p><p>Tora had been in the middle of a text message to Poppy’s favorite cousin Harper when she said his name. Over the course of the past couple of hours, he’d quickly picked up on the different tones of her voice: a lighter, bubbly sound meant she needed more ice chips and a breathy, warbled noise was her seeking comfort as another contraction rumbled through her pelvis.</p><p>This one, though, was new. Disinterested, kind of huffy.</p><p>“Yeah, sweetheart?” he asked as he tucked his phone away and angled his body toward where she lay in the hospital bed.</p><p>“I’m bored.”</p><p>Tora barked out a laugh. “Bored? Ya gettin’ ready to evict our son from yer lil’ body and yer bored?”</p><p>“Well, he’s taking his sweet time getting here! He’s the one driving this car and he’s cruising along at twenty below the speed limit,” she giggled. “I’m in the backseat and I’m <em>bored.</em>”</p><p>Tora laughed again. “Kay, fine. Whatcha wanna do, Bobby?”</p><p>“Maybe go for another short walk?” she asked hesitantly.</p><p>He frowned at her, which sent her into a fit of giggles. “I know, I know. You barely let me go on the last one. Didn’t you say you packed one of my books? I guess I could read, but I’m really tired. Maybe you can read to me?” she asked.</p><p>Tora snorted. “Want me to read one of ya pervy books out loud to ya, sweetheart?”</p><p>“They’re not all pervy!” she cried. “Which one did you bring?”</p><p>“The one layin’ on yer nightstand.”</p><p>Poppy smirked. “Yeah… that’s one of the pervy ones.”</p><p>“Still want me to read it out loud to ya?”</p><p>“Yes, please.”</p><p>Tora leaned over the arm of his chair and pulled the book from their bag on the floor. It was called <em>The Pisces </em>and had a picture of a woman holding a fish the way you… didn’t typically hold a fish. Weird.</p><p>He thumbed it open and found the page where she’d pressed a cutesy little bookmark to hold her place.</p><p>He cleared his throat dramatically. “Might need some of those ice chips if I’m gonna do this properly,” he told her. Just as dramatically, she yanked the plastic cup of ice chips from her bedside table and clutched them closely to her chest.</p><p>“Get your own! I’m not sharing,” she laughed.</p><p>“Rude lil’ punk,” he teased and settled back into his chair as he began to read. “’<em>I sucked and jerked gently, but he would not get fully hard. I began to lick his balls. I put them in my mouth. My chin rested on the place where his tail’… </em>His fuckin’ tail? The hell kinda shit am I readin’? ‘<em>where his tail met his skin. The scales were slimy and hard at the same’… </em>Christ, Bobby, is this chick bonin’ a mermaid?” Tora asked.</p><p>“Mer-<em>man</em>,” she said matter-of factly. “Please continue.”</p><p>Tora shook his head. “Whatever ya say, kid. ‘<em>The scales were slimy and hard at the same time. But his balls were delicious, like raw oysters’…</em>”</p><p>His next words were cut off as their nurse Kaiya, a short, young, wiry woman with a mess of black hair piled on top of her head, entered the room. “How are we doing, guys?” she asked as she made her way over to Poppy’s bedside.</p><p>Tora immediately snapped the book shut and slipped it under his legs.</p><p>Kaiya gazed over at him knowingly. “No need to be shy about what you were reading,” she said as she helped Poppy adjust her pillows. “It’s not like we don’t know how you two ended up in here.”</p><p>Heat flooded his cheeks and his heartbeat thundered in his eardrums as Poppy snorted with laughter.</p><p>“What’s the name of it?” Kaiya asked. Tora stared at her; he could only imagine how wide his fucking eyes were at being caught reading fish smut out loud to his pregnant wife. “It sounded interesting,” the little nurse continued and shrugged.</p><p>Tora cleared his throat again. “<em>The Pisces</em>,” he mumbled. Christ, he hated how his voice sounded right now.</p><p>“Cool, I’ll have to look it up.”</p><p>The temperature of Tora’s cheeks immediately dropped as he heard Kaiya ask Poppy’s permission to perform a vaginal exam on her. He knew it was procedure, a way of measuring how labor was coming along, but he <em>hated </em>the pinched, pained expressions Poppy had made at their previous appointments when they probed at her.</p><p>Fuck, if he could, he’d bottle every ounce of her discomfort, <em>all </em>of her pain and drink it himself so she wouldn’t feel a goddamn thing.</p><p>Poppy gave Kaiya the go ahead and cringed as the nurse lifted the blanket and extended her arm forward. “Poppy, sugar, are you doing okay? If you want to ball your fists and slide them under your lower back, it’ll help me reach better and there should be less discomfort for you.”</p><p>His wife did as Kaiya said and her expression lightened a bit. Finally, the nurse withdrew her hand and pulled the blanket back down over Poppy. “You’re about 6 centimeters dilated,” Kaiya told her. “How’s your pain? Have you thought about an epidural?”</p><p>“Yeah, I think I want one,” Poppy said as she shifted to rest on her side. “I thought I could handle it, but the contractions are getting pretty rough.”</p><p>“Sure thing, sugar. I’ll go find out when our anesthesiologist is available and send him your way.”</p><p>“Thank you!” Poppy called out to the nurse as she exited the room. Then she turned toward Tora and gestured at the book still tucked under his lap.</p><p>“Keep reading, tiger. You were just getting to the good part. Or maybe we should wait for Kaiya to come back so she can listen? She seemed interested,” Poppy managed to say before she burst out into peals of laughter.</p><p>“Fuck, Bobby, no,” he sighed, a flood of heat rushing back to his cheeks as he thought about Kaiya telling the entire nurse station about the six foot three simp in room 816 reading about salty mermaid balls to his wife. “Let’s do somethin’ else.”</p><p>---</p><p>After two minutes of Poppy teasing him, deepening her voice and mumbling “<em>It’s called The Pisces, Kaiya,</em>” then squealing with laughter, he pulled his chair closer to her bedside and pinched one of her cheeks.</p><p>“Sorry I don’t got a tail and scales, Bobby,” he grinned and slid his hand down to grasp one of hers. “How are ya doin’? Still good? Feel okay?” He brushed his lips over her knuckles and stared at her face.</p><p>“Yeah, I’m okay,” she said. “I’m really tired, though. My back hurts, too.”</p><p>“Can go ask Kaiya what the status of your epidural is if ya want?”</p><p>“That’s okay, I just want you to stay here.”</p><p>“Kay. Can ya sit up? I’ll rub yer back for ya.”</p><p>She beamed at him. “Okay.”</p><p>He helped prop her into a sitting position and gently massaged the areas of her lower back that she gestured to. After a moment, she spoke up.</p><p>“I’m still bored.”</p><p>Tora snorted. “Told ya, Bobby, I ain’t readin’ that shit to ya anymore.”</p><p>“No,” she giggled. “Maybe we can do something else? How about the alphabet game?”</p><p>“Kay, sweetheart,” he said as he trailed his hands across her back. “You start.”</p><p>He felt Poppy’s body perk up a bit. “Okay, um…” She was silent for a handful of seconds as she scanned the room, then pointed to a framed abstract art print on the wall. “Art.”</p><p>He tapped a finger on her shoulder. “Bobby.”</p><p>Her body heaved with a sigh. “That doesn’t count.”</p><p>“Fine.” He reached around her with one hand and placed his palm over their son. “Baby.”</p><p>“Tora, he’s not technically in the room yet,” she laughed.</p><p>“Gonna tell him ya said that.”</p><p>“Okay, fine, it counts! Baby, belly, whatever,” she huffed. Another moment of silence and then she said, “Chart.”</p><p>A flicker of movement, something floating outside of the door window caught Tora’s eye and he pushed himself out of his chair.</p><p>“Wha-“ Poppy began.</p><p>Tora pointed at the door as he spotted a flash of styled blonde hair through the glass. “Dumbass.”</p><p>Poppy angled herself in the direction of the room entrance and sucked in a breath. “Oh my god, please don’t let him in here. What if I have a contraction?” A look of pure terror swept across her face. <em>“I’m not wearing any underwear!”</em></p><p>“I gotcha, Bobby,” Tora told her and strode across the room. He opened the door and was immediately battered in the face by a sea of metallic colored balloons. “Quince?” he growled as he pushed the annoying balls of helium away from his head.</p><p>Suddenly, Quincey’s beaming face popped up through a small hole that opened in the middle of the shiny balloon cloud. “Hi, honey!”</p><p>“God damnit, the hell is all this shit?” Tora grumbled as he gestured at the balloons.</p><p>“What does it look like? They’re gifts for Poppy and Tyson,” his brother said. “Don’t worry, I got something for you, too.” Tora heard rustling through the hole and then Quincey was thrusting a stuffed tiger wearing a green cloth diaper at him. “Look what they had at the gift shop!”</p><p>“Jesus Christ, did ya clear the place out? Listen, we appreciate ya bein’ here but Poppy ain’t ready for visitors, Quince.”</p><p>“Oh, well, I thought…”</p><p>Another blonde-headed face appeared beside Quincey’s. “I told him that,” Jonathan said. “But you know how he is. He wanted to be here for you as soon as possible.”</p><p>Tora sighed. “Hey, Jon. Look, it means a lot that you’re here. We <em>want </em>ya here. Yer the first person I told, for fuck’s sake.” At this, a goofy grin stretched across Quincey’s face. Tora rolled his eyes but couldn’t help the smirk that crept along his own.</p><p>“But she’s, uh… exposed and havin’ contractions, she’s exhausted. I’m sorry ya came all the way here at this hour… there’s a pretty comfortable waitin’ room if ya wanna stay. If ya don’t, I get it-“</p><p>“<em>Honey</em>,” Quincey cut him off, waving his hand in front of him. “We are not going <em>anywhere </em>until I’ve held Nibling for at least an hour.”</p><p>A balloon of relief popped in Tora’s chest. He hadn’t realized it until the words left Quincey's mouth, but he’d <em>hoped </em>his brother would say that.</p><p>“Thanks, Quince. Sorry, I know ya said you were gonna look at wedding venues later on…”</p><p>It was Jonathan’s turn to cut Tora off. “Don’t worry about that. We can do it next weekend. Our nephew’s almost here and that’s a big deal.”</p><p>“Fuck, okay. Okay,” Tora breathed and ran a hand over his face. He wasn’t sure if it was sleep deprivation, his nerves or seeing his brothers, but he suddenly felt overwhelmed by the urge to cry. He sucked in a deep breath and blinked hard against the tears welling in his eyes.</p><p>
  <em>Not yet. </em>
</p><p>“Hey, Dad?” The soft voice of Kaiya drifted to his ears. She’d somehow made it past the balloons and was standing in front of the door with one hand on the knob.</p><p>
  <em>Dad. </em>
</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>Amazing how quickly he'd taken to the name. </p><p>“The anesthesiologist is on his way down to administer the epidural,” she told him.</p><p>“Okay, yeah. Be there in just a sec, thanks,” Tora told her and turned to the two blonde men in front of him.</p><p>“Gotta go be with her now, help her hold still,” he said.</p><p>“Sure, honey, sure. She needs you. We’ll be in the waiting room if you guys need anything. Tell her we said hello and we love her.”</p><p>“Thanks, Quince. Will do.”</p><p>---</p><p>Poppy was asleep.</p><p>Tora sighed and slunk deeper into his chair, happy that she was finally able to get some rest. The epidural had taken about ten minutes to administer; he’d been curled tightly around her, trying to keep her still and letting her squeeze his hand as the doctor inserted the needle into her spine.</p><p>Another fifteen minutes passed before Poppy finally said she felt some form of relief and then fell asleep.</p><p>He’d stepped out into the hall shortly after she’d closed her eyes and called her granny to update her on how labor was progressing. Eleanor thanked him for calling and told him she didn’t quite trust her old eyes to drive long distances at night anymore, so she was going to be there first thing the next day.</p><p>Before they’d hung up, Eleanor stopped him. “Thank you for being there for my baby girl,” she told him. “I love you and I’ll see you soon.”</p><p>He’d somehow managed to croak out a “You, too” around the lump in his throat before ending the call.</p><p>Now here he was, feeling at peace for the first time in hours, watching his wife sleep comfortably with the weight of her granny’s words settling in his chest. Maybe he should try to catch some sleep too while it was still quiet.</p><p>Tucking his chin into his hand, Tora leaned into his arm and closed his eyes, allowing sleep to wash over him.</p><p>He wasn’t sure how much time had passed when the sound of jostling, metal things being moved around jerked him awake. He saw Kaiya, who was bringing a rolling tray over to the foot of the bed. Poppy was sitting up, her eyes wide and alert as they locked onto him.</p><p>“Hey, sleepyhead,” Kaiya greeted him softly. “Your doctor will be here in a couple of minutes. Little Miss is dilated 10 centimeters, so we’re prepping her to move into delivery. It’s time to have this baby.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Like me, if ANY of you are interested in the book Tora is reading out loud to Poppy it's called "The Pisces" by Melissa Broder. I was looking up excerpts of published smut online, that was the first one I found and now I am plagued by curiosity lol. If you've already read the book, please let me know what you thought!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. We're Hoping It's a Dinosaur - Birth: Part 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora become parents. </p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>***As a heads up, this chapter is a little angsty and references bleeding, surgery, etc.*** </p><p>GAH HE'S FINALLY HERE. </p><p>Thank you so so much to two of my favorite moms/smut sisters, CopyPastel and OneAndOnlyTako for walking me through this terrifying baby arc lol. It would be far less rich and accurate without them. I'm FOREVER grateful for their willingness to candidly share details from their own labor/motherhood experiences. I love you turds!</p><p>With that being said, if anything IS inaccurate, my deepest apologies! It is never my intention to provide false facts or information in my stories. I'm not a mother yet and have no problem admitting that I have no what I'm doing LOL</p><p>I also have several of you to thank for requesting Poppy and Tora's pregnancy:<br/>CaitP, Tayleb87, Audrey, RaquelSousa, Spotlightgirlontherun, Rollie89, Foxesinboxes, and Mackgurl2020.</p><p>I hope you've enjoyed reading about Tora and Poppy welcoming their first child into the world! Only two more updates to go... as insane as that is to type lol. Thank you all for being here! I appreciate every single one of you &lt;3 </p><p>Love you all and see you soon, </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>Come hang out with me on Instagram: @peanut.butterandchelly<br/>I LOVE chatting with you all!</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Forty-five minutes.</p><p>That was all the time it took for Tora’s sleep-founded peace to be shattered, for his and Poppy’s birth plan to be completely thrown out the window, for his mind to travel to the darkest place it had been in a long time.</p><p>His hands shook as he quickly typed out two words, selected the contacts and pressed <em>send</em>.</p><p>
  <strong>To: Quince, Granny</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Emergency c-section</em>
</p><p>An hour ago, they’d moved Poppy into the delivery room and Tora’s heart had vibrated, jumped up into his throat, content to sit there until Tyson was born so the first words he’d say to their son would be words of love.</p><p>He’d held her tiny hand and pressed kisses to her sweaty forehead, whispered soft words of encouragement into her ear as she cried and panted with the effort of attempting to push their son into the world.</p><p>Finally their doctor, Dr. Mori, announced that she could see Tyson’s head crowning. “Oh my!” she’d laughed. “His <em>hair!</em> It’s pitch black and there’s so <em>much </em>of it. Kind of reminds me of Mowgli from The Jungle Book. He definitely takes after his daddy.”</p><p>At that moment, Dr. Mori’s words inflated Tora’s chest with happiness, a sense of pride that soon there was going to be another human in this world like <em>him. </em>He’d teach Tyson to do the right things, to be better than he was. And with Poppy’s influence? The kid had every chance in the world at becoming a good person.</p><p>The moment the doctor’s face fell, as she attempted to help guide Tyson out with her hands, different instruments and failed to move him, something cracked in Tora’s chest.</p><p>“Okay, Poppy? Everything is going to be all right, but Tyson is stuck.”</p><p>His wife’s tear-filled eyes widened, the color of mud after a thunderstorm. “Stuck? Wha-what do you mean, he’s stuck?” she asked.</p><p>“He’s pretty big and his shoulders are too broad to pass through the birth canal,” Dr. Mori said. “I’ve tried adjusting him, but he’s a stubborn little guy. He’s not going anywhere.”</p><p>
  <em>Pretty big. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Too broad. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He definitely takes after his daddy. </em>
</p><p>Fuck, his baby was too big because <em>he </em>was big. Poppy’s body was so small, too tiny. Incompatible. Problematic.</p><p>“He’s in a difficult position right now and we need to get him out immediately,” Dr. Mori continued and gestured at Kaiya, who was hovering by a countertop behind her. “We’re going to prep you for an emergency cesarean, okay? Kaiya is going to get the paperwork drawn up for you to sign and then we’ll move you to the OR.”</p><p>“Wow… um, yeah. Okay. If- if that’s what we have to do, then…” Poppy trailed off; her voice was so <em>watery-sounding</em> and he <em>hated </em>it.</p><p>
  <em>What. The. Fuck. </em>
</p><p>This was happening too fast.</p><p>They were supposed to show up at the hospital, have the baby and leave. No complications, no surgeries, no more blood than there should be.</p><p>
  <em>They had a plan. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>This was supposed to be the easy part. </em>
</p><p>Now, <em>now </em>Dr. Mori was telling them that in a matter of minutes, Poppy was going to be signing a paper giving them permission to take the baby from her. She was going to be cut open, <em>bleeding</em>…</p><p>
  <em>No. </em>
</p><p>“Gotta be somethin’ else ya can do,” he’d said and suddenly, there was a tug deep from the recesses of his mind, a knee-jerk reaction from so long ago to yank down his mafia mask, to intimidate the shit out of her to get what he wanted.</p><p>Instead, his voice rose higher in volume, shaking around the lump in his throat.</p><p>Trying to come to an understanding.</p><p>
  <em>Begging. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Please. Please don’t cut my wife open. </em>
</p><p>“Ain’t surgery a last resort?” he argued. “Can’t ya-“</p><p>“Tora,” Dr. Mori said firmly. His eyes locked onto hers. “I’ve been down here for several minutes trying to get him to move. He’s not responding to anything. If I try to force him out naturally in the position he’s in, there could be complications, brain damage, nerve injury, take your pick.”</p><p>Tora blinked hard at her, his breath faltering at her words.</p><p>“I wanted this to go the way you wanted, too. I promise. I don’t <em>want </em>to do a c-section. I <em>have </em>to if I want to save your baby’s life. Okay?”</p><p>
  <em>Save your baby’s life. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Tyson was in danger. </em>
</p><p>They’d already lost too many people.</p><p>They couldn’t lose their son.</p><p>“Yeah, okay,” he told her and his gaze swept over to Poppy, who was being approached by Kaiya with a clipboard. He watched his wife scribble her signature in the corners of the paperwork and when she finished, she handed the pen back to the nurse and gazed up at him, her eyes drowning in liquid fear.</p><p>
  <em>You’ll do great. Gonna be beside ya the whole time. Promise. </em>
</p><p>“I’m goin’ in there with her,” he told Dr. Mori and squeezed Poppy’s hand tightly in his fist.</p><p>Dr. Mori nodded and stood from where she’d been sitting at Poppy’s feet. “Of course. Kaiya will take you to get scrubbed up and we’ll meet you in the operating room.”</p><p>He turned from their doctor then and lowered his face to Poppy’s; her breath was hot and pushing rapidly against his cheek. Fuck, she had to be so scared. The heat of tears pricked at his eyes and he slammed them shut, forcing them back.</p><p>
  <em>Not yet. </em>
</p><p>He opened his eyes and touched his palm to her cheek.</p><p>“Hey, sweetheart, how ya doin’?”</p><p>“I’m… I’m scared,” she murmured, worrying at her bottom lip. “I just want him to be okay.”</p><p>“He will be,” he told her.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck, please let him be okay. </em>
</p><p>“Ya both will be.”</p><p>
  <em>Please let them be okay.</em>
</p><p>“I’ll be right there with ya to make sure of it. Gonna text Granny and Quince, let ‘em know what’s going on and then I’ll scrub up and be right there. I’ll hold ya hand, let ya bite me. Fuck, I’ll even read ya fish porn out loud if it’ll make ya feel better.”</p><p>At this, Poppy cracked a smile. “Nah, you don’t have to do that.”</p><p>“Ya sure, Bobby? ‘Cuz I’ll do it. Middle of the room, right in front of all those nurses. Raw oyster balls.”</p><p>A giggle slid past her lips. “Oh my god, Tora.”</p><p>He pressed his mouth to her forehead and felt water dripping out of the corner of his eye. He brushed it back. There was a light touch on his arm and he whipped his head around to see Dr. Mori standing beside him.  </p><p>“We’re going to take her down to the OR now, okay?” she said.</p><p>He hadn’t even noticed another nurse had shuffled into the room; she was standing at Poppy’s right side, preparing to unlock the wheels of his wife's bed. </p><p>He nodded at the doctor and pressed another quick kiss to the back of Poppy’s hand before letting go.</p><p>“S’gonna be okay, sweetheart,” he called out as they rolled her toward the door. “I’ll be right there.”</p><p>---</p><p>Tora scrubbed his hands hard in the sink, frantically swiping at the creases of his knuckles and digging under his nails. As he looked up into the mirror, for a fraction of a second, he could’ve sworn he was standing in the cold, concrete bathroom of his old apartment, scouring his hands free of someone else’s blood.</p><p>He blinked hard and shook his head at himself. This time, he was washing his hands for <em>good, </em>ridding his hands of potential germs so he didn’t bring them into the operating room. This was being protective, cautious.</p><p>This was keeping his wife and his son safe.</p><p>Once he dried his hands, he yanked on the pair of latex gloves that Kaiya had given him; he struggled to pull them over his large knuckles and once he finally did, he snapped them over his wrists, where they clung to him tightly.</p><p>Annoying but necessary.</p><p>Kaiya had handed him three shower caps: one for his long hair and two for his shoes. He tucked them all on and then pushed his arms through the sleeves of a crinkly plastic gown. He pulled a mask on over the lower half of his face and once again peered into the mirror.</p><p>The way he was suited up, he looked like he was preparing to walk into some sort of medical combat. He sighed, his breath hot and prickly inside the mask.</p><p>But he wasn’t. He was going to sit in a chair and hold his wife’s hand while she did all the fighting.</p><p>---</p><p>When Tora stepped into the OR, the first thing he saw was a large piece of blue tarp suspended above Poppy; it was draped across her, just below her neck and completely obscured the lower half of her body from his vision.</p><p>The lights in the room were cold, bright white, reflecting off metal instruments and chrome shelving units. There were a few nurses wearing masks; he recognized Kaiya immediately from her lumpy pile of hair haphazardly stuffed into a fabric cap.</p><p>He could hear the metallic sound of things being moved and feet shuffling behind the tarp. Dr. Mori’s voice floated up from behind the blue barrier, as well as the deeper tone of the anesthesiologist and another man, who he assumed was the surgeon.</p><p>Everything about the room was clinical, no warmth or comfort.</p><p>Christ, he <em>hated </em>that they were here, hated that his son was going to be born in a place like this. In the delivery room, there had at least been some art on the walls, even a small snake plant in the corner.</p><p>Tora approached the head of the silver table Poppy was sprawled out on; she lay still, staring up at the ceiling, her eyebrows a straight line across her forehead. He sighed, scooted the chair they’d set up for him forward and sat down in it, his face inches from hers. He took her hand gently so as not to disturb the IV poking out from her skin. His eyes ran from the tube to the machine she was hooked up to where they were monitoring her vitals.</p><p>“Hey, sweetheart, I’m here,” he murmured as she slowly turned her head to face him. Her pupils were blown wide, her eyes almost black.</p><p>“Hi,” she whispered.</p><p>“Ya doin’ okay?” he asked her. “Havin’ any pain?”</p><p>She shook her head. “I can’t feel anything below my waist. They said that’s normal.”</p><p>He sucked in a breath. “Ain’t nothing normal ‘bout that,” he joked lightly. “But I’m glad ya won’t be hurtin’.” He pushed himself into a squat over the chair and leaned forward to press a kiss to her forehead. Her skin was damp with sweat.</p><p>“I’m sorry ya gotta go through this,” he said softly as he settled back into his seat. “Wish it was me on that table instead.”</p><p>“It’ll be okay,” she said and offered him a small smile. “We just have to trust that they know what they’re doing. They’re going to take care of us. That’s what I keep telling myself, anyway.”</p><p>“Hmmpf. Poppylan, I love y-“</p><p>“Mom and Dad?” Dr. Mori called out from behind the blue fabric. “Now that Poppy’s completely numb, we’re going to make the first incision and begin surgery. It should take about ten minutes, okay? You’re gonna do great.”</p><p>Poppy’s grip on his hand tightened as she closed her eyes. Tora heard low murmurs from the other side of the fabric wall, the grasping of medical instruments from a metal tray. Several quiet minutes passed and he finally remembered to take a breath when Kaiya made a pass at the head of the bed.</p><p>“How are you, sugar?” she asked. “You doing okay?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Poppy said as her eyes fluttered open. “I feel loopy, kind of nauseous?”</p><p>“Your blood pressure is a little low from the epidural, but that’s normal,” Kaiya said and rubbed Poppy’s shoulder. “You’re gonna feel better after this. You’ll be a mom and you’ll forget about all this the second you see your baby’s face.”</p><p>“Thanks, Kaiya,” Poppy told her.</p><p>“Anytime. I’ll be right over here if you need me.”</p><p>Once Kaiya strode away, Tora turned his face to Poppy. “Ya sure yer okay, sweetheart? Ya rememberin’ to breathe?”</p><p>“Yeah. It doesn’t hurt, there’s just… pressure. Like someone is tugging on me. It’s weird.”</p><p>“Tuggin’, huh? Like that game of tug of war we played at the Ren Fair?” he asked, desperate to distract her. “Remember? You and all those lil’ kids kicked my ass. Pulled me over the line every time.”</p><p>She smiled at him. “I know you were faking.”</p><p>“Dunno what ya talkin’ about, Bobby. Yer strong as hell.”</p><p>“Mmm. I am pretty tough, huh?”</p><p>“Yup. Think Tyson is gonna take right after ya. He’ll just be another stubborn lil’ shit that I can’t say no to.”</p><p>“Can we take him to the Ren Fair someday?” she asked him.</p><p>“Shit yeah, sweetheart. Ya pick out a lil’ nerd costume for him and we’ll go.”</p><p>Before he could say another word, Dr. Mori’s voice called to them.</p><p>“The baby’s coming out now. He’ll be here any second!”</p><p>The room went quiet and then… the most beautiful, heartbreaking sound Tora had heard in his entire life.</p><p>The first cries of his newborn son.</p><p>
  <em>It’s okay. It’s okay to cry now. </em>
</p><p>Tora’s chest cracked open and he let out a sobbing laugh. “Bobby, Bobby, ya hear him?” he gasped. “He’s loud like his mom.”  </p><p>“Yeah, yeah,” she said, laughing as tracks of tears melted down her cheeks. “I hear him, he’s <em>perfect.</em>”</p><p>Tora stood from his seat and pressed kisses to her forehead, her nose, her mouth. “Ya did it, Bobby.”</p><p>There was a flash of movement at the corner of Tora’s eye and he turned his head to watch the surgeon lift Tyson gently into the air so they could see him.</p><p>Immediately Tora was transported to Quincey’s kitchen, to seeing Poppylan for the first time. His chest ached, it felt broken into pieces and <em>whole</em> all at once. How could he already be <em>so in love </em>with this tiny person he’d just met?</p><p>Love at first sight. He’d heard some shit before, how it was rare to happen even once in your whole life. But twice?</p><p>How was he so fucking lucky?</p><p>He didn’t know what he’d ever done to deserve it.</p><p>Dr. Mori had said he was a big baby, so large and broad that he couldn’t pass through the birth canal naturally, but when Tora finally got a good look at him, all he could think about was how fucking <em>tiny </em>he was.</p><p>Tyson was a soft gray color and he looked like he’d been rolled around in a pile of flour. He was also covered in blood. <em>Good blood, </em>Tora remembered Poppy telling Quincey. <em>It’s life giving.</em></p><p>Just like Dr. Mori said, he had a shock of black hair matted to his head. What had she called him? Bowie?</p><p>He was wrinkled, a little scratched up and swollen, like he’d just walked away from a bar fight. Tyson was wailing; his tiny, angry face was pinched tightly and his eyes were squinted shut as he screamed his frustrations out into the room.</p><p>Christ, he was fucking <em>beautiful. </em></p><p>“Ya see him, Bobby? He’s perfect,” he breathed. He managed to tear his eyes away from his son and looked down at his wife. She looked so <em>happy</em>, her cheeks flushed his favorite color as she laughed and cried at the same time.</p><p>This was his first look at Poppy as a mom and she wore it so <em>well, </em>like it had always been there, just below her surface, waiting for Tyson to draw it out.</p><p>“He’s perfect,” she whispered and clung to Tora’s hand. “He looks just like you.”</p><p>The doctor slowly brought Tyson down and Tora’s eyes flickered to the rest of the room. He could still hear him crying. Where was he? Where did they take him?</p><p>A moment later, Kaiya rounded the edge of the hanging barrier with Tyson in her arms; he was draped in white fabric speckled with blood.</p><p>“Meet your son,” she told them softly and settled the baby on Poppy’s chest.</p><p>As if by reflex, her tiny hands flew to his back, stroking him and attempting to soothe him as he continued to cry. “Hi baby,” she said, her voice warbled, tightened by tears. “I’m your mom. And that big guy right there is your dad.”</p><p>Tora smiled down at his family, trying to mentally commit every second of this moment to his memory. He hovered over Poppy and she withdrew one of her hands from Tyson’s back to make space for Tora’s. Anxiously, he ripped off one of his gloves and pressed his hand to his son’s skin for the very first time.</p><p>Despite being wrinkled, he was soft, warm, alive and <em>real </em>under Tora’s palm. He touched the tips of his fingers to the thick, black hair that feathered out along Tyson’s neck.</p><p>
  <em>So soft.</em>
</p><p>He was here.</p><p>He was really here.</p><p>
  <em>Finally. </em>
</p><p>“I know, I know,” Poppy said to Tyson as he continued to cry against her chest. “You’ve been through a lot. But we’re not so bad, baby. We’re gonna make you happy, I promise. We <em>love </em>you.”</p><p>They existed in this bubble for a few more moments, until Tyson’s crying dissolved into whimpers and soft grunts. For the first time since Tora had stepped into this cold, metal-filled room, he was warm, hopeful, <em>happy </em>as he basked in the feeling of being part of a family of three.</p><p>All too soon, the bubble broke as Kaiya sidled up to them. “Want me to take a picture for you guys?” she asked.</p><p>“Sure, thanks,” he said and dug into his jeans pocket for his cell phone. He handed it over to her and she stood back a couple feet, snapping away at them. When she finished, she returned his phone and then rounded the bed, her arms outstretched toward Tyson.</p><p>“We’re just going to check him out and get him all cleaned up really quick, okay?” she said and Poppy nodded, not taking her eyes off Tyson as she handed him over to the nurse.</p><p>Kaiya received him gently. “The doctor is working on stitching you up, sugar. Shouldn’t be more than half an hour.” she told his wife. Then she turned to Tora. “Once Tyson’s ready, would you like to meet me in your recovery room so you can do skin-to-skin with him?”</p><p>
  <em>A different room?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Leave Poppy?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You’ll do great. Gonna be beside ya the whole time. Promise. </em>
</p><p>“Wanna stay here,” he told Kaiya as she passed their son off to another nurse.</p><p>“Oh, um, well…” Kaiya began, but Poppy interrupted her.</p><p>“Tora, you should go wait in recovery with Tyson,” she said. “Skin-to-skin is important. He needs you.”</p><p>“Bobby, I wanna be with y-“</p><p>Poppy shook her head. “I’ll be okay. We gotta trust them, remember? Now, go hold our son, mister. I’ll be right there, I promise.”</p><p>He thought back to hours earlier when he texted Avery. He had the spare key to their home and was going to take care of Callum, look after their house while they were away.</p><p>
  <em>It was nice to know there were people outside of their family who could be trusted with his and Poppy’s most precious things. </em>
</p><p>“’Kay, whatever ya say, boss,” he murmured to her and pressed a kiss to her lips. “See ya soon. Or else.”</p><p>Poppy smiled before he turned and looked at Kaiya over his shoulder.</p><p>“Follow me, Dad. I’ll get you all set up,” Kaiya said and opened the door he’d walked in through.</p><p>---</p><p>After just having been decked out in medical gear from head to toe, being shirtless in a hospital room felt weird.</p><p>He sat semi-reclined back in an overstuffed chair in the recovery room; it was propped beneath a large window and if he craned his neck, he could see cars driving into Parking Lot 4, where he and Poppy had pulled into hours ago. About to embark on the same journey they’d just been on.</p><p>Except <em>they we</em>re at the right fucking door.</p><p>Warm, hazy sunlight was spilling into the room; Tora could see dust motes dancing in the rays of light, slowly trickling down to the floor. He was thankful his son had been born on a nice day. It meant easy driving for Granny from Moonbright to the hospital.</p><p>He’d texted her and Quincey not long after he’d been escorted into the recovery room; they’d both reacted the same way, with several exclamation marks and demanding pictures. Tora sent one of the photos Kaiya had taken and then quickly pocketed his phone when she walked into the room, her arms wrapped around the blanketed bundle that was his son.</p><p>“Hi, Dad,” she said quietly. “If you want to go ahead and recline back a bit, I’ll take the blanket off the little man here and lay him down on your chest.”</p><p>Tora could do nothing but nod; he was about to hold his son for the first time and he had no words. None that could make sense of any of it.</p><p>He settled his bare back into the plush chair and held his breath as the nurse unwrapped Tyson in front of him like a present. He was quiet until the blanket left his skin and then he howled as his arms sprawled out in front of him.</p><p>“He’s a wild one,” she chuckled as she lowered him into Tora’s arms. “Go ahead and spread him out on his belly… yup, just like that. Psh, you got this. Sure this is your first kid?”</p><p>Tora couldn’t answer her.</p><p>His attention, his voice, every cell in his body had been taken captive by the feel of his son lying over the place where his heart thumped in his chest.</p><p>As soon as Tyson had been placed against his warm skin, he’d quieted, snuffling and pressing his cheek into the space beneath his collarbone, seemingly content. He splayed one palm over Tyson’s back; Christ, it covered nearly every inch of his pink skin, from the bottom of his neck to nearly the top of the diaper they’d wrapped him in.</p><p>He was so<em> tiny</em>.</p><p>How could someone so small take up so much space in his head, his heart?</p><p>He’d just met his son, barely knew him, but already loved him as much as Poppy. How was that possible? How did he already know he’d die for this little person in his arms?</p><p>He’d do… <em>anything </em>for him.</p><p>“It looks like you’ve got this,” Kaiya whispered. “I’m going to get things prepped for Poppy to join you. If you need anything at all, this button here”- she pointed to a remote on the hospital bed- “buzzes down to the nurse’s station. Give us a holler, okay? Mom should be here soon.”</p><p>“’Kay,” he murmured as he gently rubbed a circle onto Tyson’s back with two fingers. “Thanks, Kaiya.”</p><p>“Anytime.”</p><p>The wiry little nurse exited the room and then they were alone.</p><p>Tora sat quietly for several minutes, reveling in the weight of Tyson on his chest, of his steady little breaths. Slowly, so as not to disturb his son, Tora stretched his neck downward to touch his face to Tyson’s wild mess of dark hair; little feathers passing over his cheek. </p><p>“Fuckin’ hell, Bean,” he murmured against the top of his son’s head. “Ya really are perfect, ain’t ya? Didn’t think anyone could be as perfect as yer mom, but here ya are.”</p><p>Tyson stirred a little, sliding his tiny hand down so it curled into a fist just below his chin.</p><p>“Yeah, yeah. She’ll be here soon, but I ain’t so bad, right?” he asked.</p><p>Tyson let out a soft grunt and Tora smirked. “We’ll talk about this later, punk,” he said as the door opened and Kaiya wheeled Poppy into the room. The dam of his chest flooded with relief as he met her eyes; she was already crying, her hands over her mouth.</p><p>
  <em>She’s okay.</em>
</p><p>“Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted her. “How are ya?”</p><p>She pulled her hands away and smiled at him, her eyes flickering back and forth between his face and their son still curled into a ball on Tora’s chest.</p><p>“Better now,” she said.</p><p>---</p><p>“It’s like he doesn’t want to latch,” Poppy said, her voice deflated with disappointment as she cradled Tyson’s head to her bare breast. “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.”</p><p>“Nah, ain’t you, Bobby,” Tora told her. “They’re fuckin’ great. Trust me. Kid’s just stubborn, doesn’t know what’s good for him.”</p><p>Poppy smirked at him. “Tora, we’re really going to need to talk about your language,” she said, her voice lighter this time, bordering on a laugh.</p><p>“Pfft.” He wasn’t about to tell her what his first words to Tyson were while they’d been doing skin-to-skin.</p><p>“Don’t worry, sugar, you’re doing fine,” Kaiya reassured Poppy from the foot of the hospital bed. “Sometimes it takes them a minute. And if it’ll make you feel better, I can ask the lactation consultant to come speak with you later on.”</p><p>“Okay, yeah. I’d like to try it on my own for a little longer first, if that’s all right,” Poppy told the nurse.</p><p>“Of course! I’m sure the little man-cub will figure it out soon.”</p><p>Tora squinted at the nurse curiously. “What’d ya just call him?”</p><p>“Oh,” Kaiya said, casting her eyes to the floor and worrying her bottom lip. “Um, man-cub? Like… Mowgli from The Jungle Book? Dr. Mori started it and it sort of stuck. All the nurses are calling him that; we’ve never seen a baby here with so much hair before. It’s a compliment, promise!”</p><p>He smiled, still unsure of the reference. He’d never seen the movie before.</p><p>“I like it,” Poppy laughed and shifted her eyes to Tora, seemingly reading his mind. “We’ll have to watch it when we get h- <em>oh</em>.” Poppy’s face suddenly changed, her eyes widening and her chin jutting downward as she bit her lip around an awkward smile.</p><p>“S’wrong?” Tora asked her, beginning to press himself out of his chair.</p><p>“Nothing, um, man-cub figured it out,” she said as she peered down at their son. “And it feels so <em>weird.</em> Sort of like my body knows it’s natural but, not like, um…” She stopped, her cheeks blushing red as a thought occurred to her.</p><p>“Not like what, Bobby?”</p><p>Her cheeks blazed even brighter as she regarded Kaiya, who had begun busying herself at a counter on the far side of the room. “Not like when <em>you </em>do it. It feels… different than that,” she whispered.</p><p>Tora barked out a laugh. “Well, I’d hope so, sweetheart.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Oh my god, he’s so perfect, I could cry. So <em>handsome</em>,” Quincey said as he cradled Tyson in his arms. Quincey’s blue gaze met Tora’s. “Are you sure you had anything to do with this, honey?”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes. “Fuck off, Quince.”</p><p>“Tora, <em>language</em>,” Poppy murmured sleepily from the bed.</p><p>“Yeah, honey. Watch your mouth,” Quincey smirked at him and gazed back down at Tyson, who was snuffling around in the bundled blanket. “Oooh, you’re awake! Look at those pretty eyes, sort of blue like mine. Good choice.”</p><p>“Ain’t a choice,” Tora told him. “Gonna change as he gets older. Thought ya aced that birthin’ class you went to?”</p><p>“I hope he has your eyes, Tora,” Poppy yawned.</p><p>His brother ignored them. ”I’m your favorite Uncle Quincey and I’m going to spoil you so much you’ll never want to leave my house.”</p><p>“Christ, ya already ruined my dog,” Tora told his brother. “Ain’t gonna ruin my kid, too.”</p><p>“Tora, you haven’t been a dad as long as I’ve been an uncle, so I don’t expect you to understand. You have a lot to learn. <em>As </em>Callum and Tyson’s favorite uncle, it’s my job.”</p><p>“Can I hold him now, Quincey?” Jonathan asked as he sidled up next to his fiancé.</p><p>“Um, honeypot, I just got him. You can wait your turn.”</p><p>For the first time ever, Tora saw Jonathan roll his eyes at Quincey and in that moment, his respect ticked up a couple more notches for the tall Dutch man. “You’ve been holding him for half an hour.”</p><p>Before Tora could tell him to let Jonathan hold Tyson, Quincey’s eyes snapped shut as a look of pure disgust rolled over his face. “Oh, oh my <em>god. </em>That is rancid. I think this kid just shit his pants.”</p><p>“Quincey, watch your words!” Poppy squeaked from the bed.</p><p>Quincey ignored her and pressed their son into the arms of the other blonde man, the repulsed look still pinching at his facial features. “Here, take him, honeypot. He’s all yours.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Poppy girl, he’s incredible,” Granny said when she finally arrived at the hospital and had a sleeping Tyson curled into her chest. “I think he might even be cuter than you when you were born.”</p><p>Tora smirked as Poppy playfully rolled her eyes at the older woman. “Gee, Granny, thanks a lot.”</p><p>Granny laughed. “I think it’s the hair. He’s so tiny, but so grown up looking at the same time. What was that you were calling him before?”</p><p>“Man-cub?” Tora said.</p><p>“Yes, it’s the perfect name for him. I almost like it better than Tyson,” Granny teased. “Or maybe Charlie? After your dear old dad?”</p><p>“Granny, this is a guilt-trip free zone,” Poppy laughed. “I promise, we’re naming our next one Charlie.”</p><p>Tora snorted. “Can we let this kid get a lil’ bigger before we start talkin’ ‘bout the next one?” he asked.</p><p>“No time like the present, young man,” Granny told him. “And who knows how long I am for this world…”</p><p>Pfft. Feisty ass little women. They’d been in his life for years: Alice, Poppy, Granny and there were <em>still </em>days when he felt like he wasn’t sure what to do or say around them. Always unpredictable, sassy and ganging up on him.</p><p>Thank Christ he wasn’t raising one. He wouldn’t know <em>what </em>the hell to do then.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>One Week Later</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>Tora startled awake at the sound of crying at the foot of his and Poppy’s bed. He lifted his legs out from the covers immediately and hoisted himself from the mattress. Since they’d brought Tyson home, Tora had slept very little; it seemed he was constantly on the edge of wakefulness, his body always aware that his son might need him any minute.</p><p>Poppy slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. “Is he hungry again?” she yawned and threw a glance at the alarm clock on her nightstand. “I just fed him half an hour ago.”</p><p>“Dunno, Bobby. We can give it a try, though,” he said and approached the bassinet to gather their son into his arms. Callum stood up from where he'd been lying on the rug, at the end of Tyson's bed.</p><p>The dog had taken to him instantly and reacted any time Tyson was near; Callum followed Poppy and Tora when they moved the baby into another room and sniffed at his head when they cradled him on the couch.</p><p>“He’s okay, punk,” Tora murmured to the Cavapoo and rounded the bed to hand Tyson to Poppy.</p><p>She slipped out of her nightshirt and angled Tyson’s head so his mouth was positioned over her bare breast. Tora stood and watched as their son snuffled a bit around her nipple and then turned his head away, continuing to cry.</p><p>“I don’t think he wants it,” she said, peering up at Tora. “He might not be hungry.”</p><p>“S’okay,” Tora said and gestured for her to hand Tyson over to him. “Gonna go check his diaper, maybe walk around with him a little bit. See if that helps get him back to sleep.”</p><p>“Tora, it’s okay, I can do it,” she told him and pulled her nightshirt back over her head. She went to toss the blankets aside, but Tora stopped her with one hand, his other cradling Tyson.</p><p>“Bobby, ya been through a lot. Ya need rest. Go back to sleep, I got him.”</p><p>“But-“</p><p>“Poppylan,” he said firmly. “Lay <em>down</em>.”</p><p>She stuck her tongue out at him and dipped her head back into her pillow. “Bully,” she said and smiled up at him.</p><p>“Stubborn ass lil’ hamster,” he retorted and walked out of the room before she could tell him to watch his language.</p><p>---</p><p>“’Kay, man-cub, talk to me. Whaddya need?” Tora asked the tiny person that was still wailing in his arms. Callum trotted closely at Tora’s feet, following him from one room into the next.</p><p>“Didn’t want yer mom’s tit, which is <em>crazy</em>,” Tora said as he ventured into the nursery. “Yer diaper’s dry… Wanna walk around for a bit?” He hoisted the star-printed fabric baby carrier from its hook and brought it over to the changing table, where he laid Tyson down on his back.</p><p>Tora attached the contraption to his chest; he’d learned very quickly that he had to loosen the straps as far as he could in order to get it over his shoulders. They just didn’t make much shit to suit his large size.</p><p>He gently placed Tyson into the carrier and once he was secure, Tora moved out of the nursery and down the stairs, trying to take him somewhere where Poppy wouldn’t easily hear his cries.</p><p>“C’mon kid, help me out,” Tora murmured to Tyson as he made yet another lap in the living room; so far, it had done nothing to quiet his stubborn little son. “Ain’t hungry, not up for a cruise… what are ya, bored? Too young to be bored already.”</p><p>Tyson’s cries grew in volume, as if to say, “<em>You don’t know what you’re talking about, old man.”</em></p><p>Tora sighed and patted Tyson’s back through the carrier. “Ya ain’t gonna be bored forever, man-cub. Gonna meet lots of new people, learn new stuff every day. Hell, we’re even takin’ ya to the Ren Fair in October. Yer mom’s a nerd and probably has plans to decorate your stroller like a carriage or some shit…”</p><p>
  <em>Our baby is going to be a nerd just like its mother. </em>
</p><p>“Want me to read to ya?” Tora asked over Tyson’s sobs. He hadn’t gotten the chance to do that just yet, not with the slew of visitors at their house and adjusting to a new schedule. This was the perfect time.</p><p>Tora moved back up the stairs, the sound of Callum’s nails clicking on the wood steps barely audible over his son’s cries. He stepped into the nursery and withdrew their copy of <em>If You Give a Mouse a Cookie </em>from the small, thrifted bookshelf.</p><p>He padded softly back downstairs and perched himself on the couch, unclipping the carrier and carefully slipping it over his head. He lifted Tyson out of it and settled him across his bare chest, right over his heart. Callum jumped onto the couch and plopped himself down between Tora’s legs, eager as ever to be near the tiny new person in their house.</p><p>With one hand supporting Tyson, Tora used the other to awkwardly hold up the open book in front of him. “<em>’If you give a mouse a cookie, he’s going to ask for a glass of milk. When you give him the milk, he’ll probably ask you for a straw.’”</em></p><p>Tora glanced down at Tyson, who was still crying against his skin.</p><p>He continued.</p><p>“’<em>When he’s finished, he’ll ask for a napkin. Then he’ll want to look in a mirror to make sure he doesn’t have a milk mustache.’”</em></p><p>Tora paused and smiled as his baby’s cries simmered to soft whimpers and grunts.</p><p>“'<em>When he looks into the mirror, he might notice his hair needs a trim. So he’ll probably ask for a pair of nail scissors.’”</em></p><p>Tora read on. Every now and then, Tyson released a tiny snuffle and then quieted down once more.</p><p>When he reached the last page and said the last word out loud, he settled the book on top of his thighs and peered down at his son.</p><p>He was fast asleep.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Kitsune</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora prepare Tyson to become a big brother. </p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Eeeeek, here's the second to last chapter of Stages! SO CRAZY to think that this series will be finished before the end of April. I'll probably need a few days (or weeks) of ugly crying before I begin serious work on Featherweight Queens LOL.</p><p>Special shoutout to two of my favorite moms, CopyPastel and OneAndOnlyTako for their baby/motherhood advice. It's saved my sanity so many times and I can't begin to thank them enough for being as excited about Tora and Poppy's growing family as I've been &lt;3</p><p>Thank you to Spotlightgirlontherun for the suggestion of Poppy and Tora's second pregnancy/child :) </p><p>Also... HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEGONIAREX! Everyone go shower her with birthday love on IG @begonia_reads 🎉🎉🎉</p><p>I hope you all enjoy! Thank you for still being here after all this time; I'm so grateful for all the connections and friends I've made along the way &lt;3 </p><p>Love you all and see you soon, </p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>Come hang out with me on Instagram: @peanut.butterandchelly<br/>I LOVE chatting with you all!</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“And I hope when you are sad you won’t be ashamed to cry</p><p>And I hope when you get mad you won’t keep it all inside</p><p>I hope you know that feeling bad is a normal part of life</p><p>Still I hope you’ll be happy most of the time</p><p>Yeah, I hope you’ll be happy most of the time”</p><p> </p><p>-Kimya Dawson, “You Are My Baby”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Five Years Later</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>It was 7:00 in the evening when Tora finally pulled into his driveway, tired and sore from walking on concrete all day at work. When he slid out of his Subaru and stood to his full height, he rolled his shoulders back and forth, worked his neck side to side and sighed with relief as his bones crackled and popped beneath his skin.</p><p>He tilted his head toward the sky. He’d spent his thirty-minute commute home chasing the last remaining threads of sunlight until they were finally unraveled by the creeping fingers of dusk, stretching far past Tora’s windshield.</p><p>Tora smiled as his gaze snagged on the soft glow of the porch light to his right; Poppy was always doing that, keeping an eye out for him and making sure he could see his way up the sidewalk.</p><p>He slammed his car door shut and hit the lock button on the key fob so the car chirped three times, his little way of alerting Tyson and Callum that he was home. When he finally opened the front door, they’d both be standing there, wiggling and eager for his attention.</p><p>Sometimes Poppy would swoop in from behind them and steal a kiss from Tora first, which always resulted in Tyson huffing out an annoyed sigh and arguing that his mom needed to “wait her turn.”</p><p>At the thought of his family waiting for him on the other side of the red door, Tora hustled up the sidewalk, ignoring the twinges of his back as it protested his brisk pace.</p><p>Despite his distance from the clan, his progress in therapy over the years, there were still moments when he couldn’t believe it was real, that <em>this</em>, speed-walking up the pathway to his house where his wife and child lived, back and legs sore from a normal nine-to-five job, was his life.</p><p>Though now few and far between, these moments bubbled up randomly in his mind like sewage from a dirty drain, revolting, half-convincing him that he was still under Vincent’s thumb. Randomly scratching at the place on his neck where the Balthuman crest had been erased. Barely surviving.</p><p>Afraid.</p><p>Afraid that he wouldn’t live to see another day. And worse, that he would wake up to find out that he’d only dreamt of his dog, his son. Of Poppy, this perfect woman who wasn’t truly ever his.</p><p>And then… he would open the red door.</p><p>Light, laughter. The smell of a homemade meal being kept warm for him in the oven. The sound of some Studio Ghibli movie playing in the background, Tyson’s favorites. Callum’s barks. Poppy and Tyson’s playful bickering. Some days they never stopped; they were too much alike, too stubborn and feisty for their own good.</p><p>It was the best wake-up call he could ever ask for.</p><p>Tora could still remember the first time he’d come home from work and opened the door to an audience. He’d spotted Poppy holding a then one-year old Tyson up to the front window, pointing in Tora’s direction; Tyson’s little face had broken out into a big, gummy smile the moment he spotted Tora through the glass.</p><p>Tora had been so anxious to get the front door open, to hold his son in his arms that he’d dropped his keys on the sidewalk and then stumbled when he finally stepped through the door. When he righted himself, he immediately turned to Poppy, who knew exactly what he needed.</p><p>Without hesitating, she shifted their son into his arms. Tyson’s chubby little hands had already been reaching for him, his fingers outstretched toward Tora’s hair. He’d stopped his pulling habit a few months ago, content enough now to just stroke Tora’s long, black locks.</p><p>Tora had buried his nose in his son’s own thick hair and inhaled, letting the smell of home trickle inside his body and fill him up. He’d glanced over Tyson’s head then and met Poppy’s warm, brown gaze; she smiled and reached up to gently swipe her finger at the corner of his eye.</p><p>He hadn’t even realized he’d been crying.</p><p>The greetings had evolved over the years as Tyson grew, becoming more playful, involving roughhousing and teasing. But there were always hugs, no matter what. Freely offered and readily given. The best part of Tora’s day.</p><p>As Tora turned the key in the lock, he cracked a smile at the sound of Callum’s barking on the other side. When he pushed the door inward, he was greeted by a wave of warm air that smelled like seasoned beef, the sound of metal clanking in the kitchen; his clumsy wife preparing dinner. A happy Callum, tail wagging in a blur behind him as he trotted up to Tora.</p><p>But no Tyson.</p><p>“Hey punk. Yeah, high fives,” Tora said as he stooped low to tap his hands against the Cavapoo’s outstretched front paws. “Where’s ya lil’ brother, huh?”</p><p>Tora toed off his work boots and followed the smell of dinner into the kitchen, where Poppy was hovering over the stove. “Hey, Bobby,” he called out to her, hoping she’d hear him over the sound of the hood running. She turned and threw a small smile at him over her shoulder.</p><p>“Hey, handsome,” she answered and when his large hands cupped her hips from behind, he felt her sigh and then lean into him.</p><p>He brushed her ponytail away and pressed a kiss to the nape of her neck, the stray little hairs tickling his lips. “How was yer day?” he asked beside her ear.</p><p>At this, Poppy set the metal tongs in her hand on the counter and turned around to face him. Her belly rustled against his guard belt and he smiled, letting his fingers trail across it.</p><p>“Well, I had a video meeting with Gil this morning, then a conference call with Quincey. I couldn’t get Callum to poop all day, not even on our afternoon walk. Oh, and Tyson is in time out.”</p><p>“Fuck, again? What’d he do this time?” Tora asked, shaking his head.</p><p>Poppy’s eyes blazed beneath her lashes. “<em>Language</em>,” she hissed, nodding her head toward the kitchen island. “Ty, why don’t you go ahead and tell your dad why you’re in time out?”</p><p>Tora peered around the kitchen counter and was met with the sight of one small, socked foot sprawled out across the floor. A tuft of wild, black hair slowly emerged from the corner, followed by a pair of big brown eyes. They blinked at Tora guiltily.</p><p>“I was climbing again,” his five-year old mumbled, dropping his eyes to study something on the floor.</p><p>“What were you climbing?” Poppy asked.</p><p>“Um, the fridge,” Tyson replied, his tiny fingers plucking a piece of fuzz from the tile.</p><p>Tora’s eyes widened. “The fridge?” he asked. “How the hell did ya do that?”</p><p>At his dad’s question, Tyson perked up. “I-I lifted myself up on the counter and then I stepped on Mama’s books and got to the top.”</p><p>“He was after the candy bowl,” Poppy informed Tora. “I told him he could have some after dinner, but he didn’t want to listen.”</p><p>Tora smirked. Clever little shit. “Hmmpf. Jesus, kid. How’d ya even thi-“</p><p>Poppy cut him off with a fierce gaze. “Tora, he’s in <em>trouble</em>,” she murmured. “What he did isn’t okay.”</p><p>“I agree, s’not okay,” Tora nodded. “Gotta admit it’s fuckin’ impressive though,” he whispered to her.</p><p>Poppy pulled a dish towel hanging from the oven handle and swatted at his ass with it. “Stop it!” she hissed, but he could see a fleck of humor shining in her eyes. “It’s not funny.”</p><p>“Calm down, feisty lil’ hamster. I’ll deal with it,” he told her and when she turned back to the stove, he lifted his arm to skim the top of the fridge and swiped a piece of candy from the bowl. He tucked it into his pocket as he rounded the countertop island.</p><p>“C’mon, man-cub,” Tora said, nodding his head at Tyson. “Gotta go change out of these clothes and then we’re gonna have a talk.”</p><p>---</p><p>Tora stepped through the third doorway in the hall with Tyson and Callum at his heels. He padded across the gray carpeting and paused for a moment, smiling as he admired the mural of the night sky Poppy painted on the wall behind the dark wood crib. Large gold moons, white stars and in the bottom corner, Tora, Poppy and Tyson’s white painted handprints.  </p><p>Tora then turned, lowering himself into the overstuffed chair in the corner. Once he was settled, he met Tyson’s brown-eyed gaze and patted his lap.</p><p>“C’mere, man-cub,” he said and helped hoist his son onto his leg while Callum plopped himself down by Tora’s feet.</p><p>Tyson pushed pieces of his unruly black hair out of his eyes. “Daddy? Why’re we in Charlie’s room?”</p><p>Tora smoothed Tyson’s hair away from his round cheeks and sighed. “Yer hair’s gettin’ long, punk. Gonna have to let us cut it again soon.”</p><p>At this, Tyson’s eyes widened; he flattened his palms on top of his head, smooshing his hair down. “No. Nope, nope, nope.”</p><p>“Why not? Don’t ya miss bein’ able to see things?”</p><p>“I like long hair. You and Mama have it and I-I want it too,” Tyson told him firmly.</p><p>“Pfft. Well, can’t really argue with that, can I?” Tora chuckled and wrapped one arm around Tyson. “And we’re in Charlie’s room ‘cuz it’s important to think about him even if he’s not here yet. Where is he, Ty?”</p><p>“In Mama’s belly,” Tyson said matter-of-factly.</p><p>“S’right. And when he gets here, what will you be?” Tora asked.</p><p>“His big brother.”</p><p>“Right again, man-cub.” Tora gave his son’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. “And he’ll be yer lil’ brother. That means when Charlie’s finally here, he’s gonna look up to ya.”</p><p>Tyson straightened up on Tora’s lap. “Really?”</p><p>“Yeah, ‘course. Yer a cool kid, he’ll wanna be just like ya. He’ll be watchin’ everything you do and he’ll wanna do it too.”</p><p>Tyson beamed, flashing his little teeth at him. “Like h-how to play Trash Man?”</p><p>God damnit, his son was cute. “Uh-huh.”</p><p>“And-and where to look for the soot sprites?”</p><p>Tora smirked. “Mmmhmm, sure.”</p><p>“Digging up dino bones in the sandbox!” Tyson cried out and threw himself back, giggling against Tora’s chest.</p><p>“He’ll love all that,” Tora assured him. “Those are all <em>good </em>things to show him. Ya know what we <em>don’t </em>want to show him?”</p><p>Tyson blinked at him. “What?”</p><p>“Things that might hurt him,” Tora said. “Like crossin’ the street without a grown-up or climbin’ the fridge.”</p><p>At this, Tyson’s face softened and his shoulders pulled downward.</p><p>“Ya know why yer mom was upset when she caught ya climbin’ the fridge, man-cub?”</p><p>Beneath his thick bangs, Tora could see Tyson’s eyebrows knitting together. “’Cuz I’m not a’posed to have candy before dinner.”</p><p>“Well, that’s one reason she was upset,” Tora told him. “We want ya to eat good food first before you fill up on candy and ya should listen to her when she tells you no.”</p><p>“But the most important reason Mama got upset was ‘cuz she doesn’t want ya to get hurt. It scared her. ‘Member how we tell ya that Charlie’s busy growin’ inside her and she’s gotta keep him safe until he’s ready to come out?”</p><p>Tyson nodded, hooked on Tora’s every word. “Yeah, ‘cuz he’s little. Littler than me.”</p><p>“S’right. You may not be inside Mama’s belly anymore, but she still wants to keep you safe. And it’s yer job to listen when she tells ya not to do somethin’. Ain’t ‘cuz she’s being mean, but because she loves you and wants to protect ya.”</p><p>Tyson seemed to consider this for a moment and reached out to Tora, touching his palm gently to his cheek. “I don’t want to scare Mama, Daddy,” he finally said.</p><p>“I know ya don’t. I don’t, either.” Tora paused and rubbed a circle in the middle of his five-year old’s back with his thumb. “Y’know yer Uncle Quincey? What do ya tell me he is?”</p><p>At the mention of his favorite person in the world, Tyson jumped from Tora’s lap and began bouncing up and down on the floor. “Um… ‘noying!” he giggled.</p><p>Tora breathed a laugh out through his nose. Smartass kid was listening to his bedtime conversations with Poppy again. “Nah, s’what <em>I </em>call him. What else is he?”</p><p>Tyson jumped into the air and with a soft thud, he landed with his knees on the carpet. Callum rose to his feet. Seeing <em>his </em>favorite person so close to the floor, he trotted over to Tyson and began licking at his face.</p><p>Tyson squealed with laughter and then smiled up at Tora. “Awesome!”</p><p>“Hmmpf. That’s right, he’s awesome. You know, Uncle Quincey is <em>my </em>lil’ brother. Just like Charlie is yours.”</p><p>“He is?”</p><p>“Yeah. C’mere, punk,” Tora said and gestured to the floor between his feet. Tyson skipped over and landed where Tora pointed. “Yer Uncle Quincey looked up to me a lot when we were growin’ up. Ya know how he got to be so awesome?”</p><p>“How?”</p><p>Tora rotated his wrist inward and pointed at himself with one finger. “Me. As his big brother, it was my job to teach him how to be awesome. Are you gonna help me and yer mom teach Charlie how to be awesome? Like ya Uncle Quincey?”</p><p>“Yeah!”</p><p>“That means not climbing things yer not supposed to, right? And not scarin’ Mama? ‘Cuz those things are <em>not </em>awesome.”</p><p>Tyson nodded seriously at his dad. “Not awesome,” he repeated.</p><p>Tora smiled and outstretched his hand to pinch his son’s cheek. “S’right, man-cub. You got it.” He leaned back into the chair then and shifted his hips upward to pull the piece of candy from his pocket. He placed it in his large palm and held it out to Tyson.</p><p>“Normally I wouldn’t give this to ya before dinner,” Tora told him, “but I’m proud of you for sittin’ down and listening to me.”</p><p>As Tyson reached for the candy, Tora closed his hand. “Before ya take it, I want you to promise me yer gonna go downstairs, give Mama a big hug and tell her yer sorry for scarin’ her. Tell her yer gonna try to be a better listener, ‘kay? Can you do that, man-cub?”</p><p>With a five-year old, Tora knew not to expect a change in behavior overnight but liked the idea of planting the word ‘try’ in his young son’s mind.</p><p>
  <em>Try new things. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Try my best. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>At least I tried.</em>
</p><p>“I can do it, Daddy,” Tyson told him.</p><p>Tora smiled and opened his hand. “Okay, kid. Go ahead.”</p><p>---</p><p>After apologetic kisses and hugs had been handed out, dinner was eaten and as Tora began clearing the dishes from the table, he heard a crinkling sound and then Poppy’s voice.</p><p>“Tyson? Where did you get that?”</p><p>Tora turned around to see his son pulling the piece of candy from his shorts pocket, uneaten and still wrapped.</p><p>Tyson peered over at his mom. “Daddy gave it to me, but I know I’m not a’posed to have it until after dinner.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Three Months Later</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>Saturday evening, Tora returned with take-out from their favorite ramen place and Tyson wasn’t waiting at the door to greet him.</p><p>Before he’d left, the three of them and Callum had been curled up on the sofa, watching the end of <em>My Neighbor Totoro </em>for the thousandth time. When the end credits rolled and he pushed himself off the couch to get dinner, Poppy stood and waddled over to the Blu-Ray player, swapping out the fucking weird gray bear-rabbit movie for <em>Howl’s Moving Castle. </em></p><p>Tora rolled his eyes. “Again, Bobby?” he whispered as she settled back down onto the cushions. “S’like the tenth time this week.”</p><p>Poppy shrugged and smiled. “It’s his favorite,” she mouthed and ran a hand through Tyson’s wild hair as he cuddled back in beside her, transfixed by the tv screen.</p><p>He smirked. “Be back soon with food for you bums,” he said and slipped his feet into his black Converse.</p><p>Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Poppy lean over and whisper something into Tyson’s ear. Tyson immediately spun around in his seat and flashed Tora a big, goofy smile. “Thanks, Mr. Grumpy!” he called out to him.</p><p>Poppy’s shoulders shook with laughter; she turned her head slightly toward Tora and stuck out her tongue.</p><p>Tora snorted. “Welcome, punk.”</p><p>He made it back to the house in fifteen minutes and when he opened the red front door, bags of ramen swinging from his wrist, he was met with the sight of Tyson propped up on his knees beside Poppy on the couch, stacking stuffed animals into a tower on her swollen belly.</p><p>“Looks good, man-cub,” Tora said as he slipped inside and toed off his shoes. “Think it’s yer tallest one yet.”</p><p>Tyson said nothing; his wide brown eyes and attention were focused on the bright green triceratops he was placing on top of the stack.</p><p>“Ya hungry, Ty? Wanna have a picnic on the floor?” Tora asked as he rounded the couch and plunked the bags of food down on the coffee table.</p><p>Almost instantly, Tyson abandoned his fluffy Jenga tower and jumped from the sofa. “Yeah!”</p><p>“’Kay. Wanna go grab the picnic blanket? Ya know which one it is, over there in the basket,” Tora pointed.</p><p>“Kay!” Before Tyson approached the basket, he whipped around and pointed at Poppy, who was sitting still as a statue on the sofa. “Mama, you can’t get up. You’re trapped.”</p><p>Poppy frowned at him. “I can’t move? Well, that’s not fair. I’m hungry.”</p><p>“Nope,” Tyson said as he bounded across the room and pulled the blanket from the woven basket. “Can’t move.”</p><p>“Charlie’s hungry too, baby,” Poppy said.</p><p>Tyson seemed to consider this for a moment as he tugged the corners of the ratty, old blanket open. “Okay,” he finally nodded. “Charlie can eat.”</p><p>The three of them perched themselves on the blanket; Poppy and Tora pulled at their ramen, watching Tyson slurp his happily as he chattered to Callum, who sat at the edge of the old quilt, silently begging for food.</p><p>Once it seemed Tyson’s attention on the movie was completely lost, Tora reached for the remote.</p><p>“Gonna watch somethin’ else, kay, punk?” Tora asked, pointing it toward the tv.</p><p>Tyson’s mouth dropped open mid-noodle, causing it to slip down his chin. “No!” he cried. “No, Daddy, no! Don’t change it!”</p><p>Tora sighed. “But ya ain’t even watchin’ the movie.”</p><p>Tyson scrambled up from his seat on the blanket and pulled the remote out of Tora’s hands. “Am too! I’m watching Sophie!”</p><p>Tora threw his hand up in defeat. “Fine, <em>fine,</em>” he grumbled. “Watch ya damn movie.”</p><p>Tyson shuffled back to his spot on the blanket and crossed his legs, stuffing the remote between them. He picked up his bowl and continued eating, his eyes locked on the screen where Granny Sophie was forcing the talking fire to heat up breakfast.</p><p>From across the blanket, Tora caught Poppy smirking at him as if to say, <em>You should’ve known better than that.</em></p><p>“S’bullshit, Bobby,” Tora muttered under his breath.</p><p>“It's the life you chose, Dad,” she smiled.</p><p>Hmmpf.</p><p>It was.</p><p>And if he had the choice, he’d fucking do it all over again.</p><p>---</p><p>After dinner, Tora tucked himself onto one end of the sofa while Poppy and Tyson snuggled together on the other. As her belly grew, Tyson became more attached to the idea of his baby brother; like Callum, he was never far from Poppy when she sat down for a rest.</p><p>As they continued watching the Studio Ghibli movie, Tora’s gaze drifted to where Tyson’s tiny hand was gently tracing patterns over Poppy’s belly. “Hi baby, hi baby,” Tyson murmured quietly, eyes glued to the tv. Suddenly, he jerked his hand away from Poppy and let out a squeal of laughter.</p><p>“Whoa, did Charlie kick you?” Poppy laughed, pressing her hand over a spot at the top of her rounded stomach.</p><p>“Yeah, he kicked me! He kicked my hand!” Tyson giggled.</p><p>“That’s him saying hi. Here, gimme your hand, he’s still talking to you,” Poppy said, curling her fingers around Tyson’s wrist. She placed his palm over where Charlie must have been kicking and Tyson laughed again.</p><p>“H-he’s talking over here, Mama!” Tyson hollered, giggling as his fingers glided across his mom’s belly.</p><p>“He is. What do you think he’s saying?”</p><p>“Um, um… that he likes this movie, too. It’s his favorite,” Tyson replied.</p><p>Tora reached over and tugged on Tyson’s foot; his son’s head whipped around to look at him. “S’pretty neat, huh?” he asked his five-year old. “What’s it like, feelin’ yer baby brother kick?”</p><p>Tyson beamed at him. “It feels <em>awesome</em>, Daddy.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>One Week Later</strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>Phone chargers. Changes of clothes. Poppy’s favorite fleece blanket. A tiny onesie Tyson had picked out, with the words <strong>LIL BRO </strong>printed across the chest.</p><p>“Bobby, ya ready?” Tora called out as he zipped and then hefted the go bag over his arm.</p><p>“Yup!” he heard her answer through their bathroom door. It swung open and she waddled out with her purse dangling over one shoulder. “Sorry, just had to pee one more time before we left.”</p><p>“No sweat,” he told her and reached out for the strap of her bag, sliding it down her arm.</p><p>Poppy huffed at him. “<em>Tora</em>, I can carry-“</p><p>Tora cut her off. “Been together almost ten years, sweetheart. When are you gonna realize ya ain’t gonna win this argument with me?”</p><p>A scowl pinched her face together and he chuckled as he walked past her, dropping a kiss on her forehead. “C’mon, Bobby. Gotta say bye to the man-cub before we head to the hospital.”</p><p>---</p><p>“So you’re going to have a sleepover here with Uncle Quincey, Uncle Jon and Cal,” Poppy told their son as he blinked up at her. “And tomorrow, they’re going to bring you to the hospital to see me, Daddy and Charlie. Granny will be there too.”</p><p>“And Gramma Alice too?” Tyson asked.</p><p>Poppy peered over at Tora, then looked back down at Tyson. “Um, well, remember we told you that Gramma Alice is sick and has a hard time getting around?”</p><p>“Uh huh.”</p><p>“Going to the hospital would make her really tired and we want to make sure she gets plenty of rest. We’ll take you and Charlie to see her once we’re home, okay?”</p><p>“Kay, Mama.”</p><p>Tora swallowed hard. They hadn’t known about Alice’s lung cancer for long; it was late stage and wearing her down quickly. Tora had his first experience with death as a kid and never wished it on anyone, especially his young children. Unfortunately, the state of Alice’s health was out of Tora’s control and at the rate it was deteriorating, he and Poppy would be forced to have a difficult conversation with Tyson very soon.</p><p>
  <em>Let her hang on long enough to meet Charlie. Just once. </em>
</p><p>Tora took a deep breath and slowly released it, forcing air around the large lump in his throat, his chest. This was a happy day. They were going to have another baby, another tiny person to love.</p><p>As if sensing that the room needed a little brightening, Quincey stalked into the living room, rushing up behind Tyson; he flung him over his broad shoulder and held him down by the back of his thighs. Tyson screeched with laughter and continued giggling from behind Quincey’s back.</p><p>“Hmmm, that’s weird, I could have sworn I saw Ty in here a second ago. I smell his feet and <em>ooooh</em>, I see his legs,” Quincey said, pinching at Tyson’s calves, causing the five-year old to squeal and kick the air. “But where’s his head? I sure would love to talk to him.”</p><p>Tyson panted with laughter as he tried to wind himself under the arm Quincey held him with. Finally, he worked his head beneath his uncle’s elbow. “Uncle <em>Quinceeey,</em>” he giggled, “I-I’m down here!”</p><p>Quincey peered under his arm pit at his nephew’s bright red face. “Oh, there you are! Thank goodness. I was going to ask you what you wanted to do today. I brought new games, some books, a couple of movies…”</p><p>Tyson gripped the side of Quincey’s shirt in his little fists as he tried to climb down. “Um, uh, can-can we play spa?”</p><p>Quincey helped lower his nephew to the ground. “Oh honey, that’s what I was <em>hoping</em> you would say. I’ll paint your toes and you can pick out what face masks we use tonight, deal?” Quincey held out his pinky and Tyson eagerly curled his own tiny finger around it.</p><p>“Just make sure the nail polish stays on his toes this time, Quince,” Tora grumbled at his brother. “No more paintin’ the walls or my game controller.”</p><p>Quincey waved a dismissive hand at him. “Sure, sure, whatever you say. Listen, we’ll take care of the difficult stuff here; you guys go and have a baby or whatever.”</p><p>Poppy laughed as Quincey winked at her and leaned down to kiss her cheek. “You’ll do great, honey,” he told her. He turned to Tora then and wrapped him in a big hug.</p><p>“Text us when you can to let us know how it’s going, okay?”</p><p>Tora clapped one arm around Quincey’s back and squeezed for a couple of seconds before letting go. “Will do. Thanks, Quince. Thanks, Jon!” Tora called out to the other blonde man who was lounging on the sofa with Callum.</p><p>“Good luck! See you soon!” the Dutch man hollered back.</p><p>With one hand on the straps of the bags and the other intertwined with Poppy’s fingers, Tora stepped through the red front door.</p><p>---</p><p>Despite the fact that this c-section was planned and for the past month Poppy had attempted to make light of it by calling it a “Charlie-section,” Tora still had trouble remaining calm. Tyson’s had gone smoothly, but it didn’t change the fact that Poppy was once again going to be lying on a table, cut open and bleeding. That his second child was also going to be brought into the world in a room with no warmth, art or plants.</p><p>Shortly after they arrived at the hospital, they were checked in; Poppy slipped into a gown, then a nurse took her blood before hooking her up to an IV.</p><p>This time, they only waited for an hour in the labor and delivery room before Dr. Mori made her appearance, greeting them as if they were old friends. Shortly after the doctor arrived, Poppy signed the consent paperwork and her bed was wheeled down to the OR.</p><p>As Tora scrubbed his hands in the private bathroom, he couldn’t help but feel he’d been here only yesterday, preparing to meet Tyson for the first time. He’d been a dad for over five years, each one better than the last.</p><p>But… five whole years and still… <em>still </em>the icy fingers of doubt tended to creep up his spine, threatening to wrap around his throat and throttle the air from his lungs.</p><p>
  <em>Should I have done that? Maybe that was the wrong thing to say. Did I just hurt his feelings? Confuse him?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Am I completely ruining this kid? </em>
</p><p>And then Tyson would do <em>something</em>; he’d be his sweet, stubborn self, determined to tie his own shoes and carry Poppy’s purse for her when they went places together. To say goodnight to Poppy’s belly when they tucked him into bed. To climb the rock wall at the gym with Tora; the little shit had beaten him to the top last time.</p><p>To hold Callum’s leash when they went on family walks together. To call Granny and Gramma Alice every Sunday and tell them about his week. To play video games online with Uncle Gyu and Aunt Mirabelle.</p><p>To brag to his friends at daycare that his two uncles were his best friends.</p><p>To be an<em> awesome </em>big brother to Charlie.</p><p>As these thoughts warmed his body, the doubt began to melt against his skin and then trickled down his spine. His kid was awesome. And <em>he </em>had a part in that, saw parts of himself, the <em>good </em>parts in him every day.</p><p>How?</p><p>How the hell had he gotten so lucky? To have the chance to be the person he’d always wanted to be? To be <em>good</em>, to be in love with Poppy openly?</p><p>To raise their son to be a good man, the way they’d soon be teaching Charlie?</p><p>
  <em>How?</em>
</p><p>Tora patted his hands dry, letting his eyes linger on his reflection in the mirror. He tilted his head slightly to the right, smirking as the bare skin on the left side of his neck came into view.</p><p>He tossed the paper towel into the trash and tugged on his gloves, the crinkly gown, his three shower caps and his face mask.</p><p>It was go time.</p><p>---</p><p>“How ya doin’, sweetheart?” Tora asked, one hand clinging to hers while the other gently stroked her forehead.</p><p>“I’m okay,” she told him. “It helps when you’ve done it before. You already know what to expect.”</p><p>Tora snorted. “Speak for yerself. Hate that this is the way we gotta do it.”</p><p>“I know,” she said. “But it’s one part of it, just the beginning. Then we get to take our son home and-“</p><p>Dr. Mori’s voice drifted out from behind the large, blue curtain. “The baby’s on his way out! Here he comes- oh. <em>Oh.”</em></p><p>Poppy’s wide eyes locked onto Tora’s. “Oh <em>what</em>?” she cried out. “What’s wrong? Is he okay?”</p><p>“Well, um, at your last ultrasound, we had confirmed the baby was a boy but… it looks like we were wrong. It must have been the umbilical cord or her genitals were engorged from hormones…”</p><p>Tora’s heart thumped hard in his chest.</p><p>
  <em>Her?</em>
</p><p>“It looks like she out-foxed us all,” Dr. Mori laughed. “Tora, Poppy, you have a little girl.”</p><p>---</p><p>Thirty minutes later, Tora was perched in a recliner in the recovery room, cradling his tiny surprise daughter against his bare chest. She hadn’t been born with nearly as much hair on her head as Tyson, but a decent amount of soft brown locks feathered down to her neck.</p><p>Tora pressed a light kiss to the top of her head and placed one hand across her back, watching it rise and fall with her small breaths.</p><p>“Sneaky lil’ shit, ain’t ya?” he murmured to her. “Always gotta be on yer guard around feisty lil' women. Lucky for you, I already know how to take care of ‘em. Had plenty of practice with yer mom. Yer gettin’ junk food, plants and books for life, sweetheart.”</p><p>“Ain’t buyin’ you any of the pervy ones Mama reads, though,” he smirked. “She can teach ya all about that, but it ain’t gonna matter. You’re not datin’ anyone ‘til ya as old as Alice.”</p><p>The door opened then and Poppy was wheeled into the room, looking tired but bright, happy. “Hi,” she said, her voice quiet. “How is she?”</p><p>“Doin’ great,” he told her. “Pretty like you, Bobby.”</p><p>Poppy smirked at him as the nurse pushed her up to the bed and helped her climb into it. As soon as his wife was settled against the pillows, Tora stood and walked over to her bedside, gently lowering their daughter into Poppy’s waiting arms.</p><p>“There ya go, Charley,” he murmured. “Say hi to yer mom.”</p><p>---</p><p>An hour later, the door swung open and Tyson bounded into the room, making a beeline for Poppy’s bed. Their son was followed closely by Quincey and Jonathan, surrounded by a spray of pastel pink balloons shaped like stars and Hello Kitty.</p><p>“Christ, Quince, ain’t no room in here for all of ‘em,” Tora grumbled as he took the gift bag the balloons were attached to.</p><p>“You’re welcome, honey,” Quincey said with his hands on his hips. “How’s my little niece doing?”</p><p>“She’s good, Quince. Full of fuckin’ surprises, but she’s great.”</p><p>“Mmm. Yeah, about that,” Quincey said, lowering his voice to a whisper, “after Honeypot and I got your text about her missing penis, we tried to explain to Tyson that he was getting a sister instead of a brother. I don’t know how well it sunk in.”</p><p>
  <em>Fuck. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>If I’m bein’ honest, I’m fuckin’ terrified of disappointing our kids. I’d never wanna let ‘em down.</em>
</p><p>“’Kay,” Tora said slowly. “Uh, we’ll figure it out.”</p><p>Quincey nodded at him once and then joined Tyson and Jonathan at Poppy’s bedside. Tora watched as Tyson began to make an attempt to climb into the bed and walked over to help him.</p><p>“Hey, man-cub, gotta be careful with Mama for a bit,” he said as he lowered his son onto the bed next to Poppy. “She has a scratch on her belly and it’s gonna take a lil’ while to heal.”</p><p>Tyson’s eyes widened. “Mama, a-are you okay? Want me to kiss it better?”</p><p>Poppy smiled. “Sure, baby. Right here,” she said and tapped at her upper belly, several inches above the site of her incision. Tyson lowered his head and placed a gentle kiss against the fabric of her hospital gown.</p><p>Poppy wrapped her arms around Tyson and gave him a squeeze. “Thank you. You’re such a sweetheart. Now, do you want to meet your baby sister?”</p><p>Tyson bobbed his head up and down. “Yeah! I wanna hold the baby.”</p><p>“Okay. I’ll help you, she’s really small and we have to be careful with her,” Poppy told him.</p><p>“I’ll be careful, Mama.”</p><p>Tora carefully rolled the plastic hospital bassinet to the side of Poppy’s bed and lifted out the blanketed bundle that was his daughter. “Here ya go, man-cub. This is Charlotte,” Tora said as he placed her onto Poppy’s lap. She shifted their little girl around so she was supporting her head and her bottom half was propped up by Tyson’s legs.</p><p>“So <em>this </em>is the clever little fox,” Quincey breathed as he leaned over Tyson’s shoulder to peer down at her.</p><p>“Hello, kitsune,” Quincey said as he lowered his hand to stroke Charlotte’s cheek with his finger. “What do you think, honey? Do you like her?” he asked Tyson.</p><p>For a moment, Tyson didn’t speak. He sat still, as still as Tora had ever seen him, as though his son thought he might break her if he moved. His eyes were wide and round as he studied at Charlotte’s face. Tyson’s mouth dropped open and lifted at the corners when his sister’s eyes flickered open and stared directly at him.</p><p>“Hi baby, I love you,” he whispered and leaned over his mom’s lap to drop a soft kiss on Charlotte’s forehead.</p><p>Tora sucked in a breath as his heart shattered in his chest. <em>He loved her</em>. It was going to be okay.</p><p>“Isn’t she pretty, Ty?” Poppy asked him.</p><p>“She’s so pretty, Mama,” he murmured, seemingly still in awe at the tiny person he was holding.</p><p>“Think yer gonna like havin’ a baby sister?” Tora asked. “Gonna teach her how to be awesome?”</p><p>Tyson looked up at his dad. “Uh huh.” His gaze fell then and he shifted his head from one side to the other, appearing to scan the room for something.</p><p>“Whatcha lookin’ for, man-cub?” Tora asked.</p><p>Tyson’s big brown eyes found Tora’s, quizzical, his eyebrows a knitted line across his forehead.</p><p>“Where’s my brother?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fun fact: "kitsune" is the Japanese word for "fox" :)</p><p>As uncommon as it is, I stumbled across an article online about a woman who was told she was having a boy and then gave birth to a baby girl instead. I couldn't believe it! I already knew Charlotte would grow up to be an unpredictable little girl full of surprises and this was the BEST entrance she could've possibly made lol.</p><p>**I was in such a rush to get this chapter out that I forgot to say THANK YOU to my husband Travis for helping me figure out how to end the "no climbing" talk lol. He immediately came up with Tyson waiting to eat his candy after dinner: "It shows GROWTH, Chels!" I love that stupidly supportive man with all my heart**</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Life to Come</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poppy and Tora celebrate Halloween with their family.</p><p>Told from Tora's POV</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well guys, this is it. The last one. </p><p>I honestly don't even know what to say. When I posted the first chapter of Stages, not knowing where the story was heading, I had no idea it would lead me here, to the end of a SERIES. I would NEVER have made it this far if it weren't for all the love and support I've received from this community since the beginning. </p><p>You ALL helped me write this collection of short stories and because of this, it's essentially a love letter from me to you. I can't even begin to say how much I've appreciated every single one of you. ALL of my readers (there are too many of you to name and for that I'm forever grateful), my Smut Sisters (CopyPastel, OneAndOnlyTako, BegoniaRex, TheCurvedWritingDesk) my best friend Gaby, my husband Travis. You've ALL had a hand in this somewhere and I hope you see yourselves in every word. </p><p>Ok, I'll stop gushing now lol. I hope you enjoy this last chapter. In the end, I think most of us just want Tora and Poppy to be happy, whatever that looks like for them. Realistic or not, this is what it looks like to me :) </p><p>I'll be back shortly with Featherweight Queens (I'm going to take a little time to ugly cry, outline and adjust the gears in my brain... backtracking from Happy Dad Tora to Angry Clan Tora will be interesting LOL). I hope I see you then &lt;3</p><p>I love you all,</p><p>pb&amp;c</p><p>---</p><p>Come hang out with me on Instagram: @peanut.butterandchelly<br/>I LOVE chatting with you all!</p><p>---</p><p>All rights to these characters and the original story belong to the goddess known as Lilydusk.</p><p>---</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I didn't see this comin', I admit it<br/>But if you think I'll buckle, forget it<br/>I told you that I'd be the one<br/>I'll be there in the life to come”</p><p>-The Killers, “Life to Come”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong>Two Years Later</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>---</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong> <em>Tora</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>Tora stood in the living room, feet hip-width apart and his hands clasped together in front of him, elbows sharp. When the woman on the television prompted him to, he inhaled deeply.</p><p>“Okay, good!” the perky blonde woman praised him. “Aaaand down we go.”</p><p>He lowered himself into a sitting position and held it as she counted to five. When she finished, he let out a long, low exhale as he straightened his legs out and stood tall.</p><p>“Great job, ladies! Let’s go again, give me ten more. I know you can do it! Doooown. You got this. Up, down. Uuuupppp, dooooown.”</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes as he continued to follow her movements, engaging his core as he pressed himself down to sit in an invisible chair and then releasing as he rose back up.</p><p>“Awesome! Go ahead and take a little breather if you need to,” the woman told him. “Grab a drink of water, adjust your sports bra, whatever you gotta do. We’re not here to judge!”</p><p>Tora snorted as he reached for his tumbler and took a deep drink of cool water.</p><p>As a husband and father of two, he had less time than ever to spend working out in the local gym.</p><p>Not that he minded.</p><p>As he brought himself down into another squat, he thought back to the several years he’d spent training in the cold, desolate gyms of Narin City, adding mass to his body, building muscle and at the same time wasting away, slowly losing more and more of himself. Back then, he’d needed to be in superior physical shape to have a fighting chance of surviving the streets, the clan, Vincent.</p><p>His body was a that of a predator; a weapon with no chance for misfire, no room for error.</p><p>And now? Now it was a sanctuary for his wife and a playground for a first grader and a two-year-old toddler.</p><p>He wasn’t nearly as fit as he’d been in his 20’s; slightly less tone, but still strong. Tora <em>wanted </em>to be strong; the muscles he was maintaining now allowed him to lift and to play with his kids, to give Poppy piggyback rides, to hoist her over his shoulder and carry her into their bedroom.</p><p>To hug them and hold them all tight.</p><p>Now? Now his body was his. And it was <em>theirs. </em></p><p>Now, instead of the twenty-four hour gym on main street, he exercised in a cluttered family room, surrounded by a couple of colorful child-sized yoga mats rolled up in the corner, a few sets of Poppy’s free weights nestled under the coffee table and a small stack of her cheesy workout tapes on the tv stand.</p><p>It was the only place he wanted to be.</p><p>Poppy had said that she would fully embrace him developing a “dad-bod,” joking that he would finally match her “mom-bod.” After he made her explain what the hell <em>that</em> meant, he proceeded to pinch her cheek and tell her that her body had been through hell twice and it was even more beautiful to him because of it. The permanent pooch of her stomach? The strong foundation of the home her body had built for their two kids. Her stretch marks? Badges of fucking honor.</p><p>One day she’d see herself the way he saw her. Even if it meant spending the rest of his life convincing her.</p><p>As Tora drew himself into another squat, a flash of movement at the corner of his eye snagged his attention. He watched with a smirk as his little brown-haired girl waddled up beside him, the tv remote clutched in one of her tiny hands.</p><p>“Oooh no, don’tcha even think about changin’ it,” he said. “It’s Daddy’s tv time. Still got ten minutes left on the clock, kit.”</p><p>She turned her face up to him, her amber eyes locking onto his as she regarded him seriously. “I help, Daddy,” she said and pointed one little finger in at herself.</p><p>“Pfft. ‘Kay, whatever ya say, boss.”</p><p>Charley’s chubby finger found the volume button and she pressed down hard until the blonde woman was whispering to them through the speakers.</p><p>As Tora brought himself down into another squat, he watched Charlotte do the same, still a bit unsteady on her two-year old legs.</p><p>Suddenly, his daughter’s voice drifted up from below him. “Upt, dow. Upppppt, dooooow!”</p><p>Tora paused mid-squat and burst out laughing, silently appreciating how <em>easily</em> laughter came to him now. Charley glanced up at him and smiled wide, her tongue lolling out to lick her bottom lip, something he noticed she did whenever she was proud of herself.</p><p>She was turning into a cheeky little thing, just like her mom.</p><p>Fucking adorable.</p><p>“Ya doin’ baby squats down there?” he asked as soon as he managed to bottle up his laughter.</p><p>She nodded earnestly. “Yeah. I tired, Daddy,” she said and opened her mouth wide, ‘yawning’ at him.</p><p>He grinned, knowing what was coming. “Whaddya mean, yer tired? Ya barely did three squats.”</p><p>She pretended to yawn again. “I so tired.”</p><p>Tora lowered himself down in front of Charley; her big eyes were bright, illuminated by the playfulness that always lurked just behind them. She stared at him for a moment, then split her lips open, letting out another loud, fake yawn.</p><p>As soon as her mouth was cracked open all the way, Tora lifted his right hand and rapidly tapped at her lips with his fingers, causing her little voice to rattle and vibrate against his calloused pads.</p><p>“Ba ba ba ba ba ba,” her voice reverberated on his skin and then in a burst of giggles, she collapsed into his chest.</p><p>“’Kay, yer done distractin’ me, punk,” he said, pinching at her rounded belly, which caused her to erupt into another round of high-pitched laughter. “Gotta finish this work out and ya said you were gonna help. C’mon.”</p><p>With both hands under her armpits, Tora hoisted her off the floor and held her out in front of him. He assumed his previous position, feet hip-width apart, his back straight and tall.</p><p>“Doooown,” he said and lowered his body into a squat, grinning as she panted with laughter in his grasp, her wavy hair floating around her face as they descended toward the floor. “Upppp, dooooown.”</p><p>He smiled as he lifted Charley into the air and watched her dimpled hands stretch toward the ceiling. “I big, Daddy!” she squealed above his head. “I-I big like you!”</p><p>Pfft.</p><p>Yeah. No fucking place he’d rather be.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>October 3rd</em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“What do you mean, you don’t want to do <em>Howl’s</em> for Halloween?” Poppy asked their seven-year-old son, who was sitting at the kitchen island. His elbows were propped on the counter and his hands were supporting his head, buried in his wild mess of black hair.</p><p>Tyson said nothing and shrugged.</p><p>“A week ago you told me how excited you were about it,” Poppy pointed out. “Uncle Quincey and Uncle Jon said they’d <em>love </em>to dress up with you.”</p><p>“Mama, that was last week,” he mumbled. “Now I wanna be Spiderman.”</p><p>“You don’t want to be Calcifer?”</p><p>“Noooo. Spiderman. Cal can be Calcifer.”</p><p>At practically the same time, Tora watched both his son and wife’s cheeks puff out in frustration. He straightened his back then, recognizing his cue. His experience of being father and husband to the two tiny people sitting in front of him had granted him just a <em>bit </em>of wisdom in diffusing similar situations over the years.</p><p>He was going to have to step in; they were both too damn stubborn to resolve this themselves.</p><p>“But Granny and I have already started working on the costumes, Ty. Not even Markl? Charley’s already picked hers out.”</p><p>At this, Tora smirked. Three weeks ago, when they’d presented their toddler with costume options from <em>Howl’s Moving Castle, </em>Charley had pleasantly surprised them both.</p><p>“Granny!” Charlotte had cried.</p><p>“Do you mean Sophie?” Poppy asked. “You know you can be anyone you want. Howl, Calcifer, Turnip. I know how much you love Heen. You know, the doggie?”</p><p>“Granny, Mama!”</p><p>“Okay, okay,” his wife replied and swiped to another photo on her phone. “There are two Sophie’s, remember? Which one do you want to be?” Poppy pointed to the two cartoon faces on the screen: young, youthful Sophie with a dark brown braid and the withered face of Granny Sophie.</p><p>“Um, um, Granny El!” she shrieked, tapping at the image of the old woman.</p><p>Poppy had looked up at Tora from her seat on the couch then, biting her lip around a smile. “Granny Eleanor, huh? You want wrinkles and a cane like her?”</p><p>“Mmmhmm! My Granny El,” their daughter had replied.</p><p>“She’ll love to hear this, baby,” Poppy told her.</p><p>And just like that, Tora was recruited to create a miniature bird-headed cane for their daughter. For a week straight, he spent an hour a night in the garage, carving the shape from a block of foam, the rough, fucking unforgiving scratchy kind.</p><p>He found out quickly that wearing gloves didn’t help; the fabric made the material harder to grip and got in the way of his carving tools. He’d resorted to bare-handing it and was left with red, angry palms and scratched knuckles.</p><p>This time, Tora had noted as he washed his hands in the sink, watching the water turn pink as it swirled down the drain, the blood caked in his knuckles had been spilled for <em>love.</em></p><p>When he completed this labor of love, he’d handed the replica cane over to Poppy, who hovered over it for two nights, coating it with acrylic paint. When they finally showed the finished product to Charlotte, she’d fucking <em>squealed </em>and waddled around the house with it, demanding to “video Granny El” so she could show it to her.</p><p>The look on Charlotte’s face when Granny told her how happy she was that they “matched” had made the whole thing worth it, blistered hands and all.</p><p>And then… there was Tyson.</p><p>“Mama. No. <em>Spiderman!</em>” he cried, slapping his palms down on the counter.</p><p>Poppy’s face brightened red and she heaved a deep sigh. “Tyson Joseph, don’t you hit-“</p><p>Go-time.</p><p>“<em>Hey</em>,” Tora spoke up in a firm voice, his attention directed at Tyson. “Hittin’ things is <em>not </em>how we express ourselves, is it?”</p><p>Tyson glared up at him from beneath his thick bangs. “No,” he mumbled.</p><p>“What do we do instead?” Tora asked.</p><p>“Use our words,” his son answered.</p><p>“S’right. So why don’t ya tell me ‘n yer mom why it’s important to you to dress up as Spiderman?”</p><p>“Because… because he climbs,” Tyson told them seriously. “And he protects people! Like you do, Dad.”</p><p>Poppy’s eyes flickered over to Tora and the smallest smile began to ghost across her face. He raised his eyebrows at her and she gave him a slight nod.</p><p>“Bobby, why don’t we let him be Spiderman?” Tora said. “We can buy the costume so ya don’t gotta make it and we’ll still do the <em>Howl’s </em>thing. Tyson can protect us. Web any bad guys who try to steal our candy, right?”</p><p>Tyson noticeably perked up and spun around on the barstool to face his dad. “Yeah!” he said and outstretched his hand in front of him, palm up, tucking his middle and ring fingers in toward his wrist. “I’ll web ‘em!”</p><p>“Good. Everyone’s happy. Now go get yerself ready for bed, punk. Be up in a minute.”</p><p>“Kay!” Tyson responded, hopping down from the stool and skirting up the staircase, making soft little “webbing” noises with his mouth.</p><p>Once their son had disappeared upstairs, Tora shifted his eyes to Poppy, who was staring at him intently with her head cocked to one side.</p><p>“What?” he said.</p><p>“How do you do that?” Poppy asked.</p><p>“Do what, sweetheart?”</p><p>“Just… swoop in and know exactly what everyone needs to hear? He’s- he’s just so <em>stubborn </em>and I don’t know where he gets it from. I get so worked up that-“</p><p>Tora smirked at her and she rolled her eyes at him.</p><p>“Okay, fine, I <em>know </em>he gets it from me,” she laughed. “I’ve always been hardheaded and I think if you hadn’t been standing there, Spiderman and I would’ve been screaming at each other until it was way past his bedtime.”</p><p>“Ya both stubborn and ya both get excited about the same shit,” Tora told her. “Yer a lot alike, Bobby. Ain’t nothin’ wrong with that. Just gotta learn to pick ya battles,” he shrugged.</p><p>“Well, how do <em>you </em>do it?” she asked as she approached him, winding her arms around his wide waist. “How do you choose?”</p><p>He wrapped his arms around her and took a contented breath as he felt the weight of her head settle against his chest. “Dunno. Ain’t perfect, Bobby. Ya’ve heard me lose my temper with him. But guess… just, uh, just talked to Julia ‘bout it and sorta taught myself. Anytime he’s fighting me on somethin’, I ask myself, <em>Is this goin’ to change who he is when he’s grown up?</em>”</p><p>Tora paused, not wanting to voice the next words forming in his mind.</p><p>
  <em>Is this going to lead him down the same path as me?</em>
</p><p>He swallowed. “Is lettin’ him pick out Charley’s clothes or choosin’ his Halloween costume gonna stop him from bein’ a good man? If the answer is no, then I’m willin’ to work with him on it.”</p><p>“S’long as I see him standin’ up for the lil’ guy at school, runnin’ over to Charley when she falls down or tellin’ us when he’s done somethin’ bad, I’m happy. If ya lookin’ at the bigger picture, the rest of that shit doesn’t matter.”</p><p>For a moment, Tora’s mind drifted to when they’d first brought Charley home from the hospital. Tyson had been so confused, asking repeatedly where his brother was. When they explained that there <em>was </em>no brother, Tyson insisted adamantly for almost a week straight that they’d brought the wrong baby home.</p><p>So. Fucking. Stubborn.</p><p>After yet another conversation about his missing brother ended in a temper tantrum, they’d sat him down on the couch; he’d perched himself on Tora’s lap while Poppy cradled Charley in her arms as she breastfed.</p><p>“What’s some things ya love about Mama?” Tora asked Tyson.</p><p>Tyson squirmed around on Tora’s legs. “Um, t-that she kisses me and makes the hamster face! And that she plays superheroes and cars with me. And she has long hair and she’s silly!”</p><p>“Pfft, got that right. Mama’s a silly hamster, huh?” Tora chuckled.</p><p>“Yeah!” Tyson said and laughed as Poppy stuck out her tongue at them.</p><p>“What about Daddy?” Poppy asked as she stroked Charley’s head. “What are some things you love about him?”</p><p>“He-he’s big and he hugs me! He has long hair and he lets me put clips in it! He climbs the rock wall with me and tickles me and he-he loves me!” Tyson cried as he bounced on top of Tora’s thighs.</p><p>“Mmmhmm, he does love you,” Poppy told him. “And you love him, too, right?”</p><p>“Yeah!”</p><p>“And you know I love you. Do you love me?”</p><p>“Yeah, Mama.”</p><p>“And it doesn’t matter that I’m a girl and Daddy’s a boy, does it?” Poppy asked.</p><p>Tyson cocked his head at her quizzically. “No. I love you.”</p><p>“And it doesn’t matter that Charley is a girl,” his wife pointed out. “She’s still your sibling, she’s <em>family. </em>And when she’s bigger, she’ll want to do all the things that you do. Play with your toys, give hugs, read books and watch movies. Play superheroes and spa, go rock climbing. It doesn’t matter to her that you’re a boy. She loves you, baby.”</p><p>“She-she does?” Tyson asked, slowly creeping toward Poppy on the couch to hover over Charlotte.</p><p>“Mmmhmm, she does.”</p><p>“And she’s gonna want to be awesome like her big brother, remember?” Tora asked him, tapping lightly on his son’s foot.</p><p>“Yeah,” Tyson breathed and slowly tilted his head down to kiss his sister’s face. “I love you too, Charley.”</p><p>That was the last day Tyson ever asked about his brother.</p><p>“Mmmm,” Poppy murmured into Tora’s chest. “I don’t think we have anything to worry about. He’s a good boy. Stubborn, but good. And he’ll be a good man like his dad.”</p><p>Tora craned his neck to press a kiss to the top of her head. “Nah, Bobby. He’ll be better.”</p><p>---</p><p>
  <strong> <em>October 31<sup>st</sup></em> </strong>
</p><p>---</p><p>“Bobby, I know I said I’d go along with dressin’ up this year, but did I really hafta be <em>this</em>?” Tora asked, flapping his long, feathered arms once to emphasize his point.</p><p>Poppy peered up at him from her perch on the bathroom counter, a makeup brush and small compact in her grasp. “What? You don’t like Bird Howl?”</p><p>“Not really.”</p><p>“Hmmm,” Poppy said as she swirled the brush into a swatch of dark gray powder. “I’ve always had a crush on him. Plus, I think he suits you.”</p><p>“Pfft. So mermaids <em>and </em>birds get ya goin’, huh?” he chuckled and poked at her stomach just as she pointed the brush toward his face.</p><p>“Ack, stop! I’m going to get this all over you,” she laughed and gestured at him to close his eyes. He did and felt the soft swoosh of the brush passing over his eyelid.</p><p>“So why ya think he suits me?” he asked as she swept the brush across his other eye.</p><p>“Well, he’s tall…” She paused and he heard her blow air from her mouth. Probably put more makeup on the damn brush. It returned to his eye. “He’s dark and strong. And he’s misunderstood. He was never a monster, you know? He was just doing what he had to do to protect the people he loved, even if it meant he risked losing himself.”</p><p>Her words hit him hard in the chest, wrapping around his heart and squeezing it tight. Leave it to Poppy, always managing to knock the wind right out of him. “That so?” he breathed.</p><p>“Um, yeah. It’s the way I’ve always seen you. Sorry, I didn’t mean to get so heavy on you,” she laughed and he heard the slightest hint of nervousness coiled around the sound.</p><p>He reached his fingers out blindly and when they made contact with her thigh, he gave it a squeeze. She yelped and smacked playfully at his hand.</p><p>“But… why the makeup?” he finally asked. “Doesn’t wear any in the movie.”</p><p>“Oh, um. I’m improvising,” she told him. “It’s… hot.”</p><p>At that, he cracked his eye open to look at her. “Oh yeah?” he asked.</p><p>“Mmmhmm,” she murmured and drew her bottom lip between her teeth. “I think it looks nice on you.”</p><p>Christ, she always made it so easy.</p><p>“I think <em>you’d</em> look nicer on me.”</p><p>Poppy blushed. “What about under y-“</p><p>The door they’d left ajar slammed open and in a flash of red, Tyson leapt into the room, dressed in his Spiderman costume. “Mama! Dad! Uncle Quincey and Uncle Jon are here!”</p><p>Poppy hopped down from the counter and placed one hand over her chest, recovering from the abruptness of their son’s entrance. “O-okay, baby. Why don’t you let them in? I’ll go get Charley up from her nap and meet you downstairs.”</p><p>“Kay!” Tyson said from beneath his mask and shot out of the room.</p><p>As soon as Tyson was gone, Tora peered down at Poppy, her cheeks still tinted his favorite color. “So… what was that ya were sayin’, Bobby?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow at her.</p><p>She turned her back to him as she put away the makeup and brushes she’d been using. She slid the drawer shut and glanced at him over her shoulder. “Later, tiger,” she murmured and slipped out the door.</p><p>Tora let out a sigh. Before kids, he’d have immediately spun her around, pressed her into the counter and taken her from behind. Now when it came to sex, they had to be strategic, quiet or put it off altogether. Sometimes he missed it, the spontaneity, being able to fuck his wife whenever and wherever he wanted.</p><p>But then… there was something to be said about anticipation, of <em>finally </em>getting his hands on her. The promise and buildup of <em>later. </em></p><p><em>Worth the wait</em> was what he always told her. And it was as true now as it was then.</p><p>She always would be.</p><p>Tora turned to his reflection and regarded himself carefully. The dark, smudges of makeup around his eyes and the stripes of black outlining them brought out the intense gold of his irises.</p><p><em>It’s… hot</em>, Poppy had said.</p><p>Shit. If <em>that</em> was all it took…</p><p>Maybe he’d wear makeup for her more often.</p><p>---</p><p>“Well, hello, friendly neighborhood Spiderman,” Tora heard Quincey say as he stepped down from the staircase. “What are you doing here?”</p><p>“I’m going to protect us from any bad guys that might try to steal our candy!” Tora heard Tyson holler. His son’s voice was followed by a <em>thump a</em>nd he guessed that he was leaping through the damn air again.</p><p>“That’s great news, honey,” Quincey told him. “There’s only so much handsome, blonde wizards can do to keep us safe. I’ll need all the help I can get.”</p><p>Tora stalked around the corridor just in time to see Quincey flick a piece of his long blonde wig over his shoulder. Beside him stood Jonathan, dressed from head to toe as Turnip. His face was immaculately painted and he looked just as uncomfortable as Tora felt.</p><p>“Honeypot,” Quincey said as he swatted at the hand of his husband. “Stop touching your face! You don’t want to smudge it before we even leave the house.”</p><p>“My beard itches, Quincey,” the taller blonde man said. “It’s driving me crazy.”</p><p>“I thought this would happen. Why didn’t you shave it like you said you were going to? No Shave November doesn’t start until tomorrow.”</p><p>“I-I thought you had to have a beard for it?” Jonathan asked, looking puzzled.</p><p>“Oh honeypot, that’s not how it works…”</p><p>Jonathan glanced behind Quincey and his green eyes lit up when they fell on Tora. “Hey, Tora.”</p><p>Quincey whirled around then; the flamboyant pink and gray wizard coat that hung from his shoulders swayed with his movement. When his blue eyes landed on Tora, he pressed his lips together in a firm line.</p><p>“Hey, Big Bird,” he said through gritted teeth and then burst out into laughter.</p><p>Tora rolled his eyes and crossed his arms in front of him. His movement caused a tug on one of the feathers; it loosened from the fabric and then quietly dropped to the floor, which only made Quincey laugh harder.</p><p>“Honey, I’m sorry. Oh god, I’m so sorry. I just never thought I’d <em>see </em>the day that you willingly put on a Halloween costume. You refused to do it for so many years and now… It just makes me <em>so happy</em>.”</p><p>“Big Bird or not, can still beat your ass, Quince,” Tora grumbled, trying his best to keep his lips from lifting into a smirk.</p><p>“Tora, language,” he heard Poppy say as she appeared at his side with Charley in her arms. His sweet little daughter had been covered up with a white-collared blue dress, a gray braided wig and makeup lines of wrinkles drawn on her face. She had her foam cane clutched tightly in one tiny fist.</p><p>“C’mere, kit,” Tora said and lifted Charley from Poppy’s grasp. His two-year-old pressed her palm into his chest, seemingly holding him in place so she could take a good look at him. Her eyes wandered from his black, feathered arms to his made-up face. Gently, she reached out and touched her finger to the patch of skin just below his left eye.</p><p>“Daddy? You pretty,” she said, which caused Quincey to dissolve into laughter once more.</p><p>---</p><p>“Okay, guys, are we ready to go?” Poppy asked, the skirt of her long, green dress swishing behind her as she moved toward the front door. She reached for the straw hat hanging from the samurai sword holder and plunked it on her head. A long, brown braid trailed down her back, tied off with a pink bow. Tora smiled; she was always so thorough, planning everything down to the very last detail.</p><p>Cute ass little nerd.</p><p>“Quincey, here’s Callum’s leash,” she said as she gripped it into her hand and passed it over to the blonde wizard. “Are you okay with walking him?”</p><p>“As if you even had to ask,” Quincey said and spun on his heel, backtracking into the family room. “Oh, scary, powerful fire demon? Where are <em>yoooou</em>? Oh, there you are, grumpy old man. You’re coming with us!”</p><p>Quincey returned to the entryway a few moments later, leash in hand and a bored looking Callum in tow. To Tora’s surprise, the Calcifer costume Poppy had thrown together with felt and a few stitches was still firmly in place over the Cavapoo’s torso.</p><p>Tora lowered himself into a squat beside the dog. “Sorry, punk,” he told him and ruffled Cal’s head. “Tried to talk ‘em out of it.”</p><p>He returned to his full height and faced Poppy. “Do we have a bottle of water for him? Ya know how he gets on walks nowadays.”</p><p>“Oh, good idea. Would you mind grabbing one for me?”</p><p>“Kay.”</p><p>As Tora approached the refrigerator, his gaze drifted to the bottom of the stainless steel door. The magnets they’d collected over the years had migrated south, to just above his knees where Tyson and Charley could reach.</p><p>A set of colorful letters that Tora left dirty messages with on the rare occasions they had the house to themselves.</p><p>A tacky, rubber one from Fiji and several generic metal magnets holding up the kid’s drawings and family pictures.</p><p>He crouched down and his eyes drifted from photo to photo: Eleanor tucking both of the kids into a hug, all three laughing in the direction of the camera. Gyu and Mirabelle at Tyson’s last birthday party. Shit, they were off somewhere in Europe now, celebrating their honeymoon.</p><p>When Gyu told him they were planning an international trip, Tora was happy for him. It was about time the hacker nerd got out from behind his computer screen and saw the world.</p><p>A photo of Poppy carrying a screaming nine-month-old Tyson down the aisle at Quincey’s wedding. Christ, what a day <em>that </em>had been. Hundreds of people stuffed inside some fancy museum with overpriced flower sprays every-fucking-where and high windows overlooking the sea.</p><p>Give Tora a beach wedding <em>any </em>day.</p><p>Why would anyone ever want a wall between themselves and the ocean?</p><p>Tora had been his brother’s best man and also given him away; he’d worn a soft gray suit that tugged tightly across his chest and even allowed his brother to wrap a stupid tie around his neck.</p><p>While they’d been crowded in the foyer prepared to make their entrance, Tyson decided to throw a huge temper tantrum in Poppy’s arms. As the music cued up, they’d tried everything to pacify him: his favorite toy, silly faces, playing airplane with Quincey. Nothing worked and then it was time for Poppy to escort the crying ringbearer down the aisle.</p><p>Tora had bit back laughter as he stood beside his brother, arm linked through his, watching as his tiny wife carried their screeching son toward the altar with her head held high. As soon as she reached the front, she blew a kiss to Jonathan and Gyu, who was officiating, then cut to the right and kept going until she’d exited the hall.</p><p>Quincey had chuckled under his breath and shook his head. “Little show stealer,” he murmured.</p><p>“Pfft. Pot, meet the fuckin’ kettle,” Tora had replied and then walked his brother forward.</p><p>It was a crazy day; over the top, obnoxious and very <em>Quincey</em>, but it was a good day nonetheless.</p><p>Tora’s eyes flickered then to another grouping of photos: Poppy’s dad when he was young, his brown eyes bright and wide. A nervous looking Joe in uniform receiving some kind of plaque.</p><p>Alice, holding Charley for the first and last time.</p><p>Alice had passed away just two days after she met Charlotte. Like she wanted to hold on long enough to witness the last piece of the puzzle lock into place, to see his happiness complete.</p><p>She was the first person he could remember losing to natural causes, to illness. This fact was the only thing that kept him grounded while he and Poppy attempted to explain to Tyson why he couldn’t see Gramma Alice anymore.</p><p>She went peacefully in her sleep, without a care or worry in the world. It was the way she deserved to go; the old woman had always cared and worried so much. She deserved to leave this world lighter than she lived it. Surviving a husband and her only child. Tora and his anger. The closure of the only job she’d ever known.</p><p>She’d left everything material in her life to him, the deed to her restaurant and a box of personal belongings. Among them were Tora’s job application, the framed picture of himself and Poppy they’d gifted to her for Christmas all those years ago. Joe’s badge. His ring. His bracelet.</p><p>Alice had tried to give him Joe’s jewelry when he died, but Tora had been too ashamed to take it. He was <em>mafia</em> and never felt worthy. Joe was too good and Tora was never good enough.</p><p>Settled on top of Alice’s belongings was a simple note. It was addressed to Alley Cat, her nickname for him growing up. The piece of paper was now deeply creased and worn from its years spent in his wallet.</p><p>Five words and he carried them with him every day.</p><p>
  <em>You deserved a second chance.</em>
</p><p>Tora blinked hard as he spun Joe’s ring around the middle finger of his left hand, smiling as it clinked softly against his wedding band. His eyes roamed over the collection of pictures once more, noting the absence of Goliath and Tyson. They had no photos of them to show the kids, but they would know their names. One day they would understand who they were and why they were important.</p><p>So many stories on the face of their fridge. So many endings, but some beginnings too.</p><p>Tora heaved a sigh as he stood and opened the refrigerator door, reaching inside to clutch a bottle of water. When he closed it, he was met with a little head full of gray hair. Charley turned her tiny face up to him, covered in fake wrinkles, lines of wisdom she hadn’t earned yet.</p><p>He smiled down at her and then his heartbeat caught in his throat as she turned her attention to the photo of herself and Alice. She leaned in toward it and pressed a loud, smacking kiss to the photo, right over Alice’s face. She waggled her chubby fingers at it.</p><p>“Bye, Gramma Alice!” she cried out. Her large eyes met Tora’s and she reached up for his hand. “Daddy coming?”</p><p>“Yeah. Yeah, sweetheart,” he said, stooping over so she could grasp his pointer finger in her fist. “I’m comin’.”</p><p>---</p><p>“Oh, my god, how much longer?” Quincey whined from behind Tora. “I didn’t realize all the <em>walking </em>involved in this. I would’ve worn more practical shoes.”</p><p>“Quincey, we’ve only walked a block,” Poppy spoke up from beside Tora. “Haven’t you ever been trick or treating before?”</p><p>“Of <em>course </em>I have, Mrs. Editor. But we weren’t <em>heathens </em>about it. We had a limousine and a driver take us everywhere. People came up to the car and dropped candy in my bag through the window.”</p><p>“But… that’s not really-“</p><p>Tora cut Poppy off with a quick squeeze of her hand.</p><p>“Don’t get the princess started,” he mumbled to her under his breath. She bit her lip around a smile and offered him a slight nod.</p><p>“So Jonathan,” she redirected, “have you ever…”</p><p>The conversation faded around Tora as he zeroed in on Tyson and Charley, who were walking a few feet ahead of them, colorful candy bags swaying from their hands. Every now and then, Charley would let go of her foam cane and continue forward without it.</p><p>After the third time, Tora resolved to just carrying it the rest of the way but before he could duck down to grab it, Tyson stopped and turned quickly, picking the cane up from the ground and continuing forward.</p><p>Tora watched and listened as his two kids chattered excitedly in front of him. He strained to hear what they were saying when suddenly their steps paused and Tyson tilted his head at Charley expectantly.</p><p>Charley shifted her little feet apart, put her hands out in front of her and lowered herself into a clumsy squat. “Dooooow. Uppppppt. Doooow. Bubby, doooow!”</p><p>Tora heard Tyson laugh as he curled into a squat beside his sister. “Am I doing it right, Charley?”</p><p>“Yeah!” she squealed and then stood up quickly, distracted by a passing throng of kids dressed in various, brightly-colored costumes.</p><p>She waved her little hand at them. “Hi! Hi! Love you! Hi!” she cried out.</p><p>The kids responded happily, waving back and shaking their bags of candy at her. As cute as it could be, Tora felt himself wincing internally, petrified of how unafraid she was of strangers. More than once he’d had to run after her in a public place and disentangle her from where she’d wrapped herself around the legs of a random person.</p><p>He <em>did</em> appreciate how much his little girl loved others, her innocence and how <em>easy </em>it was for her to trust. It was something he himself had never been given the chance to do.</p><p>Charlotte was full of surprises and so accepting of everyone. But as positively as they viewed it, he and Poppy were still working with her on the idea of safety and boundaries; he hoped it was something she came to understand or grow out of soon before she gave him a damn heart attack.</p><p>They continued marching forward and turned down the sidewalk, Tora and the other adults pausing at the end while Tyson took Charley’s hand and led her to the front door of a dark wood house. An elderly woman answered the door with a grin and a large bowl filled to the brim with candy.</p><p>He heard his kids’ chimes of “Trick or treat!” and then watched them wait patiently as the woman dropped several pieces of candy into their bags.</p><p>“What do we say, Charley?” Tyson asked, gazing down at his little sister.</p><p>“Fank you! Love you!” Charley cried and then turned and toddled back down the sidewalk toward their group.</p><p>“Love you too,” the old woman laughed and then he watched her say something to Tyson before she closed her door.</p><p>“What’d she say to ya, punk?” Tora asked as Tyson rejoined them.</p><p>Tyson took his mask off and shook out his messy black hair. “Said I was a good big brother,” his son said as he beamed up at him.</p><p>Tora smirked and ruffled his son’s hair. “Ain’t wrong.”</p><p>---</p><p>They continued to trek forward, stopping at houses that were dotted with lights. When they reached the end of their street, they halted on the sidewalk, checking for traffic.</p><p>Tyson and Charley moved up to the curb and Tora felt Poppy’s hand tug from his as she lurched forward.</p><p>“Hey, wait for us!” she called.</p><p>Tyson immediately stopped on the edge of the concrete slope. “We’re waiting, Mama.”</p><p>The kids paused until the adults caught up to them and Tora watched silently as his son looked down at Charley. He thrust his arm out in front of her, keeping her from taking another step into the street.</p><p>Without a word, his daughter reached up and gripped Tyson’s hand. Tyson wrapped his fingers tightly around hers, and paused, shifting his gaze from one side of the road to the other. There were no cars.</p><p>When he was satisfied it was safe to cross, he gently pulled Charley forward.</p><p>“Eager, aren’t they?” Quincey chuckled as they followed shortly behind the kids. When they reached the other side of the street, Tyson stepped over the curb and helped Charley clear it; his hand never left hers, her foam cane and his candy bag still clutched in his other hand.</p><p>“Yeah,” Tora said, swallowing hard. “Try ‘n stop ‘em.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Because it's a spoiler, I wanted to include it here:<br/>MAJOR kudos to my husband Travis, not only for beta-reading and listening to me read Stages out loud to him (that's right, smut scenes and ALL) but schooling me in the video game set-up and the ramen recipe/preparation scenes. He's pretty cool :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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